Menopause, wrinkles and ugh

[MsDaisyee]

Before menopause, I was seen to be younger than my years, but about 3 years after menopause things started to take a drastic turn for the worse and I developed all these lines mainly on my face.  When these little lines first appeared I turned to an array of facial products and facial exercises in order to save my face.  Now the lines have become deep and nothing is helping, and I find it hard to look in the mirror and believe what I'm seeing.  While I was exposed to some sun in the past, I don't believe I was out there as much as many and they don't look as bad as I do.  I am underweight, so my natural estrogen supply has probably closed down all together.  I'm not a senior yet but get all these discounts without asking.  Can anyone suggest anything, or just tell me that I'm not alone and that there's some one out there with a face as old as mine has become.  that may help. Thanx.

[MsDaisyee]

Has your doctor advised taking hormones after the surgical pause?  Taking hormones is a very personal thing that one must outweigh any risks and be monitored often, but yes, they do seem to have a plumping effect on  skin.  I know because at one time the doctor did put me on them, unfortunately I could not stay on them.  

[chtps]

I read you post and I feel your pain. I'm 52 ad was thrown into surgical pause at 50. I have always looked younger than I am. Truly wish I didn't have the surgery. My skin has changed a little, but I am fighting it every step of the way. with chemical peels etc..I am joining  gym next week.
I also have a juicer so I'm starting that. I don't think it matters what age you are when you go through menopause. It throws you for a loop. period.
Please read my post I wrote earlier. It describes my experience.

[MsDaisyee]

First of all, let me tell you that I love your response, especially the comment about the recycled teenagers...still chuckling, wonder how many of those are running around.  Well, I don't know much about our genes but perhaps, somewhere along the line something gets broken in the gene line and gets passed down to future generations.  I am under the understanding that if you give your body the right building blocks and minerals that it can heal (even wrinkles)  and revert somewhat to it's original form.   Yes, society does promote youth.  The women you see in the glam magazines who are trying to sell you a bottle of wrinkle cream is often in her 20's.  No wonder she is flawless.  Hollywood also promotes their older actresses by enhancing and photo chopping them to look like they have the perfect face and perfect body.  Most people think, well if she can look that good at her age, I want to as well.   Having said that, I cannot afford plastic surgery, injections and the like.  I have tried several wrinkle creams,  and can't say they are all bad, if one is consistent, some do return the moisture back into a dehydrated face and do minimize wrinkles.  At home I do not wear make up, When I go out I don't even wear foundation anymore, mostly lipstick, and blush and mascara.  I think every woman should feel good about herself whether she wears make up or not, whether she has surgery, or injections, or dermabrasion or not.  We are all individuals and have to feel comfortable and happy in our own skin.  Perhaps they should call aging a journey of acceptance.  

[DevotedPharmTech]

No one should have to go through a visibly rapid aging process. My mother went through it my grandmother did too. Amazingly it skipped my great grandmother.... she was awesome always acting at least 30 years younger than she actually was. I think she really was a recycled teenager, but one from her youth no way ours. smh then again,  my gramma was asking for it... she drank heavily and smoked heavily as well on top of having other dangerous health problems which can accelerate visible aging.

I appreciate you being willing to share the things you are facing and trying to deal with this oh so visible process (i live in an unforgiving area of the nation, your youth is everything, no one cares what you think if you cant keep your tummy flat like at 20, and your face 30, and your personality at 18 but also dont EVERlet them guess you are 40 plus) I keep telling my husband NO WOMAN looks like that at 50 plus. None I have ever seen anyway. And everything on tv is a set... its fake. Reality can really suck.

...so I know its hard cause the whole world almost seems that way... always someone ready to push you off the edge.... but really, it isnt that way. That was the way I felt when I was 35.  I truly wish the best for you and hope very much that you can find some grace and kindness in some method leaving you able to at least return to semi normal.

Don't underestimate treating yourself. It can go a long way. Right now I do not really have someone to "spoil" me even a lil bit. If you do, and you like it, keep it... at least once a week. Gawd even my sex drive is gone. That was the most difficult thing to lose. Until it was gone! (I have other complications though id rather not talk about publicly). After I lost sex drive I was pretty much okay believe it or not.

