22 with porn induced erectile dysfunction?

The first two times I tried to have sex I couldn't get an erection at all, one time was sober one drunk. Then the next girl was kind of a 3-night stand over a weekend with the only improvement being getting a half-erection and penetrating momentarily before it was too flaccid to go on.

Now, I've met the woman of my dreams, definite soul-mate and drop dead gorgeous...I ended up telling her about my past failures in intercourse and she joked it would happen with us but I was sure it wouldn't because theres a real connection with this girl, unlike the other two. And she's beautiful too, out of my league even...But sure enough the other night it was time and of course I couldn't get an erection...

I managed to get a decent halfer at first when the clothes started coming off and she grabbed around, but then it just wimped out and went away...

I've looked at internet porn since I was 12, now I'm 22, There have been times where the internet porn addiction got kind of bad, but it always mellowed out to calmer more normal routines, but always frequent. Sometimes I'd masturbate daily, multiple times daily, but then other times I'd go for a few days or so without any porn or masturbation.

Either way this girl is really cool and understanding and we talk about it openly with next to no embarrassment on my part anymore, I was going to see a doctor but then we decided it might be porn induced or psychological, and after that night I've written off all porn and I'm not masturbating again for a while.

My question I guess is was this enough for any of you? What was your porn addiction like in level of seriousness/frequency?

I'm hoping just abstaining from any kind of porn or sexual release for a while and only allowing myself to get off with her will work...If not I'll be crazy bummed...but I guess I'd go to a doctor...I'm just hoping porn has Temporarily (hopefully very temporarily) given me this problem and its on its way out very soon.

Any help or anything at all is appreciated, its kind of hard to talk about this stuff openly with your friends or "the dudes" and my girlfriend isn't knowledgeable or experienced in this...

[smeghead]

are you saying you can get an erection from looking at porn but not when you are with a woman ?

22 is a bit young to have this problem

Is your penis normal size when flaccid ?

how long have you refrained from masturbating for ?

[bummed_out]

Yea, when I look at porn and can just keep browsing endless categories and stimulate myself I can get nice erections, but with a beautiful girl with whom I'm in love I can only get a half-erection that then fades away...

I've stopped masturbating for 4 days, since the morning of the incident.

[smeghead]

that is strange - what kind of porn are you interested in ?

I don't know about "porn" , I am more interested in "fetishes"  eg foot fetish


Is your girlfriend similar to the women in the porn you enjoy - could that be the problem ?

I suppose your willy may have got more used to the porn than the real thing

you could be unconsciously embarrassed by your porn interests and that stops you getting it up

I don't know what to suggest really

[bummed_out]

I think its just desensitization, It used to be just naked girls, then that got old then lesbians and so on, so now a beautiful woman naked on my bed I guess doesn't work despite my desires or intentions.

[Henry72]

I would think about "what it is that enters your thoughts when you loose your erection". You could be just lacking confidence.......perhaps fearful of not being able to perform. I would doubt that pornography has caused the problem. What about control.....That's the thing about lots of porn...your in control and there's no pressure... I doubt porn has caused the problem directly. I would go and see your GP. Erectile issues can really mess with your head (no pun intended). Lot's of blokes have a similar problem and he/she maybe able to help. I have had a similar experience in my 20's and i did nothing about it. Now i'm in my 30's and have sought help. Your GP will be able to sort out whether the issue is Psychological or physical. I have used Viagra /Cialis etc and find they often take the pressure off worrying about getting aroused and staying that way..... Problem with using them is if you have no physical reason for needing them and it's more in your head....than you can become dependendant on needing them to have sex and a) their expensive and b) they don't really deal with your confidence issue....

Anyway hope that helps

[smeghead]

you are lucky to have a beautiful woman naked on your bed

no chance of that for me

will she be bothered if you can't get it up long term ?

you could try zinc and maca also l-arginine

[Lotsadrome]

Man it sounds a lot like me. I'm 28 though. I typed a couple paragraphs on here for you but it got erased and dont' feel like typing it out again. If you are still interested in what I had to say I'll type it again. How has the porn-abstinence been going? Is it working?

[freakrojja4]

Hi mate,,,,,,,,,,,I'm facing the same issue,,,,,,,,,,,I think we shouls stop watching porn,,,,,,,,,,,It's very dangerous,,,,,,,,,Take care mate<<<<<,,,,,,,,, No other way out,,,,,,,May God help us

[freakrojja4]

Hi mate,,,,,,,,,,,I'm facing the same issue,,,,,,,,,,,I think we should stop watching porn,,,,,,,,,,,It's very dangerous,,,,,,,,,Take care mate<<<<<,,,,,,,,, No other way out,,,,,,,May God help us

[Beargizmo]

I went through 5 year self induced 'dry spell' after the end of a relationship.  I wound up viewing a lot of porn and masturbating quite a bit.  Then, I met the woman who ultimately became my 2nd wife and found I had a similar problem.  Finally was able to get an erection and maintain it, then was unable to climax..thanks to her patience and assistance we got through that..and I was in my late 40s then..

Lay off the porn..keep your hand off your johnson..spend time with your girlfriend just "enjoying" being with each other.  after a few days take a nice bath together..soap each other up, relax, etc..give it some time and "it" will come around.  Your body is just used to a different stimulation and the feel of the grip of your hand on your "boy"..relax, and quit worrying about it and give it some time

Jim

[BananaJoe]

Hi guys,
I've got the exact same problem:
Met a new hot girl, but I can't get it up. I have no problem while using porn. Has anybody made experiences how long it will take to get over that?

(btw: I'm 26 and in good shape, so I'm sure it is the porn why it's not working with a real girl..)

[Lonnie51]

Here's my theory:  You associate porn with something bad, dirty, forbidden, etc. and that excites you, so you get a hard on.  But this girl is pure, special, everything porn is not, so if you associate her with a hard on, you would be associating her with porn, which you probably don't want to do.  Subconsciously you are protecting her from the former "bad" you and all that "bad" porn excitement.  You need to remind yourself that love is beautiful and that includes the sex that accompanies love.  It can't be bad.  I think most people respond to porn because we are mortal human beings and we really can't prevent our physical reactions to something sexually arousing. It's normal.  Love is special and we respond to that too. I'm sure you're a good person and if you really love this girl, you could never hurt her.  

[rankett]

> Has anybody made experiences how long it will take to get over that?

I think this depends on the individual. We are not all the same. I would say for starters try to abstain for at least one month from both porn and real sex. Well, the second is probably difficult but my suggestion is to try both. Developing some other activities often helps to draw attention and energy elsewhere and, consequently, to achieve abstinence more easily. Don't give up (for the porn part) if you don't see improvement. You probably need more time, which would be not surprising at all. And don't forget: porn can easily ***intoxicate*** human mind.

[Seeking_the_Answer]

Hey man, Ive just read your thread, I know its been a while since you posted it. When I was a teenager I too would try to have sex with my girlfriend, it didnt work. She to was beautiful and eventually left me for it, I hope your girl is more understanding. I was molested as a young boy of 9 or 10, and was taught how to masterbate. I masterbateed daily from the time I was 11 to 18, I also watched porn pretty often. The only thing I can really think of, is first of all I got used to manual stimulation erections, before I was really even able to get erections. I only remember a couple of times when I got an unaided erection good enough for sex, but unfortunately there was no girl around. I took a break from masterbating (masturbating) for a while and eventhough I have other problems now, I seem to be more Interested in actually having sex than before. My theory is basically you have to train your body and mind. Wait as long as you can between masterbation (masturbation) sessions, and when you cant hold off anymore, try to think about you and your partner in a real sexual situation. Also try to focus more on what your doing, concentrate and relax. I am 23 years and sex is no longer a big part of my life, I simply dont need sex or a woman in life and really consider them both a terrible burdon. You can focus your energy on other things, I know its hard to not be pressured to have sex in this world, but sleeping with a woman who is not your wife is not morally correct anyway. I do not want to offend, but Jesus says, Those whom I love I rebuke and discipline so be earnest and repent. So no matter what you do in life, give it your all. If a man does his best what else is there. Good luck

[BananaJoe]

Hi guys,

just wanted to let you know I have overcome my problem.
Now after two months the urge of watching porn has mostly gone.
I'm masturbating 2-3 times a week (before I did up to 15 times..)
I'm in good shape, stopped smoking, reduced drinking, and exercise 3 times a week.

I can get a hard on even by just looking at a hot girl in college/ in the mall, and it feels great! And sex with my fu..buddy is great.

Just wanted to let you know: if you are willing to overcome this problem /addiction with porn, you can do it. It's not easy, but it's worth it!

[Aaron2468]

Does anyone know if its possible to incress the girth or length of your penis without surgery?

[Stellios]

Hey dude, just wanted to ask if your still doing ok, and how long did it take till you noticed any effect with your penis?  I think I have the same problem that you had, as I cant get it up without any physical stimulus at all anymore, no natural erections.  Even when I see a smoking hot girl, my brain knows shes hot, but my penis is just dead.  I'm convinced it's been the porn that's done it as i've been masturbating ever since like 12 and never had much success with the ladies till now.  I've stopped masturbating, started jogging/weights, hoping i'll get it back into shape, as I think my penis has just gotten used to having a hand around it, and/or i've just abused it so much its desensatized.  It's been 5 days off the porn etc so far.  Taking one zinc tablet (15mg) each day hoping that will help too.  I really need to get this fixed, my girlfriend is so understandable about it, but we can't have any sex because of it.  Mucho annoyed.  A doctor just laughed in my face about it the other day, and just said its because im getting old, even though i'm only 23!!!

Hope you/anyone can help.

Cheers

[Stellios]

Any progress with you bummed_out?  Has anyone got anymore success stories, and how they achieved it?

Thanks

[BananaJoe]

Hi Stellios,
I needed 1-2 weeks of total abstinence until my spontaneous erections came back, and after the same time I had no problems anymore with my fuckbuddy.

The only thing that is left is that I sometimes just can't come. But my FB likes that I can go on and on. Usually this happens if I have sex more than twice a day. Everything else is like it was before.

So, in summary I'd say that if you have the discipline to stop watching porn, you'll get back to where you were within 1-3 weeks. Masturbation is ok sometimes, but leave the porn away.

Stellios, I'm sure you'll get over that!


Good Luck and let us know how it works out for you!

[Stellios]

Thanks for the reply BananaJoe, much appreciated dude! Will post soon with an update.

Cheers

Stellios

[mowdabyke]

I've been looking at porn since I was 9. I'm 21 now. Its only during the last year, once I started to get seriously sexually active that I realized I had an ED problem.

After going through the requisite freaking out about how I was too young to have ED and embarrassment when I couldn't just pop up and go the way guys my age are supposed to be able to, I began to suspect there was some connection to porn. I have no problems when watching porn, but I'm dead when it comes to me being with my girl friend. And I love her.

It is scary how little awareness there is on the net that ED caused by too much porn is a very real problem. It's not about us lacking confidence, or being uneasy around our lovers, I truly believe its all about desensitization. Although my heart and soul are in my lover, she just can't physically arouse me. She can't compete, no girl can ever compete, with the endless sexual visual fiction porn offers.

So, after reading through a lot of similar stories on medhelp, i've decided to give up porn and hope that my penis starts functioning normally, with the girl I love, and not with meaningless fantasies online.

BananaJoe, your story is truly a source of faith for me that my problems can be worked out. It's been 3 days since I've been off porn, and will be visiting my girlfriend at her home in Colorado in three weeks. I hope years and years of visual desensitization and addiction aren't going to destroy my chance to ever have a normal sex life.


Ps - I think we really owe a round of thanks to the wonderful women in our lives who have stood by us while we face our worst fears and wrangle with this debilitating embarrassment. I hope for all of you to have a supportive girl in your life as I do.

[iwasneverhere]

yeah same thing happened to me...

laid off the porn for 2 days and it solved the problem...

but porn was never really the problem...it was HOW i jerked off to porn...

you have to learn to jerk off with less and less use of ur hands, more control of ur mental stimulation and more use of ur imagination...

if you think about it porn and sex are practically the same thing...
but when u jerk off to porn ur hand is doing all the work, and in sex ur penis has to do the work...

if you want to stop porn, u can stop, but dont stop masturbating...
u have to learn to masturbate using ur imagination and as little help from your hands as possible...

DO NOT STOP THINKING ABOUT SEX....the aim is to get hornier...
practice makes perfect...

its like learning to ride a bike...first u had training wheels (when u used ur own hands and watched porn) now u should take the training wheels off and if u keep falling down u keep trying again(but WITHOUT the training wheels)

in the meantime to satisfy ur girlfriends there are stuff u can do for them that can make up for ur erectile dysfunction...and who knows maybe when u do that stuff u'll get so horny ur penis will want to join in on the fun...

u'll get it...everyone does eventually...no one has a penis that just "doesn't work"...and i dont care if u've been watching porn for 100years, ur not gonna be sexually retarded for life...as long as UR HAND can do it, YOU CAN do it too...

[MrGeekhead]

Thank you all!!

I've been in a total desperation and depression for almost a year!! From when I failed in a real situation.

Now I know the cause of my problems for sure!

-Jerking off for a long time (>4 years)
-Watching dirtier and dirtier porn to get it up (starting with pictures of girls)
-Hitting the old man harder and harder in a crazy, non natural way

All this applies to me!

I've even visited two urologists who both said I was totally healthy. I did not belive them. There had to be something wrong physically! Now, I know they were right!

I hope I heal soon!

[BananaJoe]

Hi MrGeekhead,

I'm sure within 1-2 weeks your body will relearn normal sexual response if you see a hot girl. It will take some willpower, but its definitely worth it!

Wish you the best,
Banana

[MrGeekhead]

Thanks man! You cheer me up.

I will report my progress.

I'm 25 BTW.

[stevo29]

I been masturbatin to porn since i was 12 im 21 also just like all these stories i read, ive also been in and out of jail ive done 2 years. 2 weeks here, 3 months there, 6 months here, on and off.  I just recently caught herpes from eating a couple girls out on their periods.  sso it makes some people stupid you dont use your whole brain it intoxicates your brain this stuff is ok as long as you plan on living in a place for intoxicated brains. a porno world! My advice is to try stopping jerking off to porn. Its not going to work if youve been doing it as long as me or mowdabyke.  But try if it dont work dont keep trying and shooting yourself for it. Just put yourself somewheres that you cant have it like a psych ward. or 6 feet under. Or you could always find a girlfriend who supports you , i dont think thats very practical though u need lots of people who support you not just one girl (maybe being homeless for a while is the answer)

My problem is i wake up in the morning so depressed im not with a hott girl that i have to masturbate to porn 1st thing in the morning! Or I just go back to sleep because I know that after I Jerk off I won't get anything done that day, Ill end up more and more depressed I need help Im close to going back to prison or being homeless because its gotten me to a point where i Don't care about anything.  My penis is very small because of this addiction there is no way out its hopeless drugs porn and death i should write a book! I think building a treehouse and cutting all ties and living out in the woods is a good idea!

[propeciauser]

I am 24 and I've been having low sex drive for about 18 months now. Im still unsure if this has been caused by a drug for hair loss called Propecia (finasteride), because lowered sex drive is a side effect of this drug. However, I stopped propecia 18 months ago, and my sex drive is still worse than ever.

After seeing a bunch of doctors and doing blood tests, all doctors have said I am healthy and that this is psychological. Before my sex drive disappeared, I was the horniest person on earth. I was masturbating at least twice a day, and having sex with women was never a problem.

I never preferred porn to real sex, but I would spend hours everyday watching porn. Even then I could ejaculate and have sex multiple times a day. I've been watching porn since I was like 12.

However, I noticed I started having erectile problems and low sex drive when having sex with my girlfriend at that time back in summer 2007. I immediately blamed the propecia drug, but doctors couldnt find anything hormonally or physically wrong.

Since then, I have found many claims that porn can desensitize you. Although porn had never affected my sex drive and performance with real women for all my life, I noticed I was watching increasingly graphic porn to get aroused. They call this "escalation" for porn addicts. I never once thought that too much porn could be unhealthy or lower my threshold for becoming aroused until I read all these stories of porn overuse.

Im still unsure whether the Propecia drug has affected me, but I have completely cut out porn from my life (stopped watching 2 weeks ago).

I feel like one clue that my problem may be physical is that since I lost my sex drive, I have also lost my normal morning erections (I used to get morning erections everyday of my life until June 2007 when my sex drive disappeared). Every guy is different when it comes to morning erections, but I know I personally used to get one everyday until this started happening.

So, my question for you guys is this: when you started noticing sexual dysfunction, did you notice any loss in your morning erections?

[calikid916]

To Bananna Joe and IWasNeverHere,
You 2 are totally right AND Inspired me ! Seriously. I had the same issue. Had no problems getting hard off porn but when it came to sex with a woman I would go limp after a few minutes. 1. Masturbating to porn everyday for several years is part of the problem. 2. Like Iwasneverhere said , Its not just watching porn its HOW you masturbate. The grip of your fingers wrapped tight is much more intense then having a condom on and sliding in and out a nice soft Vagina. Over years of masturbation I became acustom to my hands and the Soft vagina just wasnt doing it for me.  I orginally stopped masturbation for a week. After just a few days I was getting spontaneous erections again. When I do masturbate I try to keep it down to once a day and use as little pressure from my hands as I can so I dont train my Penis into its old ways. Yesterday I had my 1st orgasm/longtime errection in a woman with condom since ... 5-6 months. So to all those readers out there down get down on yourself like I did. Just quit the porn and masturbation for a couple weeks. And if you do make it short and sweet. Dont masturbate with an erection to porn for over 5-10 Min or it may effect you like ifeffected me!  - GL to all of you and God speed!

[desdes81]

I'm having exactly the same problem and it happened to me tonight. I met a girl in the park i talk to her and everything was alright she was good looking but i wasnt feeling her but like i said she was good looking its just that i'm picky but everything was so smooth that she invited me to her house so i said ok and it was my first time that i was about to have sex. So when we were on her bed i said to my self that like most guys who's having sex for the first time i will probably ejaculate prematuraly but after that i will be ok. And when she start giving me a ******** i just couldn't get an erection so i had to tell her that i was just too nervous but i know it wasn't that cause i wasn't scare or anything it just i saw her breast and since i wasn't into her at the begining it was probably that. But then i start thinking maybe it's all the porn that i watch since i'm 13 now i'm 22 and i always watch nice girls with huge breast and she wasn't like those girls so i really think it's that. The funny part it's that i almost ask her if she had some porn so i can get hard. After reading all your comments i do think it's also the way i mastubate so now i will lay off this "gift and curse" that we call porn for a while and try to be in love with every kind of girl big or slim breast or no breast pretty or ugly blond hair or black hair. I'll try this method and try to get with a girl and i will give news to say if it worked

[BustedBoy]

After reading posts like these I finally decided about a month ago that i would give up porn once and for all.... TOTALLY... I'm thinkin that watchin porn when u have a girl around that loves u loads is like cheating on her.... so i went off it totally and i've been off it for over a month....I really love my new girlfriend ....and she really loves me.... conversation on the phone at night (Nothing erotic) keeps me away from the porn i'd have been watchin at that hour.... bein with her is so much fun!!!!

So I wanted to give her birthday sex but in the middle of foreplay it went limp once again.... and I bust out the fingers to finish the business! It's gonna get lame soon.... I know.... why can't I get it up even though I went off the porn???!?!  I masturbated 2 days ago after a break of over a month without porn  and i used my imagination after a really REALLY long time.... it felt great.... but my erection was so half -assed!  It kept fallin flat when left unstimulated for more than 5 seconds.... but I climaxed and climaxed good.... with her on my mind... that's good right???

Also, what's worse is that I have almost totally stopped gettin random erections during the day since I stopped watching porn and masturbating frequently.... my penis feels kind of lifeless... i can feel it... and Since 2 weeks ago or so the morning erections have stopped too.... i wake up with a flacid penis and feel SOOOOOO frustrated that i try massaging it juss to see it get up.... even after the massage it's not fully up n falls flat in a couple of seconds.... the head and the front area are quite hard but the bottom of the shaft is really weak....this never used to happen.... I ALWAYS used to wake up with wood.... so much so that if i was sleepin in the same room as some other person I'd have to wait it out before I get out of bed.... what the hell is happening????  Is it some sort of withdrawal symptom???  Has this happened to anyone else?  Does anyone know how to put life back in it???  Suppelements, etc? .... I'm only 24, I don't smoke, I drink only one night or 2 nights a week, I work out 2-3 times a day and ride a bicycle at least 4 KMs a day.... pretty briskly too.... I think I'm in top shape but I haven't had my blood tested for the usual levels in a long time.... Please help me.... I have a girlfriend that I really love and i really don't wanna disappoint her....

