A Promise ring

my 17 1/2 year old whos already preenlisted in the army for a three year tour ....just bought his girlfiend of almost a year a "promise" ring meaning they will wait the three years for each other and get engaged when he gets home.....what do you all think the odds are that will happen???

Hes very in love with her but I seen him holing another girls hand once...shes inlove with him but shes beautiful, only 16 and a cheerleader has 2 years of school left....

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12%

 (5) 

1. they will be faithful and get married

0%

 (0) 

2. he will cheat

12%

 (5) 

3. she will cheat

74%

 (29) 

4. they wont last three years

39 Members voted

[mami1323]

I don't know if they will cheat on one another but I think the distance will eventually get to them.  She will feel lonely, and either go to someone else or she may just break up with him because of the time apart.  Same for him.  I don't think it will work.

[April2]

Long distance relationships are hard enough for older adults. It's even harder for young people. My son was deeply in love with his high school sweetheart, too. She had to move away right after their high school graduation. He went to see her a few months later. It barely lasted a year. She wanted to date others. He was devastated but you know what? That showed me it wasn't meant to be.
Only time will tell whether their love is strong enough to pass the test of time.

[MJIthewriter]

It sounds very sweet of your son to give her that ring.

I wish there was a "time will tell"  feature. That way it leaves it open.  It's going to be hard for it to last, considering they will have to put it on hold for 3 years. In that time both will probably meet new people and those new people may or may not be more suitibe for them. Who knows. Only time will tell.

[jollyman069]

better then and engagement ring

[msniki412]

Like everybody eles said long distant relationships are hard enough for adults but when your a teen, its a lot harder (more temptation with school and other outings). But hopefully maybe it will last, you never know. Like my mom always said, if its meant to be then it will be.

[dominosarah]

Jollyman you took the words right out of my mouth.......Oh that was a good song now that i think about it!!!!!!

Young love is just what it is......Im a firm believer in if it is meant to be it will be......

[April2]

If you love something, set it free. If it comes back to you, it's yours. If it doesn't, it never was.

[GRose]

I think it is very sweet of your son to do that but 16 and 17 in my opinion, is pretty young to promise your heart to someone. I hope it does work out but I feel like she may get lonely and stray away but then again maybe she wont, just depends, only time will tell. It would be an awesome story for them to tell their grand kids if it does work out.

[Cherie762]

it was sweet its a sterling silver ring with two of the tiniest diamonds but it came from his heart and they got it so bad for each other,,honestly I like her alot itd be great with me if they got enganged bought a house, got married abd had a baby,,in that order LOL,,,we shall see it makes me remember my first love,,,,,age 17 we broke up ,,,because he joined the navy....

[MJIthewriter]

Time will tell.  That's all we can do, is hope for the best no matter what.  This is his story. If it works out he will have something to share, but if not, then that may be okay too. It's pretty much up to fate now...

[frustrated431]

you know i love ya but the cards are stacked against them but if its TRUE LOVE and i hope it is then it will all work out and if it doesnt then hopefully they both learn something from it

[heatherlynn22]

i couldn't vote because...i honestly don't know. like your sons g/f my husband was a marine when we started dating. if we hadn't known each other prior we probably wouldn't have started dating (we'd been friends since we were 6). he was in japan for 3 years....our entire dating and engagment. i saw him MAYBE one week out of the year. when he was in iraq i only got to talk to him for 5-10 minutes every 2-4 weeks. he'd occasionally be able to send me an email but that was it. i had no idea where he was or if he was ok. it was hard. very very hard. we broke up 3 times during our dating/engagement. we ended up getting reengaged at the marine corps ball in 2007. we have now been married almost 1 year and have 6 month old twin boys.

if they are dedicated to each other and love each other...they'll last. it's hard but not impossible. even if they break up here and there....don't worry. if they truly are in love no matter what they'll end up together. trust your son and his g/f to make the right decision. just support them and love them.

good luck to them.

[kitty51]

the bottom line line is love is love no matter how old you are ,and if its meant to be it will happen. Well thats my story and Im sticking to it :)

[ChitChatNine]

I voted before I viewed the responses --

Not sure what's going to happen in the next 3 yrs, but perhaps this will be a true test of what is or isn't their true feelings the best they know at this age.  I don't think either will cheat per se, but one or the other may start dating somebody else and make a clean break.

