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22 with porn induced erectile dysfunction?

The first two times I tried to have sex I couldn't get an erection at all, one time was sober one drunk. Then the next girl was kind of a 3-night stand over a weekend with the only improvement being getting a half-erection and penetrating momentarily before it was too flaccid to go on.

Now, I've met the woman of my dreams, definite soul-mate and drop dead gorgeous...I ended up telling her about my past failures in intercourse and she joked it would happen with us but I was sure it wouldn't because theres a real connection with this girl, unlike the other two. And she's beautiful too, out of my league even...But sure enough the other night it was time and of course I couldn't get an erection...

I managed to get a decent halfer at first when the clothes started coming off and she grabbed around, but then it just wimped out and went away...

I've looked at internet porn since I was 12, now I'm 22, There have been times where the internet porn addiction got kind of bad, but it always mellowed out to calmer more normal routines, but always frequent. Sometimes I'd masturbate daily, multiple times daily, but then other times I'd go for a few days or so without any porn or masturbation.

Either way this girl is really cool and understanding and we talk about it openly with next to no embarrassment on my part anymore, I was going to see a doctor but then we decided it might be porn induced or psychological, and after that night I've written off all porn and I'm not masturbating again for a while.

My question I guess is was this enough for any of you? What was your porn addiction like in level of seriousness/frequency?

I'm hoping just abstaining from any kind of porn or sexual release for a while and only allowing myself to get off with her will work...If not I'll be crazy bummed...but I guess I'd go to a doctor...I'm just hoping porn has Temporarily (hopefully very temporarily) given me this problem and its on its way out very soon.

Any help or anything at all is appreciated, its kind of hard to talk about this stuff openly with your friends or "the dudes" and my girlfriend isn't knowledgeable or experienced in this...
453 Responses
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Avatar universal
here you go
http://manhood101.com/principles101.pdf
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Avatar universal
A related discussion, will i ever get hard again without looking at porn?? was started.
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Avatar universal
Look I'm a woman an I know just how hurtful a woman gets when her man is addicted to porn on internet. Makes a woman feel worthless and like she has done something wrong and all she wants is to be loves truthfully and all of you heart and soul!!!!
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Avatar universal
When abstaining from porn and masturbation, should I be trying to use my imagination to see if I *can* get hard?

Sorry for the typo.
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Avatar universal
I'm overly grateful for these posts. I'm 20 and it's been 5 days for me so far.

Woke up with a semi today which I'm proud of.

When abstaining from porn and masturbation, should I be trying to use my imagination to see if I get get hard? Or will it eventually happen naturally, where I'll have random thoughts or visuals that get me excited without being so conscious about it?

Please and thank you so much in advance!
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Avatar universal
my partner has ed we think due to his porn use prior to meeting its been over 8 months and still a struggle sometimes to have regular sex from a womans point of view this problem is demoralising and frustrating and confusing makes you feel like walking away.a truly horrible problem with no quick fix
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Avatar universal
hi, i'm posting this as a self confession, i suppose we all have to tell someone at some time to aid the process.

i'm 45 years old married, i've been in to masturbation from an early age, but it was always with soft porn and getting the odd peek up a girls skirt, that is until the dreaded internet made it so easy to look at very hard core porn, like many on here i've had to find more a more extreme things to get me off. as my marriage isnt really ever been based around sex i used the porn to fill a gap. however i've now met another lady who really wants me like ive never been wanted before. so im sort of trying to cure myself before i make a hash of making out with this new lady. now ur probably saying how do i know i have a problem, ive noticed a few things of late, went to a lap dancing club before xmas and although i was aroused the old man had different ideas, i have tried to have sex with my wife but again i can only get hard and orgasm if she hand jobs me... she puts it down to my age. this new lady invited me round to hers the other night, as i had watched porn twice that very morning again all the old man wanted to do was sleep. arrrrrrrrrrr so i've made my mind up i want to have proper relationships with actual women not pornstars .......

so as of friday i'm staying away from porn driven masturbation....hopefully this will help me start to feel real feelings instead of impossible situations that wud never be......

gud luck everyone

sid james
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Avatar universal
Hey guys, I'm back after 2 years of posting that I cured myself.
Guess what, you can fall back into the same thing.
I had stopped watching porn for 3 months and mentally trying to get off on only my girlfriend during that time. This pretty much cured me, but it did take 3 months and lots of will power.
After being able to have sex with my girlfriend for about a year, I told myself I could watch porn again and be unaffected. Slowly, over the years our sex became worse.
My GF of 4 years has now separated from me, no doubt because of this problem as a root, among other things.