[limpbisquet]

Well I'm older than you guys 48 and I am diabetic..
But I have been a stud all my life...not a big **** but rock hard and after it everyday. I either had sex or masterbated everyday since I was 14...
Even when I was 40 I'd have a woody so hard I couldn't pee in the toilet..I'd have to count backwards from 100 till it went down.
Then I got a laptop..watching porn everyday masterbating (masturbating) one or twice a day...then one day I went limp on my sexy wife...then again....due to work we spent 6 months apart lots of porn...now I get hardly any night woodies and when I masterbate my **** is half limp...or less..without viagra I doubt I could get it up with my wife...
I know diabetes causes ed..but I am in shape lift, run, and have no other problems...My balls are used to cumming everyday...but the **** is limp...I am addicted to porn...I now believe the combination of porn and overmasterbation has caused this rather than diabetes...I have only been able to cut back to 5 times a weeks..no improvement...I have decided after reading this thread i am not alone...Has anyone found any success in quiting porn and getting it back? Banana Joe more info...I am going to quit porn and try to cut back to once a week see what happens.Help!  Has anyone beat this!

[Spite]

I'm totally desensitized by porn. I use to masterbate for hours and not *** to try to go longer during sex. Now I can't seem to get it up when with a real girl. But I can masterbate to porn and get a super hard erection anytime. I even *** pretty fast.
When I'm with a girl, I can't seem to get enough stimulation to *** from oral and my penis doesn't seem to stay hard long enough to satisfy.
I am sure that I have watched to much porn and have decided to stop. I will also take viagra in small amounts daily to help boost my confidence. Also will stop smoking and drinking. I will also masterbate using no visual aid and using a little pressure as possible from my hand with lots of lube...although it may take me forever to *** if at all.
After doing this a for so long, I will report back and let you guys know if there is hope. If i don't have any good news after making all these changes, that will totally suck

[ttt100]

Hi! I hope that your strategy give you some positive effects!!! I'm in the same boat. Normal intercourse don't excite me so much + lack of penile pleasure and ed :( , this is really terrifying... We're all waiting for results!!! / (sorry for my english)

[guggu]

Hi i have like lets say the same problem. Im 32 male and watch porn everyday and maturbate as well. My wife is not very good in sex but i always use to have a good erection. About three weeks ago i had a one night stand with a lady and was very nice u since then i am having a problem having a hard one when i try and have sex with my wife. Can anybody help pls>

[naijaboy]

Im assuming that since you had sex with another woman outside of your marriage (which must have been better for you) your interest in sex with your wife has gone down hill. I used to have ED problems and the things I noticed that made a difference were
1. new girl
2. staying away from porn for a few day before sex
3. THINKING ABOUT THE THINGS THAT TURN YOU ON ABOUT THE PERSON YOU ARE LOOKING TO HAVE SEX WITH
4. Masturbating on the phone with the girl on the other line
5. feeling confident that I can have sex with anyone and that I can do it well
6. Opening the condom and placing it on the table beside the bed until you are completely turned on
7. Getting head before actual intercourse
Those are the major changes I made. It took me 3 different girls and 1 year to get through this. I know what yall are going through but I know that more than likely it will go away in time. Be confident in yourself. Try some of the steps especially staying away from porn for a few days before sex. I think I stopped for 3 or 4 days before my first time and made the girl I wanted to have sex with my porn.

good luck

[naijaboy]

Also try and reduce the amount of stress you're under, get enough sleep and definitely take multi vitamins from all the stuff you lost from masturbating. By the time I was able to get things working for me I was done with finals and summer had just started. I was getting alot of sleep and chillin. Make sure you feel really comfortable with the girl too. The first time I met the girl I was able to have sex with she took me to victoria's secret and told me to pick something out for her.

And when you do try DO NOT GIVE UP!!! the first time I tried with this girl my **** wasnt sure what to do. I was able to get hard, put the condom on and got in. Right when I got in I got soft again. Luckily I had told the girl my situation beforehand and she was just as determined to have sex with me as i was with her. She told me to keep going and I did. I had no idea what I was doing but I didnt care anymore. She gave me a smile and the next thing you know I was hard AND MADE HER *** 5 TIMES THAT NIGHT. This was my first time actually having real sex with a girl. YOU ALL HAVE IT IN YOU!!! NEVER GIVE UP!!!

[TheDOC43]

I'm 27 years old  and have been dealing with this problem since the age of 24. It's funny how this condition can gradually set in. I challenge each of you to attempt to discover when the condition first showed its colors. Many of you will be tempted to say "well when I was with this person I was unable to perform". but if you look a deeper you may notice that the condition began to set in way earlier than that.

I understand better than most what it's like being young and living with ED. After my "recognizing stage", you know when the weight of the world seems comes down on you and crushes you like a  bug.....I began to think in a more constructive maner.  

First, the natuaral course of action is to read online and learn everything you can about ED (causes, possible cures, etc.). Next, I visited multiple general practitioners and noticed that they were generally ignorant regarding this condition. Their knowledge was limited and knew only what their Cialis, Levitra, and Viagra reps had taught them (a bit bias to say the least). I took the pills and generally had the same problem and began to grow really concerned that a solution may not exist me. Me, being the bulheaded "never take no for an answer" son-of-a-***** that I am, decided to take this a step further and fully explore my medical state. I had blood work ran (testosterone levels, cholesteral, hormones, etc), I personally paid for a CatScan of my pelvic region to ensure blood flow was normal and sufficient. I had a Urologist perform Doppler Testing on my penis and took every natural herb in the book. Guess what the result was?? .........HEALTHY and FINE!!

After ruling out physical conditions, I proceeded to the next logical step. I engaged in psych examination with a physician from Dartmouth for three months. Physch evauluation is tough because you never know when it's finished and it's very expensive. I soon ran out of money and had to stop my evaluations. It's now a year later.....and I'm still dealing with the condition.

Long story short....."I feel your pain man". The real issue sourrounding ED is that once you've experienced it you may be destined to remember it for a while. This means that when you engage in sexual activity you're mind snaps into the past and remembers what happened before. This causes a small amount of anxiety and causes your corpus muscles in your penis to restrict blood flow and leaves your noodle limp.

Good news.....I've began new work and my carear is really taking off. After years, I've trained my mind to not focus on the issue. This is tough because lets face it..without the ability to reproduce you feel worthless not only as a man, but also a human being (women who have similar female problems feel the same). This process of reducing stresses in my life in association with maintaing good health has helped me regain control of my erections exponentially. Their not perfect, but have vastly improved. Like many of these posters, I have watched porn for 12-13 years and masterbated like a champ. My next stage is to cut out the porn and see how resensitization effects my performance.

Thanks for your posts, they've helped! I truley believe if you continue to work towards a resolution and don't spend your days moping you will find peace! Remeber....healthy body, helathy mind, healthy spirit = healthy results!

[sweetcherrygirl]

Hi,

I had sex with a 40 year old man who I spoke as if he wanted to **** every hot woman around.  I went to his place to have sex with him after meeting him in a parking lot where he kissed me and told me all about how he wanted to have oral sex with me.  He seemed really horny then but when I arrived to do it with him that night, he lost his erection.  I gave him a ******** and he did get it back up and came.  However, the next time we did it again and he went limp in the middle of things.  I was kind of shocked but I now I think his problem lies in stress and too much masturbation.  Personally, I know that it is also hard for me to *** during sex because I use a high powered dildo that I am fond of.  I am going to talk to him about porn and try to quit the high power tools to see if it works for me too.  Hopefully, things will get better for us both...I will let you know...Keep positive and don't watch porn...I don't want to become addicted...I find fantasies much better and more intimate...thanks guys for being so honest...:)

[Mr_Splooge]

Wow, I'm really glad to have found this Forum.  I, too, am a porn addict.  I actually started extremely early, around the age of five.  It first started from me somehow getting turned on by women on just regular television.  Ginger from Gilligans Island, the blond chick from Three's Company, just any hott looking girls from television.  I don't even think I had an erection at 5; I would just rub on the bed and *** a little load.  Then, throughout the years, late night cinemax with the softcore porn got me through my days.  I got to see boobs!!!  After that, when I first was introduced to real porn I was about 16 and I couldn't even believe what was going on!!  They were really having intercourse.  I suddenly got a supercharged hard on from the image of hardcore porn.  I could never go back to softcore, it's not enough.  Now years passed, and I was pretty much masturbating everyday from video rentals and internet porn.  Now that porn is so easily accessed I see the escalation of my preference.  I am no longer aroused by one on one sex, it has to be an orgy or gangbang or *** on the face.  Whats scary is, guys pissing in chicks mouths got my pants to move.  I think it's time to stop!!!!

Anyway, it has always crossed my mind that porn and even television in general has had a great impact on my erectile dysfunction.  I'm 28 now and even still suffer from the  problem.  And yes, it's because I'm still addicted to porn.  It's hard to stop, especially with the new free porn sites available.  But don't get me wrong, I've had sexual encounters with plenty of women; and some of them, I've failed to plow my **** in their vagina unless I use viagra.  And some, i've pleasured really well orally or with my fingers.  However, I'm really disappointed that I have a hard time finishing inside.  I would either get flacid really quick, or when using viagra, stay hard forever and never finish.  I feel bad because the girl sometimes think it's them even when they're super hott.  I feel like I'm psychologically damaging them and myself.  I'm even afraid I can't have any kids because of it.   Anyway, I'm glad to find this forum and hope we can all get through it together.  Then maybe in the future we can get our girls and make our own orgy. haha

[sugardaddy09]

wow I this cause is not mentioned anywhere on any ED information sites. I am pretty certain this is my problem exactly.. I am going to quit porn and batting off for 2 weeks and see how that goes. I dont think any of you guys should worry, im 23 and having these issues.. we cant all have physical issues.. its definetly the porn!!! Be strong with your will power to stop!!

[cckap1994]

Please see my question under "Loss of arousal before sex". I'm 34 years old and did watch porn a lot.

[archaen]

any updates?

anyone else overcome this?

[AUMugg]

I am a 59 year old male and about 18 months ago had TURP surgery (no cancer just enlargement)and since then my erections are only half-assed.    I have tried all three of the ed meds and just started on Viagra.    I have a hard time getting a decent erection so I and my wife to be can have intercourse, and more times than not it doesn't last.    What can I do?   I find this very depressing.  She says it isn't a big deal, but to me intamacy in marriage is very important.   Is a pump a possible solution as I am going to go back to see my urologist.   I have not had a Testosterone test and that may be part of the issue - Low T....help....getting married in less than a week.

[Midsideboss]

Thank you all so much for posting your experiences, I have had the same experience with watching porn and the continuous masturbation for like over 13 years. Previously I was a virgin up to the age of 23, when I first tried to have sex and couldnt keep it up it's like I just lost interest. Spontaneous erections were a thing of the past but I however could get them while watching porn. To remain hard I had to keep stimulating myself and I even found that regular porn was gettin boring. I recently tried to stop watching porn and I realised a vast difference. Porn does desensitise you and when you get to the real thing it isnt as facinating.
I think masturbation is good in moderation, but masturbation and porn is dangerous in the long run. Thing is I only really realised this from reading all your experiences thank you so much for sharing and I am planning to stop the porn all together.

[rman144]

I'm 19 and went through the exact same thing. I've been in the position of feeling hopeless or wondering if anything will work; however, I'd like to make a few recommendations that have helped me:
1. Stop watching porn (occasional masturbation is fine, but the use of porn while doing so is counterproductive; if you retrain your mind to get hard without watching porn, you'd be shocked at how much it will improve your erections while with women in person).
2. If you masturbate, use lighter touching and stimulation; after I watched porn for 7 years, I didn't realize how rough I was on myself until I started to take a break here and there.
3. Be patient; it took me one month of not watching porn for my mind to start returning to normal and to have stimulation without watching hardcore porn; another two weeks before I started to notice my erections improving (Well worth the wait).
4. Relax; if you only think about not getting an erection, you won't get an erection. Try to masturbate when you are feeling relaxed and bored, not as a way to cope with stress; doing so is only going to perpetuate a sense of hopelessness.

Hope this helps guys.

[woland]

Hi guys,
Same story. 100%. Went to see a urologist and everything, thought there was something wrong with me. Levels were fine, I'm really healthy, exercise loads, generally feel very good about my physical appearance, however maybe a few of you also suffer from a slight lack of self esteem? No good reason for it, maybe a thing from my childhood. Who knows. I think it's a factor for me.
Anyway I never really managed to have proper free flowing sex with a girl until recently (I'm 30).
Thought I'd share a couple of things that helped me:
Very nice girl I was dating, was having trouble with the whole staying hard shabang... well I abstinated from watching porn and didnt masturbate for over a week until the next time I saw her, and popped half a viagra when we got back to my place. I was like a flippin raging bull. Afterwards it really gave me much more confidence around her and next time I saw her I didnt need anything and we had a great time again. You dont want to get dependent on it, but if you have self-control, as a confidence booster I think it's a winner.
Also if you are having trouble getting off from sex I would also recommend shopping online for some special ultra thin condoms, they really help - I'm so proud of the beauties I found via my research that I almost look forward to slipping one on now rather than fiddling around with the packet in a very moment-killing way.
Hope this helps guys, by the way I am never watching that scourgeful porn ever again (although there are still some scorching scenes in my head that I doubt will ever leave me).
Good luck

[GeorgeClinton]

I was getting really frustrated thinking that no one was going through what I am going through right now - you all have NO IDEA how reassuring this thread is.

I'm a healthy attractive 24 year old male and have been masturbating and watching porn since I was 11 or 12. I'm a pastor's son so sex was always taboo, and spent my early adolescence developing this horrible habit of repression through pornography.

I lost my virginity at 17 but never got a chance to really overcome my problem. The first time I tried to have sex NOTHING happened. I had no idea why. Then it happened with the next girl, and the next, and the next, all the way to the present when its still happening. I did make small strides with each girl, but have only really had complete sex once.

I decided to see a sex therapist who told me the same things: stop watching porn, use lube so my grip isnt as tight, start fantasizing instead of being visually stimulated. I believe that it just takes extreme mental toughness to overcome this - to first change your habit, and then when it comes down to sex to be totally comfortable and not dwelling on the past.

Sometimes I feel like failure is so ingrained in my sexual past, that it's impossible not to expect it. But seriously this thread has motivated me and like others have said, no matter how long it takes you can't let it beat you because the reward is worth it.

If anyone has any progress or more tips please post, and hopefully my next post will be after succeeding.

[saja927]

I'm 27 and I started having problems a couple years ago.  I narrowed it down to smoking and porn, as everything else in my body was perfectly healthy.

At first I could only have sex with the help of the pill, but then after maybe 1-2 months of no smoking/nicotine patches and no porn I managed to not need it, and haven't used it ever since.

I'm not totally sure what the exact reason was, but I'm damned sure that using the nicotine patches to quit coupled with an intense desire to have normal sex again was at least a part of it, and getting away from the porn as well.

Getting away from porn was actually more difficult, as I've caved into that more than smoking over the past 8 months.  I'd recommend keeping your hands away from your jimmie unless necessary.  It helped me reduce my urges a lot, and it makes perfect sense that if you're just sitting around and you got your hand down there eventually you're gonna be stimulated.

I will admit that I masturbated, but without the porn and with try to not constantly have my hands grabbing my **** I kept it down to a few times a week instead of a few times a day.

Anyways, hope this helps.  There's definitely hope, even if you feel like you're screwed.  I made the changes in my life, gave them time to develop (you know, actually, maybe it took 3 months to actually kick in) and now I'm perfectly healthy from a sexual standpoint, and my girlfriend's loving it.  Don't give up, things can only get better from here on out if you make the effort.

[GeorgeClinton]

I haven't watched any porn since my last post and have masturbated only occasionally, while using my imagination.

I took a 5mg Cialis the other night (even though I was pretty confident that I didn't need it) when I was hanging out with my fb and it actually worked.

After just that one time I'm getting more morning wood and spontaneous erections.

No matter how difficult it might seem, just know that you're on the right track if you put in the effort, but most of all you have to WANT to succeed. If the will is strong then you will definitely get what you want.

Good luck everyone!

[troubledjohnson]

I am 46 years old.  I have been with my wife since I was 17.  Sex has always been No issue for me.  I could have sex anytime I wanted.  Well in the last three time I could not finish and I have notice that my erections have not been has hard for a while.   Having two kids has been a challenge and because my wife and I can not get together I just masturbated.   I have been looking at porn since I was 13. I have been looking and much more graphic for a while.  So after reading this post I will delete my porn collection and stop watching porn and see if it helps out.   I will try to post back...

TroubledJohnson

[dondi203]

Very similar problem, but I'll throw another wrinkle in there. I am the same, have no problem masturbating to porno, but when I have a girl in my bed nothing works. For example, last night I had dinner with a very attractive girl then came back and was making out with her and I was aroused. Next thing you know we get down to business and NOTHING. I was mortified and the girl could tell so in turn she was weirded out. Now I have on occasion gone to the massage parlor and guess what NO PROBLEM there. It's almost as if I have completely disconnected sex from real life. What happened last night also came after 10 days of no porn and no masturbation.

I am absolutely terrified I will be dealing with this for the rest of my life. I realize 99% of it is me just dwelling on it in the moment, but I cant get my head past it. I guess pills are an option, but I fear becoming reliant on them. I am really scared and embarrassed. The worst part is the fear and shame just build up in my head so when the opportunity presents itself that's all I can think about.

I don't even think porn is the problem at this point. While I'm sure it doesn't help I really think it all comes down to me being so focused on the problem. I am almost in tears about this it has gotten me so upset. Good luck to everyone including myself!

[wised_up]

I was in the same boat as most everyone here.  I became hooked on internet porn and was unable to keep an erection when attempting intercourse with an actual woman.  This shocked me into stopping my daily porn/masturbation cold turkey, as I knew that sex with a real woman was no longer a big enough kick to get me excited.  After a week of cold turkey I tried again with her and another no go.  I faked a bad headache and went home.  One week later, after almost 3 weeks of zero porn/masturbation, I felt that this was going to possibly be my last chance with this woman.  I was really stressing out.  I was really expecting that going cold turkey this long would leave me horny as hell, but actually I felt just the opposite - like I just wasn't interested any more.  Maybe my libido was shot.  Anyway, the morning of the big day I started fantasizing about having sex with this woman - like we were really doing it, what it would actually feel like.  I felt the old juice coming back if you know what I mean.  I worked on it throughout the day.  I was still nervous that night, but I'd built my desire for her and when the time came I was really wanting her (not some DDD porn star) - and I performed!

Needless to say, I'm totally done with porn and I have to say that I don't seem to miss it at all.  Just get that **** out of your life!    

[propeciauser]

Hey guys, turns out all my sex drive issues that I mentioned above were  not actually related to the drug propecia.

They were related to porn abuse. I became highly desensitized to porn since I watched it so constantly for so many years. I've now been battling to quit watching porn. But now my sex drive is progressively recovering.

[RyanRandolph]

Hey guys,

Man, this is a crazy thread!  I can totally relate to all this stuff.  I went through the same process at age 24 (now I'm 27).  I searched through tons of health books, seminars, spiritual healers, psychological programs, etc.  And I did find a few things that actually worked!  Believe it or not but I had to go to the Eastern world to find it, particularly in a philosophical/spiritual/medicinal culture called Taoism.  

Taoism includes many exercises that help you to empower your sexual energy and improve, not only your performance, but also your mindset and your pleasure with regards to sex.

There is one exercise in particular that is very powerful and easy to do.  I ended up compiling everything that I found and experienced into an ebook on my blog that any guy can download for free (I really want to share this with as many guys as possible since its THAT important).

The book goes into why porn actually screws us guys up psychologically, and then covers nutrition/exercises/mindsets that help to overcome it and break free, so that you have a better sex life. I also give the specific step-by-step instructions for the taoist exercise that you can use to stimulate your sex drive and increase your sexual power and function.  

The link to access the ebook is here:  http://www.yangtown.com/ebooks/revive-your-sex-drive-free-taoist-sexual-energy-techniques-ebook/

You do have to enter your email to access the book, mainly because I want to follow up with you about doing the exercises and share with you new discoveries about this topic as I find them.  I am still researching this topic everyday and training with a toaist sexual health practitioner from Hawaii to overcome this condition.  I plan on writing a second follow up ebook soon that goes into my latest discoveries.  

Anyway, I hope this can be a powerful resource for you guys.  Let me know if you have any questions about anything in there or if there are any other things I may be able to help you with.  

Ryan

[RyanRandolph]

Oh btw, here is a link that should be clickable for that ebook:
Revive your Sex Drive - free eBook of Taoist Sexual Exercises for Impotence and Erectile Dysfunction

[laxster]

Wow! I have never been able to relate to someone with my problem until now! I've never had problems with getting girls I just always had problems when it came to sex. I had a girlfriend when i was 14-16 years old and I used to be able to have sex with her anytime i wanted. Then after that I didn't have another chance to have sex til i was 18. In the mean time i spent alot of time watching porn, getting more and more intense as time passed. At 18 i found a new girlfriend. We tried again and again with no sucess. Sadly I even broke up with her because I simply couldnt get arroused during sex even though i knew she was hott. After that I tried having sex with a number of girls all without sucess. (This is when i realized the problem was me not the girl). Last summer i went out with another girl who i knew wasnt going to turn into anything but she was gorgous. We tried to have sex alott and i could only achieve an erection for 5 or 10 mins at most if i was lucky. She was very understanding of my problems and used to make excuses for me like i was too drunk or i had a physical problem but i knew none of those were the case. I would really become depressed when we tried again and again and nothing would happen. I mean if i couldnt get it up for a girl like this i thought i never would be able to.  I'm now 20 years old and I've had so many embaressing moments i couldnt tell you. I truley believe my problems are because my **** and mind are just used to watching porn and my own hand. After reading this and realizing you all are going through the same problem as me and some of you have had sucess after stoping ive decided I'm going to stop watching porn altogether and try as hard as i can to masterbate a little as possible.  I really hope this works!

