WHAT HAPPENS IF YOU STOP MASTURBATING - Men's Health

No law states that and you miss my point. My point is, 'if it doesn't simulate you then why watch it'. So I had a suspicion that you were talking crap.

Now you have proved that you tell fibs by your above post as you said quote , “I watch porn sometimes because there is nothing else to do and it gets me hype and really wanting some real sex.”

Yet On October the 12th you said quote, “I still look at porn daily but I psychologically removed all sexual exciteness when watching porn”

These are clearly two contradictory statements. So therefore pinocchio one can not help but think that every thing you say is crap. I don't believe you even have had sex lately or have these so called women ringing you up. I reckon you live in a fantasy land. Maybe you tell yarns because you have a invested (financial) interest in those nappie things you supposedly wear.

Myron_Long

Oct 29, 2010

To: casper00

Get a life dude!
I watch porn daily, PERIOD!
I don't masturbate to porn PERIOD!
I still have sex with my ex and 2 other girls on the side, PERIOD!
I don't masturbate any longer, PERIOD!
My nose did not grow one bit from everything I just said...

casper00

Oct 30, 2010

To: Pinocchio

Dude I got a wonderful life since of stopped pulling my ****** like you.

You never did explain why you stated on one hand that watching porn doesn't sexually excite you yet a few weeks later say the opposite that you watch porn to get hyped up wanting real sex.'

I guess its because you cant jusitfie your fib. You have been caught with your pants down .

Some people come to sites like this really wanting guidance the last thing they need is some clown spinning crap that masturbates to porn in silk nappies' .I cant be bothered wasting my time on you anymore you may have put one over others on this site but all I can see is a immature little virgin waffling crap living in a fantasy land.

Myron_Long

Oct 30, 2010

To: casper00

you're so immature, it's ridiculous.

"You never did explain why you stated on one hand that watching porn doesn't sexually excite you yet a few weeks later say the opposite that you watch porn to get hyped up wanting real sex."

When I use to watch porn + masturbate, I would never achieve a full erection just by watching porn, only when I start to touch myself. This is why I say porn doesn't really sexually excite me like that because if it did, my penis would have a full erection on its own just by watching it. So I started to realize that touching myself to porn was causing me problems with real women because my penis got used to hand stimulation just to get an erection. So I decided to take masturbation out the picture but still watch porn. Now when I watch porn, it excites me to get some real sex because I'm dying to ejaculate. So when I hook up with my ex and my other female friends, my mind is strictly focus on me getting close to them and sexually pleasing myself as well as them. And this method has been working great for me.

So this is why I say it's okay to watch porn but just don't masturbate to it.

I'm not explaining this anymore to you.

Lonewolfof90

Oct 31, 2010

To: Anyone

I can't watch porn and not masturbate. I tried and it only makes me horny and I end up wanking myself! I think that for me porn is something that I cannot watch if I am to completely break the habit! I have been doing other things like reading books or drawing to take my mine off hot naked women! As I type that I got horny!

casper00

Oct 31, 2010

To: Myron_Long (Pinocchio)

Dude you shouldn't have tried to explain yourself because it was impossible to justie the fib now you just dug yourself in a bigger hole.

The full statement said, Quote, “it's easy to stop masturbating. I'm proving it now. I haven't touch myself for a month now. I still look at porn daily but I psychologically removed all sexual exciteness when watching porn”

So you had taken masturbation out of the picture for a month and blowing your horn about how porn no longer simulated you anymore, However, in the above post you are trying to say that you were referring to masturbation + porn. Dude you had given porn up for a mth make your mind up'.

Dude I wouldn't recommend trying to justie your pathetic lies anymore. Dude please don't be offended but before I give up on you I would like to give you some advice, give up on the porn, give up on the fanta flesh vagina, and find yourself a real girl friend those blow up dolls don't count as ex girl friends.

casper00

Oct 31, 2010

To: Lonewolf

I have to agree you lonewolf it is very hard I found the first few weeks hardest. However you have the right idea keep active and don't touch it in the first place. I avoid porn at all costs. Sure I still get impure thoughts and am tempted to touch myself some times however I just acknowledge these thoughts to myself and let them past. 'Yes' I know easier said than done. However the reward is worth it. Good luck

Myron_Long

Oct 31, 2010

To: casper00

EAT A ****! HOW BOUT THAT...
U TALK A LOT OF **** OVER THE COMPUTER!
AND I DO GET MORE REAL ***** (REAL WOMEN) THAN YOU, HOW BOUT THAT!!!
AND I WILL STILL WATCH MY PORN WITH NO MASTURBATION, HOW BOUT THAT!!
AND I BET YOU GO BACK TO WATCHING PORN EVENTUALLY SUCKA!! YOU CAN'T STAY AWAY FOREVER.

Myron_Long

Oct 31, 2010

To: casper00

I just read all your old posts. I figure you out now, you're just talking down on people over the internet. Everything you're saying you would not say in person at least not to me.

At this point, I'm ignoring all nonsense you type under this forum. Have a nice life virgin!

Lonewolfof90

Nov 01, 2010

Hi Myron Long don't get so worked up. If you know you don't masturbate to porn than you don't have to explain yourself to anyone! If you and casper00 keep arguing than the debate will never stop! Both of you have given me good advice and I have found a new strength to quit the habit. None of us really know each other so we cannot speculate what the other is doing behind closed doors. I really like this post and I come here to hear other people's struggles with the habit. For a while, I thought it was just me, but now I know that they are many people, both men and women who are struggling with this "disease"! Lol that is what I call it. I am just 20 years old. I have realized that time goes by much faster than we realize. I don't want to be a 30 year old virgin sitting in front of my computer with fantasy girls. This post should be a discussion of how we are dealing with quitting masturbation and to try to help others quit also! Arguing with each other takes away from the purpose of this forum. You probably won't listen to me, but this is just my opinion of the situation. I hope you two can find a common ground!

Myron_Long

Nov 01, 2010

I agree Lonewolf... I just don't like being called a liar and also being told my method doesn't work when it has been working for me.

I'll ignore Casper (Mr.talk a lot of nonsense behind a computer)

I'll also let everyone know how I'm doing 6 months from now.

Still no masturbation, still watching porn, and still enjoying great sex from real woman.

PEACE!

casper00

Nov 01, 2010

Wow I didn't mean to upset you so much Myron. Thank you very much for ignoring me it is very much appreciated. Any how you still miss my point I don't care if you do masturbate or not. The fact is that you clearly lied (said two opposite statements) it is written in black and white. I'm not going to explain it again. It just makes me very suspicious of everything you say but others can believe you if they like, I don't care.

Thank you also very much for reading all my old posts its nice you have taken a interest in what I say, however I don't believe I have talked down to anyone I believe I got in a healthy debate with someone ( former addict I think his nick was I cant be bothered scrolling) in the end I think we both just agreed to disagree. I welcome different opinions its just two faced fibs that I don't like.

I would also like to point out that you are the one being a keyboard warrior not me. Who threaten who. Myron this is a very sensitive subject that men are embarrassed to talk about its not a game. Next time you waffle lies remember wot you wrote so you don't put your foot in it. Now go hide for six mths.

casper00

Nov 01, 2010

To: Lonewolf

Lone wolf, Its good you are concerned about porn at such a young age most people your age just don't care so you are ahead of the pack. However I wouldn't let it worry you to much. I think the first sexual experiences shapes the future. I had a prostitute shouted for me when I was 19 at the time I had a grin on my face for a week. However when I look back I think it did more harm than good. From then on I saw women more as sexual objects and never really appreciated their inner beauty.

I became addicted to porn and wasted thousands of dollars throughout the years on prostitute's it wasn't until I gave all porn and masturbation up that I really saw the true inner beauty of women . Recently I meet a angel from heaven . Sex with love is beautiful and cant be compared to sex with just lust. Sadly she has gone back to japan because her visa ran out. But I have lots of other women friends in my life now and am not interested in cheap one night stands. My point is wait for the right women, don't be sucked into peer pressure to just get laid for the hell of it, and don't put a time limit on it, who cares if you are still a virgin in you thirty's or whatever age.

Lonewolfof90

Nov 01, 2010

To: casper00

I agree. My main reason for quitting masturbation is because I want to have a healthy relationship with a young beautiful woman. When I would masturbate on my computer the erection and ejaculation felt great, but then after wards I was depressed and realized that there was no one next to me and that it was just a fantasy in my brain. It was like a drug; good while it lasted, but after it was over it left you weak and depressed. When I think about how many opportunities I had with "real women" it makes me want to rip my hair out of my scalp. A lot of so called experts say that masturbation is a healthy and safe way to release sexual tension. However, I know better than that! Masturbation tricks you into thinking that your hand can do for you what a real woman can't and that is so untrue! With this mentality, it causes you to shy away from healthy normal relationships with women and seclude to a quiet spot where you can pleasure yourself. There are no benefits to masturbation! It only makes you weaker and craving for more to get that sexual climax that a vagina is meant for. It took me 5 long years to realize my ignorance and to finally work up the courage to tell my body that this is enough and I want a real relationship with a real woman. I never went as far as looking for prostitutes, but my unhealthy behavior around females was enough to make me take a second look at myself! I believe there is a God and I prayed that he deliver me from this addiction. I am starting to realize that there are more important things in life than just sex. Don't get me wrong, I like sex and I want to have sex with that special woman someday,but right now I need to focus on other things and retrain my mind to how it was before I got into masturbating. So far I feel more energized and I can look women in the face instead of at their boobs. I cannot say that I don't have the urge because sometimes I get really horny and just really want to masturbate. However, I just tell myself that if I keep doing this I will not change and will never have a relationship with a real woman. Exercising and doing a hobby help keep me focused and so far I have more energy when I wake up. I feel sorry for your love who had to go back to Japan. I pray that you will be reunited with her someday because true love is really a thing of beauty! I will continue my abstinence and let you know if anything new happens or if I meet that special woman. Til then I wish you all the best and everyone else on this forum! Take care!

Former_Addict

Nov 02, 2010

To: Everyone

I just wanted to say that I don't think Myron Long is lying and that he is telling the truth.  I think people need to realize that there is a difference between masturbating through visualizing, watching porn without masturbation and masturbating with porn.  Doing each of these things have different effects on your body and mind in varying degrees, to put them all on the boat is not fair.

Masturbating just by visualizing you are only getting stimulation mainly from the ejaculation as there are chemicals released into your brain.  This does tax the body heavily especially if you do it everyday and affects you mentally due to the decreased testosterone and the calming effects of the mild chemicals released in your brain.  On its own it is not particularly damaging to your mind and body, but it does make you lazy and tired especially if you do it everyday.  If you do this less frequently, like about once a week, most of these negative effects will not even be apparent except the day after you masturbate.

Watching porn without masturbation you do get stimulation and a sense of rush which is your testosterone and dopamine being released.  It doesn't have any effect on the body, and the effect on the mind is one of excitement and adrenaline.  This may tax the mind heavily especially if you watch it everyday because of the increased testosterone and adrenaline.  However on its own it is not particularly damaging to your mind and body, but it can make you nervous and jumpy especially if you do it everyday.  Very few guys actually do this because it is very difficult for most of them to watch porn without masturbating.

Watching porn with masturbation is an incredible intense experience because you are getting a simultaneous chemical rush of testosterone and serotonin.  This will give you a lot of pleasure for 10 minutes especially after ejaculation.  When you are done with this, it will be extremely taxing to the body and mind especially if you do this everyday because of the high amount of varying chemicals being released into your brain.  Altogether this is incredibly dangerous and damaging to your mind and body, and it can make you nervous and depressed especially if you do it everyday.  After several years of this habit, you will begin to show traits of drug addicts.

I've been continuing with the once a week of masturbation and so far it's been working well.  It's definitely keeping me attracted to women and keeps me engaged enough to talk to women.  I do have a lot of energy and feel great 6 of the 7 days of the week.  I do feel a little relaxed and down after the day I do it, but I'm back to normal the next day and slowly feel my testosterone and energy heighten as the days pass by.  Plus I haven't watched a porn video in more than 5 months and I definitely mentally more sharp and more sensitive to everything around me since I quit.  I do plan to quit masturbation completely in the future when I feel ready or get a girlfriend, but until then I will continue this habit in a controlled fashion, as it does keep in balance the heightened energy of no masturbation and the stress reduction of masturbation.

Lonewolf, I recommend you try doing the once a week habit after you go 30 days without masturbating because you'll experience the heightened energy of no masturbating and the stress reduction from masturbation.

casper00

Nov 02, 2010

You also miss my point I think every one got masturbation on their mind for some reason, that wasn't my point.. Really this is getting boring, masturbation definitely  kills the brains cells that's for certain..He said after stopping masturbation for a mth that he watches porn with no psychological sexual exitness yet just a couple of weeks later he  is saying it sexually simulates him. So I not talking about the physical act of pulling one's ****** I,m talking about the psychological  effects (mental, cognitive) he lying about.. Two different contradictory statements. Also if you think that a red blooded male than hasn't had sexual relief for a mth (masturbated) can watch porn and not be sexually stimulated  (psychologically) like he said the first time I think you should wake up and smell the roses.

You and me were debating about a whole different topic and I still disagree with you because I have seen enough porn and experienced enough sexual situations that I really don't need to see porn. You don't know how some people visualize compared to others it could debated that the brain uses more neurotransmitters forming mental pictures compared to just seeing them.. Sure porn  internet/mags is worse in the respect that people get used to a seeing a naked women and  so need more explicit martial to get the same results  (like any drug) but that's about the only reason, really I think its splitting hairs which is why I gave up debating about it. It's like so what, The point is both paths lead to the same result which is masturbation.

I believe Masturbation is a lot worse than what people think this forum in itself has shown how masturbation makes it hard for people to deduce information. You recommend wanking once a week former addict thinking it harmless but perhaps it's doing  more harm to you than you think. Personally I don't think you have the right to recommend masturbation once a week just because you think its working for you doesn't mean it will work for some one else.

Lone wolf you have your head screwed on right  I wish I had your insight at your age. Listen to your innate feelings and pray to god  for guidance you doing fine. I'm fast losing interest in this forum,Seems like a total waste of time and head space, Good luck.

Myron_Long

Nov 02, 2010

To: casper00

I know I said I was going to stay away but I have to comment on this and lets not turn this into a heated argument and please do not throw any insults...

"He said after stopping masturbation for a mth that he watches porn with no psychological sexual exitness yet just a couple of weeks later he is saying it sexually simulates him. So I not talking about the physical act of pulling one's ****** I,m talking about the psychological effects (mental, cognitive) he lying about.. Two different contradictory statements. Also if you think that a red blooded male than hasn't had sexual relief for a mth (masturbated) can watch porn and not be sexually stimulated (psychologically) like he said the first time I think you should wake up and smell the roses."
---------------------

I stopped masturbating for a month because I was wearing, and still is, this silk garment called "the manhood". this garment is designed to protect a circumcised penis from rubbing against your clothes on a daily basis and also helps to regain penis sensitivity.

During that month, I still watch porn because I love to watch porn but since I had on the manhood I had no urge to masturbate because I needed to see if the manhood would work after wearing it for a month.

But when I do watch porn, I get erections on and off, never steady, and I actually enjoy the fact that my penis gets erect to porn AND I can control myself by not touching it. The reason I say that porn doesn't really give me that much sexual exciteness is the fact my erection is on and off (not steady). But YES I do get some psychological effects from it.

Now, that I have build self-control over watching porn with no masturbation, my urge for real sex is off the roof. When I hook up with one of my female friends, my confidence to get close to her sexually has significantly increased compare to back then I had a lot of performance anxiety issues. I was so use to touching my penis that now I yearn for a female to touch my penis during foreplay.

When I had real sex after a month of wearing my manhood and watching porn with no masturbation, I felt a HUGE DIFFERENCE IN SENSATION when I used the latex condom. In fact, I reached an orgasm but I HAVE NEVER EJACULATED THRU A LATEX CONDOM in my past because I could never feel any sensation.This result right there made me vow to never masturbate again and to continue wearing my manhood and as long as I keep wearing my manhood I can never feel the urge to masturbate to porn.

THIS IS MY REMEDY SO TO EACH'S OWN-MY METHOD IS TREMENDOUSLY WORKING.

casper00

Nov 02, 2010

Its not what you said, you have changed it to suit. I could have picked it apart , copy and pasting , pointing out the flaws/differences but honestly I cant be bothered I lost interest way back, its got really boring. A word of advice don't let wont any one says on the net get to you its not worth it. I just find inconsistencies annoying. I am a straight up person, its the way I am, even to a persons face. There I behaved, it was hard but I did. I deserve a star

Former_Addict

Nov 02, 2010

To: casper00

Well, casper00, I see your point that myron long contradicted himself, but it still doesn't definitely prove that he lied, all it proves is that he contradicted himself and made a bad argument.

Masturbation kills brain cells...haha are you kidding me? The majority of people in this world masturbate at least once a week, so are you saying most of the people living now are brain dead?  It doesn't kill brain cells, masturbation just taxes the body, porn is what kills brain cells because of the unnatural amount of chemicals being released into the brain like drugs do, there is a lot of scientific evidence to support this.  If your going to make a claim at least back it up.

You have to take into account that myron long has sex frequently, so porn will not have as powerful of an effect as someone who never gets laid.  Also, he probably just watches porn to get himself prepped for real sex shortly after watching it, so obviously he doesn't need to masturbate to it.

The human body is designed to have sex occasionally at least, even when your having sex you are still masturbating, but inside a woman.  That's a load of crap about forming more neurotransmitters from thinking about sex rather than seeing it, that's like saying I get more sensation from thinking about music rather than listening.  Do you even believe the nonsense you spew?

Masturbation only strongly affects the mind if you do it frequently that it never recovers and that's more than 3 times a week.  I have the right to recommend masturbation once a week just like you have the right to recommend no masturbation ever, both of our arguments are subjective and neither hold any weight over the other.  Lonewolf has the right to believe what he wants and make his own decisions for himself.

The only reason you're losing interest in this forum is because most people don't readily accept what you say.  How could they? You just say things and never back them up with any actual proof.  If you want to be taken more seriously, provide a rational explanation with scientific evidence rather than just making sweeping claims with nothing but hot air to hold it up.