DO NOT get cocky[haha] after being successful a few times. Stay away from the porn and live a normal, healthy life. I've abstained from porn over a month now, and hope to recover my normal sexual self, and my girlfriend.


In conclusion: Self inflicted ED is definitely curable, it just takes time and willpower. After curing yourself, it's also possible to fall back into disastrous habits.
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Avatar universal
go where?
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Avatar universal
It happens to the best of us. I had a one night stand with this gorgeous woman and I got it up for a minute. I think it was the mental block from using a condom. But then it happened when I didn't. Too much porn and not enough confidence. That fear of not performing makes you not perform. After you get thru that .... Then you can knock her boots . I know it's been 4 yeas since this thread started but still the issue comes up time to time. Less porn and build up ego. That's the answer.
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Avatar universal
I really like this forum, so I am gonna tell my last progress.
In April I managed to make 8 weeks of rebooting and my situation was really good. My mental and phisical health were amazing.
But In August I started watching porn and masturbating again.
Nowadays the situation is so bad that I masturbate 3 a day with porn.
That is why I am gonna make a 10 Weeks stop in order to cure this problem.
I will put here my progresses.
Regards
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Avatar universal
@jamesmoon...That's a helluva rat trap but seriously, what's wrong with you? Spell casting?! Lay off that shi.

@wickedsquirrel: With manual orgasms too much pressure is put on the penis, which would make vaginal intercourse not as pleasurable for you (in the long run) and thus weaken erections. As for oral....go for it! She can warm you up that way. If you get hardons from oral, then move on to vaginal. As for the one-month abstinence from sex...I don't see the point. You don't have to put your penis in her but you can stimulate her with mouth, fingers and toys, and make her satisfied anyway (if she has the need). And she can service you too. If during petting you feel the urge to put it in her, and everything works like a charm - you're cured!
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Avatar universal
I have been suffering from porn induced ED since I was 23. I started mastrabating when I was 13 and started using porn when I was 16. At 23 I had my first sexual experience with a girl, she started to give me oral sex and despite me not being nervous and being aroused mentally nothing happened at all, no erection and virtually no sensation. I then got hold of Cialis and took that the next time I had a sexual encounter, I got a very good erection with it, I had some sensation but I couldn't ejaculate at all however much she tried and I tried. I changed the way I mastrabated and after a while I managed to started ejaculating during sex. So everything seemed fine. Problem is, I have started to build up a tolerance to ED drugs. Recently I got up the courage to go see my doctor after having this problem for 7 years, I had a blood test and physical examination and everything came back normal, in fact better than normal, all my hormone levels are good and my free testosterone wasn't just fine it was in the high range of normal! So I started doing research and found out about porn induced ED. A few weeks ago I stopped watching porn altogether, stopped mastrabating to orgasm and I have talked to my girlfriend about it and we've agreed not to have intercourse for a month. The thing I have struggled with the most is that I still find myself mastrabating and fantasising, but not to orgasm. I have started to get some morning erections after 2 weeks which is encouraging.

I do have questions I'd like to ask if anyone can help. Would it damage my recovery if after a month I start having intercourse with my girlfriend?

Does anyone know if taking ED drugs like Cialis, Levitra and Viagra will slow or stop me recovering?

Will it slow or harm my recovery if my girlfriend gives me manual or oral orgasms?

Thanks guys and I hope this works!
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Avatar universal
L-arginine (typo)
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Avatar universal
Great post. I had a similar issue which I resolved by taking l-Argonne on a regular basis. It is a non prescription supplement you get in any drug store and helps with all round health. For ED you may need to up your dose but once your confidence builds you can stop altogether. It's a good thing to have as a back up plan but still good for you and inexpensive.