[jage]

Bro I'm 22 and I think I got the same probably...with porn I'm rock hard but my gorgeous gf its like sometimes...and even then its usually only halfway...I never had this problem before...I think its a confidence issue...I'm not exactly sure how to fix it

[jage]

Ulyou guys are all awesome I've been reading your stories just on the first couple pages very enthused

[Deternination]

when i was 16 - 18 i use to pound woman pretty good. i never use to masturbate that much using porn since i had a one room apartment with my old parents. from 18 - 20 we moved into a bigger house and i had my own room + i went into this gamer mode and didn't really bother trying to get some.  when i stopped gaming and went out again i had few one night stand here and there( or a few night stand with the same girl) all failed. i thought it was just me getting back into the game and it was gonna take a while. than i got locked down with a girlfriend(whos very understanding) and i started to realize that the problem was much more than that. I started to do research online and tried to traced back the history of my past. At first i thought it was the esctacy but it they said the erectile dysfunctions are not suppose to last months. (plus im not a heave user.) Ive quitted estacy for 5 months and at first it was showing result but sometimes id definitely failed. than i started to think its the psycological SO I TESTED OUT. IF I DID NOT WATCH PORN FOR FEW DAYS AND THAN HAVE SEX IT WOULD BE OKAY (THOUGH NOT AT MY PRIME) lets say if i watch porn and masturbated in the afternoon and try to have sex 3 - 4 hours after it would be a failed. i decided to never watch porn again. though i recommend you do close your eyes and masturbate imagining your girl friend doing what you want her to do. and keep yourself healthy stay away from too much electronics especially tv and computers. there are excercise that is suppose to make your penis a little bit better. i think the most important thing is close your eyes masturbate and imagine whoever you wanna imagine instead of watching porn. our mind is a powerful tool, im going to trick it back to the way it was.

[Deternination]

Use my test on yourself and also the solution i have presented. plz get back to me so we all can benefit on how to fix this problem

[iliketoparty]

I'm 18 and i have a very very sexy gf, just unbelievably gorgeous. Whenever we start messin around I start to get hard. But then as i whip it out and she starts blowing it i loose my erection. The second time this happened and she was performing oral sex it was hard for a considerable amount of time, but then i was about to wack it and it went soft again. I don't understand, im totally attracted to this girl and icant seem to keep an erection long enough. Maybe it was all the porn i watched over the years, it could have ****** up my mind. I've watched porn consistently since i was 13. i had just stopped completely for almost 2 weeks. She understands completely and doesnt think its a big deal. I just dont know what to do anymore...

[Pocketfours]

Just curious, you said you stopped the porn. Did you stop with the MB as well for those two weeks. Porn and MB are interelated, when you addict yourself to Porn it usually comes through MB. Porn is the mental part, MB is the physical. When you MB you can also desensitize your penis to normal stimuli, since your so used to using the pressure of your hand. Suggestion, cut out all the porn and MB for a two week period. Give yourself a break. I used to MB in excess of 15 times a week, thats almost 30 times in a 2 week period. Now in the last month, i've only done it four times.

Then when you go back to MB only do it maybe once or twice a week, and to your imagination. If like alot of people on here you desensitized yourself don't worry, just give yourself some time, itll all come back. But it will take at least a couple weeks of patience to do so. You'll be suprised at the benefits, after you get past the initial couple weeks you may even find you don't need to MB that much anymore, you retrained your body, saving all the good stuff for your girl.

[NoodleStrudel]

Words cannot describe how happy I am that I stumbled across this. I think I'm one of the youngest here, just 18 years old nearly 19, but the problem is the same. I have been  watching porn since the age of about 7 or 8 and masturbating frequently since I was 11. I have never had any difficulty getting erect with the visual aid of porn. It was only during this past year that I'd had any real luck with women.

First time I managed to pull a girl and she wanted to come back to my place I was so excited that I could finally get laid and with a really hot girl too! I should also mention that I had consumed a lot of alcohol that night so was pretty drunk, which definitely didn't help. Anyway, when things came to it I just couldn't get hard no matter how hot I found the girl and how much I wanted to have sex. I instantly blamed it on the alcohol and continued to do so for a good few months.

I then with the same girl had a similar experience a few months later, but sober this time. I was terrified and depressed, thinking it was impossible somebody as young as me could suffer from ED. After going to the doctors and having a load of tests, the results said I was fit as a fiddle. I eventually got round to having sex with this same girl, though I struggled to get hard even then and when I finally did I couldn't last very long as I suddenly got way too excited too quick (I find it to be a rather amusing clash of erectile dysfunction and premature ejaculation haha). A couple of days later we tried sex again and I couldn't get it up, it was humiliating.

After reading all your stories it seems like we are all in the same boat and for the first time I feel there is hope! When watching porn I get hard before I even play the clip. Yet when there's a smoking hot naked girl on my bed saying I can do whatever I want with her, my ****'s limper than a bag of sand. Frankly something doesn't add up and I think porn is the problem! I can't believe I never saw the danger in it. I am going to force myself to stop looking at porn and try some of the techniques other guys have suggested.

I can't stress enough what this thread means to me! It's just so good to know I'm not alone. Best of luck to you all!

[Samuel528]

when you watch porn your in the comfort of your own home(1) no pressure. (2) majer hot woman all the time.
So stop watching porn just masturbate with imagination. Or dont masturbate. if you dont masturbate then get her to give you head before u have sex so you can come and last longer. Also if none of this works, it should use that pill that ive forgotten the name of lol.

[sjlplat]

I'm 32 years old, and have noticed over the years that my libido has decreased significantly.  I usually don't go any longer than maybe 6-months being single, but during those periods I turn to self-stimulation and porn to get me by,  The problem is that each new relationship yields less positive results when it comes to sex, and I often lose my erection or can't get one at all.  

Recently I started dating a new girl, and we became intimate.  The first two times we attempted to have sex, I was unable to get an erection.  The second time, we played around for a good 7 hours with no positive results.  Kissing, manual, oral, nothing worked.  Well, I started reading about ED, came across this thread, and decided to give up porn and masturbation completely.  

About a week after giving up porn and masturbation, I found that I was achieving random erections from sexual talk with my girl.  We have had successful intercourse, and my erections are getting stronger by the day.  I have purchased supplements, but I have not yet had the need for them.

I strongly believe porn and masturbation were the root of my problem, and I expect that in the coming weeks my sex life will be stronger than ever.  I have been open with my girl about the porn and masturbation, and I have talked to her about the plausible link between ED and the two.  She is very supportive, and we seem to get closer and more open by the day.

I hope my success will provide some comfort and reassurance to other people out there with the same problem.  The key is motivation.  Stay strong, and focus on the end result.  I have successfully beat a heavy smoking habit and ED with willpower alone, and you can too.

[Kanbei]

First I'd like to say I have successfully fixed this same problem.
Back in 2008, I discovered I had this problem. I tried to have sex with my GF multiple times and failed. I really didn't see this coming. I was scared ********. I thought I'd never have sex unless I bought viagra or something.. I started to frantically look on the net to see if people experienced the same thing. It turns out it's not uncommon.
Thing is, it's all in your head.
Before you go abstaining from porn, switch to more softcore stuff.. something you would actually be doing. Sure it might not get you hard quick or it might not tickle your fancy, but you need to slowly come back to liking it more and more. I'd  say do this for maybe a week or 2 at most. Just TRY to get off on this stuff. After that, abstain..
I stopped watching porn for 2 months.. and I was able to have sex. This will take some patience from a girl friend if you have one, mine did thankfully.

So all I can say is, if you must watch porn, stop watching crazy stuff you're not gonna do. This is just to transition you to abstinence. After that, ABSTAIN FOR around 2 months~! [I did 3.] It really isn't so bad.

I still watch porn, but I don't do it like I used to and I am fine. This was only after the process I went through.

[Kanbei]

By the way, I am 22 and was watching porn since maybe.. 14

[tiger85]

Man I have been going through this problem for the last three weeks.Every time I try to have sex with my girlfriend,my penis just goes on a strike.
I am up and hard even when we are holding hands and walking in the streets.
But when it comes to do the thing it just wont rise up.I 've been really frustrated by this and even asked my girl to leave,but she is really understanding and stood by me.
I know am not sick coz i can get an erection when am with her,just that it goes dead as soon as we start doing it.
I have given up on porn for last two weeks and masturbated only once after the incidence.Still looking for some results.
Your post is really encouraging.
Thanks
Will keep you all posted

[neero]

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/cupids-poisoned-arrow/201003/porn-goes-performance-goes-down

think you need to see this

[krajcara]

thanks for the article it's most helpful and from now I'm going on porn diet

[tk654]

Hey guys, same story here.  Had a long term girlfriend, my first sex ever, and consistently pleased her.  Years later we talk, and she still says I'm the best she ever had.  I could go for a long time, and multiple times per day.  I watched a bit of porn but not much.  Masturbated probably once per day.

Broke up with her, started watching porn more consistently, multiple times per day, and masturbating to it always.

Started a new relationship, and slowly developed ED-type problems.  As the relationship progressed, I continued to get depressed about "losing my sexual abilities" and continually turned to porn to get off, and even to prove to myself that I could get it up.  Porn always worked.

Broke up with HER, now I'm single and developing a FB type relationship.  I'm in great shape, 27 and in all other ways, a confident man.  I'm so happy to have found this forum.

I know it's not a health issue.  I feel like I can link the deterioration of my sexual abilities to my increasing use of, and dependence on, porn.  I quit a few days ago, and last night I definitely got some random boners which is surprising and pleasing.  I'm also trying to do kegel-type exercises to increase my control, by flexing and releasing pelvic muscles throughout the day.  I don't know if I need to quit masturbating, so I'm just doing these two things first, but so far I'm hopeful.

Good luck everyone!

[bert_herb]

This is an interesting conversation, along with others on this forum. I have read many discussions about the negative effects of porn and masturbation on forums with a religious slant. But this discussion is purely from a non-religious practical focus: you guys are connecting a (excessive) porn/masturbation habit with ED symptoms. And most of you are fairly young. I have had a problem with this myself for the last couple years, but I am in my late 40s. My urologist told me my ED problem was most likely in my head and gave me a prescription for Levitra. I think the connection between too much porn/masturbation and ED is legit. You rarely read about that in literature about ED, they just cite "stress" or "emotional factors". But here on this thread there are over 70 replies, most of them saying the same thing---it seems to contribute to the problem. The thing is, nobody is going to talk about this face to face with other guys they know.

[dec5466]

im 24 and i got so used to watching porn that i couldnt get it up with a woman. im seeing someone absolutley beautiful and she is so great in bed but i cant seem to get it fully erect...and its because of the porn..i watch it all the time, same scens and genres and i think i became dependent on it. its a horrible habit and needs to be cut out immediatley its gone so bad now that i cant even get it up fully SOMETIMES while watching porn...wat do i do...please help

[cal2585]

Man I feel your pain. When I was in my teens I didnt get to live life as a ty[ical teenager would..I took care of my fam and was not popular. No G/f or anything so masterbation (masturbation) and porn became that outlet. Ever since I first watched Red Shoe Diaries lol, I got into watching naked women on TV which led to porn. Its been a 14 YEAR!! Period now and I'm 25 and just really finding out this year I have Erection problems. I have ried to stop watching porn but I keep going back. What porn does is it brainwashes the mind and acts on ur deepest inpulses to make us Erect. I won't go too much into detail but do some research like I have to see what it does to a man or even a woman. Its really no good long term, it has caused me to go into a state of depression several times. I'm going to see a doctor for it but what I would suggest is stop watching it forever. It can only cause more problems as it has with me.

[ngc90]

I needed to see all of these posts.  I have a sordid past with molestation and an extreme fear of commitment due to parent/stepparent toxic relationship.  There is definately the porn fantasy and then the real life realization of what is really happening.  I have been with 2 attractive girls, one very much so (dancer!) and it was so embarrassing let alone confusing.  The hotter girl I went down on b/c i didnt want her losing out due to me, and it was fine (not that I love doing it, but at least she gets a lot out of it.)  It is also very emasculating because the one girl thought i was gay, but who can blame her if i didnt get a boner as a 20 year old good looking guy.  It is hard to get women to understand, and uncomferatable to open up about such a personal subject.  I am going to have to deal with this and not look at porn anymore, this has to stop and now i know it is not that all uncommon.  Fantasizing gives me so much better jacking off sessions, and it is almost worthless watching porn it's so bad.  I will def adhere to much of the advice yall have given, and it is so good to here i am not alone.

[kat1967]

I'm the wife of a porn addict. I had no idea he was addicted until we had been married for 9 months. When we were dating, we had an incredible sex life. Right after we were married, he suddenly became uninterested in me sexually. He'd tell me I "needed it more than him" and "sex wasn't all he thought about" and this would be if I wanted to have sex more than once a week. I couldn't figure out what was wrong. I would cry to him and ask him to talk to me about what was going on and he'd just say he wasn't that interested in sex. I found it hard to believe a 38 year old old man wasn't thinking about sex. And I couldn't understand why our sex life had taken such a dive right after we were married. It was like the light switch on our sex life just shut off. I suggested we watch a porn movie, read sexual stories together, anything to try and get him interested. He told me he was NEVER into porn and didn't think it was something we should do. It would just make him feel dirty. Then nine months after our wedding, and after a great day together, I noticed at bedtime he was on the computer for quite a while. The next morning, I went to the computer and stumbled upon his porn. His secret was exposed. All that time he made me feel dirty and oversexed for wanting to be with him (and even share porn during my desperate search to figure out what would turn him on), only to find out HE was addicted to it. I was furious. We have been through counseling and I caught him still going back to porn a couple times (the worst was finding pix of his ex wife and some orgy they engaged in during their marriage that he had saved and been looking at). He swore over the summer he was done with it. Even destroyed all the photo disks. Last week, we went on the most fabulous vacation and had such a good time. He has been using Cialis (swears he has ED, even though he doesn't have any problem getting hard with porn). He took some on vacation and we still only had sex once in four days. So we come home from vacation and I catch him back on the porn. I don't understand. I feel like an idiot. I suggested we have sex two nights ago and he was out of pills so he said he would just get me off. By the time he came to bed, I was half asleep. Same thing last night. I laid in bed and he finally showed up, appeared interested, but I was almost asleep. I wake up and hour later and find him hard as a rock looking at porn. I'm ranting by now, as you can all tell. I just need some advice. I don't want to spend the rest of my life with this horrible sex life. I feel unloved, unwanted, and unappreciated. I feel lied to. He tells me he's sorry and is going to give it up, but we've been married 18 months now and his little secret doesn't seem to be getting any better. Please help me understand this and I'm open to any suggestions.

[Hubfusicate]

I'm 22 and I had this problem the first time I had sex a week ago. I couldn't get it up more than half way during the whole process. I had met this girl a week and a half before then and we decided on something a little more than a FB relationship.

Since we met I had watched porn only once, yet before that I was watching and masturbating pretty often, at least twice every three days. She preferred to do it in the dark under the sheets for some reason even though we're both in shape and all that. I guess she wanted me to take it slow for my first time. The lack of vision probably contributed to my lack of performance since I am likely more visually stimulated from the porn. All that and I was probably more curiously interested in the sex rather than feeling it.

I was able to suspect porn and masturbation as the culprits almost right away. I don't have a problem with getting erections from thought, though. Even when thinking about the first night we tried I get an erection (I had fingered her successfully at least).

I am not sure whether I will be able to recover for our next attempt that will probably come within a week. I am not at the point where I will be totally flaccid, but I can tell my erections probably still won't be as hard as they can be.

One observation... I'm not totally sure about this yet, but I just masturbated in the shower (promised myself this one time between our next meeting), and was able to get full-capacity firmness thinking about that night we had. Though, I think that simply thinking about sex too much may be bad as well. I can masturbate without porn without much difficulty sometimes, I just create it in my head. I think that may be dangerous as well though. So the ultimate challenge for those of us with a problem is to control our thoughts, and not just restricting ourselves from masturbating or jumping to the porn sites on our computer. And that will be really tough!

[Hubfusicate]

I'm 22 and I had this problem the first time I had sex a week ago. I couldn't get it up more than half way during the whole process. I had met this girl a week and a half before then and we decided on something a little more than a FB relationship.

Since we met I had watched porn only once, yet before that I was watching and masturbating pretty often, at least twice every three days. She preferred to do it in the dark under the sheets for some reason even though we're both in shape and all that. I guess she wanted me to take it slow for my first time. The lack of vision probably contributed to my lack of performance since I am likely more visually stimulated from the porn. All that and I was probably more curiously interested in the sex rather than feeling it.

I was able to suspect porn and masturbation as the culprits almost right away. I don't have a problem with getting erections from thought, though. Even when thinking about the first night we tried I get an erection (I had fingered her successfully at least).

I am not sure whether I will be able to recover for our next attempt that will probably come within a week. I am not at the point where I will be totally flaccid, but I can tell my erections probably still won't be as hard as they can be.

One observation... I'm not totally sure about this yet, but I just masturbated in the shower (promised myself this one time between our next meeting), and was able to get full-capacity firmness thinking about that night we had. Though, I think that simply thinking about sex too much may be bad as well. I can masturbate without porn without much difficulty sometimes, I just create it in my head. I think that may be dangerous as well though. So the ultimate challenge for those of us with a problem is to control our thoughts, and not just restricting ourselves from masturbating or jumping to the porn sites on our computer. And that will be really tough!

[Hubfusicate]

Sorry for the double post.

Kat, Your husband is going to need a reason to get off the porn. And epic reason. Mine is that I really want to have actual, good sex with this girl I'm with. He apparently does not value having sex with you as much as watching the pixels on his computer screen. That is going to need to change. You can try to convince him yourself or get someone else to help you convince him that porn is not epic, and it is despicable if he prefers it over a real woman. And/or you can try improving yourself somehow to get him to want you more. But somehow he is going to have to start valuing good sex with you over jerking off to pixels.

[jonnybenotsogood]

Hi I'm 37 and have had problems with sex in real life with my wife. I can get pretty hard watching porn and come quite easily but can't get excited over sex with my partner.

Today I visited an escort as I was going mad just masturbating and also had the same problem with an erection, it was fine up until the condom went on, then it got a little soft but I could still f***. Then there was a brief change of positions and it went very soft, and it took her 20mins of ** to bring me to orgasm.

So not only did I cheat like a scumbag but couldn't perform during a porno style 'you can f*** me in every position/orifice you like' with the kind of woman you'd crawl through broken glass and dogsh*t just to kiss her toes. I did go a week with no masturbation before visiting the escort, but did however look at her profile pictures to the point of obsession thinking of stuff we could do together, and masturbating to the point of orgasm but then stopping... maybe it was too much of a buildup or getting stimulation via the hand.

Reading through your posts porn seems a common thing. As of tommorrow I'm giving it up, I usually look at tube8 or something every day but it's getting ridiculous, and laying off the masturbation... as some of you say a hand has a hell of a lot more grip than a vagina.

No more porn and no escorts.

[sameersgc]

I AM A 39 YRS. OLD WITH TWO KIDS, NOW I AM FEELING WEAK WHEN I GO TO BED WITH MY WIFE, I WAS VERY STRONG AND I USED TO HAVE 4 T 5 INTERCOURSE / WEEK BUT NOW I AM HARDLY DOING IT TWICE, ONE THING I MUST WANT TO SHARE THAT I AM PORN ADDICT AND I THINK THAT REALLY MAKES ME FEEL WEAK. IF ITS TRUE PLEASE ADVISE ME I WILL IMMEDIATELY STOP WATCHING PORN.

THANKS FOR YOUR ADVISE

[TheBoyWonder]

I feel like I'm I've been in an A.A meeting with about a hundred addicts sitting around in a circle. Honestly I feel like I've gotten to know you guys just through stories and support from each of you, sharing and responding. I'm 19 years old and was brought up in a testosterone fueled pack of men. I'm Italian, so the extended family is practically living with eachother. Uncles and cousins, my father and even my grandfather, all with the same viewpoint: "get as much as you can as fast as you can." Now I was raised on this from around age 9. I saw my fair share of things hangin around the older men in my family (I'm about the median when it comes to age) and from the double digits on, my libido was main priority. I lost my virginity at an early age and was commended for it. I was having meaningless sex all through high school and when I didn't have something in front of me, I masturbated constantly. My life revolved around my sex drive. I'd come home for class, masturbate twice, then go out and talk some sleeze into letting me "give her a ride home". Then all of a sudden I had a dry spell, and it was all porn all the time to compensate. When it came to porn, it was up like a rocket, just like usual. But after a while, I used it as a tool for boredom or when I was upset about something. I started to lose my morning wood. From age 16 to just recently, I haven't woken up with an erection. Not too long ago I was in a relationship with a wonderful girl. Model material. Everything I could've asked for, and I started having problems in the sack. I started losing it mid drive (when I could pull of a decent halfmast), calling it "over exertion" or "performance anxiety". we split back in september, causing an alltime high of masturbation, but since finding this site, I've been able to pull myself out of addiction and haven't masturbated to porn in over 2 weeks. The otherday, I woke up, and guess who was staring back at me? That's right- My junk! I started to tear up. I'm starting to get turned on by Victoria Secret commercials and curves on girls just walkin' down the street. It's a beautiful thing. Stay persistent and hopeful. You all have no idea how much you've helped. I appreciate every line in this thread. Good luck to you all. God bless.

