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Maternal (Expert Forum)
Re: Potty training
Patient medical question and answer from The Maternal and Child Health Forum. Health topic area and articles about newborn care
Re: Potty training
by Tamy__0, Jan 01, 1995 12:00AM
Posted By Tammy on August 24, 1998 at 20:59:47:
In Reply to: Re: Potty training posted by Kirsten on August 24, 1998 at 07:04:57:
My child (son) is 3yrs old. Will be 4 in April 99- We have still yet to get him fully potty trained. He will urinate in the potty, and never 'pees' in the bed or his pants.. But the other.. he absolutely refuses to do.. on occasion, if I set there with him long enough, reading books, playing, for 1/2hr or more at times.. he will go.. but he tells me its going to hurt. he's never had any problem with constipation or anything. We can set there for 1/2 and nothing, yet 5-10 mins after we get up, he will go hide and go in his pants. I've tried taking him once an hour to see if we can just catch it at the right time, but still he will wait until we get up from the potty and go hide to do it. Im afraid to punish him for not doing it, or for going in his pants - like some relatives tell me to do. I dont want to damage him in any way mentally on the idea of goin potty.. Im at a loss as to what to do. I also know that children do things at different ages. Any suggestions?
I am the mother of 5 children, 4 of whom are potty trained. I have had two of my children react the same way as you describe. My suggestion to you would be to just continue doing as you are doing. It will come. You are right not to try and push too hard, as that can cause both you and the child major headaches and heart aches. My oldest started being a bit resistant to the idea of bowel training, but we, not knowing any better, tried to punish him, scold him, nothing really bad, but we let him know we felt he should be able to use the toilet and that we were disappointed. Well, that didn't work AT ALL! In fact, that just made the times he did have a bowel movement pure torture. I thought we were going to have the police breaking down our door because neighbors thought we were beating the child. Now, my 4th child had the same kind of thing, but we had learned our lesson well. We were gently encouraging and very patient. And amazingly, one day, she just decided she was going to use the potty for that. From that time, she's basically been potty trained. Good luck and remember, he is almost there and time will help.
Just leave him be, but try to make sure that is bowel movements are soft enough to not "hurt". My 5 year old was the same way. He would sit on the toilet and then go hide and go in his pants. But I found that making sure it was "soft" enough helped. I gave him Metamucil for about a month. Only once a day, and it did help. He was scared it was going to hurt, so I told him the stuff he was drinking once a day was to help make it not hurt. After a year of pulling my hair out, telling him that worked! Whatever
you do, don't yell or punish him. Just encourage him. It will come. Best of luck.
In Reply to: Re: Potty training posted by Kirsten on August 24, 1998 at 07:04:57:
My child (son) is 3yrs old. Will be 4 in April 99- We have still yet to get him fully potty trained. He will urinate in the potty, and never 'pees' in the bed or his pants.. But the other.. he absolutely refuses to do.. on occasion, if I set there with him long enough, reading books, playing, for 1/2hr or more at times.. he will go.. but he tells me its going to hurt. he's never had any problem with constipation or anything. We can set there for 1/2 and nothing, yet 5-10 mins after we get up, he will go hide and go in his pants. I've tried taking him once an hour to see if we can just catch it at the right time, but still he will wait until we get up from the potty and go hide to do it. Im afraid to punish him for not doing it, or for going in his pants - like some relatives tell me to do. I dont want to damage him in any way mentally on the idea of goin potty.. Im at a loss as to what to do. I also know that children do things at different ages. Any suggestions?
I am the mother of 5 children, 4 of whom are potty trained. I have had two of my children react the same way as you describe. My suggestion to you would be to just continue doing as you are doing. It will come. You are right not to try and push too hard, as that can cause both you and the child major headaches and heart aches. My oldest started being a bit resistant to the idea of bowel training, but we, not knowing any better, tried to punish him, scold him, nothing really bad, but we let him know we felt he should be able to use the toilet and that we were disappointed. Well, that didn't work AT ALL! In fact, that just made the times he did have a bowel movement pure torture. I thought we were going to have the police breaking down our door because neighbors thought we were beating the child. Now, my 4th child had the same kind of thing, but we had learned our lesson well. We were gently encouraging and very patient. And amazingly, one day, she just decided she was going to use the potty for that. From that time, she's basically been potty trained. Good luck and remember, he is almost there and time will help.
Just leave him be, but try to make sure that is bowel movements are soft enough to not "hurt". My 5 year old was the same way. He would sit on the toilet and then go hide and go in his pants. But I found that making sure it was "soft" enough helped. I gave him Metamucil for about a month. Only once a day, and it did help. He was scared it was going to hurt, so I told him the stuff he was drinking once a day was to help make it not hurt. After a year of pulling my hair out, telling him that worked! Whatever
you do, don't yell or punish him. Just encourage him. It will come. Best of luck.