Myron_Long

Nov 03, 2010

"You have to take into account that myron long has sex frequently, so porn will not have as powerful of an effect as someone who never gets laid. Also, he probably just watches porn to get himself prepped for real sex shortly after watching it, so obviously he doesn't need to masturbate to it. "
------

Thank You Former, I would say this is true except for sex frequently. Right now, I don't have a steady girlfriend so averaging real sex like twice every 2 weeks which is not consider frequently to me, LOL...

Besides that, ULTIMATELY, I no longer masturbate to porn because I believe as soon as I do, I will go right back to not maintaining my erection during sex, not feeling enough penis sensation from the vagina, not feeling any sensation at all with a latex condom, not feeling that ticklish feeling when a woman rubs my penis and not feeling that much sensation in the penis head when I get oral sex.

Right now, I am experiencing the complete opposite of all those issues so I'm loving my life to the fullest right now. My whole life, I never experience sex to feel so great with a latex condom. I am proud to tell women now that I practice safe sex. I feel like GOD has answer my prayers, even though this would be consider a sin I am asking from GOD. I just wanted to be normal like all other healthy sexual men and now I have it.

I AM NEVER GOING BACK TO THE OLD ME, THE GRASS ON THIS SIDE IS SO MUCH GREENER.

casper00

Nov 03, 2010

Wow Lone wolf did the penny finally drop, will done you can now sit in front of the class. I only said it countless times making it simpler each time. Honestly I feel like I'm in a room with a couple of primary school kids. Also don't you even know that 'contradiction' is just a polite way of saying 'lying'  (I guess not figures) . I can also clearly see that you couldn't figure I was being sarcastic to you when I said 'masturbation kills the brain cells' and not stating any clams as you profuse. Try to look at a statement in the context of the paragraph, its  primary school english..

Also I didn't claim that more neurotransmitters are used when visualizing seeing porn as opposed to thinking about it. I said it could be debated that this is the case.. Don't you even know what debated means (I guess not figures).  BTW your comparison is deeply flawed.  Because you use two completely different parts of the brain hearing and thinking, as opposed to my comparison where both are forming mental pictures to the brain so in a indirect way are similar. I guess you cant figure that out either'

So therefore you should be able to figure out (I bet you cant) that I didn't claim anything so didn't have  a claim to back up. However you made some ridiculous claims with no scientific evidence to back it up. For example masturbation and sex in a women being the same thing. It makes be wonder why I even waste my time with such a pathetic person.

I remember now why I gave up on you before in the past, you were waffling crap about masturbation not being a addiction' similar to a drug addiction. Yet you yourself need your weekly fix (like a druggie). Gave up for a mth and then got back into it (like a druggie getting out of rehab) and keeps waffling crap about going to give up one day, again like a druggie that says he going to give up but cant.

I told ya before before get off those crap web pages go outside, smell the roses, go for walk, join the gym. For some odd reason you try to turn things into a battle (do you have ego problems ) and make ridiculous claims and waffle crap. Actually I'm losing interest in this forum because its boring, no one comes, and most people , like yourself, waffle.  I was only going here because its better than pulling ones ****** so I waste the dead time. I guess I upset  you because  I made your boyfriend leave, but don't worry he is back, if you are lucky he will lend you his 'fanta flesh vagina' for your weekly fix. If I'm  lucky you will also ignore me in the future if I can be bothered coming back.

casper00

Nov 03, 2010

To: opps mistake

sorry i was suppouse to say former addict not lone wolf where I said 'Wow Lone wolf did the penny ..... excuse me

Myron_Long

Nov 03, 2010

To: casper00

WOW... Casper you are outta control, LOL... You just made my day!

It's not that serious man. We are all handling our masturbation issue correctly in our own way and I believe we are all seeing positive results. You love to bring up that fanta flesh vagina though, LOL. I used that thing like twice and that was only because I did not want to ejaculate from using my hand. That was also before I started getting real sex from my ex and the few new female friends I've met.

"For some odd reason Former turns this forum into a battle" BUT you're doing the same thing. It's like you have to have the last word. AND I am nobody boyfriend. Once again, ANOTHER INTERNET INSULT from you. You wouldn't dare call me his boyfriend to my face.

I just want us all to get along and keep spreading the word to males who have erectile dysfunction due to porn/masturbation that there is hope AND that I am living proof that you can reverse erectile dysfunction to a degree.

casper00

Nov 03, 2010

To: Myron

I just dont belive a word you say. And i dont know why you saying god supports what you doing. I;m a christain and wouldnt say god ansewing my prayers if i ws addicted to porn. However i suppsoe it was wrong of me to say that, it was a dig at former addcit not you, However I can see how it was also downgrading to you. Maybe you have more insight than i thought knoticing that former addict turns eveything into a battle (EGO TRIPPER), I feel guilty now

Myron_Long

Nov 03, 2010

To: casper00

I know what I said about GOD. I stated, even though I know it's a sin to have sex before marriage, I still prayed to GOD to help me with my problem. I know that doesn't make sense but the only I person I pray to is GOD for anything, whether its sinful or not. I mainly prayed to GOD to help me stop masturbating and to give me a normal life. I still no watching porn or masturbating is consider a sin but hey I'm not perfect and GOD already knows that. Me and him will discuss my flaws on Judgement Day.

I just don't understand why you don't believe me. I have no reason to lie on here to a bunch of people I never met in person. These internet forums are designed for people to anomynously talk and seek answers for there problems to a bunch of people that will never you. We can easily open up to strangers vs. talking to family/friends/co-workers about a porn/masturbation problem. I have no reason to lie.

zap85

Nov 03, 2010

I thought i could break the habit. So far i have failed miserably several times.

But, on an average, i have reduced the habit (ejaculating) to a great extent. 14 times in 95 days (including Nocturnal emissions!). I feel much better and relaxed these days, though i`m personally stressed by lots of other personal problems.

I`m on an expedition to complete recovery from all health issues. Hope all people here get better over time!.

Good luck to all!.

casper00

Nov 03, 2010

Will as I said that comment was a low blow and very silly I admit it wrong and didn't feel right when I posted it. However as you say we are human and I hope you except my apology I felt you were just miss using gods name and it upset me. I couldn't have given porn up with out gods help as I say I went cold turkey. I have come full circle now I find porn very vulgar and unlike former addict I see no difference in masturbation and porn. I had my reasons for not believing you but I'm not going to go on about it. I feel perhaps I prejudged you because I found some of your posts vulgar but that was perhaps personal to me. At uni one paper 'crital thinking' we had to strip text and find flaws in arguments I guess I still do it. However I will not be so fussy. GBU

Myron_Long

Nov 03, 2010

To: casper00

oh okay... no problem!

Well this will be an interesting forum in the future because:

1) you and former state no longer going to watch porn; I still watch porn.
2) you and I state no longer masturbation
3) former states masturbation once a week

I'm curious to see how long you and former is going to stay away from watching porn because just like you believe I'm fibbing about stuff, I believe eventually porn is going to call yall back. I believe you can't stay away forever buddy. It's going to always be on the internet waiting for you to view. And this will bring back the temptation to masturbate, LOL.

I feel yall is doomed. Might as well be like me, accept the fact you love watching porn, watch it but don't masturbate to it. That way you get the best of both worlds, your porn and a more healthy penis.

You're probably thinking eventually I'm going to masturbate to porn because I'm still watching it. NAH! Ain't happening, I love the way my penis has been treating me for the past 5 weeks. Sex life is great!!!!

However, I do hope you and former can stay away from porn for a very long time but we all know it's never going anywhere, too accessible to stop a porn watching habit for good.

Myron_Long

Nov 03, 2010

To: EVERYONE

Do come back to this forum on a monthly basis and provide an update and I'll do the same. And please no lying on your hand touching your penis...

GOOD LUCK TO ALL!

Former_Addict

Nov 03, 2010

To: casper00

Well, it's not primary school english to detect sarcasm online.  If you said it to me in person, I'd obviously be able to pick it up easily.  Don't bother saying something if it's not meant to be serious.  Also, it is possible to contradict yourself in an argument without the intention to lie casper00, maybe not for you, but it does happen.

Well, it could also be debated that thinking about being high on coke forms more neurotransmitters than actually snorting it, but that's just a pointless argument.
Obviously masturbation and sex in a woman isn't the same thing, but what masturbation is, is basically an incomplete version of having sex with a woman.  Because when you masturbate you are ejaculating and have noone to bond with hence why it has negative effects.  When you ejaculate into a woman, you are taxing the body the same way, but you bond with the woman chemically hence why the effects are positive.  Yes, I'm pathetic because you misunderstood my point completely lol.

You do realize that television and internet can be addictions.  Would you put this in the same boat as a drug addiction?  If someone watches television and goes online everyday are they an addict in the same way someone is snorting coke in the alley.  Not every addiction is the same so don't put it all in the same boat.

In fact, what I'm trying to do is even harder than what you are trying to do.  It is said that complete abstinence is easier than perfect moderation.  Yes, it is possible to do things in moderation and not be affected, masturbation is one of them just like alcohol is.  Unfortunately you lack the discipline to do things in moderation, so you have to resort to complete abstinence.  Yes some addictions could be kept to complete abstinence, such as heroin or coke, but most addictions can be controlled with moderation.

Yes, I did try to turn this into a battle, I'm not gonna lie, but you haven't actually tried to keep things peaceful yourself, but I can tell it's in your nature to argue, so I can't really blame you.  Hopefully we can keep the conversation more civilized from now on without insults from both of us.

Former_Addict

Nov 03, 2010

My last relapse on porn was 5 and a half months ago. I go online basically everyday and I sometimes get the urge to watch porn about once a month, but that is usually solved by my once a week masturbation habit without porn. So Myron_Long, yes it is possible for me and casper00 to never watch porn, just like it is possible for you two to never masturbate.

flexiplan

Nov 04, 2010

To: Former Addict

"Yes some addictions could be kept to complete abstinence, such as heroin or coke, but most addictions can be controlled with moderation. "

Controlled or not addictions are still addictions.  If you want to stop masturbation but let yoursef pull it once a week you're still addicted.  Whereas with Casper and Myron we can say they're no longer addicted.  They chose not to partake in the activity anymore and 'won' because they do not partake in the activity anymore.  But if they 'lapse' then they will be addicted again or more acurately they will find that they're still addicted.

Addictions are awful things because even if you moderate your addiction your're still addicted.

The real question is do you label masturbation as an addiction?  For instance, If you masturbate and have no real qualms about doing so, and that you're sure you could stop masturbation for good if you really wanted to then you're not really addicted to it.  But if you hate masturbation and want to stop it for good but find it too hard to do so completely you are addicted and have less self-will and discipline than Casper does in being able to abstain.

It all comes down to what YOU want.  Letting yourself give in once a week just because it is supposedly more challenging than stopping completely is just plain stupid.  It's like a criminal who only commits a crime once a year is superior to the reformed citizen who hasn't commited a crime for 20 years.  Surely you wouldn't be more proud of the former?

casper00

Nov 04, 2010

Thankyou flexiplan very will put as you may have noticed former addict likes to waffle crap without  backing his ludicrous claims up with evidence yet expects every one else to.

Former addict I'm not going to be fussy about typos or spelling mistake or basic grammar errors because I do enough of them myself but really you need to learn how to construct a valid argument. What I mean is learn to reword your sentences (statements) so you are stating weather it is your personal opinion or weather you are claiming something as fact (most here is speculation). Its all about the start of the sentence. For example instead of saying, like you did, (Quote) 'even when your having sex you are still masturbating'  Instead say something like ' I feel that sex and masturbation have similar attributes because.... What you need to learn to do is not state opinions as fact.

Properly not a good example a better example is that pathetic claim you made when you said (Quote) 'In fact, what I'm trying to do is even harder than what you are trying to do.  It is said that complete abstinence is easier than perfect moderation'.   Really what you should have said is some thing like, I propose that complete abstinence..., or I argue that complete abstinence... or it could be debated that complete abstinence ...do you get my point (I bet not). That way you are claiming ownership of a opinion not stating it as fact which it clearly isn't. (BTW just because you could cite crap essays doesn't mean anything ). I am willing to help you more with this  basic english problem sometime on my day off if you like but I would rather you used a online course theirs lots and some are free. I am not going to debate the statement its not worth it as flexipan said its just plain stupid.

Who says all addictions are the same, your compassion with TV is pathetic I have compared masturbation addiction to drug addiction because both simulate the pleasure seeking areas of the brain releasing dopamine  etc. I am not stating they are the same I am saying they have similar attributes. Why do you argue over nothing. You say its in my nature to argue yet I already gave up on you in the past, couldn't be bothered.

I have a brother like you he argues over nothing thinking he clever and when people stop talking to him he thinks its because he is to smart for them. He is to thick to realise people just cant be bothered .I reckon you are like that.

casper00

Nov 04, 2010

To: zap85

Just keep trying you will get thier. Dont beat yourself up if you fail. Took me many attempts and I dont know if I'm out of the woods yet

Former_Addict

Nov 04, 2010

To: flexiplan

Actually, if I wanted to stop masturbation completely right now, I could probably do it, I'd probably have to go for 30 days like I have done before, then 60 days, then 90 days and so on, but I'm pretty confident that I could quit masturbation for good.  The only reason I haven't stopped for good is that I am not convinced that masturbation is something you need to quit for good.  Flexiplan, if you or casper00 can give me some really insightful articles or some indisputable scientific evidence that even masturbation once a week is bad for my health, I will definitely quit for good.

I was able to quit porn for good and that was only after I was convinced that even if I cut it down to once a week, it will still be bad for my mental health.  I'd relapse after a month or so and every time I did, I felt terrible.  During that time of course I was still addicted to porn because I gave into a craving.  Now my last relapse was 5 and a half months ago hence why I call myself a former addict of porn.

With masturbation, I choose to do it once a week not because I can't help it, but because I choose to keep it to once a week since the only evidence I can find is people in this forum saying yeah masturbation is bad, never do it again without any shred of evidence.  Seriously, where is the evidence that it is bad to do it even occasionally?  Until I get that evidence, I will remain unconvinced.  All I can find online are articles that state you can do it every single day or articles that recommend you cut it down to two to three times a week.  I only found one article that recommended you never do it ever and it was dated from the early 1900s!  Flexiplan and casper00, please show me the evidence!  At the very least give a rational detailed explanation of how masturbation is going to affect my mental and physical health even if done occasionally.  Saying to quit an addiction just because it is an addiction is a very weak argument.

Former_Addict

Nov 04, 2010

To: casper00

Wow the first two paragraphs were just basically insults, so I feel no need to respond to them. I don't really have a television addiction, if anything I might have an internet addiction, and yes it is something that needs to be put into control. I hope you don't recommend I cut off internet completely? I could also always cut it off for good, but unfortunately I need it for school or I'll fail, so what do you recommend?

I am pretty stubborn casper00, I will not lie, but that is only for people who want me to change my mind with a weak argument. So far your argument is: quit masturbation for good because its bad and an addiction, that is a very weak argument. If you can give me a better argument with a very strong backing, I will definitely become more open to your opinion.

Myron_Long

Nov 04, 2010

Across this world and all over the internet, even doctors repeat it, that masturbation is consider normal and has no negative side effects.

What all of these sites and doctors fail to mention is that masturbation is considered normal BUT if you are having problems getting an erection, maintaining an erection or experiencing lack of penis sensitivity during real sex, THEN MASTURBATION could be the cause of that effect.

I'll be the first to tell you that what I just said is true because I had all those issues above and once I refrained from masturbation for an entire month my penis became more responsive to a woman. That statement has to be true because my whole life I masturbated and never could enjoy sex with a latex condom. I would always say "I don't feel anything" and then my penis starts to go down. I took masturbation out the equation for a whole month and I felt the vagina sensation PLUS ejaculated thru a latex condom already THREE TIMES during real sex.

With that being said, if you want to continue masturbating once a week (because it is considered normal and healthy) then continue to masturbate once a week. But if you are currently experiencing any of those issues above:

trouble achieving a full erection
not maintaining erection during sex
complaining of lack of sensation during real sex
complaining that you can't feel anything thru a condom
can't get off from oral sex or a handjob

Then you need to refrain from masturbation COMPLETELY.

Former_Addict

Nov 04, 2010

I agree with you that general consensus seems to be that masturbation is normal and has no negative side effects, which of course isn't true.

trouble achieving a full erection
not maintaining erection during sex
complaining of lack of sensation during real sex
complaining that you can't feel anything thru a condom
can't get off from oral sex or a handjob

I fortunately have never had any of these problems even when I when I masturbated everyday. The only time I had these problems was when I masturbated to porn everyday, but they went away when I quit porn.

The reason I want to quit masturbation is more for mental than physical reasons. In terms of having energy and feeling mentally sharp, but I tend to get these benefits from refraining to once a week, so you could see why I don't feel motivated to quit completely. If however, casper00 and flexiplan if they aren't the same person (lol), can give me rock solid evidence that even once a week of masturbation is bad for my mental health, then I will quit for good.

Myron_Long

Nov 04, 2010

Thats good to hear. Plus it may also depend on how often a male masturbates, how they're masturbating and how they feel after they masturbate (happy, depressed, guilty, defeated, etc.) Psychological issues may arise.

I think my issue was how I masturbated over the years. It took me years to really I was desensitizing my penis. It just didn't make sense to me that I can enjoy real sex but not sex with a latex condom (because condoms are made for us to still enjoy sex)

I just told myself it was best if I just didn't touch my penis AT ALL! I could not psychologically separate masturbation from real sex. Nobody can touch my penis better than me so I had to take ME out the equation.

Still watch porn though, that does not psychologically affect me.

casper00

Nov 04, 2010

Will actually I wasn't insulting you in the first two paragraphs I actually was being polite trying to help you . I meant it in good faith . I guess you cant take good advice. You are very arrogant.

I don't understand your point of this Tv waffle sounds like more nonsense waffle One can only expect it from you.

Also I have never produced a argument  with you that people should stop or go cold turkey from masturbation. I have merely said what I choose to do. I have pointed out that rather than listen to what others say and crap internet articles people should go more with their innate feelings. Quite frankly I don't care what you do.

Many people notice the benefits of stopping masturbation you yourself waffled on how much better you felt after you gave up for a mth (personally I don't believe you did).  However like a drug addiction you reverted back to your fix. I guess you just cant admit you have a problem (I reckon you wank daily myself).