[TheBoyWonder]

I feel like I'm I've been in an A.A meeting with about a hundred addicts sitting around in a circle. Honestly I feel like I've gotten to know you guys just through stories and support from each of you, sharing and responding. I'm 19 years old and was brought up in a testosterone fueled pack of men. I'm Italian, so the extended family is practically living with eachother. Uncles and cousins, my father and even my grandfather, all with the same viewpoint: "get as much as you can as fast as you can." Now I was raised on this from around age 9. I saw my fair share of things hangin around the older men in my family (I'm about the median when it comes to age) and from the double digits on, my libido was main priority. I lost my virginity at an early age and was commended for it. I was having meaningless sex all through high school and when I didn't have something in front of me, I masturbated constantly. My life revolved around my sex drive. I'd come home for class, masturbate twice, then go out and talk some sleeze into letting me "give her a ride home". Then all of a sudden I had a dry spell, and it was all porn all the time to compensate. When it came to porn, it was up like a rocket, just like usual. But after a while, I used it as a tool for boredom or when I was upset about something. I started to lose my morning wood. From age 16 to just recently, I haven't woken up with an erection. Not too long ago I was in a relationship with a wonderful girl. Model material. Everything I could've asked for, and I started having problems in the sack. I started losing it mid drive (when I could pull of a decent halfmast), calling it "over exertion" or "performance anxiety". we split back in september, causing an alltime high of masturbation, but since finding this site, I've been able to pull myself out of addiction and haven't masturbated to porn in over 2 weeks. The otherday, I woke up, and guess who was staring back at me? That's right- My junk! I started to tear up. I'm starting to get turned on by Victoria Secret commercials and curves on girls just walkin' down the street. It's a beautiful thing. Stay persistent and hopeful. You all have no idea how much you've helped. I appreciate every line in this thread. Good luck to you all. God bless.

[stu80s]

I am very glad to have found this discussion thread! I am a man in my early 30s, and until recently I had been watching porn pretty consistently for 12 years. Throughout that time I got in bed many times with different girls, but at the point of intercourse, my penis simply would not function. I just assumed that the girls were not attractive enough, or that I was drunk/nervous etc.

However, a while I got into a relationship with a really nice young woman. Even though I like her very much, I couldn't keep myself hard while having sex. She became very upset and sad, assuming (naturally) that she was the cause of the problem. I went to the doctor, and the test results came out normal. I was depressed and angry at myself, until I found these discussions. I asked my GF to be patient, because "I had become too accustomed to masturbation". I left out the porn part because I was certain that she would freak out.

I had always thought that I was using porn as a substitute for real sex, when it wasn't available. But then I realized the obvious: for me, porn *was* sex! Looking at videos I'd get hard instantly. In bed with an actual woman, however, I was just confused, not horny.

I stopped watching porn for good. My doctor had given me a prescription for generic Viagra, which I used in small amounts. My aim was to get into a "positive cycle". In the beginning I couldn't even have sex after taking a boner pill! Then eventually I could perform with them, and finally, after more than two porn-free months, I've had sex without any medical aid, and will probably continue to do so! I feel so relieved.

Judging from the number of replies on this thread, it seems that we're talking about a very serious issue. I live in Europe, and haven't come across much public discussion or research concerning porn-induced ED. While we're waiting for definitive scientific evidence, I encourage everyone to *stop* looking at porn. There's really nothing to lose if you do. For me it was a decision between a healthy relationship and jerking off alone in front of a computer. Which one of these do *you* prefer?

[Markinator]

Your post was very encouraging for me.  I can really relate to what you're talking about - how porn for you WAS sex, and it is the same for me.  Sitting in front of a screen wacking off is 100% the way I experience sexuality and have all my life (I'm also in my early 30's).  I just got out of a short-term relationship recently and when I tried to be sexual with her it was just a disaster.  It felt completely FOREIGN to me trying to be aroused and get sexual pleasure with another human being, since I'm so used to just doing it by myself.  It was very uncomfortable.  There were a few times I was able to get hard, but never enough to have sex.  And even just experiencing sexuality with another person in general was so weird to me, so unusual.  It still doesn't even register in my brain as something arousing (sexual interaction with a woman) - porn does!!  

So you noticed much improvement in two months eh?  That gives me hope.  My ex was so physically attractive and it didn't arouse me at all.  I'm hoping that disconnecting the porn will really help with the erections, I've never been without porn for more than 3 weeks.

[stu80s]

If my experience is anything to go by, I'm sure that things will improve for you as well. Since my last post it's become evident that I'm now able to have sex with my GF several times a week, without Viagra. Score!

If I'm completely honest, in the old days I probably never spent more than two weeks without porn. It really screwed me up. Now I don't even have a particular urge to look at dirty videos anymore.

Porn-induced ED is sad and frustrating, but it's reversible, and the cure is very simple if you stick to it.

[Markinator]

Ok so I'm at a week of no porn and masturbation, it's already really challenging!!  But I'm working hard at this and have a support group as well behind me (I go to SAA 12 step meetings).  Anyway, wouldn't you know that some young attractive girl takes interest in me this past week and starts flirting and makes it very clear she wants to get it on.  LOL!  Most guys would love that and instead it just terrified me because I know that I CAN'T have sex right now.  haha.  Sad.  Hoping this goes away sometime soon so that I can overcome this hurdle and learn how to be sexual with another person instead of just my left hand and computer screen.

[deathgrip]

Thank you for sharing your story.  Like most of you, this thread spoke to me, and I finally realize I'm not the only one... despite being shut down/mocked by GP's, psychologists, urologists, you name it.  I am DONE with this way of living... I am starting P&M abstinence and will let you all know how it goes.  

To ALL: Please keep sharing and let us know how things are coming along... I will try to do the same.

[deathgrip]

And, if anyone wants to talk privately, talk to me on gmail. My user name is deathgrip87

[jimmy8282]

Tonight was the night with the beautiful girl I've been seeing for a couple weeks.  I am terribly attracted to her and should have no issues, right?  Wrong.  I couldn't keep it up.  Twice we tried with a condom.  I know there are potential psychological issues that could be a problem ie I am intimidated by her beauty, etc...but I really think it's the porn.  At least I'm hoping it is.  

I got to a point where I was hard enough but couldn't keep it up.  Usually I can last forever without coming, but this time (w/ the most beautiful girl I've slept with in a long time) I couldn't make it happen.  

I've been watching porn for around 5 years on the reg.  At least once in the morning and once at night.  I'm in good physical shape but do smoke.  I'm gonna try and cut that back alot.  

I really like this woman and I hope to continue our relationship but if this persists, I don't think I'll have the (e)steam to keep it up.  She seems understanding enough and told me 'not to worry about it.'  I am now going to try and cut off the masterbation (masturbation) and porn and hope I can make this happen the right way.  Now I am borderline ashamed because I am a pretty horny devil.  

I take pride in my sexual prowess but certainly can't do it w.out wood.  Pray for me guys.  I'll try and check back in a few weeks to let y'all know how it's going.  

rgds

[jimmy8282]

Tonight was the night with the beautiful girl I've been seeing for a couple weeks.  I am terribly attracted to her and should have no issues, right?  Wrong.  I couldn't keep it up.  Twice we tried with a condom.  I know there are potential psychological issues that could be a problem ie I am intimidated by her beauty, etc...but I really think it's the porn.  At least I'm hoping it is.  

I got to a point where I was hard enough but couldn't keep it up.  Usually I can last forever without coming, but this time (w/ the most beautiful girl I've slept with in a long time) I couldn't make it happen.  

I've been watching porn for around 5 years on the reg.  At least once in the morning and once at night.  I'm in good physical shape but do smoke.  I'm gonna try and cut that back alot.  

I really like this woman and I hope to continue our relationship but if this persists, I don't think I'll have the (e)steam to keep it up.  She seems understanding enough and told me 'not to worry about it.'  I am now going to try and cut off the masterbation (masturbation) and porn and hope I can make this happen the right way.  Now I am borderline ashamed because I am a pretty horny devil.  

I take pride in my sexual prowess but certainly can't do it w.out wood.  Pray for me guys.  I'll try and check back in a few weeks to let y'all know how it's going.  

rgds

[crusador1987]

Masterbation is not a natural act of sex. Any act of sex which is not natural will definitely harm you. At least now you stop it. Seeing porn will make you addict. Better you stop it completely for few months. Go for real sex after six months. meanwhile try unani type of medicines. Apply ;'Tila' on your penis which is an unani massage oil it is very powerful. In addition to this take unani halwas and pills which are very useful. Take advise of some B U M S doctor.

[thedude101]

My advice: Give up porn. Do it now, do it today. I'm 33 and I gave up porn a week and a half ago. It's pretty easy really, jack off all you want just don't look at Internet porn. At all, ever again. What happens is, you get really horny all the time. You make up far-fetched fantasies about your neighbors, you make eye contact with attractive women, you become, in effect, the sexual being that nature intended you to be.

I've always thought I had kind of a low libido, but I think it's mostly been porn holding me back. The goal, if you're worried about your wood going soft, is to starve yourself of sexual explicit imagery. Your mind will fill in once you make the adjustment. It's kind of like eating rice and boiled potatoes every day, then when some chick brings you lasagna and cheesecake you're be wicked randy and stiff as a board.

[blacksheep286]

      First of all I would just like to say that I'm VERY happy I found this forum as everything everyone has said so far regarding their addiction to porn affecting their sex life seems to apply to me! I'm 24 years old and I have been jerking off to porn since I was like 13. like most young guys I started with simply dirty pictures of naked women and over the years upgraded to the more hardcore stuff to get me off... I'm ashamed and upset to say that I just recently learned the dangerous side effect of watching porn! Years ago I went out to a bar and happened to meet a pretty girl, things heated up quickly and by the end of the night I was at her place and we were going at it, but when we got down to business I could not rise to the occasion. She got very upset and I left that night feeling really embarrassed. I blamed it on the alcohol and told myself it was just a fluke one night stand...
    Fast forward to the present, I was recently involved with this amazingly sexy polish chick that works near my job. We would meet up after work and just go at it like animals kissing and making out, I would strip her down to her underwear and just watch her sprawled out on my bed in her bra and g-string, my **** would be so hard you could chop cocaine with it! she had an amazing flawless body and with an *** men would die for (Every she would be up at 5 am at the gym before work...******* crazy lol)...FINALLY after weeks her teasing me with sexy txt messages and our nights of crazy half naked make out sessions, one night she took her panties off and pulled out a condom! I was thrilled!... She smiled... she mounted me and we started for a bit and at first I was fine but then VERY quickly I lost my hard on....We tried again and again but the mood had obviously passed. Few days later she comes over and she gave me one more opportunity to get it and I just could NOT get it up...I was devastated.
      After that things changed between us and the magic spark between us died. She liked me a lot and I liked her, but she had other options as most beautiful women do and she soon moved on. I now understand that it was all the PORN I had been watching over the years!! I thought it may have been the condoms I was using but after reading this forum I now know the truth! I don't understand why more people don't talk about this and teach the dangers of too much porn! for YEARS I was totally clueless to the side effects....I have been following the advise on this forum and come to the critical conclusion...NO MORE PORN!!...I still jerk off, but only with my imagination and not with the EVIL porn. I have been two months without porn, and I don't really miss it to be honest, good riddance... Two months into my anti-porn campaign and I already notice the changes in my little soldier! ...I wish I had know about this earlier !!

[Dee_]

I am a woman, 35 and I separated 2 years ago. Always had a good monogamous sex life, came regularly without too much effort. Since being single, I don't date much, I watch a lot of porn. Over the last two years the type of porn has become more and more extreme to get me off. My vibrator is getting a work out once, twice a day. I realised that whereas I could get myself off with my fingers and imagery and quickly, now it is much harder and the guys that I have been dating it has been much harder for them to get me off. (and as a result I have been faking orgasms as I feel sorry for the guy doing the right thing and putting so much effort in)

When I could not find a clip yesterday to get me off and I refused to go even more extreme I realise I have a problem.

I also think it is the porn I have been watching. Happy I found this thread. Even though I think i am the only female posting.

Also to add this, if a guy does go limp, for me that has never been a problem. It happens every now and then, so really try not to worry about it too much if it does happen. If she loves you, you can still please her any other way.

Off to enjoy my celibacy.

[Crimsonhead]

I am glad that I found this thread. I am in a. Unique case I feel...my gf and. I  have been dating for 3 1/2 years (4 years in July). We started dating when we were both in college and whenever either of us visited one another it was a ton of hardcore steamy sex. It was awesome and although our colleges were about 2 hours away we saw each other four times a month and made it work.

During the first year and a half or so I didn't masturbate a lot due to us having sex more than 7 or 8 times in a weekend. When she graduated (2009) she moved back with her parents in our hometown so it was a lot more difficult for us to see each other thus have sex. This caused me to masturbate a lot more due to the infrequent visits and when she did come it was slowly and slowly becoming more difficult to get an erection

Fast forward to now, I am graduated from college as well and moved back home with my parents she is working retail right now while I am looking for a stable job. We want to tie our lives together for good, we have discussed it together and we both agree this is a decision we both want to make togeter. Recently more often than not when we are together I am still having trouble getting an erection. It is frustrating and irritating. After much googling I have narrowed down the possible causes:

1) porn, duh
2) smoking cigarettes, from googling I found that cogs cause blood constriction which as I am sure many of the guys in this thread know is vital for an erection
3) stress and anxiety; between finding a job and still trying to find a place where her and I can be alone without interruption fro m rents or family.

The combo from all three of these things I feel plays into the overall reason for this erection issues. So I have had the last straw. I transferred all my porn off my laptop and have been off it for about a week give or take some. I am going to try electronic cigarettes and see how they fare. I have an appointment with a urologist next week to see if there is anything else I can do, I am working out daily and doing what i can to lower my stress and anxiety and raise m stamina and self-esteem.

I love my girlfriend and i do want to marry her and I don't want this to be an issue. She is amazing in every way. She is gorgeous, funny, thoughtful, understanding...everything I want I a woman. I am not just doing this for me, I am doing this for us and our future.

[TurnBackTheClock]

I went searching for answer to similar problems and found this thread.  I am glad I did.  I am really surprised at how much porn was ruining my natural sex drive and hopes for natural stimulation.  Since the first of the year I have quit smoking (big help) and also quit looking at hardcore porn.  I am trying a weening approach.  I have masturbated only twice since the first of the year(which is about 1/3 of normal).  I am only looking at webcam girls who are just doing teasing routines.  I plan on then just looking at pictures and then simply using my imagination.  I have also been trying to break any old routines.  I am trying to mimic the movement and speed of natural sex.  Today was the first time I have ejaculated without beating my member to death in very long time.  I feel like I am in H.S. again!  I am on board.  No more porn and no more smoking for me!

[healthyliving790]

I don't normally post replies on threads, but because I have such a personal connection to this particular one, I couldn't help but just voice my appreciation.  

Last night I had the same experience as all the ones listed here - it was basically the first time in a WHILE that my girl and I had the opportunity to spend the night together, and I couldn't have been more thrilled...at least, that's how it was until the "moment" came (or not, so to speak) and went...and I just could NOT for the life of me keep it up.  In desperation I tried to go manual with it and get hard enough, but all of it was just digging myself in a deeper hole.  IMMEDIATELY feelings of failure, inadequacy, and just pure self-pity started to creep in...and I know such feelings are certainly not beneficial in any way, shape or form...but it's just SOO difficult to ignore them, especially when it comes to your "manhood."

Needless to say, the best way to overcome problems like these is knowledge...and I am REALLY thankful that everyone on this forum shares my same story and that I am not the only one!  I will certainly take the tips that everyone has laid out and begin implementing them in my life...really, thank you all so much for your words of advice.  In retrospect, all those nights with just myself and computer are TOTALLY not worth it in comparison to a healthy sex life with my girlfriend.  I, too, have decided to just completely format my hard drive and rid myself of all the porn and instead focus my energies on keeping my body and mind healthy and living up to their full potential.  I'll update the forum on my progress!

[itsjustforfun]

I have had trouble since starting porn and it has gotten worse.  I always suspected but no doctors seem to address all of this so I discounted it.  I have been on porn for 9 years and kept escalating the stimulation.  

My friendships in the past year have slowly deteriated.  My health is suffering.  I take frequent naps. I am drowsy. I leave work and just in my sleeping bag in my car and take a 45 minute nap in 20 degree weather. I am certain these MB/Porn habits have caused the health issues.  I tried about 10 herbs and refuse pharm drugs. Even intense herbs did not work.

I am about 3 weeks sober. It was incredibly tough the first 3 days and even 10 days.  It gets easier.  I am still drowsy but slowly regaining some energy and some night time hardness but it is still soft. At least it is something.  My friendships are recovering a little too and so is my relationship with my wife.  I'm hoping things start functioning in the next 4 weeks.  She's been incredibly patient but I've only told her it's a masturbation problem... not porn.  She'd freak out about porn.  

This has to work. Fingers crossed.

Another website that has helped me is http://www.feedtherightwolf.org/.  You all helped me. Thank you!

[za00]

Well I had a very similar problem to many of you and have a partial success story at this point!

I'm 24 currently and started masturbating to porn around 12. I would say I've done it an average of 3 times a week since I was 12. I've gone through some periods where I don't do it for a while (six months was the longest) and other periods where I'm doing it like 3 times a day.

About 6 weeks ago I all of a sudden noticed that I was not getting hard nearly as easily as I normally do, and even after working at it with my hand it took a ton of work to get hard and then quickly went soft again. Interestingly, the porn I had been looking at wasn't super extreme, in fact it was less extreme than some of the stuff I had looked at years before. But for whatever reason, the problem first arose 6 weeks ago.

I went to the doctor, they prescribed me viagra and assured me it would go away. I took the viagra, and looked at some soft porn just to make sure it worked and I got my confidence back. I got super hard, so that worked, but the next night I quickly moved back to much harder porn. For about a week, I kept getting hard with the hard porn and thought I was back to normal. Then, I decided it was once again time to call porn quits (I've done this many times in my life as I have serious ethical problems with porn).

As soon as I stopped looking at porn, my problem came right back.

Then I found this site. I followed some of the advice on here. I went cold turkey off porn. No porn, no nothing, not even pictures of hot girls. And I didn't masturbate for a week and a half (that was very difficult). It took only 3 days to start getting hard without touching myself. After 6 days I was thinking about the last girl I was with and wanting to have sex with her really bad (but notice I was not thinking about porn).

I had planned on going 2 full weeks without masturbating but I had a ****** day and ended up doing it (by the way if you ever go a week and a half without masturbating...wow...just wow). After that I have been doing pretty good. I find that if I try to masturbate more than once in 24 hours I can't get as hard as easily the second time. And I'm still having to resort to pretty crazy fantasies to get horny, so I'm not that horny for regular sex. I haven't been back to the porn at all (so I've been 6 weeks without it). I know I'm not totally there but in this short time I'm mostly back to normal! What do you guys think I should do now? Should I take another break from masturbation?

I've hardly been sexually active at all. Never had sex, only oral twice and it was pretty bad. Before all this stuff happened, I felt like as soon as I was sexually active I would be physically capable of getting hard and having sex at least 3 times a day, if not 4 or 5. Where I am now, I feel like I need to wait 48 hours between masturbating in order to get a really full erection (I can get pretty hard without waiting that long but now I have a tendency of going soft right as I am cumming). So...will another break from masturbation do good for me? Or does it just take more time for my brain to detox from the porn?

[Crimsonhead]

Well I am back and  have some "slight" findings.

I have cut all the porn out of my life, I am able to now masturbate and get a great erection without using porn and just using my imagination and thoughts of my gf. Porn has taken the very backseat in my life and I don't need it.

I am working out daily, I am taking Vitamin E, Vitamin C and Ginko Baloba (helps blood flow too), and am trying to cut down on the smoking. I don't drink as much as I used to and my drug use is down to 0 as well.

I went and saw my Urologist yesterday and the first thing he said to me was "why are you in here? You're too young to be in here!". The diagnosis he gave me was that it is mostly stress/anxiety related. He told me that he knows I just graduated and that I want to marry my GF and that there is a lot of stress on my plate but know that things will be ok and to relax and love her and care for her and be with her and not rush or force the issue. Just do things naturally and talk to my gf about it.

Stress I know is a big factor and pair that with poor dietary or lifestyle choices and its bad news. I am making slow but sure changes to my life and I am liking what I am seeing. I'll post again when I know more! Cheers!

P.S.

@ za00: Porn will mess with your mind and does ruin the sex drive. It is not easy to stay off it but trust me once you do you will feel like a new man. Just roll with it and don't even think about it. Just try to use your own imagination and your own thoughts of intimacy as your fuel and don't force the unneeded pressure on yourself. Sex and other activities of that nature are meant to be done with nothing but the lust and the passion on the brain, if there is anything else that will kill the sex drive.

