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Aspergers
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Aspergers

I was diagnosed with Aspergers in January. I was then and still am 26. I have two children with my girlfriend and our relationship is suffering. She believes I don't love her because I never show her my feelings or my love but I just say "I love you". She thinks I just say it to keep her sweet. But I do love her but find it hard being with her for long periods of times as my desire to do my own things buildsup. I like to be in my own room with my own things, such as my computer, my playing cards etc.

My girlfriend wants me to move in with her but the place is all cluttered and messy and when I am there it makes me feel really depressed and unrelaxed. I get up and try to make a start with cleaning it but give up after a minute as I don't know where to start and get stressed with it.

All I think about most of the time is whatever interest I have at the time. At the moment it's card counting at blackjack.

Another reason why I don't want to move in is because of my room. At my parents' house, I have my own room with my own things. The room is set to how I like and I can sit in my room on my own and do my thing without distractions.

Is this my Aspergers or me being selfish?
1 Comment
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Avatar_n_tn
Hi,
    Your issues are mostly due to Aspergers. The main difficulty in such cases is to convince the person of the source of his problems. Since in this case you are aware of the problem, you should be able to take steps to correct it.

Personally, I would think that chasing ardently one's interests in life is a good thing,that is how we can achieve higher goals in life and you need not be overly worried about it. Only thing to be taken care of in this case is to set your goals clear to others, get the support from your family members about your single minded devotion to your interests, even though it is not an easy task to do. So, may be you should discuss with your partner about the diagnosis and seek her support and understanding about your behavior. Once you do that, things will be easy for you to handle. The help from a  common friend or a counselor will be of great value in this case.  You should also spend some of your quality time in their company, even if you may not feel happy to do so in the beginning, may be you should do it as a sacrifice of your inner personal interests for keeping your relations healthy.Over a period, you would learn to enjoy the time you spend for others and slowly you will find the problems themselves disappear.

Good luck,
Solace
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