Good luck
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Avatar universal
I just came across this post, and I want to share my thoughts with the rest of you:

How on earth would having sex with your girlfriend delay progress?!?  THAT is the entire goal of this 'reboot' strategy; to experience a physical/mental/sexual connection with a real woman, sex with a woman only helps reinforce those normal feelings, and conditions your brain to become aroused during intercourse intstead of masterbation.  GO FOR IT!

Its important to remember that although there are some valid points here on the internet in relation to porn ED, take it with a grain of salt...most people are on here because they have some psychological (perhaps a few have physical) ED during intercourse and want to share mostly their problems.  Don't allow a victim mentality dominate the progress you are capable of acheiving in relatively short amount of time.  Just reading things like "reboot" can reinforce the idea that you won't be cured for months.....this is simply untrue.  Its all mental, if you are an free thinking person, empathetic, and open to new experiences....try your best to focus on the woman, FEEL all that is too feel good about sex with a woman, pay attention to the color of her skin, her breathing, her movements...and eventually you won't think, you will only exist in the moment, just like meditation.  If you exist in the moment and do what is natural, everything will resolve itself; trust me.  You all have the ability to overcome this problem much more rapidly than sites like yourbrainonporn have you think.

Take this from someone that used to masterbate in the "prone position," for over 10 years I read through all the sites about TMS and how it would take months to "retrain my brain" to masterbate the normal way.  After several failed attempts to do so, I relaxed one day...and just started stroking the normal way while thinking about only sexual fantasieis, NOTHING ELSE (ex. 'will i be able to masterbate normally).  Guess what?  I was able to masterbate normally in the span of 3 days not 3 months!

(I even had a bad reaction to a antibiotic once, went on the internet, read all the horror storries about 'years of recovery'.....then I stopped reading, relaxed, put my mind on other things...and within one month, I was no longer experiecing problems.  When you look for a problem, reinforce it by finding others with the same problem, and then collude on a rehabilition time  frame ....guess what, you've now conditioned your brain to accept that time frame and probably won't rehabiltate an earlier.  And remember, most people come on these types of forums with problems, you missing out on those with success stories because they don't come on here in the first place.  So take a deep breath, relax, and know that there are plenty of people that quickly changed this issue.)

I am 27 now, have only had sex a few times between 19-26 (because of religious beliefs, which I have decided to modify for a healthy sexual life).  I am in great shape, and am very attractive...but I too shared your problems.  I recently met a girl, I get hard even when I hold her hand, but the same thing happened when we tried to sleep together for the first couple times.  I knew this was all psychological, so to jumpstart my transition...I stopped porn/masterbation & took a small dose of cialus before the next time and was able to maintain the erection during....subsequently I was able to feel how good sex can be (and more importantly my self confidence skyrockted).  Just like switching masterbation methods, I wasn't used to this new form of pleasure....and after a few times I really started to enjoy and look forward to it (like trying beer the first few times when your a kid, or pot, etc.)  After a few times, I no longer needed the cialus and now enjoy @#$ing her whenever I want.  I'm not suggesting that you follow my method, but it helped ME get over anxiety, and allow myself to experience sex (condition my brain) for the great experience that it is.  If your a teenager, forget the taking pills, but if you're in your late twenties - 30's (or beyond)...it could help you get over that axiety 'hump' and on with your sex life.

So for God's sake, try to relax (meditate, pop a pill for the first few times, breath, whatever works for you) and just enjoy.  I know many muslim men that didn't have sex until they married in their 30's, and they too told me it was adjustment, but that it hardly took any time because their was nothing socially unnacepatble about not knowing what you're doing in that culture at the beggining.  Seriously, relax...if you can get hard from ANY other stimulus, you have the capability to get and maintain an erection with a naked woman.  This is ALL mental and the only thing holding you back from experiecing pleasure and a rock hard erection is the fear and anxiety of the unfamiliar.