I have complaints sure, and have bad bad bad days.



Additionally I think we should teach our young girls about aging, how to age and that it is NATURAL! Of course the first amount of money I get to cover a facelift, I will naturally go buy a little more youthful face too and neck!

Read that above

ONE MORE TIME. I do not think we set our kids up for aging nor anything else in the future at least not near enough.

ooh what i really want is a mommy makeover package.... yeah i aint holding my breath long ....

I have been showing signs of accellerated aging since I had my last child. It hit me hard and fast. Once my daughter was 2 I had lost just about all my long hair. It thinned out so bad I had more scalp showing than hair. I am not over stating that at all. I got my long weave and it costs a lot but rather that than have no personal pride at all.

My skin has an uneven color to it, not age spots per se but splotchy complexion. I am overweight which I actually did not admit to until AFTER giving birth to my daugher as well. i used to weigh in at around 99-110 lbs. constant... now, not so much. lol Sometimes I can get my face to thin out for 8-10 hours with a spa body or neck, head, face wrap.

i take it in stride though, despite all my perimenopause symptoms. (my husband is unconvinved I am having them but then he is not alltogether sure PMS or meno are actual syndromes or dysfunctions. smh). I know dont start yelling.. trust me I know.

I work, I just finished college in a whole new field (pharm technology) and no I will not likely go on with my education.

I am tired, my periods keep going fitzy on me, I cant take the hot flashes in a room with 20 somethings!!!! I am smart I have nothing to prove not even to OMG should I say, a man! I get so tired of that stereotype in other women... not being mean, just saying... besides I have been married a very long time 27 years!

Put away the face creams and aging treatments because none of them work and none of them last very long. The only thing I am using now is some light non oil containing face cream, might be regenerist though I am considering something else I may like better. Suggest away.

Foundation I only wear Nearly Naked by Revlon,I have specific eye cream and brightener Olay Regenerist eye brightener. Works really well. but its like 20 bucks. I used to wear Cura C by Borgheesa. (sp)? and then some nice translscent loose powder because I hate NOT having a Matte finish. If I ever have to change my make up because of aging YOU guys neeeeeed to have suggestions please! waaah

I really like it here. Even though most of my dialog has been privated held, and I have avoided website forums like the plague... this one really is nice.

Thanks guys for making it so

Take your vitamins, stick to healthy food, (unless ya gotta cheat once in a while) keep your hair clean and if your hair can take it make some home made smelly good oil to condition it and make is smell exotic. I like sandalwood or patchouli, but mostly i just wear a Loreal brand of lightweight hair oil. Kinda new but I LOVE this stuff. Really does keep aging hair nice and smooth. Lastly get out and walk or bike!

I used to belly dance, run, swim, cycle, climb in an indoor rock park and a ton of other things.. but I learned that just because I cannot do all of those things now, I can still do some.

I take care of myself, I was not at ALL ashamed of my gray hair. I had plenty silver in my dark brown hair. I never hated it or colored it because it reminded me of the things my great grandmother would say, teach me help me with.

She never used anything on her face but actual cooking grease on her neck, mayo, avacado, and some kind of rag she called her smoothing rag. Anyone else ever heard of that? I am dying to know what that darn rag was.

I wear very little makeup either, just like her. I wear a bit of mascara, a nude color berry lip color, tone n texture spf 15 evens out my skin somewhat but not completely.  

[MsDaisyee]

Thank you for sharing.  Sorry that you are going through this at such a young age.   Even if one is older than 45 or 50, rapid aging or to look in the mirror and see a rapid change of appearance is disturbing to just about every one.   Think we mourn the loss of youthfulness.  It must be harder when one is very young.   It's one thing when you start noticing things  little by little, but boom! when it seems to comes like overnight, just like the sagging arms, it can be depressing.    I think we all need time to accept aging gradually and accept the changes and should be happy with ourselves and not have to shun the mirror. .

The last I had my tests, cholesterol was okay and my triglycerides had fallen to normal and my thyroid tests were okay, however my iron is not.  Don't know how bad a 6.2 is for iron levels is, but my doctor wants to give me an iron transfusion when he returns.