[MovingOnUp]

This is one of the best dialogues I've seen about porn induced ED so far. It's very inspiring and also encouraging. Hope and the ability to turn things around seem to be a prevalent outcome among those who have overcome it.

I myself, began as young as 4 or 5 rubbing myself after seeing topless pictures of women in the paper. That became a habit even though I could not comprehend what I was doing nor why it was pleasurable. I still felt shame though, even at that young age and tried to do it out of sight and would be very cautious. Quite interesting behaviour really.

Then, it continued until my teens whereby I adopted the method as popularised by the dominant hand, as oppose to what I did before, friction. It was around this time too that I used TV programmes, erotic or more harder things. Then the internet arrived in my house! I would watch those 10-30 second clips on a dial-up connection and leave them on repeat. In my early teens I was even taking days of school to masturbate, as my urge to do so would often mean that on a day off, I'd do it as much as 5-8 times. Ridiculous really.

BANG! Broadband arrives... suddenly accessing the glorious world of ultra-hard porn. Whereas once I'd open up a few pages of galleries and flick through the different sets, I began opening up anywhere between 5 and 10 or more porn vids and have them streaming all at the same time. I went through all the niches and all the categories and they wouldn't be mainstream after some time.

After a string of awkward relationships where I avoided sex because of failure and a general lack of sexual attraction to my partner and many wasted years of my youth where I didn't do as my mates did, instead I would cop out and make excuses, sometimes appearing to have a moral character, when really I was just deluged with mental problems; I have now decided that it's time to sort this out, after having suspicions that porn could be the culprit. I have been checked out by the docs and got the A-ok and I have used many oral meds of which I've had varying success - but not reliably enough.

Now I am in my mid-20's and don't want to waste any more time, so here I am. Last week I masturbated 3 times on the Friday, but today, a week later I haven't masturbated once and haven't watched any porn, therefore no orgasms. Strangely enough, I haven't had any urge to watch the porn. If I didn't have a reason to not watch it, maybe I'd have got the urge, but for me the whole point is that I won't enjoy masturbation or real sex again until I can attain a qualified erection naturally and instinctively and porn does not facilitate that, so I am not interested in it at all.

I've read it takes between 2 weeks to 3 months to notice changes in how your brain and penis adapt and so my tagret at first is 2 months and assess from there.

What I've noticed in 1 week of abstinence:
-My penis appears a bit fuller, as if vitality is restoring. I guess multiple masturbations everyday for the best part of my life drained it constantly.
-I noticed a small increase in natural erections and even worked it up to an erection (very hard) just as an experiment, whilst standing up. It wasn't an active masturbation session by any means.
-I do keep going to pee a lot, not sure if this is a reaction to the increasing sensitivity.

Bearing in mind this is only just 1 week, I feel the improvements, although small are actually looking towards a positive direction. I will continue to abstain and hopefully by week 2 and the every forthcoming week I will see gradual changes.

I hope that I haven't made long-lasting damage to myself as until I get this nailed, it will be a source of contention in forming relationships, getting married and having kids. Most of all, I won't lie, if it fixes I will be recapturing my youth for a few years no doubt.. too many missed opportunities.

Good luck to everyone and let's keep this dialogue and community going strong so that we can overcome this and gain a better understanding. Eventually all of this will be mainstream knowledge and young men won't find themselves in this situation without foreknowledge. This is just the tip of the iceberg.

[eldopa]

I am hoping that by actually posting here I will be more likely to quit for good unlike the many times I have tried in the past.

I will be an MD in the near future, and with absolutely everything else going for me in terms of mind, body and support/family, I have been increasingly thinking about the degree to which this problem has been affecting me.  I want to have a happy family one day, and I don’t want it to get ruined by something as stupid as this.  In the more immediate future, for the first time in my life I’ve gone a year without meeting a new girl and “dating” her.  I had a few flings with a FB out of desperation, but I don’t feel great about those as I was using viagra out of fear of failure.

The times that I have quit in the past, it has mainly been to try to address this strange ED issue that I have had since I was 12.  Beceause I started so early (12 years old), I’ve never really had a chance to experience my sexuality without P/MB.  I had my first gf when I was 12 and she was 14.  We dated for over a year and got to a point where we were basically trying to have sex but I just wasn’t hard.  I was so young at the time I didn’t think anything of it.  When I was 16-18 I had my first sexual gf.  I had serious performance anxiety at first.  The first time I got it in I wasn’t even at half-mast, she was just extremely wet.  The next time, still not fully hard like a 16 yo should be, we did it in a porn-like position.  I got off to this, and was instantly addicted to using this girl for orgasms and not much else.  I managed to pull off over a year of avid P/MB alongside daily sex with this girl.  Looking back, though our sex was very frequent, it was not normal or healthy.  It was not intimate.  Perhaps that’s why it worked for me.

Through college and the time after, I continued to slowly see girls (average of 1 or maybe 2 new ones a year), but to this day I have gone more than 5 days without P/MB maybe a few times.  Never more than 2 weeks.  As I approach my late twenties, am single, my career is beginning to solidify, I am becoming a little frightened of what the long term detriment might be – in terms of mind/emotion/intimacy.  Because P/MB hijacked my sexuality as soon as it started developing, I’ve never practiced experiencing a relationship with a woman, or EXPERIENCED A WOMAN during a time when porn hasn't been in the background.  This has lead me to develop a  very superficial relationship with not just every woman I meet, but with everyone.  I’ve always been a “loner” and independent, and I’m cool with that, but I’ve used that as an excuse to let my life get ridiculously isolated.  

The deep shame (I cannot even say that I actually feel it but its there), the lack of confidence, fear of rejection (fueled by relationships that ended disasterously bc of me cheating or getting cheated on) are some of the values and justificaiton that I have used to continue this rut that I am in.

Ok I don’t want to digress too much.  The last thing I want to touch on is that my P/MB makes even less sense bc I could totally be doing better if I wanted to.  I’m not going to explain the various ways that me and my life are awesome, but girls have always expressed initial interest in me since I can remember, and I have always failed to follow up on it unless I was I annebriated or she ended up getting frustrated and making the move.  In the past few years, in my professional life, I have noticed more and more of the signals from girls that I have always ignored all my life (eg when a girl smiles across the room, plays with hair, or casually touches you during conversation).  My life is totally literred with blown opprotunities.  People have always told me that I am attractive, that I have no idea how many girls actually have a crush on me, etc…  All this did was provide me with enough pseudoconfidence to avoid hitting rock bottom and kicking the P/Mb for good.  Also, even though I was able to attract girls from across the room, I had NO IDEA how to talk to them or how to develop a healthy friendship/more than friendship with them.  And I knew it, so I did and still do stay away.

Well whatever, its time to try this for real.  If I start to notice erections easier after some time, I will be very happy.  If my relationships with all people become healthier in the long run, I will be really happy, and probably become a different and better person…

Thanks to everyone here… I bookmarked this page

[MovingOnUp]

Quick update..

Only day 10 of 'abstinence'. I put it in reference marks because I occassionally cannot help but to stroke off, not full on masturbation although to be honest considering how aroused and sensitive my penis has become I reckon premature ejaculation would be a problem if I ever staved off masturbation this much. I haven't full on masturbated, not orgasmed (obviously) and I haven't look at any porn videos, but did check out some pics which happened there way to me.

I had morning wood the other day and was astounded. It was rock hard, firm and provided a lot of resistance which means the base was especially hard. It stayed that way even though I was conscious of it for a while. The idea that I could some day just get it up simply and leave it to do its work seems a way off yet and it's a feeling I haven't had before so I do hope I reach this ability. So I will keep on going.

Tips to avoid masturbation: Go for a pee.. definitely takes out that tingling sensation which removes most of the need. Don't even look at a tempting picture for a moment as it soon trickles into a bit more and you soon find yourself stroking away. Fortunately I'd stop before orgasm.

I am reposting something somebody else wrote on another thread (I hope they don't mind). It's just I found it was a source of inspiration in what to expect;

http://www.medhelp.org/posts/Mens-Health/Porn--internet--masturbation-destroying-my-life/show/780103

"Rules:

1.  Don't look at any pictures of women on your computer.  None that are nude, non-nude, or in any sexual situations.  Nothing, nada.  If you see a naked woman in a movie, shut your eyes.  Think of it as poison for your penis.  Make sure the next nude girl you see is in real life.

2.  Only masturbate once every two days.  No more.  You have to re-sensitize your mind.

3.  When you do masturbate, only think of real women in real sexual situations.  Think of women that you like or ex-girlfriends.  Put any porn situations or fetishes out of your mind.  It's very difficult, but you have to bring yourself into reality.

4.  Buy a calendar and put it on your bedroom wall to track your progress.  Mark an "X" for every day that you follow the rules.  Your goal should be an X for every day on the calendar.  No exceptions.  It sounds simple but it worked for me.

This is how my experience went while trying out this plan:

Stage 1:  (weeks 1 and 2)
This is the toughest stage.  It is extremely frustrating to not have the stimulus you are used to having.  I would get cranky and moody.  I was also depressed because I literally could not get it up at times I wanted to masturbate.  I would often relapse into porn in this stage because I wanted to check to see if my penis worked at all.  Of course, then I would be stimulated but I would have to start from scratch again.  After I stuck with the rules for several days though, it slowly got easier to masturbate with only my imagination and real life situations.

Stage 2 (weeks 3 and 4)
I noticed that I could masturbate easier without porn.  I started having good dreams and even some semi night erections.  I started noticing more women in real life and staring at them more.  I would use those images for masturbation and it felt good.  Confidence started going up.

Stage 3 (weeks 5 and 6)
Confidence went way up.  Sometimes I was able to get an erection during the day with simple day time fantasies.  Dreams at night got real good.  Night erections and erections when masturbating reminded me of teenage years."

[MovingOnUp]

Epic Fail.

My man was just too sensitive and even mild stroking which I thought was well safe from orgasm proved not to be. Uncontrollably ejaculated as it was that good when I saw some picture. So a bit of a downer as I have to start from Day 1 again. But 10 days abstinence taught me somehting; that I never in my life had an erection like that before. It was hyper-hard and equally hyper-sensitive (both good and bad as I wouldn't last long with a girl, put it that way.) Felt like I was at breaking point from the first minute. But yes, definitely the porn was the problem. It was a good margin for me to hit though as I now know what to expect and how much of a positive effect abstinence has on the penis. I will try to go for a month now. But seriously, I need something to put on my man that makes the head less sensitive as it just tingles throughout the day.. waiting.. reminding me.
Also, my ejaculate was ridiculous. It wouldn't stop and I'd have put Peter North to shame let me tell you. Definitely one for the future.. it's all about abstinence my friends. Even 10 days did wonders. Let's see what a month has in stall.

[sadanddepressed]

I wish I had found this forum a month ago before it was too late. I have had the same experiences as all on this forum (52y/o). I have been addicted to porn for 5 years. I had less and less interest in my wife of 22 years. This is a real problem. It got to the point that I had no erection with my wife and only with porn. I knew I was capabable of an erection because I had them with porn. I was suspect of porn being the problem but would always discount the notion. I actually quite the porn thing a week ago and have already noticed positive sign with the return of morning erections. I have totally quite looking at porn of any kind. I know this was the problem. Sadly my wife of 22 years left home 4 days ago because of the lack of my interest in her sexually. She is 8 yrs. younger than me and very beautiful. I am so devisteded because she is my best friend and my true sole mate. I fear the worst, that she won't return. I lost the most special thing in my life to this F-ing addiction! Please, everyone quite now before this happens to you !!!!!!!   Pray for me.

[Iamjason]

Well guys it seems it's a horrible problem and it only gets worse with my generation and younger. I'm 31 and I have a friend that's 21.  he's been viewing porn since he was 11 or 12. so he practically has more experience with fantasy, porn related interactions with women,,i.e. webcam hook-ups, chat rooms, porn chats,etc. than he does with REAL LIFE interactions.

I became addicted to porn about 6 or 7 years ago. I quickly noticed that i went from having erections all the time to not having them at all or if i did have them they were semi-erect. But 6 years ago there weren't sites like this so I thought the problem was with something else.

fast forward to about a year ago. I met a wonderful girl,, amazingingly attractive. i was scared half to death to have sex with her because I knew I wouldn't get an erection, So I tried an experiment. I kept putting her off and gave up watching porn or masturbating for about 3 weeks.Then I had sex with her and it was wonderful. Yes I ejaculated quickly but i got another erection within 5 minutes.the girl and I started seriously dating, so i confessed to her my problem. You know what she said,,,,, she's had 6 B/F's including me and 4 out of the 6 had the same problem.  She's only 25. She said that the other guys didn't care and didn't want to work on it but if I did want to work on it then she will be patient with me.

with her help i got down to watching maybe a porn video a month and having sex with her maybe 5 to 6 times a month with NO problems. it took about a month with no porn watching or mastiurbating at all in order for this to happen.

Then she had to move out of town and I screwed up. We saw each other about once a month and in between the time I started watching porn again. Guess what,,,,, No erections again.  This time her patiences was wearing thin,, and I don't blame her. All I had to do was to not do it for a month and everything would work out.

We broke up this past summer 2010 and I've started counseling to help me break this habit. I look at it just like a drug or alcohol addiction. I try to do something else when I get the urge,, like come on this site and post or do some music. My ex has said she will help me and said I can call her when I feel the urge to watch it. The past three nights we've talked on the phone until I feel asleep which kept me from watching porn. She is an amazing person and I hope I can get her back once all of this is done.

But guys,,, I tell you porn is deadly for your real-life relationships. If you don't have a gf and don't plan on having one then go ahead and keep watching but if you want to keep and  your REAL-LIFE woman,, then you have to let it go.  

I would say,, to any guy,,, If you have the urge, then come on here and post what you would be losing. Afterwards if you still want to watch it then go ahead but I gaurantee , if you type out what you could potentially loose you will see that it's a lot.

[MovingOnUp]

Really struggling. Sacrificing orgasms and porn is fine but masturbation is a whole different ball game. The urge is intense. I start stroking unconsciously sometimes and others I've kind of tested to see it there's an improvement. But once you start then it's very difficult to will yourself to stop. Fortunately I have stopped but it's only day 5. I really need to cut out any more masturbation - even though I'm not orgasming. I'm also concerned about how quick I will be to orgasm. If I refrain like this in future then when I do meet a girl my new problem might be 'minute man'. I hope it doesn't go from one extreme to the other. This thread is dying a bit. Please give success stories or any difficulties you're having! Thanks : )

[healthyliving790]

Hey everyone,
    So I haven't looked at any porn since January 13...needless to say, I've already experienced some really positive changes in my erections!  With a combination of no porn, taking zinc supplements daily, and kegel exercises, my erections already feel stronger and fuller than they did before - at 25 years old, I'm feel like I'm 17 again, haha.  There definitely is still some work to do, and I know it will take time, but already these positive changes are just motivating me even more.  So for those of you that are in doubt, hang in there!  Just remember that whatever temporary elation you might get from masturbating now is TOTALLY NOT WORTH IT it in comparison to having a healthy and FULLY functional erection...one that can lead to a positive and long lasting sexual experience.  

What definitely helped me, especially in those for couple of days, when I felt the urge was reading all of your success stories on this forum or MEDITATION!  I definitely cannot stress enough how, in parallel with the physical changes that you are doing to your body (i.e, resensitizing your penis, increasing blood flow to your area, increasing zinc levels), you must also make mental changes as well.  What I mean is, getting down to the root of the problem and breaking the habit whenever the urge arises.  Whenever the urge came to me I would just sit back, slowly start to focus on my breathing, fully become aware of the internal urge to masturbate, then slowly just let it go.  Especially if you're become incredibly self-conscious due to pass failures in bed, letting go of those anxieties and habits through meditation is one of the BEST ways to replace bad habits with good ones (not masturbating/looking at porn) and negative thoughts with good ones (anxieties with self-confidence).  

Meditation not only clears up your head, but it helps increase blood flow throughout your body as well!  Seriously, I highly would suggest looking into some meditation techniques - good mental health is JUST as important as good physical health.  

Good luck, everyone!

[MovingOnUp]

Thanks for this point, always room for more positive posts like that. I'm also 25. I have some Maca on hand which I could draw upon but will definitely look into Zinc. L-arginine too sounds like it could be a good addition. What do you think of kegel exercises? Have they had any improvements for you? Meditation is something else i'll look into. I definitely need to address my self-esteem/anxiety issues with more than just hoping for the best which is what I usually do. How best to tackle nerves or anxiety though? As gaining a full erection and maintaining it is such a sore issue for us, how do you totally shut it out when it comes to being with a woman? Any tips?
Do you have any links to websites for the kind of meditation you do?
I'm on day 6 now. It does seem keeping busy and away from lounging around and sitting in front of the PC is the way to go to avoid any desire to masturbate. I really want to see the results after 2 months so I will refrain this time.

Cheers again and keep us updated with your progress at regular intervals if possible! :)

[Iamjason]

Well I'm NOT doing as well. After about a week or so, I started having random erections again and morning erections but then I fell of the wagon this past Sunday and Monday.  So I'm starting from ground zero again.  I started thinking and realizing that I;m not going to get my ex back, so i thought WHY NOT! But I know that's the wrong idea. I'll start agin today.

But like I said before that, with not watching porn for only a week, I noticed a change. I just need to stick to it.

For the guy that's worried about being a minute man. Just explain that to the girl you're with. I don't know one girl that would be upset that you haven't been with a girl in awhile, plus premature ejaculation is a lot easier a problem to deal with than ED. The point you want to get to is where you can masturbate without hurting your real-life encounters. Once you get to that point you can start to masturbate again. The Problem is the combination of Porn and Masturbating  together.

[ThunderRebel]

Research this my brother-
Tongkat Ali, Chinese Ant Power, Tribulis Terrestris, Maca, He Shu Wu, Euccomia, Cistanche, Coconut oil/cream, Deer antler velvet, Sarsparilla, ginseng, gynostemma, lycium berry, ashwaganda, kelp, rehmannia, good wholesome saturated fat, I-3-C, iodine, defatted flax, citrus peel.
Some of these herbs are steroid/androgenic hormone builders and powerfull aphrodisiacs, others are bad and excessive estrogen removers. Look into it, you will find help!!!
When you start doing this programme you will gain a strong libido and disire for sex, if there are no women around DO NOT WATCH PORN OR MASTURBATE. As this will ruin the whole programme.
Be sure to stay in touch and keep me informed of your progress.
In peace brother,
Goody

[Klueless]

What you guys are coming up with is great!!! I have looked on some of the other pages but this one is actually focusing on a SOLUTION!

@ ThunderRebel have you seen these supplements work for someone and aid their recovery?

I have not been able to sustain lasting results myself just yet although my P&MB has gone way down from about 5 times a week to only about 13 times this past year!  I have experimented with different supplements and have had mixed results.  I have even tried Viagra on and off (worried about lasting effects).  Some things that I believe has held true in my experiences over the past few years:  EXERCISE (Cardio especially) works wonders, ALCOHOL is BAD!  My most successful and lasting spurt was with Viagra & a pill called Libigrow.  By no means am I telling ANYONE that they should go and try this I am simply stating that it worked for me by taking them together about twice a week.  This would give me a hard erection and I was extremely horny during that time!  I was also working out and occasionally taking NITRIX in conjunction with my workouts (but not near the times I was taking Viagra because I did not want TOO much nitrous oxide in my system)!!  This was only a temporary fix lasting about 3-4 days but it did allow me to have some great sex in the interim.  Again I am not ADVOCATING doing this yourself I am simply saying what I did and the results I experienced MYSELF (I am not saying that this should be done!)

I am looking for help on which supplements are good to take with a workout plan.  Also WHO HAS made a full recovery from this and has their normal hard erections back?  I would like to hear from all of those that HAVE made a full recovery.  & if you do happen to do so PLEASE come back and share with the rest of us to help us recover as well!

Thanks & I will be praying for us ALL!!!

[perpetter]

I think I have suffered from this for years, last time i even attempted being with a girl was almost 5 years ago... back then I was unable to get it up when it came down to it, I was embarrassed and felt guilty... and Im pretty sure she felt unsure about herself, which was the last thing I wanted her to feel. It didn't take long till she called it off, I didn't mind that much, we didnt really have that much in common, she was hot but that was about it really.
I sorta thought that that might have been the reason for me being unable to perform. Recently I have unconciously gotten more and more involved with a new girl, over a period of 6 weeks. We had a date and ended up back at mine, and again I could get it up... I had watched porn and masturbated a fair bit leading up to the date as I wanted to be able to last more than a minute... luckily for me, she really likes me (as I do her) and she tried like a champ to get it up, no luck... but she was ok with it... I found this site the day after, and have not watched any porn since, that is 8 days ago now... she has been by, but due to time its been makeout sessions nothing more, and now she is away for a few days. Hopeing that my erection will reappear next week, I am getting morning wood again, I am getting random erections a lot whenever i think of her... my "hornyness" has gone back to where it was when i was a lot younger, and the erection is no longer half-assed...
Ill try to let you know how it goes, I believe it'll go well, i really hope so... cuz this girl is the best thing to ever happen to me.