I don't know why you expect people to try to prove stuff to you , like you a king or some thing yet you make pathetic claims. Posting and citing sources is pathetic you would counter with other sources and I could counter claim. It would be never ending and  a pathlic waste of time

Please consider my advice to do with learning how to make statements so they are not stated  as facts when they are really ones personal opinion . Also don't believe those crap internet articles I have told you four times you are clearly being bias and seeing what you want to see

casper00

Nov 04, 2010

Wow just noticed you calling me and flexipan the same person, You really do have paranoid problems, clearly a odd ball

Former_Addict

Nov 04, 2010

To: casper00

Myron Long is right, I should of paid attention to his warning.  Casper00 is here just to attack people, he said it himself many times already.  I'll demonstrate how everything he says are merely attacks on me by examining his last posts.

"Will actually I wasn't insulting you in the first two paragraphs I actually was being polite trying to help you . I meant it in good faith . I guess you cant take good advice. You are very arrogant."

Blah, Blah, Blah, claims to "help" me, but then insults me at the end by calling me arrogant, haha.  Seriously, this argument is about one thing, whether masturbation should be done in moderation or whether to quit it for good, quit derailing the argument.

"I don't understand your point of this Tv waffle sounds like more nonsense waffle One can only expect it from you."

Again, this has nothing to do with the argument of masturbation, you're just using this as a way to attack me rather than the argument itself.

"Also I have never produced a argument  with you that people should stop or go cold turkey from masturbation. I have merely said what I choose to do. I have pointed out that rather than listen to what others say and crap internet articles people should go more with their innate feelings. Quite frankly I don't care what you do."

So why are you arguing with me? This is a waste of time, you're just using this argument to insult me.  Go get a girlfriend and then argue with her then.

"Many people notice the benefits of stopping masturbation you yourself waffled on how much better you felt after you gave up for a mth (personally I don't believe you did).  However like a drug addiction you reverted back to your fix. I guess you just cant admit you have a problem (I reckon you wank daily myself)."

Again attacks me by claiming that I am an addict, but doesn't actually provide any evidence of why I should quit completely other than I have a problem, lol.

"I don't know why you expect people to try to prove stuff to you , like you a king or some thing yet you make pathetic claims. Posting and citing sources is pathetic you would counter with other sources and I could counter claim. It would be never ending and  a pathlic waste of time"

Yeah you're right I should merely accept everything you tell me as fact without any shred of evidence.  So you just admitted to me and everyone here that you are just arguing with me to put me down and it has nothing to do with the argument of masturbaton.

"Please consider my advice to do with learning how to make statements so they are not stated as facts when they are really ones personal opinion . Also don't believe those crap internet articles I have told you four times you are clearly being bias and seeing what you want to see"

Your advice is pretty useless and hard to comprehend, why not learn proper grammar before even bothering to give me advice on how to argue.  My advice for you is to quit wasting your time attacking people, it's pretty boring and obvious.

"Wow just noticed you calling me and flexipan the same person, You really do have paranoid problems, clearly a odd ball"

Again, all you do is attack me with every sentence LOL, why are you even here, you're just a troll, go somewhere else if you're not going to contribute to the conversation in a meaningful way.  I'm done talking with you, go find someone else to bully.  I'll end up quitting masturbation for good in the near future anyways, no thanks to you of course.

flexiplan

Nov 05, 2010

"At the very least give a rational detailed explanation of how masturbation is going to affect my mental and physical health even if done occasionally.  Saying to quit an addiction just because it is an addiction is a very weak argument. "

An addiction by definition is something you should/want to stop but can't or at the very least find it difficult to do so.  You've mentioned before that you would like to stop for good but figure it would be too hard whilst you don't have a girlfriend, so that would indicate you are still somewhat addicted.

However, you have just recently stated that if you wanted to stop masturbation completely right now you could probably do so, but you don't because you see no reason why you should wipe it out of your life completely now.  This indicates that you are not addicted to it then.  You keep participation in the activity (hence not addiction) down to moderate levels and are happy with that.

With this I'm not trying to convince you to give up your habit.  What I was trying to do in my last post is merely help you down off your high horse.

As I've said before, it all comes down to what you want.  If you're happy with your current habits then fine, I for one am not trying to for force abstinence down your throat.

casper00

Nov 05, 2010

To: Fr

Wow former addict that must have taken you ages to do all that waffle about nothing. You sure have tons of spare time. Actually I don't think I was insulting, I was  just trying to help you. But you are to arrogant to see that. You yourself  are even admitting  that you are are very arrogant when you said that you like to pick battles,  That  is a  very arrogant statement. Instead of doing all that waffle about nothing you could have made one of your feeble attempts to explain one of your many pathetic claims.

It wasn't your grammar I was trying to help you with it was.... oh never mind be a waste of time  trying to explain

Yes flexipan, he is on a high hoarse  the problem is when he's knocked off it he is to thick to see he has been knocked off. Oh that's right we are not allowed to insult the king but he can insult others.

casper00

Nov 05, 2010

Myron long in regards to your post on Nov the 3 about staying away from porn. I now have no interest in images of porn pictures/mags/internet etc However, I am fighting a burning desire to go to one of the many strip clubs that are only 15 min drive from where I live. I admit I have a burning desire to admire naked women in the flesh after all I am human . However, I know if I do I wont dash home and pull my ******. I guess I will need a long walk after it. Its been a few mths now since I abstained from masturbation I admit it gets tempting, sometimes I get so horny I think I'm going to explode.. However I still think the pro's out way the con's

I don't really know if strip clubs could really be classed as porn probably soft porn.

Myron_Long

Nov 05, 2010

To: casper00

I go to strip club once every 2 weeks (whe I get paid) LOL...

If I have no real date for that night , I go there just to be around some sexy woman that wants to rub their body against mines and make me hard a little while. I'll also enjoy a drink and talking dirty to the girls. We all have fun. I don't know about you but I love it when a woman is rubbing up against my hard penis while she let me feel on her boobs and azz.

A couple months ago, I would've went home to pull up some porn (still wanting to see naked women) and masturbate to it. But the last couple times I went to strip club, I felt no urge to go home and masturbate. For some reason, I rather wait for real sex and exhaust my sexual frustrations that way. So there definitely has to be some self-control after going to a strip club and I wouldn't say its the same as porn. We don't see sex at the strip club. But I know what you mean, once you're home from the strip club, you're laying down in the bed with a throbbing penis that wants to ejaculate but self-control is the key. DON'T TOUCH IT AT ALL!

I thought I read in an earlier post of yours that you're currently sexually active with a gf, woman, women, etc. If that is true, why do you still get these urges to touch yourself? I could see if you had nobody in the picture but you do (well I think you do)

If you're not married, going to the strip club ONCE in a while is not bad. You must be like me, just love to see some sexy naked women. That's not an addiction to me. With that being said, watching porn with no masturbation is not an addiction either.

Former_Addict

Nov 05, 2010

To: flexiplan

"An addiction by definition is something you should/want to stop but can't or at the very least find it difficult to do so.  You've mentioned before that you would like to stop for good but figure it would be too hard whilst you don't have a girlfriend, so that would indicate you are still somewhat addicted."

Yeah, but I changed my mind from that and I now think it is possible to quit completely.

"However, you have just recently stated that if you wanted to stop masturbation completely right now you could probably do so, but you don't because you see no reason why you should wipe it out of your life completely now.  This indicates that you are not addicted to it then.  You keep participation in the activity (hence not addiction) down to moderate levels and are happy with that."

Exactly.

"With this I'm not trying to convince you to give up your habit.  What I was trying to do in my last post is merely help you down off your high horse."

Alright, I see your point.

"As I've said before, it all comes down to what you want.  If you're happy with your current habits then fine, I for one am not trying to for force abstinence down your throat."

Like I said before I plan to quit completely in the near future.  I'm just testing out once a week to see how it works for me for several months.  Obviously the benefits aren't as good as quitting completely, but by doing it once a week, I notice I have higher testosterone levels and lower stress levels, which might not be possible with abstinence.  I'm just experimenting basically, it's not meant to be permanent especially if I'm convinced that abstinence is better in the long run.

Myron_Long

Nov 05, 2010

While you're doing this once a week mastubating thing, are you still getting real sex? What I'm trying to say is.... Your method may be fine for now but if it's done for a long period of time WITHOUT some real sex in between, you may come across some bedroom issues when time has come to have real sex! Your penis might be too use to your hand. If you REALLY DON'T LIKE to masturbate, why don't you just completely stop and get a female friend? Your once of week method sounds cool but how do you know if you're still addicted to masturbation or not? I think you need to go a whole month without masturbating then back to your once a week JUST to see if you have self-control over the habit. Can you go a whole month and no masturbation??? Right now you're only proving you can last a week.

Former_Addict

Nov 05, 2010

Actually, before I started doing it once a week, I went first 15 days without masturbating and then after that I did 30 days without masturbating. The 15 days experiment was great and tested my limits, but the 30 days abstinence was incredibly stressful and taxing. I decided to do once a week even before my 15 and 30 day trial because I wanted to experiment with it and see how it would work out. So far, it's definitely a big improvement over everyday, but obviously the benefits are not as good as when I went without 15 or 30 days, but there is less negative effects as well, so it kind of balances out. I don't think I'd be successful with the once a week experiment right now if I didn't do the 15 and 30 day trial first because doing that gave me the discipline that was needed to abstain for at least one week with ease.

I am not getting any real sex while I am doing this, if I had a girlfriend now I wouldn't even be doing the once a week masturbation experiment, and would simply quit because there would be no need to continue it. So far the once a week experiment is helping me attract the opposite sex because I get extra energy and testosterone that seems to draw women towards me and it increases my social skills and confidence to keep them attracted to me. Meditation has assisted me in keeping stress down in the days that I do not masturbate. When I went 30 days without masturbation, it didn't seem to help me as much in getting women mainly because I was too stressed and nervous to take advantage of the benefits. Perhaps, if I learn to manage the stress through increased meditation and consistent exercise I can gain greater benefits and finally quit masturbation for good.

Lonewolfof90

Nov 05, 2010

When you watch porn do you watch the soft core average stuff or do you watch that rough mundane stuff with girls getting bukkaked and *** to mouth? The tricky thing about porn is that you start off watching the normal stuff like a girl having sex with a guy. Then when you start to get tired of this and feel the urge to move on to more insane things like girls getting slapped and drinking ****. It gets worse but I don't want to get into that. However, if you don't masturbate than you probably just watch the normal porn and feel no urge to dig deeper. I am just wondering because this was my problem with porn and why I felt the need to quit. The normal stuff was not enough anymore and I had to find wilder things to get me to ejaculate. Actually, I began to realize that I couldn't even attain a full erection while watching normal porn like I used to.
This is a concern that caused me to realize that masturbation and porn were a negative for me. And believe me I have seen things that human eyes should never see! stuff that I regret watching. So I ask when you used to masturbate did you ever get into the rough stuff or was the normal porn enough?

Lonewolfof90

Nov 05, 2010

I am not attacking your method in anyway because like flexipan said"If you're happy with your current habits then fine"! However, masturbation has the opposite effect on me. For me it is more of the psychological effect than a physical effect. As I probably stated, I am a virgin and I masturbated mainly because I had no girlfriend. So doing this helped me to relieve my self of sexual tension. However, afterwards I felt like a loser and had low self esteem because I felt that if I couldn't get a girl than I was a total failure. For you it is different. It boost your confidence and does not give you that feeling of dirtiness or regret. When I stopped masturbating I could approach girls more and not feel like a loser who masturbated because he couldn't get a girlfriend. My confidence was higher and I could walk with my head high in proud! I can now talk to girls without negative thoughts going through my mind which I feel is a major step forward. These are my reasons, but if masturbation helps you right now than that is good too. Every person's body is different!

Former_Addict

Nov 05, 2010

I'm pretty much like you Lonewolfof90, masturbation does not help me at all, in fact when I was doing it daily for months after I decided to quit porn over a year, I became depressed and had low self esteem.  Things only started to turn around for me when I started exercising and meditating because it reversed a lot of the negative effects of masturbation even when I was masturbating daily.

Basically, my once a week method is not an end all solution, it is a compromise for guys that don't want to quit because of the heightened stress, but in the same time they want that increased confidence and better social skills.  Basically, the day after masturbating I feel like a chump, low confidence and weak social skills.  Slowly as each day goes by I feel my confidence increasing and social skills improving, by the 6th day I feel like a champ and can conquer the world.  Then when I masturbate after 7 days, I go straight from hero to zero instantly and then the cycle repeats itself.  I masturbate on Sunday that way, I can be fully energized for the weekend when I go out.

Obviously it is better to quit completely, but I just want to test out this compromise for a few months to see if it helps me get women. Mainly because testosterone peaks after 1 week without masturbating and then slowly declines as your body gets accustomed to not masturbating even though the mental energy doesn't go away.   I find meditating once a day is enough to keep me calm on the days that I don't masturbate.  Then the mental stress begins to increase I find after about a month, which kind of cancels out any benefits from abstinence.

Basically Lonewolfof90 if you want to quit masturbation completely, it's not going to be easy, but it is definitely possible.  You will need to change your diet to not have foods that do not make you horny and you'll have to develop good habits that lower stress.  Meditation and exercise (cardio or weight training) are excellent substitutes.  If you are unable to do this, then it is pointless to quit masturbation because you'll just stress yourself out.  The key is to convert that increased mental energy to positive energy and not let it become trapped energy that translates to stress.

As for quitting porn watching while masturbating, that is your main priority and that's good that you are taking steps to stop it.  It is incredibly dangerous in the long term and this is not something you can do once in a while and still be okay.  Of course porn isn't nearly as bad if you watch it without masturbating like Myron_Long does, but for people like me and you who were addicted in the past, this would only make us have a relapse.  You'll have to quit completely for the rest of your life, my last relapse was 5 and a half months ago and I haven't looked back since.

Good luck

Myron_Long

Nov 05, 2010

I don't know what kind porn it is but I watch stuff like role play sex, amateur sex, or homemade sex. I don't like nasty sex like gangbangs or bizarre sex, none of that crap.

Now, when I do look at porn, I don't get a full erection from just watching it. I rarely do, in fact, I can't remember getting one. I always got a full erection from hand stimulation. This is how I know I'm not that affatuated with porn but I still like to watch it. For some reason, my penis only gets hard when I'm sitting next to a woman on my couch or while I'm getting a lapdance at the strip club, touchy feely stuff... But I can tell my visual stimulation is coming back slowly because a week ago some girl text me a naked pic of her and I instantly got hard. The old me would've got hard AFTER I start touching myself.

So by me not masturbating, I definitely see improvements in my achieving erections.

Myron_Long

Nov 05, 2010

Do you live alone in a house? I live alone in a house so there would be plenty nights I be bored and start looking at porn just to masturbate (have something to do).

I still live alone but the masturbation urges are gone completely (since I survived 4-5 weeks now) I proved to myself that these naked women on video doing all sorts of stuff is just entertainment. My penis now understands that porn is not the real thing. I think if everyone changes the way they view porn masturbation wouldn't come to mind.

casper00

Nov 05, 2010

No Myron I don 't have a girl friend as I have said she had to go back to Japan. We had flirted for a about 4mths (she worked in a sushi take away I visited) Anyhow masturbation (even weekly) had made me to shy to ask her out it wasn't until I had given up for a mth that I had the courage to ask her out. She wondered why it took so long. Sadly by that time she only had a couple of weeks left on her visa. Anyhow it was the first time I have had sex with some one I loved and it was mind blowing. I have been with many women in the past just for sex /lust ,or companionship however nothing can be compared to sex with love. People could say 'love conquers all”and perhaps I should have just married her but its more complicated than that, and I don't have the desire to explain

I now have no desire for one night stands I would rather be in love or stay single and am very careful. I am actually enjoying being single because I am no where near as shy as I used to be when I masturbated. I have many knew girls in my life that I innocently flirt with, I even have one I could get my rocks off if I wanted to but I do not love her so don't want to hurt her (use her).

Admittedly I have a thing for Asian imports not that I lust after them I just find them so cute. Lucky for me theirs lots here in Australia.

Myron_Long

Nov 05, 2010

To: casper00

So what are you going to do about ejaculation? What's your plan man??? You say you don't want no random sex and rather be in love. Personally, I can't go months without ejaculating, that would drive me crazy.

With that being said, when was the last time you ejaculated?

casper00

Nov 05, 2010

I dont know when the last time was, would have been close to two mths I think, I'm not tracking anything. Yes its a worry about ejuculation and i feel like i going to explode some times.It would be so easy to toss the bacon however i try to just enjoy the feeling its nice in a way feeling loaded, fustrating but in away it has its benefits. Any how if i do full short and toss the bacon I will just start over again. One thing for certain I'm not going to beat myself up. I see lots of benifents espillay in my complextion. I now blush around women i find attractive at first i found it embarrassing, but women find it cute.

Myron_Long

Nov 05, 2010

To: casper00

"Any how if i do full short and toss the bacon I will just start over again"

smh... It sounds like you already have it in your mind that you're going to masturbate again dude. So, can we say the addiction is still there? It's been 2 months, you on the roll now... Don't go back to where you didn't want to be. Don't give in...

You're not touching yourself a little are you? Because thats how it starts...

BrettFleming

Nov 05, 2010

To: Everyone except Lone Wolf

Did you guys know you are all extremely immature, Casper and Myron especially.
I mean, I get online to look up something serious, and here you ***** are, posting stupid ******** about something inconsequential to the matter at hand.
Grow the **** up.

Former_Addict

Nov 06, 2010

I don't live alone in a house, but at night there's nothing stopping me from looking at porn just to masturbate. However, I don't feel the need to even watch it, I'll do anything else like play acoustic guitar, listen to the radio, read articles online or talk in a chat room to keep my mind occupied. That's good that your mind is not susceptible to addiction from porn. Unfortunately I can't do that as I used to masturbate to porn everyday for 2 years, so watching a video will just encourage a relapse. Of course before I was addicted I could probably do what you what you are doing now, but now it is out of the question.

flexiplan

Nov 06, 2010

"Basically, the day after masturbating I feel like a chump, low confidence and weak social skills.  Slowly as each day goes by I feel my confidence increasing and social skills improving, by the 6th day I feel like a champ and can conquer the world.  Then when I masturbate after 7 days, I go straight from hero to zero instantly and then the cycle repeats itself.  I masturbate on Sunday that way, I can be fully energized for the weekend when I go out."

