post-partum depression

I am 23 1/2 years old and I have 2 kids, a 2 1/2 year old and a 3 1/2 month old. I feel no connection to my 3 month old at all. I take care of him and make sure that he has everything he needs at this point, but I would rather be with my 2 year old. When my 2 year old was born, I looked into his eyes and I knew that he was the greatest achivement of my life and when I was pregnant with my 3 month old I was in that same frame of mind. When he was born though I didn't feel anything. I was just wondering if it is because I am a horrible mother or if it is post-partum depression...I am not depressed or at least I don't feel like I am depressed. I am just over-whelmed and I am just wondering if that is my problem

[michelle_rusty]

you should talk with ur dr n see what they suggest but it could be post partum depression. you may need some meds to get things(hormones) all evened out. good luck to you and that bond will come soon you are not a horrible mom one good thing you have going for you is that you can admit it. thats a good sign that you want to know why you are feelings this way

[lovethebops]

It definitely sounds like PPD to me by many definitions I have found. I would talk to your health care provider to see what steps would be best for you, wether it be talks with a therapist, medication, etc. There is no shame in having PPD, I have struggled with it myself. I have been there, my dd was 2 1/2 when my other dd was born. I often felt very overwhelmed , I still do :) Its not easy having kids, especially more than one. You are not a bad mother, you just need a little intervention. A doctor will definatley direct you in the right direction. Ignoring it could be dangerous. Best of luck!

[deanne11]

Absolutely talk to your Dr.  

I had PPD and also was not depressed.  But I had other issues that led my family and eventually Drs to believe I had it.

I have heard several mothers feel the same way after the 2nd, 3rd child.  

You are not a bad mom, you are looking for direction and help, guidance.
That is wonderful.

You don't want it to go any longer without talking to someone though.  These are critical bonding times with your new son.

I am guessing that it is just a total overwhelming experience.  Having 2 kids was not easy, in fact, for the first 2 months....I was miserable.

Did I love my son, yes, but the amount of work that was involved....I was so overwhelmed and sad, thinking I was no good at being a mom of 2, when I knew I was a great mom of 1.

My son is 10 months old (monday 11th)....it's wonderful now.  I am so happy and in love with my children....I just needed a little help in the beginning.

[Michele, Katy, TX]

Yes, please talk to your doctor.  I would have just said what others have already said.  But I too have suffered from PPD after having all of my 5 kids.

Even if you don't feel depressed, or you don't think you do, not bonding with your son and not feeling a connection is def a symptom so please contact your doc.

[lovethebops]

Deanne-Your post perfectly described how I felt after I had my second. I did not feel depressed, just very overwhelmed, over worked and it affected me in other ways, like in my marriage, etc..I was directed to a therapist by my Midwife and was fine after that.

Nicole-I really hope you are feeling back on track and adjusted soon!