[perpetter]

"We had a date and ended up back at mine, and again I could get it up... " ... should be couldn't

[yournormaljoe208]

I have the same problem as all of you. I recently had sex for the first time and couldnt keep it up. Obviously not lasting for your first time is expected but ever since my first time I havent watched porn and havnt been able to get a hard on. I am pretty sure I have strong confidence issues but other than that I just havent had the desire to get hard for almost 5 days. I am in the process of getting in shape and am a fit person but im concerned that my sexual drive is no longer there. Is there a kind of porn withdrawal that I might be experiencing? Will I eventually with more exercise and a better confidence be able to up my sex drive? because with no drive I have no desire to get hard. please help

[perpetter]

Hang in there! Apparently it takes varying amounts of time for people to get that drive back... Took bout 5-6 days for me but others have reported longer amounts of time. Id give it some more time, just stay away from the porn... i admit i was fairly down the first few days cuz there was not a single sign that I was gonna get an erection out of nowhere... then one day i could feel like it wanted to go up, but didnt... couple more days and there it was.
Hopefully it will come back soon for you too.

[TurnBackTheClock]

I have been sticking with my program since the beginning of Jan.  I have had a couple set backs but I have not let that discourage me.  I have quit smoking, which I believe has been a big help as well.  I still am in the habit of looking at pictures of chicks online, but I am slowly cutting that out as well.  I have allowed myself to masturbate every 3 days if I have the desire.

Now to the success... with porn cut out I now wake up every morning with morning wood.  I also have random erections throughout the day.  My sex drive is over-drive right now.  It is the most intense as I am leaving the gym/after working out.  Seeing all those cuties in their tight little gym outfits bouncing around on the treadmills... ahhhh, sensational.  My increased sex drive has given me greater confidence and thus greater success with women.  I have hooked up with a different woman every weekend since the New Year.  Although this is not exactly what I am looking for, the success I have had with each of them proves to me that I can operate on purely primal and animalistic level.  Before I thought I could not.  I even took a girl home after having 7-8 drinks and had no problem keeping it up!  I was even able to maintain an erection in positions I thought were not possible for me.  It was grand!  Right now I have had SO much success with the ladies that my phone is blowing up.  I am talking to half a dozen different women right now.  

A few more things...  Gentlemen, keep struggling through those moments of temptation.  If you have to masturbate, use your imagination!!!  I like to call it the "Spank Bank".  You see a hot chick while grocery shopping... put in the spank bank.  Try to have a realistic fantasy about a REAL woman.  Second, shut down the smoke stack.  Third, stay away from alcohol at least for several days before a sexual encounter just to be safe.  Fourth, exercise.  Even if it just busting out 20 pushups before work.  Chicks dig muscles and exercise is great for you and your member.  

To YourNormalJoe:

Are you taking any prescription meds?  Possibly anti-depressants?  Those can kill your libido.  I take them and I finally switched to a different drug because I had no sex drive.

[Walt771]

I read through every single one of these posts while at work and I must commend all of you on being able to discuss this.

About a month ago, I failed to stay hard while in my fiancee, whom I love dearly. Chalking it up to stress (work and bills), I wrote it off. I watched porn on a fairly regular basis and masturbated to it easily before hand when our sex life wasn't having issues. And so began a viscous circle of not being able to perform in bed, and turning to porn to get off. Recently, I've felt lethargic and haven't wanted to do much at all. The last time I masturbated to porn it was a half-assed erection. I decided it was time to look for help.

I haven't watched porn or touched myself for about 2 days and I'm starting to notice some slight movement down there. I'm going to give it some time and not masturbate or have sex for a few more days then give it a try.

[oakever]

Same problem. I started masturbating when I was ten.... I didn't even know what I was doing untill I was twelve. I have always masturbated 1-3 times (every once in a while I would quit, never lasted more than a month) a day and I went off and on with porn.

Now I'm almost 24 and I can't get an erection with a girl. Sometimes it will go half way, but it doesn't last long. I have no problem ejaculating and I have penetrated with a "chub", but it goes right back down. I have even done oral and I still can't make half erection last.

I know that it is mental, but I also think that porn is a big issue. I think my body has gotten used to the masturbating and now my body can only identify "erection time" when I have porn in front of me.

I heard a doctor who is an expert on the brain say that the effects porn have take nine months to heal.

Any profesional advice or advice based on experience would be appreciated.

[oakever]

Same problem. I started masturbating when I was ten.... I didn't even know what I was doing untill I was twelve. I have always masturbated 1-3 times (every once in a while I would quit, never lasted more than a month) a day and I went off and on with porn.

Now I'm almost 24 and I can't get an erection with a girl. Sometimes it will go half way, but it doesn't last long. I have no problem ejaculating and I have penetrated with a "chub", but it goes right back down. I have even done oral and I still can't make half erection last.

I know that it is mental, but I also think that porn is a big issue. I think my body has gotten used to the masturbating and now my body can only identify "erection time" when I have porn in front of me.

I heard a doctor who is an expert on the brain say that the effects porn have take nine months to heal.

Any profesional advice or advice based on experience would be appreciated.

[TurnBackTheClock]

I suppose it could take 9 months to erase 12 years of bad habit forming behavior.  I would recommend taking a short break from Masturbation.  When you start up again only allow yourself to do when you feel like you absolutely must.  Get away from any screen or visual/audio stimulation.  Practice arousing yourself with realistic fantasies.  The girl in you sit next to in class, a girl you work with, or a girl you saw the other day, etc.  While masturbating attempt to simulate real sex.  Try to mimic the speed, pressure, intensity.  If you are unable to get off that is ok, just don't fall back into old patterns.  The goal is to re-sensitize yourself to normal sexual contact.  This program has worked wonders for me.  I have the same background as you and only slightly older.  I now can have sex with a full hard-on and it has only been a month on this program.

[jasony48823]

I am 35 now. I did not become a regular porn watcher until I was 30. When I watch porn, I also masturbated (pretty hard).  Even when I was 32, I had no problem getting hard and staying hard at all. But I started having trouble staying hard at around 32-33. Now I absolutely have ED when I have sex. I thought it was because of my age but after reading all the posts here, I think it is more porn-induced since (1) I am still horny all the time and (2) I am very healthy (eat right, exercise and in-shape, plus I just had a medical check-up recently and nothing is wrong).

So I am going to stop watching porn now. But since I am still horny all the time, it is hard not to masturbate or have sex occasionally with my fb. For those who have recovered from porn-induced ED, can you give me any suggestion about masturbation? should I completely stop doing that? I know for sure I will not/should not stimulate as hard as I did when I was watching porn. But is there anything else I need to pay attention so that I can recover faster?? Thanks

[perpetter]

13 days of no p or m, and i was able to keep it up and reach orgasm from a *******, best orgasm ever! I was however unable to keep it up during penetration, but hey, its a lot better than where it was!
Will keep u guys updated :)

[MovingOnUp]

So I started again on the abstinence.. m/p/o.

It's day 6 and libido is shot, no desire whatsoever, which makes abstinence easy. But when I abstained before, I was very horny. I'm wondering why the change? Also, this time I've been eating healthily more, mostly vegetarian meals. I have also been supplementing with Korean Ginseng, Ginkgo Biloba, Pycnogenol, L-Arginine, Fish Capsules and Zinc. I thought adding these supposed reproductive enhancers would at least keep me as I was before, but it's unusual that I have no libido at all now. Weird. But as I said, makes abstinence easy. A bit of a double-edged sword really.

Will abstain for as long as I can. Aiming for a few months but I imagine I'll get caught a long the way when horniness kicks in and sensitivity is too high. We'll see.

[WhatzWrongWithMe]

same problem... there are times when i am able to have sex with my gf, and times when i can't get fully excited, and the erection is too weak or is not present at all... i will quit all forms of porn... i won't even watch a second of it... i hope i'll go back to being rock-hard as i was...

[WhatzWrongWithMe]

forgot to specify... no more porn and no more mb for me! i quit...

[palpateit]

ED caused by porn is not psychological, it is structural and biochemical.

Internet porn can become an addiction, and with all addictions the brain changes, or adapts. It does not matter if the addiction is to a substance or whether it is a behavioral addiction, the same brain changes result.

Today's internet porn is nothing at all like our ancestors ever encountered, with the constant novelty and genres of extreme porn. Unlike yesterday's Playboy, Internet porn overstimulates the brain structures responsible for libido and addiction.

Brain changes include a drop in dopamine receptors in the reward circuitry. Reducing the amount of dopamine receptors decreases your pleasure response to "normal" stimuli. In other words, real-life sexual partners and previous porn won't get your brain going
enough to get your penis going. Turning on dopamine receptors is how you get turned on.

Here are two well done presentations by a science teacher on the effects of pornography on the brain. They are non-religious, non-judgmental, and science based.

Erectile Dysfunction and Porn:
http://yourbrainonporn.com/erectile-dysfunction-and-porn

Your Brain on Porn - Porn Addiction:
http://yourbrainonporn.com/your-brain-on-porn-series

Knowledge is power,
good luck

[WhatzWrongWithMe]

Great presentation/article !!!
I also think (and feel) that masturbation weakens the signals/sensations sent by your penis to the brain. We are used to a stronger and stronger grip when masturbating on porn... that doesn't (usualy) happen when in bed... so while our penises are used to strong stimulation from masturbation, when in bed, a simple/gentile touch would send nothing to the brain.

i also found out that (sometimes) having a lot of water in your sistem, helps performing in bed... i don't know how to explain it... maybe it pushes some buttons down there... maybe it's something to do with blood... i don't know... hope it helps!

[eldopa]

1 month update....

Keep in mind I have probably one of the most deeply rewired brains when it comes to porn use.  Though I have had a fair amount of sex in my life (not tons, and not much recently!) we are talking about 15 years of pretty much daily hardcore porn use.

My personal goal is to no longer use porn.  The first 2 weeks I was totally abstinent from PMO.  In the past 2 weeks I have gotten some serious urges to say F IT and peel one off to porn.  A lot of times this wasn't due to sheer horniness, but was during times that I am just really stressed (eg day before exam) and craved that release.  So I have masturbated imaging real life women or ex-gf experiences a few times.  These sessions were substantially less pleasurable than what I have been doing the past 15 years.  Really goes to show how decensitized my brain & penis have become, and how much healing I have to go.  At this point in the game, I'm not masturbating for pleasure so much as to get in the habit of doing it to real life fantasy and also to prevent myself from a relapse (yeah, ideally I would probably continue total abstinence)

So in terms of personality/emotional wise I am feeling better.  I am generally skeptical of most remedies whether they be behavioral or medicinal, so I say this with confidence.  Things I have noticed: decreased anxiety, less mood swings, more social, more confidence, more ballsy when it comes to girls (still have a ways to go in this dept), urge to improve myself (weightlifting, kegels, reading up self-help stuff), better concentration, smoother talking, good jokes:bad jokes ratio improvement, you get the idea...

In terms of the ED I am going to be honest and say that I haven't noticed a change, *BUT* this is what I expected.  I have had some dreams where I was having sex with real life girls I know or knew, which is oddly something that never happened before.  I've also had dreams where I am in specific "favorite" porn scenes with porn stars, which is kinda disturbing.  I've woken up with morning wood a couple times, but thats not new.  What I am really hopeful of is that I can get to a point where I can spontaneously get hard when I'm at home and relaxing.  Or, if I could even get a halfy when looking at a real life girl in public.  But yeah, none of this as of yet.

Not  that I am an authority, or better informed than anyone else that is well-read, but given my science and medical education, I strongly believe in the psychology today/cupid's poisoned arrow theory on porn use and ED.  This viewpoint needs to get out there, because the whole religous shame approach is total BS imo, and is just a lost opportunity to educate young men whom are suffering from a physiologic problem that is really just within their brains .  Basically, I wish I had learned about this 10-15 years ago.  Im still 27 so hopefully its not too late.

I still got a ways to go...  If I do end up being successful, then ANYONE can do it.

[itsjustforfun]

It's been 7 weeks for me.  This is my 2nd post.

Once I got past the first 5 days, this whole thing has been a lot easier for me than i ever thought it would be.  

I've had improvements in about this order:
Week 1: First 4-5 days were awful. I was like suicidal and anti-social.
Week 2: Surprisingly easier. A little response from the penis.  Feel a little bit better but still really bad at times.
Week 3: Finally getting a little hard every once in a while, feeling great, don't have to take naps in my car anymore, still doubting this process, people are acting very differently around me and are happier and talking more easily to me.
Week 4: Feel fantastic and healthy, exercising, feel in balance, relationships are really good.
Week 5: Getting impatient with everything, some semi-hard penis days, and some soft days, have gotten a little hard randomly, i am more emotional about things and more aggressive with people, I actually feel like I am contributing something positive to the world in my own way.
Week 6: Got hard at night like 5 nights in a row.  Can get hard in the morning with some kegels.  Starting to believe in all this. I've had 2 sleepless nights over the last 6 weeks which is highly unsual for me.
Week 7: Feel great as usual.  Completely angry and frustrated that things are not better than this.  I've stopped getting hard in the nights and mornings. I have no confidence in getting hard.  There is no response from the penis ever.  GRRRRR!  I am deflated emotionally. Regardless, I am still going forward.  Week 8 starts today.

The temptation has been there throughout the whole process.  I've had two 15 minute relapses watching porn b/c of popup and irresistable urge to test it but then i stopped looking.  I still have fantasies in my head from time to time.  I have not masturbated once in 7 weeks.  The hand has been completely off the penis.

I am in a serious phase of doubt.  Serious helpless doubt.  I was a hardcore long-term porn user so maybe it's going to take a long time to rewire.  

Does anyone think things will come around with me and that there is hope for me?

[MovingOnUp]

I'm sure it will continue to improve. The damage is deeply ingrained and maybe improvements come in waves. I am fine for the first 5 days. but it's between day 6 and day 10 that suddenly masturbating seems rational and I block out the main agenda of abstinence. Sometimes I feel so frustrated that I succombed that I just have a binge for the night and following day. But I succombed yesterday too, only day 8, but will try not to do it again. You've done really well to get that far. But from reading yourbrainonporn.com and other sites it seems it can take anywhere from 2 months to 6 months to a year of rewiring. I do think you should masturbate every now and then, but more lightly (stroke-wise) and to the feeling/imagination as oppose to visual pictures and videos. Maybe do so every 2-3 weeks at least to release some tension. It's also retraining you to do it with less stimuli which should help when being alone with a girl.

[palpateit]

Yes, you will continue to improve. However, the healing process is not linear. Why that is so, I don't know.

The men on our forum have stories and paths very similar to yours. I can't say how long it will take to have consistent erections, as everyone is so different. As movingonup said, your brain is strongly wired to get excited for porn. You are rewiring your brain, which is the same as learning any skill - some days are better than others.

Also, there are certain chemicals associated with addiction (DeltaFosB) that stick around for at least 8 weeks, and maybe longer. It takes time for the reward circuitry to normalize its chemistry.

If you feel that you need to masturbate, then do so with a few things in mind:
1) Do not use porn - that is number one
2) Focus on the sensation
3) Watch for the all or none effect, or chaser effect. The urge to escalated to more masturbation, and to porn.

Here's an article: “How I Recovered from Porn-related Erectile Dysfunction”
http://yourbrainonporn.com/how-i-recovered-from-porn-related-erectile-dysfunction

Here's an another article: As Porn Goes Up, Performance Goes Down?
http://yourbrainonporn.com/as-porn-goes-up-performance-goes-down

Here's some accounts from others going through withdrawal that may be helpful:
http://yourbrainonporn.com/rebooting-accounts

Here are several questions and answers about porn recovery (with accounts and links)
http://yourbrainonporn.com/ask-us

Keep going, no matter what happens, this a process

[itsjustforfun]

Thank you for your quick responses and reassurance!  If anyone else wants to add more advice, I'm sure it benefits more than just me.

Things are certainly better but the fact that the results are not steadily better as time goes on is what really messes with my head.  It's up several days, down several days, up several, etc.  

I am going to continue and I now feel a renewed strength.  I will continue w/o any MB at all b/c I think it will be easier for me at this time (and of course i will continue with no Porn).  

I look forward to posting my success story.  This is an important forum for me.  I visit it almost daily.  I appreciate everyone's postings and help.

[eldopa]

Yeah, when it comes to the "rewiring" process for your brain, it makes sense that total abstinence will be the absolute fastest to complete this theoretical process.  But in the long run, youre going to masturbate, and youre going to have to do it in a different way than you have been doing (I am basically talking to myself right now but I think applies to other people on here).  Less compulsively, most likely less frequently, and (for me at least) NEVER WITH PORN.  So I am sort of starting to "practice" how to masturbate like a normal person now.

Also, if I feel myself becoming really close to using porn and getting off to it, I can "abort" this urge by turning out the lights and doing it to fantasy in my head.  Sure, it is not as pleasurable at this point, but it takes away the urge enough to get my mind off porn and usually fall sleep.

Lastly, if youre not having sex with someone somewhat regularly, it is good for prostate health to occasionally get fluids moving down there.  There has been some retrospective studies on prostate cancer in this regard, but I'm not sure if it is commonly accepted as of now. Not trying to start any debate on this here, just throwing it out there if anyone is interested.

Night

[Marmar101]

This forum has really help put things into perspective. I have not masturbated in about 5 days and had a moment of weakness with porn tonight. I know I have to control the urges in order to get through this process cause it's only a matter of time before I go back to my old ways. Based on what I read I have to go cold turkey for at least 6 to 8 weeks to reprogram my brain and sensitivity for my D. I cant continue to perform less than par sex with my wife cause of my addiction to porn. We use to have a great sex life but it all went down hill when I got hooked to porn. ED can really effect your confidence. I need to get through this for my wife and my own mental stability. The good thing about this forum is it helps to get all of this BS off your mind. It's really hard to talk to someone about this without being embarrassed.

[Iamjason]

Thanks so much for articles.

It helps a lot to read supporting articles because believe me there is a lot out there that says porn isn't the problem at all.

When i get the urge I come on here to post or read an article or video you posted. by the end of it the urge is gone. I'm going on almost two weeks now with no porn watching. I've masturbated maybe twice in those two weeks, but tried to think of real life situations. I've noticed small changes already like hvaing morning erections again and random erectionns when i see a pretty girl. I seriously didn't have those for almost 2 years during the worst times.

It'll take some time I know.

[WhatzWrongWithMe]

I have discovered something... but before telling u, i'll explain my situation.

I am 25 (going on 26), with g/f, i've been a heavyweight porn user since 15-17 y/o, dunno for sure... feels like forever.
I used to be REALY good in bed with my ex (like 3 years ago).. but she was realy openminded and we actualy "played" in home-made-porn-movies... so i had no problems... but we broke up... been alone for 2 years... just me and the porn...
Now i have a g/f... she is realy understanding... i care about her but i'm not inlove unfortunately... i don't feel the... butterflyes...
We've had realy big problems with ED... she felt like she's not enough... we almost broke up...
I've used some pills thinking i have a phisical problem... they helped for a while... recovered some confidence... then the ED came back... one night i could perform.. the other i couldn't... didn't know what was the problem !!!

After discovering this forum, and articles related to porn induced ED... i decided to quit porn AND masturbation !!!
(i'm in my 2'nd or 3'd week i believe)
and now... the thing i discovered:

IT'S PORN !!!!!!!!! PORN IS THE PROBLEM !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I have no problems with my g/f now !!!! Everything works perfect... Some mornings i wake up with wood... some others i don't... some nights i can't go to sleep because i'm hard as a rock... some others i'm sleeping like a baby... so i dunno... hope it nevere goes back to the way it was before...

no more porn for me... even if the urges are huge !!!

It pisses me off that i'm not inlove right now... i saw a chick today... maaaan she was HARDCORE !!! ...why did i want her more and my gf less ? ...yeah i know... it's porn again ! :(

anyways, if you have doubts: IT IS PORN !!! so stop it !!!

[palpateit]

It's great to hear the good news. Keep on going.

Even if you use porn again, simply say "that was that", and start anew. Don't beat yourself up.
Each time you say no porn you are rewiring your brain - it's true. You are creating a new pathway in your brain for conscious control. At the same time the porn pathways are weakening.

That said, this process is not a straight line- healing is usually non-linear. Urges may get really strong and come out of nowhere.

Finding an active forum might be helpful. I'm glad our site is helpful, that's why we made it.

[Klueless]

Keep it up.  I have been working at it too.  I have the same exact experiences with good days and bad days.  One day I feel horny the next very docile.  Very aggravating.  I just deleted my entire porn collection the other day (about 450 GB of xvids) although I was rarely watching them anymore.  Figured it would be good to cut the ties completely.  The same as you I have been wondering if this will work or what.  Although I have still  been having sex ever so often.  I can't tell these women NO!  Although I am not able to perform as I once was and have failed on occasion which wasn't good for my psyche.  

[Marmar101]

Its funny you mention the 450G of porn. I have the same on an external hard drive and have been thinking about deleting it. My rationale for keeping it is once I get back to normal then maybe I could watch it every blue moon...just like an addict.