Former_Addict, can I suggest that perhaps you are addicted to this 'cycle'?Can I also suggest that this cycle is perhaps mind made?

I know I used to pretty much feel the same way you do.  I felt like complete shite are wanking but after each clean day I would feel better and better about myself until, of course, I would give in again.

Nowadays though I'm not trapped in that cycle anymore.  After wanking I don't feel that awful sense of guilt I used to feel, and clean day after clean day I don't feel any different/better.

I think it's that cycle that makes masturbation addictive.  The cycle keeps the 'game' going with the high emotions and the low emotions.

What I would suggest, Former_Addict, is that perhaps you should start investigating to see if you can find a way to get out of the cycle.  Yes, I suppose there may be no reason to resist wanking if you don't feel that bad about it but from my experience the habit can be conquered out of the habit being boring.

These days I find masturbation boring which is why I went for three months without it recently.  Lately I find porn boring too and so now have decided not to watch it anymore even though I've got about 30 DVDs worth of the stuff.

The only 'sexual' related thing I'm still struggling with is using the services of prostitutes.  Lately I've been trying to wear the habit out by partaking every Saturday.  I make a promise to myself that I will only indulge for two to three more Saturdays and then I'm going to quit prostitutes for good.

I've had enough of the 'games' where I feel like I'm finally getting on top of my addiction and then just 'slip up' without so much as a second thought.

Former_Addict

Nov 06, 2010

To: flexiplan

"Former_Addict, can I suggest that perhaps you are addicted to this 'cycle'?Can I also suggest that this cycle is perhaps mind made?"

I wouldn't say I am addicted to this cycle because I choose to do it, it's not like I give in by the weekend, this was my plan for a while.  I agree it is a mind made cycle, it's just an experiment that I am going to be doing for several months and then I'll make a real push to quit.  The good thing is at least I feel much better than when I masturbated every single day and will not go back to that.  You could say in a way that I'm procrastinating quitting for good, but I do that with everything, haha. :D

"I know I used to pretty much feel the same way you do.  I felt like complete shite are wanking but after each clean day I would feel better and better about myself until, of course, I would give in again."

I know what you mean, but it's a conscious choice to give in, it's not like I give in because I can't help it, it's more like I have a schedule for myself and follow it, hence why I purposely give in at the same day of the week.  It does keep the addiction under control, but obviously it does not completely remove the addiction, it just partially removes it.

"Nowadays though I'm not trapped in that cycle anymore.  After wanking I don't feel that awful sense of guilt I used to feel, and clean day after clean day I don't feel any different/better."

That's a good sign, but I don't feel any guilt because I do it by choice, now if I started going back to several times a week or everyday I'd feel incredibly guilty.

"I think it's that cycle that makes masturbation addictive.  The cycle keeps the 'game' going with the high emotions and the low emotions."

You make a good point, however originally I was not addicted to masturbation for this reason because I did it every single day so I always had low emotions.  Now you could say I lessened my addiction and changed it to a cycle of up and down emotions.

"What I would suggest, Former_Addict, is that perhaps you should start investigating to see if you can find a way to get out of the cycle.  Yes, I suppose there may be no reason to resist wanking if you don't feel that bad about it but from my experience the habit can be conquered out of the habit being boring."

The reason I don't quit masturbating is not because I like the cycle.  This is just a step in my recovery is the best way to look at it.  I went from doing it everyday for about 10 years, and to quit cold turkey right after is not realistic for me.  So I'm basically doing a transition period where I do it once a week, and then once I feel ready in the coming months, I will quit cold turkey and it won't be as difficult when I make the big jump.

"These days I find masturbation boring which is why I went for three months without it recently.  Lately I find porn boring too and so now have decided not to watch it anymore even though I've got about 30 DVDs worth of the stuff."

That's a good sign that you are bored of it, that's how I feel about porn, but that's probably because I haven't done it in about 5 and a half months.  It's online and I have nothing stopping me, but the pain I went through for 2 years.

"The only 'sexual' related thing I'm still struggling with is using the services of prostitutes.  Lately I've been trying to wear the habit out by partaking every Saturday.  I make a promise to myself that I will only indulge for two to three more Saturdays and then I'm going to quit prostitutes for good."

Hmm, yeah if you are doing it every Saturday, you could argue this is an addiction, however just as serious as my masturbation addiction.  Instead of masturbating once a week, you are paying for sex once a week, which in the end is basically the same thing, since you are addicted to the cycle.  Now if you were getting laid with a girlfriend once a week, that would be a different story.

I don't necessarily think you need to quit prostitutes for good, a more reasonable goal will be to visit a prostitute once a month to relieve sexual tension, and never masturbate at all.  You'll also save a lot of money since you'll be visiting a prostitute 12 times a year as opposed to 52 times a year.  Personally, If I had the money I would do this.  We are sexual beings, it's okay to relieve sexual tension, so don't feel guilty!  The key is to have control over your sexual urges and not let it control you!

Lonewolfof90

Nov 06, 2010

To: flexiplan

I hope those prostitutes are clean because I know some people that have gotten std s from them and I personally would not want to take the risk of sleeping with a woman who does it with 10 different guys a day for a living. But the prostitutes I am referring to are the common street ******. If they are high class prostitutes than they should be clean I think However, the ones I have seen are ugly!.

Myron_Long

Nov 06, 2010

To: BrettFleming

Sorry we pissed you off but things were outta control at one point but now resolved. Do come back and engage in the conversation.

Myron_Long

Nov 06, 2010

To: flexiplan

"These days I find masturbation boring which is why I went for three months without it recently.  Lately I find porn boring too and so now have decided not to watch it anymore even though I've got about 30 DVDs worth of the stuff. "

>>>Flexiplan, I'm sorry but your addiction is still there if you have not thrown away the 30 DVDS worth of stuff. What are you waiting for??? You are keeping the temptation there buddy. I remember3 years ago I had 5 DVDS in my house that I really didn't want to let go but I found enough strength to put them in the trash on trash day. And that was only 5. You got 30. When trash day comes, you throw those bad boys in the trash and they you can say you finally have total control of your mastubation addiction.

"The only 'sexual' related thing I'm still struggling with is using the services of prostitutes.  Lately I've been trying to wear the habit out by partaking every Saturday.  I make a promise to myself that I will only indulge for two to three more Saturdays and then I'm going to quit prostitutes for good. "

>>>Dude this is worst than watching porn. You're paying money for sex. Draining your bank account for women. Making them rich for a quick ejaculation. This got to stop. If you hung around me I wouldn't let you do that non-sense.  Do you have friends you can hang around that's not into stuff like that? Till this day, I never paid for sex. One time I almost did but I man up and said to that girl "I don't pay for sex, you got the wrong dude!"--- she laughed and was like "okay"... Of course we never had sex but hey these women come and go dude...

Why you can't you just meet a girl somewhere in your neighborhood? Or go on one of those online dating sites? Those work... I met some before and it turned into real good sex.

flexiplan

Nov 06, 2010

"I don't necessarily think you need to quit prostitutes for good, a more reasonable goal will be to visit a prostitute once a month to relieve sexual tension, and never masturbate at all.  You'll also save a lot of money since you'll be visiting a prostitute 12 times a year as opposed to 52 times a year.  Personally, If I had the money I would do this.  We are sexual beings, it's okay to relieve sexual tension, so don't feel guilty!  The key is to have control over your sexual urges and not let it control you!"

I used to be able to moderate my addiction and just spend a minimal amount of money on prostitutes once a fortnight but those days are now long gone.  The reason for this is that these days I don't feel the 'guilt' anymore.  You see the guilt is what helped me to keep away for those two weeks.  I don't think it was because I had relieved my sexual tension (well not entirely anyway).

From my experience I'm not a great believer in the notion of sexual tension that needs to be satiated.  In the moments before all of my 'indulgences' lately I didn't have an overiding sense of horniness.  Don't get me wrong, I've felt horny but I know that I can carry on happily throughout the day without paying for it.  And knowing this I still do it.

The reason(s) why I pay for sex are not very clear to me at all, which is probably why I have had so much difficulty in overcoming it.  As I've said, there have been times where I've felt like I've finally overcome the habit for good.  Where I've felt extremely positive and good about myself knowing I've finally beat something that's been a burden for so long.  But then, just on my way home from work or something I just give in just like that.  Sometimes it's more pre-meditated but sometimes it's not. Sometimes I get close to going but manage to resist, but then the next day the same thing happens again but I give in.

In terms of moderating my addiction I could probably do it somewhat effectively but it won't be reliable.  When at the brothel it's very easy to feel indifferent to the amount of money I spend there.  Often after a 'punt' I don't feel satisfied and so go for another one immediately afterwards.  What I would budget myself to spend on prostitutes for a month I could easily spend in a day.  Even with this Saturday rule I've been following lately I've been partaking multiple times on the same day.

flexiplan

Nov 06, 2010

To: Myron Long

>>>Flexiplan, I'm sorry but your addiction is still there if you have not thrown away the 30 DVDS worth of stuff. What are you waiting for??? You are keeping the temptation there buddy. I remember3 years ago I had 5 DVDS in my house that I really didn't want to let go but I found enough strength to put them in the trash on trash day. And that was only 5. You got 30. When trash day comes, you throw those bad boys in the trash and they you can say you finally have total control of your mastubation addiction.

I see little point in trashing my porn collection. If I slip up and watch a DVD it won't be a big deal. The fact I've got so many already helps to convince myself that I don't need to buy anymore.

"Why you can't you just meet a girl somewhere in your neighborhood? Or go on one of those online dating sites? Those work... I met some before and it turned into real good sex. "

Heh, I don't know why I find it so difficult man.

Lonewolfof90

Nov 06, 2010

Ok Myron_Long I see now! No wonder you don't get sexually stimulated when watching porn. You watch the amateur normal stuff with normal sexually activity. It is that bizarre and unnatural stuff that causes people to have problems. That type of porn will mess with a person's head and should be avoided at all cost! But the amateur porn displaying normal sex acts between men and women is not going to do anything and as I stated before, I wasn't even sexually stimulated by this stuff. I could watch that type of porn and not even feel the urge to masturbate. But that professional porn with actual pornographic actresses like Gianna, Jasmin Byrne, and Monica Mattos, really messed with my head and I had serious psychological problems from this garbage! People need to realize that these acts are not realistic. The average woman would not swallow and I don't blame them because that is disgusting and degrading to women. I have read about guys who have dumped their girlfriends because they would not perform the way the women in porn videos were. Sad but true.

Lonewolfof90

Nov 06, 2010

At the same time I am restraining from watching any porn at all! The normal stuff typically leads me to want to watch the more intense porn.

Myron_Long

Nov 06, 2010

I didn't know Gianna was that known, LOL.... I used to watch her and yes she was very erotic but one thing about me... I don't get excited watching the same porn stars over and over again. I'm bored with them after one scene because I already know how they look naked and how they work it. Amateur porn is so much better. Real couples doing real sex gets me hyped up for real sex.

I noticed my last couple of days I haven't look at porn. Just didn't feel the urge to. So I guess thats also telling me I have self-control over watching porn when I want to and of course, no urge to masturbate to it.

Myron_Long

Nov 06, 2010

To: flexiplan

"I see little point in trashing my porn collection. If I slip up and watch a DVD it won't be a big deal. The fact I've got so many already helps to convince myself that I don't need to buy anymore. "

>>>Again, what is the point of holding onto the porn DVDS if you are quitting porn for good? If you wanna get rid of your past memories with porn and masturbation, you would get rid of those DVDS before they haunt you again. I just don't think you're strong enough to do it.

If that is the case, just admit you love to watch porn but in moderation rather than completely not watching it all.

casper00

Nov 06, 2010

To: BrettFleming

I reckon you are Former addict pissed off that me and Myron made peace. Maybe Im wrong ethier way who cares

zap85

Nov 06, 2010

To: casper00

I`m indeed trying to put a hard stop on the habit. I feel i have been drained out throughout my youth and even though i am only 25, i feel like a 45 year old, suffering from weaknesses, low immunity and a dozen other health issues!. Now, it`s been 4 days since i even had an erection. I`m totally getting out of any sexual thought. Even porn has failed to impress me these days and when i think of porn, i feel it`s too boring!. I`m not involving myself in something which is extremely creative and totally productive!. So, i finally find that simply by shifting our focus to something that`s most interesting to us can make us do better in life!.

The truth about my habit was that i wasn`t addicted to masturbation 2 years ago. I only used to do it once a month or so. But when bad times came, and i gambled money and lost lots of money and had some severe problems with my education, i had no other choice but to consider masturbation to fight depression owing to the fact that i don`t smoke or consume alcohol or do drugs. But, the sad thing was that i could have come out of all my personal problems if i had thought about alternatives then and there. Maybe i was too lazy and felt the orgasm was worth all the wealth and health finally to come to a conclusion that it really was!. But now i`m so unfortunate that i had lost my time and money and most of all, my health. :(

I could have done some physical exercises to combat depression. I didn`t. May this be a lesson to me and anyone who is intending to masturbate for orgasm or fighting depression.

good luck!.

casper00

Nov 06, 2010

To: flexiplan

Flexipan I once had a addiction to prostitutes many years back. I'm sure you don't have to be told that all they want is your money . They are not only professionals at sex they are professionals at manipulating men. Basically they just tell us men what we want to hear. However I have to admit there are some very nice kind ones I once had a very nice thing going with one.

Anyhow compared to one nights or causal sex I personally would still see them as a better option.
No offense Myron but I think causal sex is very dangerous , mainly because women are very sneaky creatures they say its only causal and next thing you know they moving in bombarding you with all this crap about just being used etc. Yes I know a person lays all the cards on the table before hand however women often shove one up the sleeve. There is also the risk of getting them pregnant . Yes I know you wear condoms and all that but things happen with causal sex in the heat of the moment. With prostitutes they are much better prepared and make sure this doesn't happen . I once spent three years with a so called casual partner.. Admittedly I should have been stronger and just walked out but some women are good guilt trippers. However we learn from our mistakes. Hopefully you will meet some one nice and not need either.

casper00

Nov 06, 2010

No, I do not have it on my mind that I'm going to masturbate, I can see how it looks like that, Yer I admit I'm not out of the woods yet and have my moments. Actually I had a few days off work, (back now thankfully) I hate idle time, they the most dangerous. Their would have to be a strong correlation between excessive masturbation and unemployment. I'm a lot happier since I gave up and don't want to go back their thanks for the support anyhow.

I would like to put my 2 cents worth in in regards to all this porn you watch. Do you think that maybe it desensitizes you to the female form. I know that when I watched porn (all those perfect bodies) that when I saw a normal naked women I would notice their flaws , saggy ****, stretch marks etc. Now little things like that are not important.

casper00

Nov 06, 2010

To: zap85

I don't believe masturbation fights depression I think it causes it. Physical excise is my medication its not to late start now. Hang in there you are still young at least you recognize your faults so thats a start.

Myron_Long

Nov 06, 2010

To: casper00

Before I was watching porn (my younger days), I was picky to form. Watching porn made it worst at one point. Now I'm in my 30's, I understand that women bodies have flaws so I don't compare the women in porn to regular women. PLUS when I watch porn I watch a variety of women. I.E. big booty women, big boobs women, older women, younger women, and even plus size women. So porn doesn't affect me that way. I just don't watch hardcore stuff meaning stuff that will never happen in real life.

I don't understand how you feel messing with a prostitute is better than casual sex but to each's own. I just never had the desire to pay a woman for sex, it's not in my character at all. And none of my females bombard me with crap I guess because I did have their mind thinking they could be the one. Besides casual sex usually last up to 3-4 encounters, after that the woman moves on or call once in a blue moon.

Former_Addict

Nov 06, 2010

To: flexiplan

"I used to be able to moderate my addiction and just spend a minimal amount of money on prostitutes once a fortnight but those days are now long gone.  The reason for this is that these days I don't feel the 'guilt' anymore.  You see the guilt is what helped me to keep away for those two weeks.  I don't think it was because I had relieved my sexual tension (well not entirely anyway)."

It seems that you are a basically a sex addict.  I would say it's very similar than a porn addiction, except that it's more real and intense.  Sex addiction isn't an easy addiction to break, but it is possible.  Unlike drug addictions, you can't swear off sex for good.  Eventually you'll need to have it again, whether with a partner, or even pay or have a one night stand to blow off tension.  The question is how often should you pay for sex?  Well once a week, is definitely unnecessary and too much.  Basically I think the moment you feel the sexual tension coming up that is when it is a good time to go.  This is probably after 2 to 3 months, but I'm not exactly sure to be honest.  I am not talking about a craving to have sex, that could happen after even a few days.

"From my experience I'm not a great believer in the notion of sexual tension that needs to be satiated.  In the moments before all of my 'indulgences' lately I didn't have an overiding sense of horniness.  Don't get me wrong, I've felt horny but I know that I can carry on happily throughout the day without paying for it.  And knowing this I still do it."

Hmm, well if you were happier without sex, then just quit cold turkey.  If you have to stay away for a year from sex unless you get a girlfriend during that time and then after the year is up you can pay for sex, but in a more responsible manner such every few months, whatever works for you.  I recommend you try to quit on your own, but if you can't, you'll need to get support whether online or in rehab.

"The reason(s) why I pay for sex are not very clear to me at all, which is probably why I have had so much difficulty in overcoming it.  As I've said, there have been times where I've felt like I've finally overcome the habit for good.  Where I've felt extremely positive and good about myself knowing I've finally beat something that's been a burden for so long.  But then, just on my way home from work or something I just give in just like that.  Sometimes it's more pre-meditated but sometimes it's not. Sometimes I get close to going but manage to resist, but then the next day the same thing happens again but I give in."

Have you heard of inner gold?  I haven't used the program personally, but I've watched videos of it discussing porn, sex and masturbation addiction and I found the information they were giving to be very helpful, maybe you should check it out:

http://www.innergold.com/

"In terms of moderating my addiction I could probably do it somewhat effectively but it won't be reliable.  When at the brothel it's very easy to feel indifferent to the amount of money I spend there.  Often after a 'punt' I don't feel satisfied and so go for another one immediately afterwards.  What I would budget myself to spend on prostitutes for a month I could easily spend in a day.  Even with this Saturday rule I've been following lately I've been partaking multiple times on the same day."