I wish you the best.

[nutmeg989]

Hi Jen
I can so relate to your post, I went into sudden menopause at age 39 due to Chemotherapy treatment for Breast Cancer, I sent you a message and wanted to see if I could ask you a question about your hormone treatment.
Thanks so much!

[jen819]

Hi MsDaisyee.  I know this is an old post so I hope this reaches you.  I am 34 almost 35 who had a ful hysterectomy at 28 along with the one ovary I had left.  Big mistake.  At 28, I looked 10-12 years younger so I know your pain!!  At 31, my body started to completely fall apart!  All of a sudden, I had dark circles under my eyes, my skin become super dry and I started getting wrinkles under my eyes that just kept coming on as well as my perky breasts seeme to be deflating before my very eyes.  Lets not forget that my beautful hair suddenly became dry, falling out and no oil in it anymore, huge loss of energy.  People can say what they will but that one was hard to swallow when I aged so rapidly that I knew something was wrong with this whole picture.  Everyone wants to just assume that it's normal to have something happen like that when your 45 or 50.  But at 31???? I finally found a doctor that specialized in hormones, brain, etc.  Found out that your body loses a lot of healing power without your female hormones, hence the very rapid aging. Also found out that your estrogens and progesterone effect every single organ inluding thyroid.  My doctor has me on low dose of estrogen and progesterone and my wrinkles are disappearing so I'm hopeful :)  I also have a history of high cholesterol even before menopause.  You may want the doctor to check your thyroid as well.  Moisturizers, etc. weren't doing me ANY good either, just kept getting worse. I understand what these ladie are telling you about your cholesterol  but your body is already breaking down without your female hormones and possibly other things that menopause has caused to derail.  If you have or can have a doctor that is willing to thoroughly check you out, blood work, thyroid T3, T4, female hormones, iron, etc., that would be a starting point.  You don't want a doctor to throw you on a bunch of meds at once though as this can have advers side effects.  This is a one-step at a tme process.  I understand that we all have t age but aging gracefully is ideal

[MsDaisyee]

Are facial wrinkles so common and permanent that there is little hope to fix or improve?

[MsDaisyee]

I think I'm pretty up to date with my hairstyle but I've been thinking lately I want a style with more body.  Hands are another dead give away of age and mine are thin skinned with blue bulging veins.  My face and hands both show my age and then some,  my face is gaunt, and the lines on my face are getting deeper. Moisturizers aren't helping much.  

Yes, I agree, better low cholesterol then worrying about my face, This aging thing sneaked up on me so I am still trying to get use to it, with little success.

[AnnieBrooke]

Sweetheart, better low cholesterol than softer lines in the face.  :)  At least lines in the face can't make you die of a heart attack.

I'd go in for a good makeover -- colors, moisturizing makeup, and all.  And especially, the thing that instantly makes most women look younger is to get rid of the hairstyle one has been wearing for the last twenty years and put oneself into the hands of a more modern stylist.  Ditto fresh colors and silhouettes in the wardrobe.  

It's truly not the wrinkles that make cashiers give the senior discount, it's the signals, and the biggest signal of all is the style of hair.  Follow that with wardrobe and the bounce in one's step.  Only after that, does anyone focus on wrinkles.

[MsDaisyee]

Thank you Annie, at one point in my peri pause I was taking low dose estrogen and progesterone and my cholesterol and tyglycerides shot way up so the doctor immediately took me off.  However if I may say, while I was on it, it did make my face look more youthful and the lines softened and I was really pleased what it did for my face?

I noticed on the other post that they talk mostly about loose skin on the arms, what about loose skin or lines on the face?

[AnnieBrooke]

Here are two contradictory statements:

One does get used to wrinkles.  If you're unusually attached to staying young looking, it is not a bad psychological lesson to love the face you're in.

and

It is possible to take a light dose of estrogen, to keep up your sex life, skin tone, and heart.  

Talk to your doc.  If it is distressing you so much, see about taking a light estrogen/ progesterone regime unless something in your medical history contra-indicates it.