[Klueless]

Yeah I know what you mean.  I kept mine on an external hard drive in storage. I had been holding on to it for more than a year now without watching it much.  It was hard to part with the collection.  EXTREMELY hard.  Now I better get back to normal cause I didn't get rid of the HEADSTASH for nothing!

[hopingforsomething]

wow is all i can say, i just read every post on this, and wow is all that comes to mine.  i'm a 24yo attractive male with this problem too.  i've never had a problem finding girls and have had a good number of partners from losing it at 16 to 23.  i was in a serious relationship for about 2 years and after that i hit my dry spell.. dove deep into porn everyday/multiple times a day..  since the break up i've tried to be sexualy active with three people all veyr attractive.. the first, i would get it up for a little then lose it, the second, i stayed hard but when i think about it was most likely because it she was just using her hand which i was fimilar with the feeling .. and the last was a few month relationship and when ever it would go to anything other than a hand i would go soft..  after reading all the posts i guessing the hand was the common connection to me staying hard.. so after reading all of these stories you guys have posted i'm going cold turkey, i hope it works, i'm too young and should be in my prime, wish me luck

[WhatzWrongWithMe]

yup... our brain is used to big-breasted-hot-chicks and our penis is used to hand-grip... that's just wrong! let's switch things up a bit...

the only things that will ever go near my penis will be 2 types of lips: facial lips and "vaginal lips" :P

never imagined porn and m/b could do so much damage... i thought it would improve me... instead it made me awful in bed. thank god i found out.
keep on "recovering" guys... this thing is beatable! you're not impotent so stop worrying!

[Marmar101]

I've come to the realization that it's harder to give up porn than it is to masturbate. I think I can obtain from masturbation for awhile but its going to be difficult to stop looking at porn. How long does it take for the urge to look at porn goes away? I understand porn can affect the visual stimulation of arousal so it's important to stop but it is very difficult. This forum helps to keep me focus with I feel the urge to look at it. It's only been 1 day since I looked at porn so I'm assuming it will get easier a week or so from now.

[palpateit]

Giving up porn is the key.
Do not fool yourself into thinking that if you watch porn and you don't masturbate, it's no problem. Definitely do not edge to porn.

For five years we have been hearing from men with porn-induced ED, and none them have been succesful by stopping masturbation, and continuing porn.

Most young men need a historical perspective here. Guys have been masturbating forever, but it wasn't until free, high-speed, Interent porn arrived that guys got ED. It's porn overstimulating your brain. The medical profession has not caught up. They think all maturbation is equal. Most know very little about the latest addiction neuroscience.

How long does it take to recover fully? It depends on many factors, such as - health, age. and most importantly the extent of your addiction. Which means, how long you have been using porn, how often and the variety of porn used.

This last one - variety of porn - means how far have you escalated into really kinky, violent or fetish porn. The guys who have escalated into places they never imagined have the toughest time. Why? Because the have rewired their brains to get excited (dopamine) for the novelty of extreme genre. They can no longer get excited by the old genre of porn.

It can 2 months or longer depending on your addiction. It is highly, highly variable though.

[Marmar101]

Thanks for the information. I haven't graduated to kinky porn just the standard Internet porn but it's still just as addictive. For the past 5 years i was looking/ downloading porn on a regular basis prior to that it was just occasionally.

The key is to reprogram the brain to a normal rationale state of sexual stimulation like you mentioned. Your right that there was never an issue before until I got in grossed with Internet porn. I wish I would of join this forum before I got caught up with porn but I believe it's not too late to recover. The good thing is since I join this forum I now believe that I can overcome this issue with the proper discipline/patience. I'm not as down on myself like i use to be.

Other than therapy there are really no outlets besides this forum to connect with other people dealing with these issues. It really helps to hear other people perspectives and success stories.

[locomom]

Ive been posting on another thread on this site, but I saw this one and I figured Id post on here too.  Here is my post a couple weeks ago:

I am 28 and have been masturbating to porn since I was probably 12.   (I must also admit, my appetite for more hardcore porn also increased during the years, and I searched for more hardcore scenes to get my fill)  I am a good looking guy, good job, have everything going for me except one pretty big problem that has plagued me for a really long time now.

Over my 20's when I was sexually active, I noticed having major anxiety when I would get close to having sex with a new girl.  This would cause me not to get hard, or go soft while having sex, which obviously is embarrassing as hell.   Whats happening now is that the embarrassment has caused me to shy away from even trying, for fear of it happening again.  
I think more importantly though what I have noticed is that I am not completely turned on when I am with a "new girl".  Like my brain is not telling me to get excited down there, cuz you have a new hot girl in front of you.  Its an absolute mystery to me, because I am not gay.  This has made me very depressed at times, made my friends question my sexuality, and turn down countless amounts of attractive girls.  More importantly Ive lost interest in pursuing girls, because I can just satisfy myself at home, which I realized brings me further into this hole.

A light bulb kinda went on in my head after reading posts, is that its gotta be from the porn and masturbation throughout the years.   I am perfectly hard when I jerk off, so its not a physical thing.  But what I think I have done to my brain over the last decade by watching porn and masturbating is condition it to be aroused to porn and not real women, hence loosing my craving in pursuing a mate.
And so my desensitizing process has began,  I will no longer watch porn,  and will refrain from masturbating as long as I can.  Already gone 12 days.   I am rebooting the hardwire in my mind, I know it will be tough, but to me I have tried everything else (viagra, cialis, hypnosis with a psychiatrist, etc).   Its kinda funny, because I always thought that this way a problem deep down inside of me that I had no control over, but I finally feel like theres hope that I can gain control over this situation.   This feels right honestly   I only wish I had discovered this 10 years ago.   I will check this site from now on and give you all updates.  

[locomom]

Heres is my progress as of today:
Figured Id give a post on my progress.  Its been 5 weeks no P/M.  I was with my first chick last night since trying this.  Let me describe her first, not normally my type, but very pretty, nothing very extra ordinary in the body dept, *** kinda lacked (which is my favorite part of a chicks body).   As for my situation, we had gotten back from the bar at 3 AM, I was pretty drunk and tired.  We made out for a bit, but I really felt no horniness whats so ever.  I dunno if it was the alcohol, my tiredness, or just if this girl wasnt my type, but I felt nothing down there.   I would like to blame it on the alcohol, or tiredness, but I know if the circumstances were the same, and I was with my Ex, I would have been horny.    I must also say for the last 5 weeks that I feel like my limido has totally gone away, I figured a chick might do the trick, but nope, not yet at least.
Whats annoying here, is I want to like this girl.  I went out on a date with her already, and we did have a intellectual connection.  This chick is everything you would want as far as a gf, but it doesnt seem to matter to my penis.  I want to start being less picky, but its like my **** doesnt want to respond to a chick unless she has all the physical credentials im looking for.  Its ridiculous I know, but I feel so powerless over what stimulates me.  Anyway, Im gonna stick with the program.  It looks like its gonna take me longer than I thought to get through this.  Does anyone have any opinions or thoughts?

[palpateit]

I'm not at all surprised that you are still not back after 5 weeks. 16-17 years of masturbating to porn is an awful lot of stimulation for the brain. Of course, the actual amount of stimulation depends on frequency and extent of extreme porn.

Nearly every guy with ED feels like a flat tire when they stop porn, because their brain is sensitzed to porn. This means that nerves have wired together to give you a big blast of dopamine in the reward circuit. Nothing elss can match porn, for now.

It will take at the least 8 weeks. But it may take longer, and there will ups and downs in libido and penis sensitivity. Those that recover the fastest, stay away from masturbation. Never fanatsize, if you do masturbate - only go with sensation.

It will come back, but it is hard to estimate a time frame.

[WhatzWrongWithMe]

after 3 weeks (or so) of quitting porn i can finaly say i'm good in bed again!!! it feels great! it makes me happy i can make the girl next to me moan! i'm not inlove with her either... i'm not that into her phisicaly... she's not "pornstar-material" like i've been used to... but i can now please her which pleases me and gives me great confidence!
you can now argue that i've been bragging but i assure you needed to read that! yes! when your urges get realy intense you will have to choose: do i wanna jerk off to images for the rest of my life... or do i wanna have sex at some point in my life with a real woman ??? you can go either way... it's your life... but at one point you'll need someone by your side and porn just won't do... that's when suicidal-thoughts might (or will) come to mind.
the reason why i've been "bragging" is to let you know that IT IS possible... you CAN overcome this. you CAN be great in bed again. you can make your own real-life porn movies. and you CAN make yourself irresistable to the woman next to you!

it took me 3 weeks... maybe my brain forgets quicker, i dunno... i realy forget things, alot... so i dunno... maybe my problem was not that big... but there is no doubt in my mind that porn was the problem... it might take you 3 months... one year... who knows? it will all worth it in the end.

I also have urges... i'm also curious to see a perfect, voluptuous, beautiful pornstar in her latest scene... last night i even dreamt i was watching porn... that's when you know you are/were addicted! but at any moment of the day... sex will always be better than masturbation !!! for me at least.
so? do you want to "rock" some chicks life in the future? or do you want to lie to yourself and to your body that you're having sex with a pornstar ?

you know now it can be done, the question is if you're willing to do the hard thing and quit porn / mb ?
good luck!

[Marmar101]

It's been about 10 days since i masturbated a couple of days since I watched porn and already I'm starting to feel a difference with the sensitivity of my D. Last night my wife and I did everything but intercourse (b* and tt f****) b/c she had a cesarean so I cant penetrate for 6 weeks. It's giving me time to heal my body and so for it's working. There wasn't any limb moments w/my D which was not always the case. I was getting natural woodies prior to a B* like i use to before all this BS happen.

It has inspired me to continue to abstain from P and M. My goal is to go at least 8 weeks w/ no P and M to allow my D and mind to heal.

I really believe that porn ED is psychological and can be beaten if you go cold turkey for at least 6-8 weeks.

[MovingOnUp]

Great to hear the positive stories and stories about self-discovery.

I myself abstained for never longer than 10 days. I recently had a porn binge to get it out of my system so to speak, as flashbacks kept luring me in. Only been 2 days now of abstinence, I'm just hoping what I've learnt so far can be implemented to prevent me justifying watching porn again as once the mind goes a bit foggy it's difficult to be logical. A bit like when we know we shouldn't eat chocolate but indulge anyway.

But I really want to see what the outcome is after 2-3 months. I just need to remember the main point somebody mentioned above; do you want to masturbate to porn all you life or do you want to have actual sexual relations with a woman. If I can remember that conundrum, then hopefully I'll think logically and refrain from masturbating.

I will tell people, don't think you can stroke it for a bit and just stop, as that's what I did. Most of the time when I did it my sensitivity was uncontrollable and I'd ejaculate without a chance to stop it, which was great, but took me by surprise and then I realised I would have to start all over again on the abstinence - which would make me think ' Well, I've already masturbated and orgasmed now and I didn't get to enjoy it as it snook up on me, so I may as well just binge on porn for the next day or so before starting again'. This has happened a few times and is hard to beat, so just be aware.

Good luck.

[Marmar101]

This addiction can easily get you back on the wrong track if you let it. It doesn't take much to get back to the old ways b/c there is so much material with beautiful women with amazing bodies which is not the norm. Everyday for me is a struggle b/c my brain is so use to seeing these unrealistic images. Control the urges b/c once you start it's going to be difficult to stop. Sometimes I get tempted to P/M especially if im not getting no action from my wife. I know my hand can not replace the warmth of pu***. I'm really hoping that as long as I stay away from P and M my D will make a full recovery. So far so good.....

[Klueless]

In my experience the alcohol was horrible for me.  My erections were better when I laid of the alcohol. I don't know how it works in others but for me alcohol is a no no (yet my dumb *** still drinks occasionally)!

[perpetter]

Its almost a month since I stopped watching porn and masturbating, as mentioned earlier I was able to get off from a ******* within about 10 days. Now a month later, I have also been able to have intercourse... sure it was a bit too quick... but I'm still happy that it didnt get floppy before insertion.
Now to get over the performance anxiety :P
I have masturbated twice lately, but without porn, and with hardly any pressure, and I am able to get off doing that as well, something I wasnt before :) but I will be keeping it to a minimum.

[WhatzWrongWithMe]

oh crap... the thing i was afraid of... as somebody said earlyer... the recovery isn't linear... i am "weak" in the sack again... :( what the hell happend... i was hard as a rock last week... and now, nothing ??? i'm back where i started...
and no porn or mb this month... wtf? i'll keep on going... hopefully it will pass...
it freaks me out... why is my body not respondig ??? :((

[anchorhead]

Hi guys,

O         /O\
/I\__     /00\
/\           /\

Sorry that was just to get your attention, there are a ton of posts on this thread (all of which I've found really helpful in my issue, calming too) and I'm just hoping someone can to respond to me as soon as I can.  The next paragraph is some background info, my actual question is the next one.

I've been with my girlfriend for 3 months and while she's been able to give me a *******, we've never been able to have sex for more than a couple of second because I go soft way too quickly.  This has started my downward spiral into ED, mainly anxiety caused I thought at first.  This girl is amazingly attractive, amazingly funny, and amazingly caring.  She and I both thought it was something that would go away with time, but the other day when we were getting intimate I began to think about the prospects of sex and instantly my penis went limp.  She felt hurt by it I could tell, and I was upset.  It was so soft she couldn't even give me a *******.  She feels it seems like I'm unattracted to her, or she just doesn't turn me on.  That couldn't be farther from the truth.  That night I did some research, and realized I had a porn addiction.  For the past 3, 3 and a half years I've been watching porn daily and masturbating frequently.  I no longer get morning wood (not sure where this started) and I find it hard to maintain an erection without serious hardcore porn.  When I'm with her I get hard unless I get anxious (I was a virgin before we met), but I don't come as quickly as when I'm watching porn and I'm not super horny around her even though I want to be closer and I find her extremely attractive..  I told her about my addiction, and she got freaked out.  This put more pressure on me, but the other day (friday, today's sunday) went well and I came a lot during a *******, and this was partly because I was relaxed, but partly because I hadn't orgasmed all week.  Today after I got her off orally, I started to feel anxious, and couldn't get an erection up.  It's been four days since I quit porn and I haven't felt the need to go back to it.  

So my main question I guess (ALL THAT WAS JUST SOME BACKGROUND INFO) is that how long did it take you to get a real erection after quitting porn?  I felt a serious loss of libido in the past couple of days, and I don't know why.  I thought with a lack of porn I'd be so horny she would touch me and I would ***.  Do I need more time?  Is anxiety the real issue?  I really think it's both, but should we just take a break from sex?  I keep telling myself that this will get better in time, but in the back of my head is the idea that this might be too much for her and she'll leave me.  I love her and she loves me, I'm doing this for her but I worry that we could break up over something like this.  This causes more anxiety, which starts the problem all over again.  Whoo.  This is a long post... so anyways any help would be appreciated, and I just want to thank all of you for sharing your stories.  It means so much that you are all out there to support each other, me included.  If you want to talk one on one just message me, seriously.  I'd like to talk to someone who's going through what I'm going through.

Stay strong,

Anchorhead

[anchorhead]

Just to clarify, the stars are probably signifying oral sex.

[anchorhead]

And I'm 18 years old, probably should mention that.

[palpateit]

Finally, some actual research on porn-induced ED

Scientists: Too Much Internet Porn May Cause Impotence
Published February 25, 2011 | NewsCore

It may not make you go blind, but Italian scientists have identified a worrying side-effect of watching too much pornography.

Researchers said Thursday that young men who indulge in "excessive consumption" of Internet porn gradually become immune to explicit images, the ANSA news agency reported.
Over time, this can lead to a loss of libido, impotence and a notion of sex that is totally divorced from real-life relations.

"It starts with lower reactions to porn sites, then there is a general drop in libido and in the end it becomes impossible to get an erection," said Carlo Foresta, head of the Italian Society of Andrology and Sexual Medicine (SIAM).

His team drew their conclusions from a survey of 28,000 Italian men which revealed that many became hooked on porn as early as 14, exhibiting symptoms of so-called "sexual anorexia" by the time they reached their mid-twenties.

There was some good news, however, as the condition was not necessarily permanent. "With proper assistance recovery is possible within a few months," Foresta said.

Other data presented at the SIAM'S annual conference in Rome suggested that Germans are the biggest consumers of online porn in Europe, with 34.5 percent of internet users logging on to watch smut.

France ranked second (33.6 percent), ahead of Spain (32.4 percent) and Italy (28.9 percent).

[hopeful_777]

First I'd just like to say how happy I am that I found guys with the same problem.  It helps so much to know you aren't alone.  I'm 23 now and last year I finally realized what my problem was.  It's a downward spiral guys.  I was exposed to porn at a very young age, 7-8?  idk.  But soon after I began to masturbate and soon after that with the internet coming into our household I was hooked into the mindset of getting off = watching porn and jacking it.  Way before I ever had sex for the first time.  At 18, I had sex for the first time and wasnt able to finish, it just didnt happen.  But I could come home and get on the computer and get er done in like 2 mins. Fast forward 5 years, after a few bad breakups, alot of disapointment in my sex life, depression, anxiety, and simple fear of not performing well with a girl, I've decided this has to stop.  I've met the girl of my dreams and decided I cant let the vicious cycle continue.  Been porn free for about a week, and haven't masturbated either. If you're going to MB, don't use the same techniques.  I think thats one of my major problems, (along with desensitization bc of the porn) is the way you MB.  I've found that I've gotten used to a certain way I MB is the only way that gets me off.  (certain amount of pressure/grip and always using the same hand).  So even if i do maintain my erection, most of the time, I tried to get the girl to just let me finish by MB'ing.  Anyone agree both of these issues tie into eachother?  I've been trying to quit porn for a while, now but after seeing this thread, you've all inspired me to put it in my past for good!  I'm not expecting results tomorrow, but hopefully I can get the confidence I need to have a happy relationship with a beautiful girl.  Good luck to all of you.  

[hopeful_777]

one more thing guys download the pdf that Ryan posted.  Ive only read like 5 pages but its very inspiring and helpful.  I think we all could use it.  Thank you all again for sharing your stories

[Marmar101]

I have been porn free for almost a week prior to that I was looking at porn once a week for about a month. I was gradually reducing my porn usage to make it easier to stop looking at it. I deleted 90 percent of my porn which is a big step for me. It was easier than I thought. Next I'll delete the remaining of it. I haven't MB for 24 days. The sensitivity with my D has definitely improved including morning wood. I need to start exercising more to keep my mind off porn and the daily stressors in my life. My goal is to make it to 6 to 8 weeks no P/M. It makes it easy to not MB when your not watching porn. After awhile it was pointless watching porn when I wasn't MB. Hopefully I will be able to abstain from P/M for good. Everyone has a different method of stopping P/M but for me this is what worked.

[gangsta308]

yo man i get the same problem b 4 the girl takes her clothes off i'm hard as a rock but a while after it just  goes flaccid. When we do oral it gets hard but  after a while of penetration it just goes flaccid again

[eldopa]

yeah its weird how totally naked is so much less of a turnon than clothes on in real life.  i think its because the clothes on leaves room for the fantasy, whereas clothes off is the undeniable truth that it is not a porn star body

[Marmar101]

Check out this link below to get a better understanding of how to get the D back to normal and the best way to do it. I read the info on this link and it touched on some of the things that I was going through. Also, its another success story from someone who stopped P/M and was able to get the D back to normal after 6-8 weeks.

Hope it helps!

http://www.reuniting.info/how_i_recovered_from_porn_related_erectile_dysfunction

[Marmar101]

Another problem with watching porn is it effects your relationship. I told my wife that i joined a forum to help with this problem a few weeks ago and she still holds it against me. It's hard for women to understand that porn is an addiction. I do understand her point b/c I would be upset if it was the other way around.

My wife is another reason why it's important for me to stop P/M.

Sorry for ranting....

[za00]

Hey guys

I posted my story on here a while ago.

It's been about 3 months of no porn for me, and 3 weeks of no quasi-porn materials (for a while I was masturbating to youtube videos of hot girls, going on chatrooms, etc.)

During one period I went 10 days without masturbation, I thought that really helped. During a second period I went 7 days without masturbation and I thought that helped as well.

I'm definitely not 100%. Lately I have been masturbating about once a day and it's not helping. I can't get hard just thinking about sex at this point, I have to masturbate..though it doesn't take too long to get pretty hard once I do. I often fantasize about porn scenarios that I haven't viewed in 3 months.

My question is this.. a lot of you guys seem to say that quitting masturbation altogether for 6-8 weeks makes a huge difference. I think that will be *very* difficult for me to do. After the 10 days I didn't masturbate, I felt incredibly horny for normal, attractive women (I guess that's a good sign that I'm not horribly addicted?)

Anyway, I'm not sure how long I can go without masturbating. Porn is not an issue anymore because I have gotten rid of internet at home (I highly recommend this) and it's just not logistically feasible for me to look at porn.

So how quickly do you guys think I will recover if I just masturbate once a week or so? Is it really going to help a lot if I go 8 weeks with no masturbation, as opposed to masturbating once a week?

I will be hoping and praying for you guys. Porn is a horrible, destructive thing on many levels. At least the pain we go through with porn induced ED will keep us away from it and scare others away, so that we can stop destroying our relationships with women, and reduce the number of women out there that are getting into the porn industry (less demand --> less production) and destroying their lives. Stay strong men.