I can't relate to this as I have had a porn addiction and didn't have to worry about spending money.  However, I'm sure porn and sex addiction are similar in a primal level.  Yeah, maybe you should change the Saturday rule to be once in that day, because if you have sex 5 times in Saturday, it kind of ruins the point of Saturday rule.  It seems like you are well off and you could afford this addiction, but eventually it will destroy you like any other addiction and it is only a matter of time.  I suggest you keep this under control before it is too late.

I want to know though have you ever had sex without paying ever in your life?

Former_Addict

Nov 06, 2010

To: casper00

"I reckon you are Former addict pissed off that me and Myron made peace. Maybe Im wrong ethier way who cares"

"Wow just noticed you calling me and flexipan the same person, You really do have paranoid problems, clearly a odd ball"

LOL

flexiplan

Nov 06, 2010

"Yeah, maybe you should change the Saturday rule to be once in that day, because if you have sex 5 times in Saturday, it kind of ruins the point of Saturday rule. "

The point of the Saturday Rule is not moderation.  Instead it is an attempt to wear down the addiction as it were.

A few times in the past I adopted this and once I managed to go for a Saturday without prostitutes I got a fair amount of clean weeks, around six for instance.

I think it will be much easier to beat my addiction if I only have to get past the 'checkpoint' once a week.  If I train myself to only indulge in the habit on Saturadays the rest of the days of the week will no longer be an issue.

Another reason for the rule is that I am wasting money and indulging in a controlled fashion.  What I'm hopefully doing is proving to myself that each time I indulge I make the choice to do so before hand.  If I only pay for sex on Saturdays it's proof that I have a level of control.

"It seems like you are well off and you could afford this addiction, but eventually it will destroy you like any other addiction and it is only a matter of time."

Lately I've been spending a lot of money on the habit and setting back my savings goals significantly.  But hopefully soon I will get back into full abstinence.

The habit is sometimes not too much of an issue financially but mentally it is quite taxing.  Going to a brothel in a new fancy car isn't exactly the best feeling in the world.

"I want to know though have you ever had sex without paying ever in your life?"

No.  And if I had never gotten into the habit of paying for sex I'm pretty damn sure I wouldn't still be a 'virgin'.

I view paying for sex as a form of 'cheating'.  Yes, I get sex but only because I hand over some cash.  I don't think it can even be regarded as the same as having a girlfriend whom you've got to take out occasionally and spend money on in order to keep her to continue 'bonking'.  At least with that scenario you're taking yourself out as well.

Havind said this though I don't have a strong motivation to go out and try to get it unpaid.

I think I want the first time to be special and natural as opposed to something I've achieved by just hooking up with someone from a dating/sex site or from picking up a drunk **** from a club.

Myron_Long

Nov 06, 2010

To: flexiplan

You have a unique way of thinking when it comes to getting sex. But to each's own...

casper00

Nov 06, 2010

I never said prostitution is better than casual sex I just saying there is no hidden strings attached to the former.

Myron_Long

Nov 06, 2010

To: casper00

To me, paying for sex is similar to masturbation. Both, you would feel excited to do it in the beginning but once it's all over, you feel stupid, depressed, manipulated, etc.

There is nothing exciting about paying women for sex.

casper00

Nov 06, 2010

Will done you are doing a much better job at wording your sentences so they are expressing a opinion's rather than stating 'so called facts' Notice it doesn't **** people off when you do this. . Keep up the good work.

casper00

Nov 06, 2010

Yes to point you are correct, anyhow I'm sure you know I don't recommend either

Former_Addict

Nov 07, 2010

To: flexiplan

"Another reason for the rule is that I am wasting money and indulging in a controlled fashion.  What I'm hopefully doing is proving to myself that each time I indulge I make the choice to do so before hand.  If I only pay for sex on Saturdays it's proof that I have a level of control."

That's good that you are trying to control yourself, but you should definitely phase it out slowly.  Like first try to limit one visit each Saturday as opposed to unlimited and then finally phase it out until you only visit it once a month.  To get to that point, you might have to quit prostitutes for a long time like several months to even a year and then switch to once a month, but do what works for you.

"I think I want the first time to be special and natural as opposed to something I've achieved by just hooking up with someone from a dating/sex site or from picking up a drunk **** from a club."

Well the first step is conquering your sex addiction, once you do this you'll be ready to pursue a relationship with a woman.  Plus you have a lot of money and are well to do, so this should be a bonus in helping you get a woman.  If you conquer your sex addiction and then your masturbation addiction, I think your life will begin to improve substantially.

Good luck :)

Former_Addict

Nov 07, 2010

To: casper00

"Will done you are doing a much better job at wording your sentences so they are expressing a opinion's rather than stating 'so called facts' Notice it doesn't **** people off when you do this. . Keep up the good work."

I try ;)

flexiplan

Nov 07, 2010

"That's good that you are trying to control yourself, but you should definitely phase it out slowly."

Unfortuantely, I don't think that's possible. Every time I partake is a failure. I regret those times where I moderated my addiction to once a fortnight because it was with those times I kept my addiction going when I could have easily stopped it for good.

Soon, when I feel I'm ready, I'm going to stop for good. In fact, if I choose to make it past the upcoming Saturday that will hopefully signify the end of my prostitute addiction.

"Good luck :) "

Thanks. :)

Myron_Long

Nov 07, 2010

To: flexiplan

""That's good that you are trying to control yourself, but you should definitely phase it out slowly."

Unfortuantely, I don't think that's possible. Every time I partake is a failure. I regret those times where I moderated my addiction to once a fortnight because it was with those times I kept my addiction going when I could have easily stopped it for good.

Soon, when I feel I'm ready, I'm going to stop for good. In fact, if I choose to make it past the upcoming Saturday that will hopefully signify the end of my prostitute addiction. "

>>>Flexiplan I think the only way you can get away from that addiction is by meeting yourself a nice woman.

sthenelaidas

Nov 08, 2010

hia men, you guys are outta controll, few months of ignoring ur mstrbtion and u end up fighting battles wit each other in the internet, get a grip dudes!!! just post ur method and any questions u have of other peoples methods and that should be it!!!! i jack off once in a while i cant stop, i get too horny to distract myself from doing it, what can i do???

casper00

Nov 09, 2010

To: sthenelaidas

If you really want to stop, just dont fkn touch the bloody thing in the first place. Dont even have a little fiddle. Thier a old saying 'use it or lose it', It a myth . Works better when it counts if ya dont toss the bacon. will i think so anyhow.

Myron_Long

Nov 10, 2010

To: EVERYONE

I would like to know if you're experiencing any changes in your penis since you stop masturbating.

For example, its almost 2 months since I stopped and the sensitivity in my penis has definitely increased. 3 nights ago, this woman was giving me a handjob thru my boxers and I had to stop her because it was feeling too too good PLUS I wanted some real sex, not ejaculation inside my underwear. LOL...

The old me (when I was masturbating all the time) wouldn't have felt that much pleasure from a handjob probably because a woman's hand can't stroke me better than my own hand. I didn't realize a handjob could feel so wonderful!

I am definitely loving my new sex life (with no masturbation). I wish I could go back 10 years and do this all over again.

Lonewolfof90

Nov 10, 2010

Well I am uncircumcised so my penis stays sensitive most of the time anyway.Some times my penis hurts, but maybe this is just a side affect from not masturbating when my body has been so used to it.

Myron_Long

Nov 10, 2010

How does it hurt? Details please...

Lonewolfof90

Nov 11, 2010

Well it is not a burning sensation, thank God. However, every now and then I get a throbbing pressure in my penis that extends down to my testicles. It feels really weird almost like a cramp in my manly parts. Thankfully, I don't get it very often.

Lonewolfof90

Nov 11, 2010

I am thinking it could be the result of semen build up. Did you experience anything like this the first time you quit masturbation?

Myron_Long

Nov 11, 2010

No but I used to experience all kinds of feelings in my penis, testicles and groin area when I did masturbate. I haven't felt any sense I stopped. But I can't give a justify opinion on your matter because since I stop masturbating, I managed to have real sex on average of once every 2 weeks. My sperm has not build up over a 2 week period.

Myron_Long

Nov 13, 2010

To: EVERYONE

I just want to say I really love my penis now. I wish I could go back in time and get a 2nd chance with all the women I sexually disappointed. To those women, I sincerely apologize and I vow to never let it happen again.

For now on, I will never touch my penis and my penis belongs to you.

casper0_0

Nov 14, 2010

Myron all you seem to want to talk about is your penis or other peoples penis's Dont be offended but I am wondering if you are perhaps gay or at the very least bisexual.

Myron_Long

Nov 14, 2010

To: casper0_0

I am strictly clitly, does that answer your question Casper?

And I didn't ask people to talk about their penis in a way like how big it is, what it look like, etc. That would be gay...

I am asking people to state any differences they are noticing with their penis since they no longer masturbate or watch porn.

casper0_0

Nov 14, 2010

Will I thought real men loved women not thier own penis's. If a man here says 'he loves his penis' he would be considered a egotistic freak maybe it's different in your country.
Their is more to life than porn and sex every thing in moderation is the key.

Myron_Long

Nov 14, 2010

okay

Former_Addict

Nov 14, 2010

To: casper0_0

"Their is more to life than porn and sex every thing in moderation is the key."

Hey casper, it's nice to see we are on the same page with something for once. I'm curious, how long have you lasted so far without masturbation? Several months? How are you dealing with the pent up stress and sexual frustration? I'm still going on with the once a week and so far it's pretty easy for me to do, but I do plan to switch to once a month in the near future.

Myron_Long

Nov 14, 2010

God forbid if you ask Casper a question he already answered in the forum back on Nov 5th...

"I dont know when the last time was, would have been close to two mths I think, I'm not tracking anything. Yes its a worry about ejuculation and i feel like i going to explode some times.It would be so easy to toss the bacon however i try to just enjoy the feeling its nice in a way feeling loaded, fustrating but in away it has its benefits. Any how if i do full short and toss the bacon I will just start over again. One thing for certain I'm not going to beat myself up. I see lots of benifents espillay in my complextion. I now blush around women i find attractive at first i found it embarrassing, but women find it cute. "

>>>>Dont' want him to chew you up over the internet again...

Former_Addict

Nov 14, 2010

"God forbid if you ask Casper a question he already answered in the forum back on Nov 5th..."

">>>>Dont' want him to chew you up over the internet again... "

Haha okay thanks Myron_Long. I have a question for you. Do you think it's possible for you to quit porn completely? I know you quit masturbating completely, so obviously watching porn won't affect you sexually. However, if you quit porn completely, I think it will give you some benefits mentally. Especially since you get laid on average once every two weeks, it shouldn't be too difficult for you to quit porn completely just like you did with masturbation just to gain the mental benefits.

casper0_0

Nov 14, 2010

Good question Former addict and I think what I said in the pass is misleading as I made it sound like I am always horny and frustrated however this is not the case. In the beginning I suppose I was (after about 2 weeks). Now it goes in phases normally after a trigger. I avoid porn at all costs and have come full circle now I think it disgusting. However triggers are everywhere as women wear 'stuff all' here and I am a red bloodied male.

The key is not to lust (which is impossible ). So when I lust (think sexy thoughts) when no one is around, at home , I just acknowledge the thought and let it pass I also pray to god to give me strength. If I think impure thoughts when others are around like the doctors office , driving etc, I just go with it because I know I cant touch it in public so I safe. Its good to see it working without me having to touch it. However , this has lend to some embarrassing 'hard on's' in embarrassing places  and one has no choice but to shift ones thoughts. So I guess I play head games with myself for fun

Any how, God is my weapon and I am thankful for the person I am becoming. Its like I only attract nice  women now. Although I don't officially have a girlfriend I have many angels (nice women) in my life  I think porn makes a person sordid .

I understand we differ on this and  I'm not picking a fight but to me porn and masturbation are the same thing. I admit some times it is hard for me as I get really horny other days it is easy. I leave myself in gods hands.

Former_Addict

Nov 14, 2010

To: casper0_0

"I understand we differ on this and  I'm not picking a fight but to me porn and masturbation are the same thing. I admit some times it is hard for me as I get really horny other days it is easy. I leave myself in gods hands."

Yeah I remember when, I stayed away from masturbation for a month, that's how it pretty much was, some days were really easy and I felt awesome and then other days were pure hell and I just had to weather the storm.  I could definitely relate to the hard ons for no reason or for little reasons like talking to a woman, it reminds me of when I was a teenager.  However, I think it's better to have hard-ons for no reason then struggling to have one when it counts.

Good luck on your abstinence, if you use God to keep you going that's good, for me just believing in myself seemed to work.  I plan to switch to once a month very soon as once a week is no longer a challenge for me and the benefits aren't as good as when you stop for a whole month, and maybe one day I'll quit for good.

I do agree that in the end complete abstinence is always better then doing it once in a blue moon.  However, it's like fast food, sure you can quit for the rest of your life and you'll be at your healthiest, but if you limit it to once a month I'm sure you can live healthy as well as opposed to when you eat it everyday where it can be incredibly unhealthy or once a week where it won't be so healthy for you.

Myron_Long

Nov 15, 2010

"Haha okay thanks Myron_Long. I have a question for you. Do you think it's possible for you to quit porn completely? I know you quit masturbating completely, so obviously watching porn won't affect you sexually. However, if you quit porn completely, I think it will give you some benefits mentally. Especially since you get laid on average once every two weeks, it shouldn't be too difficult for you to quit porn completely just like you did with masturbation just to gain the mental benefits. "

>>>> The only way I quit watching porn is if I get bored watching it. When I home alone and bored (even though I should be able to find something else to do), I'll start to a look at some porn but it don't be for hours though. It may be a couple scenes. But it ain't just porn. I know sites where I can watch real down to earth women get naked on live webcams FOR FREE. So there is always some entertainment on the web when it comes to women nudity. And I also toggle back n forth thru sites (non-sex related) I'm visiting on the web like medhelp...So, if I'm on the computer, might as well take a glimpse to see what's going on...

The only other way I may stop watching porn is being in a relationship that's keeping me occupied most of my time (unless she would like to watch porn too).

Overall, I don't think I'll ever quit, just watch it in moderation. Simply because it's free and always available... And still no masturbation.

clockcleaner229

Nov 15, 2010

To: everyone

OK i can't believe that this is a big argument know if you don't want to masturbate don't , if you need to do it do it and if you need to use a aid like porn to do it well use it a aid dose note mean you have a addiction , if you you don't need a aid to jerk off and you are jerking off 3 to 4 times a day then you have a problem! Look i went i for a prostate check and the doctor said that i had a enlarged prostate, he told me it was not a problem yet but told me it could turn in to cancer , and i needed to take some steps to help prevent it! 1. he put me on men's health vitamins & 2. he told me to have sex 2 to 3 times a day ! Now I haven't had sex that much scence high school and try talking your partner in to doing it that much between work and your everyday life well thats not going to happen she like a every other day girl not a every day girl! so if you have sex 3 time a week and jerk off 3 times a week and use porn to get exited to do it there is nothing wrong with that but if you have to use porn to get exited so you can have sex well YOU NEED TO SEE A DOCTOR because that is a real problem

flexiplan

Nov 15, 2010

To: heh

I'm really happy with myself that I hardly masturbate at all these days.  Sure, I still have a couple of slip-ups every now and then but that's because I'm not fully commited to abstinence sometimes; particularly due to my frustration with my addiction to prostitutes.  And even when I do 'slip-up' I don't go on a masturbation binge afterwards.  Instead I increase my resolve to keep clean.

These days I absolutely refuse to masturbate with imagination.  I don't mind watching porn but I HATE masturbating to porn.  I don't like masturbating whilst imaging doing it with someone.

What I find with this is what without the imagination, without the porn, and without fantasizing, it's a lot harder to build up to orgasm.  Sure, if I stroke fast enough I can force an ejaculation but that seems pointless.  And just stroking normally trying to enjoy the moment is dead boring - it's pointless.

One of the reasons why I don't view masturbation favourably is I think it is conducive to having a habit of ejaculating prematurely whilst having sex.  With sex - if it's good - one does not need to imagine anything at all because it's happening right there in front of your face.  You can 'stoke' at a steady pace and still feel enjoyment without having to go in the mind.  But with typical masturbation, I find, it's just imagine the most erotic thing you can, beat it till you almost ***, hold off, start again and repeat the process until you can't hold back any longer or decide to *** just to finish the stupid process.

With sex it's slightly different.  One can just go steadily and look at the wallpaper or something and still have loads of fun.  Masturbation trains the mind to always suck all the eroticism out of the moment and use it to get up to cumming as quickly as possible.

I think one of the reasons why I still have this prostitute addiction is because I have gotten somewhat of a handle over sex compared to my earlier years.  Often in the early years I would come about as soon as I stuck it in.  But now, possibly thanks to managing to overcome masturbation, I can usually last as long as I want to.

I really hope that soon I can move this over to 'real' women whom I'm not paying to give pleasure too.

Myron_Long

Nov 15, 2010

To: flexiplan

"One of the reasons why I don't view masturbation favourably is I think it is conducive to having a habit of ejaculating prematurely whilst having sex.  With sex - if it's good - one does not need to imagine anything at all because it's happening right there in front of your face.  You can 'stoke' at a steady pace and still feel enjoyment without having to go in the mind.  But with typical masturbation, I find, it's just imagine the most erotic thing you can, beat it till you almost ***, hold off, start again and repeat the process until you can't hold back any longer or decide to *** just to finish the stupid process.

With sex it's slightly different.  One can just go steadily and look at the wallpaper or something and still have loads of fun.  Masturbation trains the mind to always suck all the eroticism out of the moment and use it to get up to cumming as quickly as possible. "

>>>>>I remember in my younger 20's days  I used to put ky lube on my penis head and it would feel SO GOOD as I stroke it. And at that time I didn't need an imagination to reach ejaculation (because it felt so good)...

Maybe like a few months ago (now in my 30's), I started realizing that when I stroke my penis with the ky lube, it wasn't feeling all that great. I then had to start using my imagination or porn to help me get off. I gave it some heavy thought and realized why I was losing my erection during sex. It was because during masturbation, my mind or visual was getting me off, but with real sex, the mind and visual does not help that much. What was missing from the sex was that pleasureable sensitivity in the penis head THAT I USE TO FEEL BACK IN MY 20'S... I figured that dumb behind has been rubbing away the sensitivity all these years.