C~

[margypops]

Same thing happened to me , but we did meet other poeple and then married other people, then met up again ,and finally married, hey thats almost a wreck now aswell!!

[Cherie762]

thats interesting Margy guess it was destiny for you !!  many of us on here seem to be going through wrecks with our marriages ..wish you luck with yours.

[pbbsmommy]

The same thing happend to me and the relationship didn't work cause I was lonely and wanted to see other people and he was in the navy at the time. so we decide it would be best to break it off.  But who knows it may work or it may not. Well I say good luck and hope to the couple.

sincerly,
Kendra

[AndiJ78]

I don't know that I have really met anyone who had a promise ring situation work out. To me, the promise ring is like a non-committal engagement or like one of those 10 year engagements women get duped into that never end in marriage.

I hope the best for them, but my own limited experience tells me this will not end in their marriage.

[Lizzy1989]

if its meant to be it will be before i got married and i was preenlisting in the SC national guard and i had to go to basic and now im fixen to be shipped out for a 12 month tour which will suck cause ill miss my hubby but still itll be ok

[Lizzy1989]

yes its true sumtimes engagements dont work out but its not always true i had a promise ring and it worked out into marriage and its been great

[suzi-q]

I said it won't last...but this is what I really mean...My choice wasn't really there.....I think they will go there separate ways these next few years...AND THEY SHOULD....when he comes back...if "it" is still there....they will have a happily ever after!  If "it" is not still "there"...then, well.....they will have a happily ever after with someone else!~

I just hope neither feels guilty for keeping options opened!  They are young and should date many others!

Also...WAY TOO YOUNG FOR A PROMISE RING!!! OR ANY RING!!!  Tell them to stay friends and then see what happens....She is still a baby!!!  And he will be doing plenty of growing up in the military.

Also, I would like to say, THANK YOU to your son for serving our country.  It is men like him that give us all the freedoms we have today!

[Cherie762]

I agree with you completley but I cant tell them what to do he will be an adult in a few short months I dont hes gonna have to love and learn I do offer my opinion...

[msgorgeous]

They are still young and they both still have to find who they are as a person soo odds of them being to gether at the end of those three years are slim.they may change as time goes by but i wish them the best of luck and thank ur son hes doing a great thing :)

[Cherie762]

thank you to those who thank my son Im proud of him but of course as a mom I worry...

[lonewolf07]

Just a word from a nerd  = )  In the times of Henry VIII, a man and woman would become "betrothed" - more formal than being engaged.  Being betrothed, in theory, meant they were "married" but had not yet had the wedding ceremony.  Unless money was the reason for the betrothal (sp?) they seldom lasted.

Despite that, I hope they both get what they want and are happy.

[Linzola1]

I did not read all of the above posts, but from some expierance....

I am 20 now but back when I was about 16 I had a boyfriend ( Who was also older) give em a promise ring for when he went to college..... Well needless to say it didnt make it to the day he left....

If it makes it that far, the distance will probably get to them espically because he will always wonder if she is cheating on him while he is away.

Im sorry my advice is not too promisingbutI want to be realistc!

[Burrpatch]

The odds and stats are strongly against it. Most soldiers know and have been told ahead of time by their D.I.'s that Jodi won't be there when Johnny comes home. The tear soaked floors of countless of barracks worldwide can testify to the casualties of love by the torn up "Dear John" and "Dear Jane" letters that are heaped upon them though the generations.   .... Sadly, today more than ever.  ... I wish them all the luck the world can give. I thought my heart would never stop aching when I received one of these letters !! Then reality hit. Four years is a long time. A lifetime at that age !!  ... BP.

[drifter0213]

people change !- scotty

[Cherie762]

well Im offically addicted to this site so in 3 years ( thats his tour) I shall let you all know !!!!

[AnxiousGurl]

I cant tell you what will happen, but my best friend has been dating a marine for one year now, they are 24 and much more mature than a 17 yr old im sure. It depends on them, and I guess there's no telling what will happen but, if he is serious, I hope she wont break his heart.

[AnxiousGurl]

Only time will tell~!