[someone128]

Hi everyone. At first, when I read this thread, I said it's nothing, or it just can't be it. Then, I started thinking and I said to myself, why not try it. Who knows, porn may be the problem. I'm 24, with a relatively good physical health, no smoking at all, no drinking at all. The only problem was the porn and physical exercises.
After reading this, I went to a fitness. Still, I had troubles to get hard. I was worried about my problem because it was 2 months not getting really hard. For these two months I had sex, but not with full erection, instead, very smooth. Even, I failed to have sex 2-3 times. I went mad about this problem. It just ruined my life in that moment.
Then, after reading this, I quit porn for a week or so. AMAZINGLY enough, I have a morning wood and I see quite an improvement in the sex life. I told my GF the porn 'addiction' and she went mad. Still, she realized that I had a problem and we are OK again.
Guys, QUIT porn at all means. Porn is the trouble to your problems. I quit porn for a week and I see improvements. Come on, it's not that hard to quit porn. Forget those beautiful women in the porn sites; they cannot be ours. We cannot be with them, so, just look at your girlfriend or wife and fantasize having a good sex with her, not with the Internet pornstars.  
Well, thanks alot Bummed_out for sharing your experience. Believe me, you are a life-savior. Porn is the problem to ED.

[anchorhead]

Hey it's been three weeks since I've gone off the porn and I fell off the bandwagon a bit last night and watched some, but I didn't ejaculate.  Still felt a bit guilty but I'm determined now.  I haven't noticed much change since the first two days of quitting, but I'm positive.  That's all you can really be in a situation like this, and even though I don't see any noticeable improvement, the fact that I have quit and I'm hopeful is improvement in itself.  Stay strong.

[someone128]

2 days is not enough to see changes. At least, wait for a week or two. But, no porn, no masturbation, don't think of the ED problem at all and do physical exercises.

[Hertzman]

Dear readers,

I think it will be a good idea for me and my progress to post here and discuss this problem regularly with other people.
I'm a 20 year old guy, I'm quite attractive, work out alot and have a fairly stressfree life. I've been masturbating since I was 11 and have been masturbating to porn since I was about 15. The type of porn got gradually more hardcore to a point where only some really intense stuff would satisfy me.
When I was 19 I had my first sexual encounter with a woman and I noticed a problem that I (obviously) had not encountered before; I was having the greatest difficulty getting an erection. She was a very attractive girl but the only way for me to get hard was for her to jack me off. Then when I was inside her I would just go soft again and that would be it.

Now it is time for a change. I am going to abstain from porn and masturbation for as long as it will take me to regularly get hard during the day (know when you see a pretty girl and you start getting hard, yeah thats what I want to feel again). I am going to post some updates on how my progress is going and what effects I am feeling so far.

Progress as of now: I am 4 days in to my abstinence program and am having some positive but also negative effects. On the positive side; I'm getting morning wood again and I had an erection in the shower while thinking about a girl I met in a shop. The negative effects are: restlesness, craving for porn (and maybe even more a craving to masturbate) and I am having some light headaches.

The sins: I have sinned slightly by masturbating (but not coming) to a video chat room. Hoping that this will not happen again and that I can finally start resetting my brain...

Thanks for reading, it's been kind of weird writing this down but I think it will help me in my progress and hopefully will also help others.

-Hertz-

[za00]

Progress update for me:

Today is day 11 of no P/M

My goal is to make it to April 24 with no P/M, but I am thinking about extending that date later. Until April 24 would be 42 days = 6 weeks.

Week 1 was pretty difficult to get through the first few days, and I was irritable and depressed.

On Day 8 I felt powerful all day. I felt like my D would get hard without even thinking about a girl.

However, Days 9 and 10 were a lull -- I felt weak again, despite not breaking the fast at all.

Still, even though my D does not get hard easily the feeling of hopelessness that I had in the first several days has gone away and I'm generally feeling good.

Today I have internet access with no one home so I felt the first strong temptation to look at porn. But I was able to suppress it, probably because the computer I'm on isn't mine. After today I'll be back to no internet access at home.

[healthysexlife]

My husband and I have been married for 10 years.  Our sex life started out great, we had sex everyday, 3 times a day. He rocked my world like a 19yr old! (he was 25).
But after a couple of months into our marriage I found out about his porn addiction (since he was 10) and his need to watch cable tv and porn on the internet. Our sex life gradually began deteriorating. He was only getting half hard erections (far from the rock hard penis I first knew). I asked him to lay off the porn b/c I wasn't fully satisfied with what he was giving me (I felt robbed of all of him). He'd quit for a couple of months and during which our sex life rocked again.

Over the 10 years he's been honest with me about his lapses in and out of porn. He'd do well for a couple of months sometimes even 3 months. But I could always tell when he'd be looking (wacking) again, even without him even telling me because he'd be half limp and sometimes not even ejaculate.  
So we thought that maybe if we watched porn together to stimulate him it'd help... but then when I'd just start to get aroused and he would ejaculate inside of me pre-maturely!
Also, it's not only a problem with men. I find, for myself, when I masturbate I lose all of my natural flowing juices... so when HE'S READY to have it, I'm NOT!  He has to Lather on the LUBE like crazy and I have to keep stopping to apply more Lube and he'd get frustrated with me. Even with all the lubricant on the outside, It became uncomfortable and even less enjoyable because I would think I'd rather look at porn than be dry and having sex.

I knew the way that his penis COULD be and he knew how naturaIly WET I could be. We'd experienced that many times before, when he'd/we'd lay off the porn.  So we discussed it openly and I shared with him how porn makes masturbating and eating Anus look so glamorous when in real life it's really not that way. (he thought that was funny)!
We've since decided we would both go cold turkey and come to each other to get our sexual needs met instead of masturbating. Neither of us have masturbated for over a month now. The juices are flowing between us and once again and he's back to having the sex drive of a 19 year old! We're having sex 2, sometimes 3 times a day and loving it (and each other).

Your sexual appetite is what you fill your eyes with. We've found when we both fill our eyes with only each other (every little move, every little crease, every little fold of skin) it arouses our sexual appetite. We become WAY MORE turned on by studying each other and can't wait to rip each other's clothes off!

I told him I was reading this article and he's says, "Erectile Dysfunction? you're freaking me out!" But then I told him that my theory was right all along and he agreed. I always knew that when his **** was half-hard or he was limp, that it was because of the porn and he always knew when I'd been masturbating because I would be dry.

Knowledge is Power.  And knowing is half the battle.  
The rest is willpower.  Something we all need to learn.

[joshuaty2010]

I guess some male enhancement products will able to help you. - MensHealthInstitute.Org

[pf44245]

This is so relieving that I am not the only one.  I am a 23 year old fairly good looking male and have no problems getting females.  I had a very hot girlfriend when I turned 21 and the sex was great (also a lot of phone sex which could have contributed to my ED now).  But after we broke up, I went through a 2 year dry spell and I just watched porn and masturbated multiple times a day every day.  I moved to Florida and have since been with two women.  The first one I tried hooking up with when I was drunk and had an erection all the way up until I got my pants off and it just went away.  The 2nd one (now my extremely frustrated girlfriend)  its an extreme hit or miss (mainly miss).  Most of the time I get hard for about 5 minutes of sex and it just goes limp.  So i decided to stop drinking, stop watching porn, and workout.  The immediate success was so amazing I couldn't believe it.  I stayed hard throughout the entire process and even had morning sex.  However, the success was short lived, after about 8 days of no porn all of a sudden i couldn't even get hard at all.  She tried multiple things and it just wasn't going up.  It was like i didn't even want to have sex at all and it threw me into extreme depression.  First thing i did when i got home was watch porn and masturbate to see if i could even have an erection.  This is just an awful awful feeling and I just hope this no porn thing for 6 weeks really will do the trick :(

[palpateit]

For most guys with porn-induced ED it takes 6-8 weeks, but as you experienced the process is not linear. The brain doesn't heal in a straight line like other parts of the body.
If you want to know more (articles,  presentations, and lots of porn recovery accounts) check out my post above with links.
Good luck

[TikTok89]

My ex had a similar problem.  We talked about every possible solution for this.  From plastic surgery to more organic solutions like vitamin routines.  In the end, he got it more under control.  Reducing his time on the computer, focusing more on me, and doing some exercise really helped him.  Re-training the brain is a great way to put it.  

[22ebwlv]

glad I found this thread. I'm older and have been using p for many years. Had a complete separation between p and intimate sex. Too bad that medical people and psychologists haven't caught up to this. I can tell you it's real. Reading a good book called Treating Pornography Addiction by Kevin B. Skinner. Highly recommended.

[manboy]

Hi everyone
I am a 46 year old male and have been masturbating to porn since I was a teenager. I never had a problem with ED until around 6 years ago. The porn I was mb to was playboys etc, static images and not such a big dopamine overload. The problem starts with access to free streaming internet porn and as the connection speed has increased, so has the overwhelming availability to view as much as you can handle.

Basically you end up rewiring your brain to only get aroused by masturbating to porn.

I am in a relationship with a wonderful, gorgeous woman for the last 4 years and have noticed a gradual decline in my libido and a rise in ED. We live apart and only see each other in the weekends because of distance. At first I thought the problem was because we don't see each other often enough and suffer from performance anxiety.

I recently made the connection through google with porn and ED. What a revelation! I felt so excited to have discovered that by just stopping that combination (MB+P) things will return to normal, my biggest fear was telling my girlfriend about it... I hoped that I could get through it without her knowing, as I love her dearly and was worried how she would react. Anyway it all came out because she was really concerned about our lack of intimacy and I felt I owed her an explanation, also some hope. Jeez it was the hardest thing I have had to do, but felt I needed to do as honesty is important to us. Although hurt that feeling she wasn't enough for me, she is understanding and I feel we can move on now.

It has been 2 weeks with no M+P and although I haven't noticed any improvement, I am aware it could take 2 months, more, whatever, its the only way forward.

this link is fantastic. non religious, non judgmental, just the facts. It explains everything you need to know about porn addiction and how to overcome it.

http://yourbrainonporn.com/your-brain-on-porn-series

[bobbyboy85]

Hi guys. I wanted to post reply on here as I feel it would help to communicate with others in my situation and hope my experiences offer some help and reassurance too.

I first noticed I had a problem when I first lost my virginity at 21 (25 now). I was excited by the girl, turned on and she was attractive. All was going well but I was just not hard down there. I was confused as to why this was the case and just put it down to first time nerves. Would be semi erect through help of stimulation too but go soft when inside her. I was like this with my second partner too and worried that this was always happening. This problem continued with my third partner and with my fourth too, whom I had a 3yr relationship with. She was so understanding, we tried all sorts to try help me out, like toys etc but still the problem was there. I tried an over the counter enhancement called Viapro which worked wonders at the time. It enabled me to have 'normal' sex, hard when standing up and I put my problem down to something physical. However then the tablet stopped working. We ended up having tension in our relationship ultimately because of my problem. We ended up splitting up due to other reasons too.

Anyways after plenty of research I stumbled across the concept of pornography standing in the way of a normal function of the penis. It all made sense after that, all the posts on here sounded so similar to my situation. I had lost 'morning wood', random erections, libido was low etc. I had been in the habit of watching porn and masturbating since early teens, on a daily basis sometimes more sometimes less. Thinking back, I used to use it when I felt low I couldn't have proper sex with real women and couldn't understand why I could be hard for porn and not them. So it was a vicious circle and porn was hindering me massively.

Anyway, enough of my life story. Here is my progress so far. It has been around 5weeks since last masturbated to porn. I feel so much more sexually energetic, i have morning wood back pretty much everyday without fail. When I see girls at the shop I work written I feel a genuine attraction sexually to them, not just a logical acknowledgement of their beauty. I get turned on by little things like a sneaky peek at a nice cleavage, a girl bending over and things like the scent of a nice perfume and gorgeous eyes.

Ive yet to test my performance yet but may be getting the opportunity tonight and so will post back with my progress as I feel it will help me to account this and others too hopefully.

Porn is definitely the problem, I have given it up along with masturbating too, cold turkey, and over time noticing very inspiring effects!

[chacrero]

hello guys, reading all the comments i was seeing the story of my life over and over. i am 27 years old and been masturbating since i was prob 10, 11. i always masturbated a lot, at least 3 times a day, sometimes 5, 6. when im watching porn im as hard as a rock, being able to masturbate sometimes 4 times back to back. but when im with a girl it just doesnt work, my **** is dead, no response or reaction. girls try to get it har but even tho i want to **** them, my **** doesnt rerspond. this all been happening for a few years now. With some girls it works after a while or the next morning, but it usually dont work with a new girl, or a girl a just met. It happened again last night, had this beautiful 19 year old at me house, took a class with her last semester in school and since then we kept in touch. last night she came over to hang out, and after an hour of talk we went to my room to "watch a movie". we started messing around and i thought i was gonna get hard, when i started going down on her she told me she squirted, which surprised me cause i never had that happening before. while i was making her come on my mouth my **** was dead. she tried sucking on it and jerking it which did not help at all. I hate this, im starting to avoid to bring girls to bed with me cause i cant stand the embaressement  anymore. before i even start im already worried about my problem and my heart is beating up fast. they end up trying to hang out again cause i know how to pleasure them even without a hard on but that isnt what i want. i want and need to have healthy sex again. this morning i was reading thru some articles and websites and even tho i know its bad i couldnt help myself but jerk off to relax. Please help me out guys. thanks.
porn addicted.  

[manboy]

Its a hard habit to break, I know.. but you have just got to go cold turkey for as long as it takes to get back to "normal" total abstinence leads to faster recovery. I highly recommend you look at the you tube series in my link above. Its good to know why your brain craves porn, how this had lead to your brain being rewired to only respond to porn and how breaking this habit leads to recovery.

The porn industry is an evil, brain numbing, soul destroying ****

If you value wanting a sexual relationship with a real woman STOP NOW

[zhertva]

Chacrero - Manboy is right.  Just do it - give it up and go cold turkey.  It will come back.  I'm 47, been addicted for at least 20 years, and after a week and a half of going without, there was a tremendous difference.  I, like you, would be hard looking at porn, but when it came time to do it for real, I would lose all sensation and stiffness.  I gave up looking and playing with it, and after a while, it will come back.  My wife noticed a difference right away (she didn't know about my looking at porn though).  My girlfriend was happy too!
Try not to do anything that would remind you of sex or porn.  Use your new-found time to educate yourself, read a book, watch a classic movie (they're slower in tempo unlike the newer ones - for instance, if you watch Casablanca, you'll see Ingrid Bergman for the beauty she really is, not just a set of T and A).  Above all, don't try to think about it, or if you do, try to divert yourself into something else (like the above).  I know it will be difficult, but believe me, you'll welcome the outcome whenever it happens.

[mrivera4]

Porn may be a cause of the problem but don't overlook possible medical causes, such as low testosterone or high blood pressure or diabetes. Not only the diseases but the drugs to treat those diseases all seem to have the side effect of causing ED. The most sure fire medical solution is injectable papaverine or something similar. It works no matter what, even when Viagra and Cialis don't. Someone mentioned Propecia - that drug helps your hair but inhibits conversion of testosterone to dihydrotesterone causing - you guessed it - ED.

And maybe you're mixing up cause and effect. Maybe one uses porn because the wife says no to sex all the time. Years of being rejected in bed can give you ED, too, which may be what she was aiming for.

[manboy]

Sure there may be other medical causes for ED. As far as low testosterone being a factor, even babies get erections and their testosterone is almost non existent. Most of the men posting on this forum have had health checks and are also too young for "middle age" heath problems.

The bottom line is Porn + masturbation rewires your brain to only get aroused by this combination. It is sad to hear that a wife would deliberately reject sexual advances just so ED is the outcome... You can try and justify to yourself that looking at porn is some sort of payback for being rejected, but it wont fix ED, or the relationship.

It is far better to get to the root of the problem, you know it is wrong (M+P) especially if you're in a relationship, I know I've been there. Getting an injection of papaverine to get a temporary fix doesn't solve anything, its just a band aid on an open wound.

I think its terrific to most men who view this forum, that by simply abstaining from M+P their sex lives will return to "normal".

Think of how many people the porn industry affects,(besides yourself) from partners/wives/girlfriends, to the people caught up and exploited by this industry including children!

[dart1055]

Well Recently I have been having great sex with my girlfriend, but this week I have encountered a problem where my penis loses its strength in the middle of sex.I am 25y/o, I have no problem getting an erection, before this week, I would last a while until she achieved her orgazams. I will admit that for a long period of time I would be masturbating every day and twice a day. I can say I am addicted to porn. I am trying to stop watching porn and masturbating. Now, I would like to know if my addiction to porn is causing a problem with my sex life. What I do not understand is that I would have no problem achieving an erection nor losing it while in the middle of sex, but lately it has just been that i cannot hold out my erection. Is it because of hormonal changes? or is it because of the addiction of porn?

[manboy]

All I can say from my own experience is, it sounds like your starting to suffer the affects of porn induced ED.

For me sex with my partner was a random event, sometimes great, no problems, then others loosing erections during sex, or not getting it up at all. Once anxiety sets in with the fear of sexual failure, its a slippery slope and won't be overcome if M+P is the only sexual release you have.

You have nothing to loose and everything to gain by stopping M+P. For me its been 3 weeks abstaining and I had sex with my partner last night for the first time in 6 weeks. No problems getting it up at night and the next morning. Its not just the sex either, other more subtler changes are coming through, more affection towards her and more confidence with others.

Its still early days and I know recovery isn't linear, but so far I am totally convinced.

Again I recommend;

http://yourbrainonporn.com/your-brain-on-porn-series

[dart1055]

thanks, I will def stop M+P but my gf wants to have sex and I cannot tell her no. So i figure I will continue having sex with her. Its been 3 days since ive stopped M+P and hopefully it will be better.

[zhertva]

dart1055 - I'm at the 3 week point (of giving up M and P) and have noticed a huge difference.  And this is after 20 some years of M and P thanks to the internet!!  Anyway, as I explained in another blog, giving it up is difficult for the first week or so.  It does get better.  I really have no urge now to look at it, although the thoughts of having sex more often or with others are definitely more pronounced now.  It is a tradeoff.  However, the sex life with my wife is definitely improved.  I also saw my gf last week and no troubles.  This after basically getting no erection at all with another person, only with the computer in front of me.  I'm 47, but a late bloomer.  If it will work at my age, it most certainly will with you.  As for abstaining right now with your gf, I'd suggest doing it for at least 1 to 2 weeks if you can.  Then you may see a big difference.  However, if you don't, don't be discouraged.  Some people can take longer.  I've read these blogs, and some need to go upwards of 2 months before they see a difference.  Bottom line, though, is that most if not all of us here on this blog do see a difference.  Stay strong, lad!

[manboy]

Good on for wanting to stop. Its not an easy road, but believe me its worth it.

I can see your dilemma with your gf. I think it is particularly hard for the people reading this forum and contributing, because most are trying to deal with breaking an addiction alone, usually you have the support of family, friends etc. In my case I told my partner about my addiction, mainly because the lack of sex was becoming a major issue and also because I wanted her to know why this problem was occurring and that there was a remedy. I am not suggesting you tell your gf, its a grey area... but it was a huge wait off my shoulders and although it was an extremely difficult thing to do, she supports me now and things are better than ever.

So keep posting, you have support here. Stay strong you will get through it. The 3 week mark as with zhertva was a milestone for me also. Never underestimate the power of positive thought, keep the vision of what you want firmly in your head, it will happen.

[palpateit]

The time frames for recovery vary quite a bit. Most guys need longer than 3 weeks to recover, so don't be discouraged if it takes longer. As stated, a lot of men need at least 2 months, sometimes longer. Most men "flatline" for a period. Meaning they have no libido. Don't "test" your equipment when this happens, just know it's part of the process.

At the website - yourbrainonporn - under FAQ's,  you will find this question:
Is my erectile dysfunction (ED) related to my porn use?
It has several links, with stories of recovery.

Be aware that the process has lots of ups and downs for the seriously addicted. And know that everyone recovers from porn-induced ED.

[Klueless]

I am at the beginning of week 4 of no ejaculation WHATSOEVER (no sex).  Some morning I wake up with semi hard wood.  I will keep you all posted on the process.  I do not crave porn but I do crave sex and almost gave in to having sex with my ex last week but held out (it was not easy)!  But the cravings for sex come and go with nothing that resembles the erections that I used to have just yet!

[peterpaolo]

hey guys, I am happy to have found this forum, as it affirms my suspicion that my ED problems are related to porn use. I've been off both masturbation and porn for 6 months now, HOWEVER, I'm still having troubles. therefore, I wanted to ask that in order to reboot, is it necessary to stop having sex too for that period of time? to be honest, giving up porn was very easy, as I have been having sex several times a day, and while initially  my penis is hard enough for intercourse, it might happen that I lose the erection after going at it for a bit longer, during switching positions or when we're in a position where my penis is not getting enough friction. is that normal, has that happened to some of you? do I need to give up sex/orgasms completely in order to completely reboot? Thanks for your help! by the way I'm 25 and living a healthy lifestyle.