So this part of the reason why I decided to stop touching my penis, to try to bring back the sensitivity in my penis head so I can enjoy sex more.

casper0_0

Nov 15, 2010

To flexipan
I didn't understand your post properly are you saying that you don't masturbate to porn (pictures or internet etc) or by fantasying (imagination). So dose that mean you just tuck away thinking about nothing but just doing it for the sensation. I'm confused.

To Former addict
I did the once a week thing for ages to tell ya the the truth I didn't see much difference in the difference between masturbating daily and once a week. But perhaps that was just personal to me.Sure I admit after a day or two the down feeling disappears when doing once a week however I still had no real zeal for everyday activities and also it stopped me forming normal relationship. I'm sure some people can wank daily or even just weekly and still form normal relationships all I'm saying is I couldn't. Wanking is the easy and safe way in life but its also pretty boring.

To cockcleaner
I never heard that before, That a person with a enlarged prostrate should have sex twice a day to prevent cancer. I would get a second opinion if I was you. Sounds like crap to me.

To Myron
The porn you watch will bite you in the arse when you least expect it. You will want more and more and your tastes will get more and more extreme. But your life I suppose. Who cares.

Myron_Long

Nov 15, 2010

To: casper0_0

I value your opinion but you need to learn how to give an opinion without stating whether you care about that person's thoughts or not...

Stating "who cares" after giving your opinion clearly shows you have an obnoxious way of holding a conversation.

People on here letting their heart out about their problems and you're quick to make people sound like they are idiots just because you disagree with what they are trying to say.

"The porn you watch will bite you in the arse when you least expect it. You will want more and more and your tastes will get more and more extreme. But your life I suppose. Who cares"

You don't know what will bite me in the arse because you're not GOD. And no I will not want more and more and my tastes will not get more and more extreme because I have already been there and came back! And yes it is my life and not for you to judge. And who cares if you do respond back to this post. Can't believe I'm feeding into your immature, egotistical, behind the computer arrogance ways. I guess that's a gift you have, pissing somebody off over the internet.

flexiplan

Nov 15, 2010

To: casper0_0

"I didn't understand your post properly are you saying that you don't masturbate to porn (pictures or internet etc) or by fantasying (imagination). So dose that mean you just tuck away thinking about nothing but just doing  it for the sensation. I'm confused."

That's right.  In a way it's a second defense mechanism.  I don't want to masturbate in the first place but if I do I sure as hell am not going to 'fantasize' while doing it.

What's often the case is that while I watch porn I think having a wank would be quite nice.  But after I stop watching I immediately lose all my horniness but I still sometimes go ahead and wank anyway which is pretty stupid.

I haven't wanked for a long, long time just out of sheer horniess.

Former_Addict

Nov 15, 2010

>>>> The only way I quit watching porn is if I get bored watching it. When I home alone and bored (even though I should be able to find something else to do), I'll start to a look at some porn but it don't be for hours though. It may be a couple scenes. But it ain't just porn. I know sites where I can watch real down to earth women get naked on live webcams FOR FREE. So there is always some entertainment on the web when it comes to women nudity. And I also toggle back n forth thru sites (non-sex related) I'm visiting on the web like medhelp...So, if I'm on the computer, might as well take a glimpse to see what's going on...

The only other way I may stop watching porn is being in a relationship that's keeping me occupied most of my time (unless she would like to watch porn too).

Overall, I don't think I'll ever quit, just watch it in moderation. Simply because it's free and always available... And still no masturbation.

Well, it's your choice, and watching porn without masturbation is nowhere near as bad as watching porn whilst masturbating. I guess you use porn as a form of entertainment in the same way someone uses video games for entertainment, but of course one needs to do so in moderation. Well, if anything maybe you should switch to just girls showing off at webcams as long as you don't masturbate, but personally watching porn or looking at webcam girls without masturbating isn't something I can do because I'll just explode with sexual tension lol and eventually give in and masturbate.

Former_Addict

Nov 15, 2010

To: casper0_0

"I did the once a week thing for ages to tell ya the the truth I didn't see much difference in the difference between  masturbating daily  and once a week. But perhaps that was just personal to me.Sure I admit after a day or two the down feeling disappears when doing once a week however I still had no real  zeal for everyday activities and also it stopped me forming  normal relationship. I'm sure some people can wank daily or even just weekly and still form normal relationships  all I'm saying is I couldn't. Wanking is the easy and safe way in life but its also pretty boring."

Well that explains why you were against it before, maybe that information would of been more useful in our previous arguments -_-.  Anyways, for myself there is a noticeable difference between masturbating daily and masturbating weekly.  However, the benefits to not become apparent until around the 5th or 6th day without masturbating, so it is kind of short lived.  I heard it's because of the rise in testosterone and of course the mental energy starts to kick in around then.

Of course, I'm starting to agree that once a week isn't the best way to go even though it is an improvement over doing it daily.  I've been doing once a week now for 2 months now, and I do feel amazing by the end of the week, but during the week I am going through a recharging period.  I do plan to switch to once a month very soon as I feel the benefits will be much more noticeable, I just need to learn to manage the stress and I think meditation and exercise is the answer for me.

I think once a week is good if you like to go to clubs and bars at the weekend and want that testosterone boost, higher confidence and mental energy to pick up women.  However, during the weekdays you will still be pretty bogged down and not able to do much.  Of course the extra boost isn't going to help much if you lack the experience in picking up women to begin with.  I do think in the end, I'd have to switch to at least once a month if I want to form a relationship with a woman because of course once a week does help somewhat, but it still isn't enough.

casper0_0

Nov 15, 2010

Myron , I didn't mean to upset you. I just don't care because you yourself clearly don't care. In fact you seem proud of all the porn you watch. Actually I'm not playing god and you are the one that uses gods name in vain. On one hand you say you understand its a sin yet on the other you are proud of it and have no intention of giving up.

It will bite ya in the arse in the future that isn't me playing God , its common sense and if you really had of been their and come back you would understand what I mean. It will become ingrained in your life so much , that even when/if you meet a nice women you will need to watch porn to be simulated.. Many women if not most hate porn and find it a turn off and even consider their partner cheating if they watch porn. (in a way it is). Maybe you just to busy watching porn to understand when people trying to help you. I understand that you don't know that you have a problem, so it a waste of time trying to explain so in other words 'who cares'

casper0_0

Nov 15, 2010

To: flexiplan

Wow flexipan dose it still work even when a person doesn't fantasize or use pictures. I remember the first time I tucked must have been about 12 I tucked away without pictures all mental pictures. I thought it was a adolescent thing that we grew out out of. Interesting I never thought adults could still do it this way but then I guess I never tried. Must be boring.

flexiplan

Nov 16, 2010

To: casper0_0

"Wow flexipan dose it still work even when a person doesn't fantasize or use pictures. I remember the first time I tucked must have been about 12  I tucked away without pictures all mental pictures. I thought it was a adolescent thing that we grew out out of. Interesting I never thought adults could still do it this way but then I guess I never tried. Must be boring."

Initially it can be intersting but overall, yes, it is boring.  Doesn't mean it's that easy to stop while doing it though although it's definitely possible.  Last time I 'played with myself' I put my pants back on before I came.

Believe it or not, I think this 'plain' wanking came out of watching porn more than anything else.  Specifically, wathcing porn without wanking.  When I used to wank whilst wathcing porn it was fun.  But whenever I wanked after watching porn without wanking it was pretty crap.

farxxx

Nov 18, 2010

Are their any side effects of watching nude girls ???

the_big_gorilla

Nov 18, 2010

I struggle with pornography, I've struggled with it for a long time now. I was only 4 years old when I first had sex, (I'm sorry if this sounds disturbing, I don't like it, and I just want help) it was with my friends, we were what we thought was "playing a game", I first saw hard-core porn when I was 9 years old, some of my friends found it in the garbage in a public park. I didn't see any porn after that. Last time when I had sex with a friend is when I was 12, but it wasn't to long after that I got a hold of porn again, but this time another friend introduced me to it, we didn't have sex, we would just watch it and masturbate. Ever since I've continued to look at porn and masturbate to today, and I really want to STOP, because it has destroyed my life in so many ways, and I know it can be fixed if I just stop watching porn starting today and never ever look at it again, and to never have to masturbate as well, for I'm addicted to the both of them. I love women, I really do, and because of that, I know I shouldn't be looking at porn, lusting after them, it's disgusting, their is so much inner beauty in them, and I really admire my mom, she was a single mother raising since I was 12, she has no idea whatsoever about my dark-side, matter a fact, she's very convinced that I don't have these problems, but I can't tell her, not ever, I just want to get treatment and get on with my life. I'm 21 years old, I don't belief in premarital sex, I want to find a mature woman who I can love forever, and who I can hold, and she can hold me, and if she knows of my problems (hopefully they won't be problems when I'm a married man) that she still loves me and trusts me and that when we go through trial we can cry together. I'm a strong Christian and I pray to God after every time I encounter porn and masturbate to just give me that strength, and many times he has, and I overcame it at that time, but many time I also decided to not listen and go my own path and watch it on my computer screen, but I know he still loves me, nothing will take that away. I love life, it's beautiful, but it can be so much more better if I just get away from this problem. I've gotten a lot better at not watching it, but it still doesn't cut it, now I usually don't watch it unless I see an imagine by mistake, if it popped up unexpectingly. But sometimes I still get those urges to look at it, and a lot of the times I give in to those urges, because it's like an itch I have to scratch, to get those sexual feelings through pornography and to satisfy myself through masturbation, it's like I get these urges and I can't think straight, it's as if my all my other thoughts are darkened and the spot light on shines on those sexual urges and I have a time getting them off the stage, and it's hard to find some kind of distraction to get away from it. What should I do? Could I please get some advice? I'm tired and I want to rest away from these problems. Thanks.

Meilena_MHModerator

Nov 18, 2010

Please remember that everyone here is entitled to their opinions and feelings on this subject, please be respectful of other members even when you are disagreeing.

casper0_0

Nov 18, 2010

To: the big_gorilla

Firstly look at the positives . 1/ You are young so have the time to confront the problem before it becomes to late. 2/ you reconise that you have a problem, not like some here that think looking at porn makes them some sort of stud and a cure to their problems (yer I know silly) 3/ You have god on your side. Yes I know some times it feels like he has abandoned us but he gives us the tools its up to us to use them.

I understand what you say about porn/masturbation being their in the mind trying to drive you back to it. Its all about mind over matter changing thought patterns. Easier said than done I know. But with trail an error you will get their. Its hard in today's society when psychologists promote masturbation as natural and part of a healthy sex life. Which it isn't. Especially when done excessively

As I have said before , don't touch it in the first place its to easy to just give it a little touch not planning to masturbate however one thing leads to another. The other key I use is to keep active especially on my days off. I redirect the physical energy to sport (boxing) or the gym (weights) or just go for a long run. Good luck , God be with you.

the_big_gorilla

Nov 18, 2010

To: casper0_0

Thank you very much. I'll really keep he exercise in mind, that sounds like something that could help me clear my mind. I keep fighting, I fight everyday, when I'm really strong I can go a week without it. So thank you. As soon as I can I plan on seeing some kind of therapist, but until then I just go to keep strong and keep up my faith.

meg800

Nov 19, 2010

To: guys in general

I really feel for you guys troubled by porn addiction. I am a woman and work on a mens counselling service (telephone) and often get calls from guys distressed about this problem. When I raised my boys, the internet did not exist and i am so grateful for that. I think it has done so much to undermine our young men and so many addicted, and very hard to break, it's so compelling and easily accessible but just ends up being a soul -less activity for most and pretty grubby too, now also in so many homes and parents do not practice what I call "porn hygiene" and kids young and younger are becoming tainted horribly by what they see. Get help, there are programs, there are therapist specialising, the sex industry knows it has you over a barrel they're a bunch of exploitative people who do not care about your welfare.

take care of yourselves spiritually...sitting alone at a computer masturbating to a screen is really bad for your mind body and spirit, and for your development as a human being.....you're just so much better than that

casper0_0

Nov 19, 2010

To: meg

Thank you it is nice to get a perspective from a women. Any how I think the problem was here before the internet, it used to be be just porn mags and Video's . However I agree it is more readily available and graphic thanks to the internet.

Former_Addict

Nov 21, 2010

To: meg800

"take care of yourselves spiritually...sitting alone at a computer masturbating to a screen is really bad for your mind body and spirit, and for your development as a human being.....you're just so much better than that"

Very true Meg, I was addicted to porn where I used to watch it every single day for two years straight and it slowly degraded by mind, body and spirit over time. The thing about porn it takes a long time and consistent usage to take effect, but after a year, the damage becomes very noticeable. I haven't watched porn for over 6 months and haven't looked back, and I definitely feel a significant improvement. However, I can't help but feel that it's scarred me in some way, but in the end there's nothing I can do about it, but go on with my life.

the_big_gorilla

Nov 22, 2010

To: casper0_0

I don't get it, sometimes it just doesn't seem fair to develop sexual problems at such a young age, starting at the age of 4, it just doesn't seem right, I was a child, how was I suppose to know, and now it seems like I'm being punished, that my punishment is this addiction. Sometimes I wonder why it has to be this way. I know God gives us weakness so that we may humble ourselves, but I humbled myself in front of God so many times, am I just not humble enough, I don't understand what I would be doing wrong, I know God hears my prayer, he's answered many of them, but I still don't understand it, I've been fighting this addiction for about 7 years now, when I was around 14, that's when I started realizing that porn really is bad, I didn't know in what ways on how really bad it was, but I knew it was wrong, I came to that understanding when this guy came to my school and gave this big talk in front of every student in the school. He talked about relationships, the difference between boys and girls, and how sex before marriage can really effect that relationship, even after marriage with that same person. When he explained that, that's when it hit me that I needed to stop looking at pornography, because it could just lead to sex, I think at the time I had some porn mags I got from a friend, which he got it from his dad (I guess more like stole it from him) which I ended up throwing away, I remember I was also being sneaky about so that nobody would find out what I've been looking at, but years went by, and I don't even know how many countless times it was when I got more mags and then later threw them away, later got some more, and then threw them away, later even got DVDs and mags and threw them away, it seemed like an endless cycle. I don't own any porn anymore, I don't want it laying around my room and tucking it away so nobody would see, now it's just all on the computer, so why would I need the material laying around in my room. I wish porn on the internet didn't exist, because I can't get rid of my computer, I need it, and I need the internet as well, and I can't place the computer anywhere else in the house but in my room, I wish I could, but it's not going to work in my place, my space is downstairs, everybody else's expect for my step-brothers is upstairs, and it just wouldn't work. I don't know what to do about my situation. Is there any advice you can give me. Thank you.

casper000

Nov 22, 2010

To: the_big_gorilla

Meg can probably help more than me but I will do my best,  Firstly I wouldn't beat yourself up' its so common especially  at your age but as I said at least you understand you have a problem. Even if you got rid of  the computer it would make no difference. As I said its all about changing thought processes. When you successfully stop masturbating (commonly, daily,) you will find that soft porn, porn that wouldn't normally excite you all that much will. For example just a sexy women in tight jeans will really turn you on. Sure it would turn you on even if you you were exposing yourself to porn. However because you haven't been watching porn (desensitizing your brain) it will turn you on more  than if you had been exposing /simulating  yourself  to porn.

So my point is you cant escape porn it is everywhere in western culture. So you have to except its their and learn to live around it. Easier said than done. Man its hard,but after a while it gets easier. I don't avoid looking at sexy women and thinking impure thoughts (prolly a sin ) however I only think impure thoughts  in public, because I know I'm not going to flop it out and start tossing it. I never let my self lust when alone. Sure I start to but then  tell myself off and stop. I never look at porn  when alone espillay on the net. Some times I might look at the mags when in a bookstore with out buying it just for a cheap trill after all I am human and do admire the female form.

I was once highly addicted to porn internet/ prostitute's  and even lost a long term relationship from it.  I went cold turkey and gave it all way after trail and error. It took many attempts  So what I am saying is don't worry to much if you fail its all part of the process, maybe try former addicts method until you are ready to give it away. He only jerks once a week, (With out porn) maybe increase the intervals to say two weeks to a mth etc.

From a  religious perspective I look at porn as the enemy, Saturn playing temptation games, he is a sneaky bugger he knows our flaws and exploits them. Remember God is a forgiving God just keep trying and praying. The temptation even when you give up will always be their just learn to live around it. May god be with you

Lonewolfof90

Nov 22, 2010

To: the_big_gorilla,

Wow! You and me have so much in common it is ridiculous! I know how you feel man. It can be so tough and the temptation to watch and masturbate is like a strong magnet pulling you in. I too have had the same battle with pornography and masturbation. Almost 5 years until I decided I needed to make a change in my life. It wasn't in any way easy and I would be lying if I told you it was. Like Casper00 said, it is the impure thoughts that lead you to masturbate. You can throw away all your mags, dvds, and even destroy your computer, but as long as the images are in your head than nothing will change. That is the source and once you conquer it than you will be on the right track to a better life. Just keep telling yourself that it is wrong and God does not approve of it. Realize the filthiness of it and then think about how much you can contribute to the world in a positive way. The people in porn have low self-esteem and are selling their bodies for quick cash. They are not contributing anything to society and have nothing to offer because all they know how to do is have sex.

When you think of it that way it kind of makes it easier to quit. Masturbation and porn are no different than drugs. They make you feel good at first, but then after wards deplete your energy and leave you tired and craving for more. It messes with your brain and takes your mind away from more important things like school and work. Don't believe those idiots that tell you it is a healthy and natural way to relieve sexual stress. The hand was not designed for the penis! When you masturbate you lose interest in real women and depend on the hand as stimulation. But from reading Casper00 and Myron_Long post it apparently makes it harder to gain erections with actual women. You seem like you really want to quit and that is a good thing. So many people are wasting there life away masturbating and watching porn when they could have done so many wonderful things and making an impact on the next generation. I have made up my mind that I do not want to be one of those people and I know you can too!

the_big_gorilla

Nov 22, 2010

To: casper000 and Lonewolfof90

Thanks guys. I guess sometimes I try to give myself the thought that I don't want to end up like that old creepy guy that looks at porn and checks out women that are less then half his age, I seen people like that, I remember seeing this old creepy looking guy in the public library looking at porn on the public computers, when I saw that it was just weird and creepy at the same time and I just thought to myself that I don't want to be like that, yuck. Well, I keep fighting, just lost a battle a couple of minutes ago, but the war is NOT over, not until I win.

flexiplan

Nov 23, 2010

To: the_big_gorilla

Trying to remove the addictive quality to porn and masturbation is probably the best advice I can give.