Pray if thats your thing, think about all the other ****** up **** that exists in our world and how lucky we are to be so worried about this sort of problem, relax, and keep at it until you succeed.  If you've ever tried dancing (bachata, tango, etc.), you know damn well how nervous you are the first few times, and how much easier and enjoyable it becomes with just a LITTLE practice.  Relax, lay off the porn, and open yourself to enjoying sex....I'm positive its not going to take but a couple weeks if you open and allow yourself to change.
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Hey, is it fine to recall having sex with girlfriend in the progress of rebooting? Would it slow down my progress? Thanks in advance..
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Avatar universal
Hey Guys......Since we come here and post and talk about our progress.....maybe we should create a room for ourselves and actually become friends....maybe get to know one another....like a Rehab Center......where people not only get cured for their addiction....but by sharing the same experience they get to know one another deeply and close up....and actually some become best friends after they are done......believe me when i tell you....that a big part of our life wrecking habit comes from loneliness....not surrounded by friends, living alone maybe, alot of reasons come to my head....mine is the fact that i have lived alone for 8 years......and not to brag about myself alot...i am a sociable , interactive person , but people have sadly become so shallow and inconsiderate and nasty to each other...so at the end of the day....i decide that being alone is better than being with someone who will actually get me down instead of lift me up ........My Suggestion is....Maybe we should all introduce ourselves to each other....maybe add one another to our Facebooks.....post on each others walls....Laugh together....make time for each other....Help Support one another through our life changing phase.......this Comment may seem silly to some of u here im sure....but i only dream of being happy by killing this addiction we all have and i think together we might have a Big Chance. Thank You .........
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Avatar universal
Why not start with reducing masturbations to begin with? To maybe once a week. Then next time do 2 weeks of abstinence, then 3, and so on. I'm sure this would cause some to relapse to the old routines though. But for some a depression sets in after weeks of abstinence and this can screw up motivation to do anything.

I have been worried my libido and my erections would cease altogether if I abstain for too long, but we are programmed to have erections during sleep to keep the penis in shape. I know my libido is there, my mind tells me so, but my penis fail to get the message. A naked girl is not enough anymore, thanks to porn.
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Avatar universal
I started abstinence 3 weeks ago before I found this website because I was bored of porn..I'm worried and depressed since I found this website as I believe I'm suffering from porn-induced ED..I had my last erection while watching porn ..I worry I cannot recover..Is this normal to feel stress and depressed? And is this normal during rebooting my brain? Someone please help me..For your information, I will be having final exam after two weeks..
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Avatar universal
I have the same issue. Im 24 and addicted to porn for over 10 years. I tried having sex with many girls but it goes soft... I tried libegrow and it worked the first time but never again... When i masterbate i used the same routine and it hits different nerves then that of a women.  i read somewhere you can train your penis to enjoy a women ... Im just lost
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Avatar universal
hey man this happened to me once too. first time ever drunk/girl not really hot: hard to get an erection, couldnt lose my virginity. second time, sober, but with weird mental funk from the first: didnt work, couldnt lose virginity. second girl again after approx. 7-8 attempts finally got it in a good number of times but was still kinda flacid. third girl: same thing but got over it quicker approx 2 or 3 times then got some confidence. dated her for awhile and everythings been fine ever since. the first time with the last couple girls i dated was still rough just due to the past mental thing. but now im fine. i realized its just about not thinking, your body was made to do this with no brain just relax. that first time drunk thing is the trigger for limp ****. it was for me anyway. so just power through it. eventually you'll just be like **** it and get rock hard.
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Avatar universal
I was doing good for awhile without having any issues with ED. My confidence was back than I did what most addicts do I reverted back to porn and masturbation. I was still able to acheive an erection until recently.

Now I have to reboot my brain again. It is possible to reboot to your brain. It worked for me but the real problem is being able to stay away from porn.

My wife had a baby a year ago and her chest size went down. I don't know if that has anything to do with it b/c I am a breast man. Regardless, I know that porn and masturbation is the main problem.
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Avatar universal
8th day of no PMO. I think that's the longest abstinence in my entire adult life. There's a small urge but nothing overpowering. No erections, low libido. Lots of going to the gym. Girls check me out. More eye contact, more relaxed. But overall pretty anti-social.

I fantasize about pretty extreme stuff off-and-on during my penis enlargement exercises because I need a half-assed hard-on to do them. But my sexdrive is almost zero even when I see a nice butt. There's steam coming out of my ears but no reaction down there.
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