I think one of the main reasons why you are stuggling a lot in overcoming your undesirable habits, Big Gorilla, is because you're addicted to the whole game of it all.  You view watching porn as a great sin and so you dither between the extremeties of purity and degradation.  No doubt you feel terribly upset with yourself after you 'give in'.

What I would suggest you try doing is getting out of your head somewhat and just not wank and watch porn because you choose to do so.  Not because it's bad or sinful.  You should just choose not to do those things because you don't want to participate in the activities within themselves.

This may be a hard concept to grasp but I mention it because it seems to be what has helped greatly in overcoming a lot of the temptation I used to have.

In the end, each time you give in it's because you chose to do so before hand.  We can complain about temptation/Satan/incessant impure thoughts all we want but ultimately regardless of those it's still us making the call.  Of course, it makes it a lot easier without the constant temptation and that's why I mention the concept above because it can possibly reduce the temptation dramatically.

Have a look at the activities of porn and wanking.  Ask yourself why you have such a hard time staying away from them.  Are they really that fun?  Watching people banging on a screen, do they really look like they're having fun?  What if you could be that dude, would it be all that great?

I myself wouldn't mind being a porn actor but how much entertainment can you give to the people who watch the overpriced ****?

Look at wanking.  Are you overcome with so much lust that you just have to beat it?  Or is it just the habitual thing to do while consuming porn?

To sum up, overcoming temptation is easy when there is none or at least very little.

flexiplan

Nov 24, 2010

That does it!  I am now adopting the same strategy I use to successfully overcome my masturbation addiction to hopefully successfully overcome my addiction to paying for sex.

Lately I have been moderating my spending habits somewhat but I am just throughly sick and tired of watching myself 'give in' and keeping the habit alive.  Yesterday I justified giving in and promised myself that I will get get ten clean days afterwards.  But despite my ability to perhaps get those ten clean days it is just too stressful.  One of the reasons is the thought that I will just give in again after the ten days is up, and then potentially go on a binge and waste a crap load of money.

With masturbation I no longer set targets of getting a certain amount of clean days.  Instead I just make the rule not to participate in the activity anymore.  How long I've been clean for is no longer a factor on whether I should give in or not.  And since this has helped immensely I am now going to transfer it to my prostitute addiction.

So, no more placing emphasis in counting clean days.  No more placing emphasis in setting myself a target of so and so clean days.  No more 'moderation'.  No more excuses and justifications.  Instead, I will just not participate in the activity of paying for sex anymore.  Like how I handle my wanking habit, I will just take it day by day.  Every moment - no more.

chakrakhan

Nov 27, 2010

I've struggled with sex addiction since I was in first grade. I didn't even know what masturbation was then of course, and couldn't even ***, but I knew it felt good & did it often. Progressed to porn addiction & masturbating 3+ times a day habit by high school. Picked up an expensive taste for hookers in my 20's, up to a 3x a day sometimes. Earlier this year I realized how these habits were weakening me & decided to change. To say it is one of the most difficult addictions to break is no exaggeration. Its said that the last temptation of Buddha before he became enlightened was craving, lust, & lechery. I've kicked pot & cigarette habits & they were nothing compared to sex addiction. The first step is to realize & accept how it is damaging you, limiting your relationships with other people, preventing and sabotaging your desire for real, lasting happiness. Kicking the habit is much, much harder as I'm sure you know. You need to replace your addictive behaviors with positive ones. Exercise is especially good giving you that physical release & regulates your sexual energy. Weightlifting is great & will boost your testosterone. Yoga and meditation are healthy ways to circulate your pent up sex drive & channel that energy into more constructive pursuits. Look into 'sexual transmutation' as discussed by Napoleon Hill in his book 'Think & Grow Richer.' As you get better at abstaining you will appreciate your higher energy levels and newfound clarity of mind. Above all you need to find a healthy outlet for all that energy whether its a healthy relationship, a group, an activity, profession, or whatever or you WILL relapse and fall into old behavior patterns. The temptation is so easy, and always there. Sometimes the temptation is too much, don't be too hard on yourself when you relapse. When it seems too much to take, appreciate and reflect on all the good changes abstinence has brought you, how much you've changed and the numbness and pain of addiction you are leaving behind. Stay the course. Best of luck my friend.

D_man1

Nov 29, 2010

To: Anyone that cares

I have struggled with this for a very long time. I started when I was prepubesent and didn't realise the damage I was doing until 15 years later. The habit was so bad there were times I couldn't leave the house for days at a time because I just 'had to' do it again and again.
I then did a course by Dr. Allan Meyer called Becomming a Valiant Man. He did his doctorate on male sexuality and goes right in to all this. It's run all around the world (by Careforce Lifekeys), and was amazingly helpful to me. He talks about a lot of stuff, but I found it helpful when I found out about the actual physical, long term effect of what I was doing, and that almost scared me enough to do something about it. It also gave some great tips on recovery and made me realise just how many people there are out there with the same issue. The group was run each term where I did it and there were about 30 men each time. Anyway, I still find it REALLY hard, but I believe it's worth the effort, even if it's a battle for life.

caged86

Dec 01, 2010

I have been reading this forum for two days and i find it very helpful for guys who have this ******* addiction but i have failed for the last two years.I am 17 but i feel this habit is very dangerous phsychologicaly.It is a fantasy land that so many of youths of today's generation live on and they forget what is ground hard reality.and i am not just against masterbation (masturbation) but also porn and sex before marriage.these acts are forbidden by the law of god and doctors will always talk crap.they dont realize the gravity of the situation of millions of people addicted to this disease.after reading all the comments i agree with just one person and that is casper.he is doing the hardest thiyng.abstaining from the three sins i just mentioned above.long and former-you guys are still hooked in the fantasy land but i have hope for both of you as you have abstained from one of the sins.as for me i have not watched porn for more than 1year and and have never had sex but i do watched some hot pics(not porn)recently and have become 'satanised' -i used this term because it is really satan who leers us into fantasy land.i am currently 6 days without masterbating (masturbating) and would be very happy if i cross 30 day mark.my highest run is 50 days.those were freedom days for me but it all came to an end when i sat next to very hot girl in my class.and my penis rose instantly and satan finally deceived me.from that point i lost my consistency and now i masturbate 3,4 times a week.but i am on a good run now and i dont want to lose it.AND TO LONG AND FORMER.you think you can escape the hell by doing what you are doing.my advice is change your way of thinking.satan is deceiving you.you cannot keep this 'controlled form of masturbation'.changing the way you think is the only way to keep away from the three big sins of mankind.miillions may be commiting these sins but you can start an example from today by abstaining and help others around you.soon you will see the world change around you.
i will provide with more information next time.and i also want to hear from casper-he is in top of the race.and i would like to answer former's question that he doesnot find evidence that a weekly masterbation (masturbation) is harmful.well my friend science may have not found the evidence but remember- religion is the father of science.masterbation (masturbation) on any time is very harmful whether it is weekly or yearly.i am not telling you to be perfect.just change the way you think and feel free to QUIT THIS ******* HABIT FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE.
Good luck !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

casper0_0

Dec 01, 2010

To: caged86

I don't know how I can help you as you seem to have a good grasp on the problem yourself, I wish I had your insight at your age. You are right doctors talk crap they promote masturbation as healthy and natural, what they fail to see is how it becomes ingrained in us as a habit that distances us males from real relationships.

You are right it is a fantasy land, it is an easy escape from reality but at the same time a waste of a life. Any how at least former addict is trying I will give him that. Myron seems to think the answer is watching porn with out masturbation. Yer I know its so silly its ridiculous. I scared him off this site I have seen him on other masturbation sites talking to whoever will listen about his penis. He seems obsessed with his thingy.

I'm not saying its easy or the answer to abstaining, It just seems to be working for me. I feel much better psychologically. It goes in pauses some times its easy some times its hard. I find my days off work the hardest. I think the bible says some ting about idle time. So I just keep myself busy. I like the way you say religion is the father of science I would have to agree.

caged86

Dec 02, 2010

To: casper0_0

ya you are right.myron is i think completely deceived by satan.by playing with his girlfriends in his luxurious mansion he is commiting a bigger sin.I wish he understands the harm he is doing on himself.anyway for me its 7 days without masterbating (masturbating).this is a very good run and i know i am just inches away from escaping the fantasy land.i have suffered enough depression by doing this habit.most of my friends are just blind.they have sex every night with their girlfriends and their pc is full with porn.and they keep telling me that i am only 17 and it is time to just enjoy.well i know better.i am 17 but my mind works like a 25 yr old. now i am on a mission that is difficult but not impossible.
by the way, just posting here gives me a lot of confidence.and thanks casper for your advice. i agree with you that idleness is the main demon. i just wanted to know how long it has been since you have masturbated?

casper0_0

Dec 02, 2010

To: caged86

I don't know how long its been since I stopped masturbating must be close to 4mths . I don't keep track anymore I did up to six weeks. Its just not part of my life style anymore. I'm not perfect I still lust and think impure thoughts some times. However I can control myself now and not revert to tossing the bacon. I guess I know from experience, trail and error, that even if you start touching yourself not planning to actually toss the bacon that one thing lends to another. So I don't touch it in the first place (except peeing and washing of course). Anyhow good luck you are doing fine and if you do fail don't beat yourself you are human just start again.

the_big_gorilla

Dec 02, 2010

To: caged86

Wow, we have a lot of things in common, but you seem to be stronger than I am, your 17 and have gone 7 days since you last masturbated, I'm 21, I usually go about 5-6 days without it, sometimes 7, it's not easy, but when I was 17, I'm sure it was probably daily throughout the year, unless I was camping or something like that. I'm sure you read in my previous post that I had sex with friends when I was only 4, which I never understood why an innocent child I was had to already have experienced, luckily this thought doesn't haunt me or bring pain that much anymore like it use too, I guess I've excepted more now then I did back when. I noticed that when I shut down my computer after 12 mid-night, the temptation is really there to look a porn, something I kind of failed at tonight, but I'm still not giving up, I think I broke too easy tonight. I've been reading books lately, that seems to be helping a whole lot, I already struggle sleeping at night, so instead of being on the computer, I read, right now I'm reading the Hobbit, but tonight I had a hard time concentrating on my reading, so instead I went on the computer, but at first I did go online, I was playing Final Fantasy 7 on my computer, which is fun fun and a great game, but I got tired of playing and decided to go online instead, and that when I made a wrong move, and I went on a site I found on google I never should have clicked on, but what can I say, what has been done has been done, and I just have to do better in the future, shut down my computer after 12, read and if I can't concentrate on that, maybe I'll have to try to find something else to do that has to do with not being on the computer and maybe play some Zelda on Nintendo or something. But I'm just trying to find distractions late at night I guess, if anybody has any ideas, I'd love to hear from anybody **hint, hint, telling me to just try to sleep ain't going to help, since that's something I struggle with and when I lay in bed it a lot of times lead to unwanted thoughts, which would probably get my to turn my computer back on just to get rid of the itch I get that I really want to scratch**.
caged, I totally agree with when you say that Satan kind of pulls you in, now I know that Satan knows my weakness and always temps me when he know I'm weakest, but then again, I can't blame him for my actions, sure, he's the cause of what got me tempted to choose that action, but he's not the one that chose for me to commit that action, that's all on me towards my own free-will (dough sometimes it seems and feels like it wasn't my will), and it's not easy at all, because I lose control of myself, and then it's hard for me to control my agency of not wanting to do it, but I keep on fighting, I may have lost many battles, but the war's not over, for I too have also won many battles, probably more then I've lost the last 3 months or so, something I guess I should be proud of and count that blessing of mine. But good luck with your addiction and battles, remember, you are not alone, if you trust in Jesus he will always be on your site, even when you do mess up, He still loves you and nothing can change that, I guess that's one of my many motivators for myself to help me fight my battles.

caged86

Dec 02, 2010

ok.you have developed a good habit- reading books.And that will be the key.when its exactly 12 you have to tell yourself that you should sleep.now the tricky part is if you can't sleep satan comes in and pulls you.but you should fight-tell yourself you have better things to do.if you lose then don't be too hard on yourself.try the same thing next day but go to sleep at 11.read 3 to 4 hours-that should clear all the impure thoughts and then go to sleep.if necessary use sleeping pills.this way if you sleep early this midnight masturbating thought will go away.But if you find this procedure too hard then a permanent solution that disconnect internet on your home.it's for your own good if you are too tempted.buy more books and games to keep yourself entertained.ocassionally visit cyber cafe but not too often. This is best procedure and soon you will forget about porn.I use net but i have no interest in porn or whatsoever.but i get tempted in my class because hot girls are increasing day by day.so remember satan can hit you anywhere,anytime in any place. so always remain on your guard.
and dont forget to post here the winning battles of everyday.this will give more confidence for you and me.GOOD LUCK

caged86

Dec 02, 2010

To: the_big_gorilla

oh sorry .the above comment is for you

the_big_gorilla

Dec 02, 2010

To: caged86

ok, I see what you're saying about sleep, maybe I should read for a long time before mid-night. Now I refuse to take sleeping pills, for they can be very harmful to the body, and I can't get rid of the internet, that won't work, I need it for career reasons and other things. I will try to keep posted as much as possible, I also just thought of something, coming here to this website page when I am tempted, I think that'll help. But I'm staying strong.

casper0_0

Dec 02, 2010

Yer good idea I wouldn't take sleeping pills maybe caged meant natural ones not prescription ones I once had a serious addiction to temazapam. Prescription sleeping pills are highly addictive.

the_big_gorilla

Dec 02, 2010

To: casper0_0

Sometimes I take melatonin, which is more to help you relax, and it only works sometimes and for it to work I have to drink Extra Sleepy Time Celestial Tea with it, but it doesn't always work.

caged86

Dec 02, 2010

To: the_big_gorilla

ok then sleep early.you dont have to take pills.make sure you are on bed everyday by 10:30 pm.that way you will probably be sleeping by 11 or 11:15.and also everyday is a hard working day so you wont have any loneliness.

Former_Addict

Dec 03, 2010

To: Everyone

Hello,

I'm still going on with the once a week masturbation habit and its been months of doing this. So far it's been okay, but it's been a slight improvement over daily masturbation, nothing dramatic to boost my energy. The benefits usually come by the end of the week. It appears my body has already gotten used to it and the cold weather is probably helping. I'm planning on switching to once a month of masturbation soon, but I am reluctant on quitting it altogether. I've heard that if you quit masturbating for a year and don't have sex, then your penis might stop functioning properly. This may not be true of course, and I hope it isn't. I'd like to hear some opinions backed up with evidence on this matter.

casper0_0

Dec 03, 2010

You should produce evidence supporting your claim before you expect anyone to waste thier time counter claiming it. You produce your bogus facts first you said it first.

Former_Addict

Dec 03, 2010

To: casper0_0

casper0_0, I'm asking for opinions not an argument. If you can't do that, please don't respond to my posts.

casper0_0

Dec 03, 2010

To: Fro

You said quote'. 'I'd like to hear some opinions backed up with evidence on this matter'

So therefore you are asking for opinions backed with evidence when you only offering a sweeping opinion with no evidence. I dont know why you expect anyone to waste thier time finding evidence when you cant be borthered backing your bogus claim up.Seems like you are still on your high hourse

casper0_0

Dec 03, 2010

To: Former_Addict (Tripper))

I suppsoe you my be able to figure out the above post was meant for you

Former_Addict

Dec 03, 2010

To: casper0_0

LOL I'm not on a high horse. I see your point casper0_0, since I don't have any evidence to back up my claim that quitting masturbating for a year will cause your man parts to stop working. To be fair where is your evidence that one should quit masturbating completely for the rest of their entire life if they want to live a normal happy life? I haven't seen it yet, can you please provide me with such evidence? :)

casper0_0

Dec 03, 2010

What a odd statement. I challenge you to find where I have made this ridiculous claim that a person should quit masturbation  completely for the rest of their entire life, if they want to live a normal life.??  Back your claim up.

I have made the choice for myself to stop masturbating as millions of men have  I personally believe that it courses all sorts of psychological problems the  main one being that it prohibits a person from forming normal relationships.  I don't have to back my claim up because  as I have said its a personal belief I have, although many other people have come on this site and agree from personal experience.

It seems to me that you are passing the buck. Like a spoiled  little brat you demand evidence from other people  when you never produce your own evidence just keep making sweeping mindless claims and never back them up, yet expect other people to.

Former_Addict

Dec 03, 2010

To: casper0_0

"What a odd statement. I challenge you to find where I have made this ridiculous claim that a person should quit masturbation  completely for the rest of their entire life, if they want to live a normal life.??  Back your claim up."

Well, I have made the claim frequently on this board that you don't need to quit masturbation completely and that once a week is fine.  You usually counteracted that by calling me an addict and that you need to quit it completely to be completely be cured and not an addict anymore.

"I have made the choice for myself to stop masturbating as millions of men have  I personally believe that it courses all sorts of psychological problems the  main one being that it prohibits a person from forming normal relationships.  I don't have to back my claim up because  as I have said its a personal belief I have, although many other people have come on this site and agree from personal experience."

I agree with you that masturbating every single day causes psychological problems such as prohibiting a person to form normal relationships.  It also makes you tired, lazy, depressed, which is likely a result of masturbation chemicals flooding your brain.  It also keeps testosterone and energy levels incredibly low hence you achieve little in life.

However, this is only from daily masturbation, if a person decides to masturbate weekly, every other week, monthly, wouldn't this negate the majority of the negative health consequences of masturbation?  I'm sure somebody could limit masturbation to once a year or never if they wanted, but what would be the point unless you want to have constant energy all the time, then that's fine, but it's not mandatory to do so.  If the person isn't able to have sex when they want, why would it be a bad idea to blow off steam once in a while.

"It seems to me that you are passing the buck. Like a spoiled  little brat you demand evidence from other people  when you never produce your own evidence just keep making sweeping mindless claims and never back them up, yet expect other people to."

I'm just saying casper0_0, that I am definitely convinced that frequent masturbation (more than once a week) is harmful to your psyche and well being in the long run as I experienced it for most of my life. However, I am not convinced that it is mandatory to quit masturbation for the rest of your life.  Sure, if someone wants to do it, I think that is fine and nothing bad probably won't happen, but is it necessary?

casper0_0, I just read that claim online randomly in a forum like this and wanted it to  proven wrong by you or anyone else because I wasn't sure if it was true or not, I did not make that claim and say this is right unless you provide evidence.  I think you are misinterpreting my motives, I am just trying to find out the truth that is all.

Hopeless29

Dec 03, 2010

To: casper & myron

both of u r amazing.. ur debates can be published.. but i din read ur cockfights after november 1, cos it s a very long thread, but i will find time to read all of ur comments tomoro maybe.. and definitely i will join u guys, cos now i gtg :).. but seriously i find it difficuilt to trace down the forum wher i shared a comment when i last logged in.. may be it takes time.. i joined on nov 30 here in this site.. this is wondeful.. meet u all guys with my story nextime , if u have time to listen :)

casper0_0

Dec 03, 2010

(F A )Well, I have made the claim frequently on this board that you don't need to quit masturbation completely and that once a week is fine.  You usually counteracted that by calling me an addict and that you need to quit it completely to be completely be cured and not an addict anymore.

I have never said that you or anyone else should quit competently.  I choose to stop masturbating, I don't have a clue if its completely or not. I take one day at a time. Its a choice I make and I share my choice and don't force it on anyone. All I say is that my general well being has improved.

(F A)However, this is only from daily masturbation, if a person decides to masturbate weekly, every other week, monthly, wouldn't this negate the majority of the negative health consequences of masturbation?  I'm sure somebody could limit masturbation to once a year or never if they wanted, but what would be the point unless you want to have constant energy all the time, then that's fine, but it's not mandatory to do so.  If the person isn't able to have sex when they want, why would it be a bad idea to blow off steam once in a while.

If a person wanks  daily, weekly , and  still leads a productive life, forming healthy relationships that's fine, I just debate (don't claim) that the psychological  problem's creep up and before you know it one has a problem. I personally  believe  that weekly  masturbation is to common,that is from my own experience because once a week is still enough to last until the next week (one fix to the next). Yes I liken it to a drug addiction, some people only take their fix once a week. It is still stopping a person from forming normal relationships. I have never said you should stop wanking once a week I just say what I do.

(F, A) I'm just saying casper0_0, that I am definitely convinced that frequent masturbation (more than once a week) is harmful to your psyche and well being in the long run as I experienced it for most of my life. However, I am not convinced that it is mandatory to quit masturbation for the rest of your life.  Sure, if someone wants to do it, I think that is fine and nothing bad probably won't happen, but is it necessary?

I'm quite sure that daily masturbation I  is more harmful than weekly masturbation. However I have never said I person should quit masturbation for the rest of their life and don't like words being put in my mouth.

(F A) casper0_0, I just read that claim online randomly in a forum like this and wanted it to  proven wrong by you or anyone else because I wasn't sure if it was true or not, I did not make that claim and say this is right unless you provide evidence.  I think you are misinterpreting my motives, I am just trying to find out the truth that is all.

Surly you don't expect anyone to waste their time trying to disapprove a ridiculous  claim that can't be proven one way or the other. I mean its common sense a person that hasn't had sex  for a year might be a bit shy at first and maybe it will take a while for them to get back into the swing of things. But to demand evidence  that some permanent  damage has been done  is just plain ridiculous . Do you expect their to be data from willing healthy males that have given up sex for a whole year. 'Come on'. Its a ridiculous  thing to ask a person to claim evidence on. Surly you can see that.

Former_Addict

Dec 03, 2010

To: casper0_0

"I have never said that you or anyone else should quit competently.  I choose to stop masturbating, I don't have a clue if its completely or not. I take one day at a time. Its a choice I make and I share my choice and don't force it on anyone. All I say is that my general well being has improved."

Fair enough, I commend your courage for partaking in such a task.  I don't think I can ever quit completely, but I do plan to cut down to once a month.  I noticed a lot of benefits in my one month trial, but after 30 days, the stress and sexual tension was too much for me, but maybe it isn't for you.

"If a person wanks  daily, weekly , and  still leads a productive life, forming healthy relationships that's fine, I just debate (don't claim) that the psychological  problem's creep up and before you know it one has a problem. I personally  believe  that weekly  masturbation is to common,that is from my own experience because once a week is still enough to last until the next week (one fix to the next). Yes I liken it to a drug addiction, some people only take their fix once a week. It is still stopping a person from forming normal relationships. I have never said you should stop wanking once a week I just say what I do."

I think in the end everyone is different, some people can masturbate every single day and not be phased.  Personally, I think there are a lot of guys out there that masturbate every single day that can improve their lives a lot simply by cutting down to once a week.  However, there are fewer guys that need to take it one step further such as myself and cut it down to once a month.  Then there are even less guys that need to take it even step further than that and try to quit completely such as yourself, everyone should take a different approach based on their sex drive, testosterone level and energy.

"I'm quite sure that daily masturbation I  is more harmful than weekly masturbation. However I have never said I person should quit masturbation for the rest of their life and don't like words being put in my mouth."

Fair enough, I guess I read wrong what you were trying to tell me.  It seems that your goal is to go without masturbation for as long as possible, that seems like a noble cause.

"Surly you don't expect anyone to waste their time trying to disapprove a ridiculous  claim that can't be proven one way or the other. I mean its common sense a person that hasn't had sex  for a year might be a bit shy at first and maybe it will take a while for them to get back into the swing of things. But to demand evidence  that some permanent  damage has been done  is just plain ridiculous . Do you expect their to be data from willing healthy males that have given up sex for a whole year. 'Come on'. Its a ridiculous  thing to ask a person to claim evidence on. Surly you can see that. "

I see your point and I'll abandon that claim, however a more realistic claim that has been bugging me is the question of prostate health.  How often should a man masturbate to maintain a healthy prostate?  Should it be once a week? once a month? once a year?  Or does it simply not matter because wet dreams will naturally take care of prostate health.  This is important to me because prostate cancer does run in my family, so it will be useful for me to know the answer to this.  If you don't know the answer to this, then that's fine, but maybe somebody else in this forum might know.

casper0_0

Dec 03, 2010

I'm not trying to pick you apart but who even says that a person has to masturbate (if not having sex) to maintain a healthy prostrate. I believe you mentioned this before. Sure there is data on it but nothing that can be proven factual. Theres also data saying that masturbation in itself causes prostrate cancer. I myself haven't had a wet dream since I was going through puberty I don't think most adults get them, but I may be mistaken. Maybe you should ask the online doctor in on this site about masturbation and prostate cancer. But then I would still demand hard data evidence before I believed anyone . I think its a myth.

Former_Addict

Dec 03, 2010

To: casper0_0

"I'm not trying to pick you apart but who even says that a person has to masturbate (if not having sex) to maintain a healthy prostrate. I believe you mentioned this before. Sure there is data on it but nothing that can be proven factual. Theres also data saying that masturbation in itself causes prostrate cancer. I myself haven't had a wet dream since I was going through puberty I don't think most adults get them, but I may be mistaken. Maybe you should ask the online doctor in on this site about masturbation and prostate cancer. But then I would still demand hard data evidence before I believed anyone . I think its a myth."

That's true, I've read about studies that state too much masturbation causes prostate cancer and frequent masturbation prevents prostate cancer and it's pretty contradictory the studies they have done. I think wet dreams happen to half of the guys if they stop masturbating and the other half won't get any wet dreams. I had my first wet dream in 10 years after I stopped masturbating for 30 days and haven't had one since. It may be a myth and a lot of doctors are making this claim that frequent masturbation equates to prostate cancer prevention or general prostate health, but I don't take what they say as fact. I just see this idea being thrown out when arguing for pro-masturbation, I just wish there were more studies done on this to draw a conclusion.

Myron_Long

Dec 03, 2010

To: casper

"Myron seems to think the answer is watching porn with out masturbation. Yer I know its so silly its ridiculous. I scared him off this site I have seen him on other masturbation sites talking to whoever will listen about his penis. He seems obsessed with his thingy. "

>>>>You did not scare me away! Somebody had to be the more mature person to end the going back n forth. So I left this forum to talk to more respectable people. I don't think watching porn without masturbation is the definite answer. I just think that proves an individual has self-control. Also, I think its easier to quit 1 habit at a time vs. 2. All of you is trying to stop masturbation and porn at the same time and I know that's tearing yall apart. Even though I still choose to watch porn, if I decide to stop, the urge to watch porn + masturbation will not haunt me. VS. one of you deciding to one day take a sneak peek at some porn and all of sudden you're masturbating again. I keep yall, YOU'RE DOOMED! Yes you're going months without porn and no masturbation but the self-control is gone once you go back to doing one or the other. Yall keep saying "How is Myron able to watch porn and no masturbation?" Yall act like it's something impossible. It's called mind over matter.By the way, my sex life is great! Well its better than before when I use to masturbate to porn. I get much better erections with women. So clearly porn was not my issue.

@caged86 "ya you are right.myron is i think completely deceived by satan.by playing with his girlfriends in his luxurious mansion he is commiting a bigger sin.I wish he understands the harm he is doing on himself.anyway for me its 7 days without masterbating (masturbating)."

>>>> I'm not even on this forum for a couple weeks and yall still mentioning my name. Yeah you right, Satan definitely got me on this one (watching porn). Oh freakin well! I'm not perfect and God already knows that. At least I manage to stop the masturbation habit. I just choose to watch porn as a habit I don't want to quit.However, I did go the last 3 days without watching porn so that shows I have some kind of control over the matter. But lets just see how long you run from Satan (watching porn and masturbation). And what do you mean by me playing with my girlfriends in luxurious mansion and committing a bigger sin? Let me make something clear here, SIN IS SIN, no such thing as a bigger sin.

casper0_0

Dec 03, 2010

Hey Myron I knew that would drag you out of the wood work. Why you so angry. We all miss you. Beer's on the house Myrons back.

I still find it hard to belive that you dont masterbate when watching all that porn. Why? because I'm allowed to.

Myron_Long

Dec 03, 2010

To: casper0_0

Well if thats the case, I think you're going to eventually take a sneak peek at porn and masturbate for old time sakes. Matter fact, you probably already did it and just not mentioning it on this forum.

Former_Addict

Dec 03, 2010

"Well if thats the case, I think you're going to eventually take a sneak peek at porn and masturbate for old time sakes. Matter fact, you probably already did it and just not mentioning it on this forum."

I haven't watched a porn film in about 6 and a half months. The reason I don't is because I simply masturbate once a week without it. It's definitely possible to quit watching porn as it is to quit masturbating. I think the real danger to a man mentally and spiritually is porn and masturbation combined, when you separate them, then the danger is much less noticeable. I go on the internet everyday and I rarely if ever have a temptation to watch porn and when I do, I simply wait until the week is over and masturbate without it, hence the problem is solved.

Myron_Long

Dec 03, 2010

What do you masturbate to or do you just use the mind? and let me ask you this... Suppose you masturbate today. Will you be okay to have sex that same night or the next day since you already satisfied yourself?

Former_Addict

Dec 03, 2010

"What do you masturbate to or do you just use the mind? and let me ask you this... Suppose you masturbate today. Will you be okay to have sex that same night or the next day since you already satisfied yourself?"

I just use my imagination and if I masturbated today I would be able to have sex tonight, but it would be pretty lackluster as opposed to waiting a week or longer.

Myron_Long

Dec 03, 2010

" just use my imagination and if I masturbated today I would be able to have sex tonight, but it would be pretty lackluster as opposed to waiting a week or longer. "

Okay, let me ask you this then...

1) If you don't use your mind, can you still reach ejaculation based on sensitivity of the penis alone? I ask that question because I remember when I was young, just touching my penis without thinking about anything would make me ejaculate. But as I got older, that sensitivity slowly dissapeared due to masturbating the penis head (desensitizing the penis head) for years.

2) What do yo mean by pretty lackluster? Does that mean you will have a hard time or longer time getting erection still?

flexiplan

Dec 03, 2010

"However, this is only from daily masturbation, if a person decides to masturbate weekly, every other week, monthly, wouldn't this negate the majority of the negative health consequences of masturbation?  I'm sure somebody could limit masturbation to once a year or never if they wanted, but what would be the point unless you want to have constant energy all the time, then that's fine, but it's not mandatory to do so.  If the person isn't able to have sex when they want, why would it be a bad idea to blow off steam once in a while."

Sounds to me, Former Addict, that you enjoy participating in the activity of masturbation quite a bit.  If daily masturbation didn't have any negative effects on you would you still do it that often?

Anyway, I think you're stuck in a rut with your weekly masturbation habit.  It's not something I'd keep doing.  I wouldn't suggest you limit yourself to once a month or once a fortnight or anything of that nature either.  Why?  Because it just increases your chances of suddenly saying 'screw it' and going on a binge.

So, what would I suggest you do?  I suggest you masturbate when you feel like it.  Obviously you enjoy it and have no moral/spiritual/religious qualms about it, so why not just take pleasure in a more free manner?  Of course you can still moderate yourself but not in the same mechanical routine of making a 'non-negotiable' date with yourself once a week.

The benefit of this approach is that you have a more flexible level of control over your stress levels by using masturbation as a form of stress relief, and also a higher degree of control over your energy levels by abstaining.  For instance, if you're feeling tired on a particular day for whatever reason you can choose not to wank that day in order not to deplete yourself, and if you feel like you've got too much energy you can wank to lower that energy and have some fun.  Also, if you find you always feel crap after wanking you can choose to, day by day, not wank and after a while you may find you have naturally gathered a long period of abstinence because, day by day, you have chosen not to get this 'negative effect'.

Anyway, it's up to you but this is probably how most people operate.  I think you like feeling proud of yourself for being able to limit yourself to once a week, but it's probably just so you feel like you're on the same level as guys who abstain completely as opposed to doing what's best for you.  I could be wrong but hopefully it's some food for thought. :)

Former_Addict

Dec 03, 2010

"1) If you don't use your mind, can you still reach ejaculation based on sensitivity of the penis alone? I ask that question because I remember when I was young, just touching my penis without thinking about anything would make me ejaculate. But as I got older, that sensitivity slowly dissapeared due to masturbating the penis head (desensitizing the penis head) for years."

Yeah I'm sure I can reach ejaculation based on sensitivity alone.  If I did it daily it would be harder, but definitely possible,  When I do it weekly, it just happens very easily, but I'm not circumcised so that could be the reason why, so my penis did not get desensitized after years of masturbating.  The only time I had this problem was when I masturbated to porn everyday and then tried to do it without porn.

"2) What do yo mean by pretty lackluster? Does that mean you will have a hard time or longer time getting erection still?"

In that the sex simply won't feel as good.  Getting an erection would be slightly harder, but not too much of a problem.

I have a friend that is circumcised like you and is claiming he has problems with sensitivity and he masturbates daily to porn.  I told him to quit porn and try to cut down on masturbation preferably to once a week max.  I could of told him to quit completely and just watch porn like you are doing, but I already know this isn't possible for him.

Former_Addict

Dec 03, 2010

To: flexiplan

"Sounds to me, Former Addict, that you enjoy participating in the activity of masturbation quite a bit.  If daily masturbation didn't have any negative effects on you would you still do it that often?"

The truth is I don't enjoy it that much anymore since I cut it down to once a week.  The only reason I do it that often is just to keep my stress and sexual tension under control, which can get high after about a week.

"Anyway, I think you're stuck in a rut with your weekly masturbation habit.  It's not something I'd keep doing.  I wouldn't suggest you limit yourself to once a month or once a fortnight or anything of that nature either.  Why?  Because it just increases your chances of suddenly saying 'screw it' and going on a binge."

I wouldn't say I'm stuck in a rut, since I purposely choose to do this.  I've doing the one a week experiment for months now, and the worst that's happened is that once in a while I may do it twice a week instead of once a week, but I've never gone on any binges.

"So, what would I suggest you do?  I suggest you masturbate when you feel like it.  Obviously you enjoy it and have no moral/spiritual/religious qualms about it, so why not just take pleasure in a more free manner?  Of course you can still moderate yourself but not in the same mechanical routine of making a 'non-negotiable' date with yourself once a week."

I see what you are trying to say.  If I did it in a more free manner, it's most likely I'd do it around two to three times a week on average because I find that there are two to three occasions (usually the morning) I have on a week where the need for sexual release is strong and I simply ignore it when that happens.

I find that at the morning my sexual drive is strong and at night it's weakened, which is normal as testosterone levels are high at the morning.  When I wait once a week and do it at the night when my sexual urge is weak, I'm releasing the tension unnaturally and don't feel as relieved, however, I feel much better relieved if I do it at the morning when the the sexual urge is strong.

"The benefit of this approach is that you have a more flexible level of control over your stress levels by using masturbation as a form of stress relief, and also a higher degree of control over your energy levels by abstaining.  For instance, if you're feeling tired on a particular day for whatever reason you can choose not to wank that day in order not to deplete yourself, and if you feel like you've got too much energy you can wank to lower that energy and have some fun.  Also, if you find you always feel crap after wanking you can choose to, day by day, not wank and after a while you may find you have naturally gathered a long period of abstinence because, day by day, you have chosen not to get this 'negative effect'."

I could give it a try, maybe I'll find out my natural frequency which I think would probably end up being 2 to 3 times a week if left to my own sexual drive, but if it was once every 10 days or so then that would be a pleasant surprise.  I'm just experimenting by doing it once a week,  I'll be willing to try to experiment to let my sexual drive dictate my sexual release, which with my estimate will be maximum 3 times a week and minimum once every two weeks.

"Anyway, it's up to you but this is probably how most people operate.  I think you like feeling proud of yourself for being able to limit yourself to once a week, but it's probably just so you feel like you're on the same level as guys who abstain completely as opposed to doing what's best for you.  I could be wrong but hopefully it's some food for thought. :)"

Well, I'm not really that proud for limiting just to once a week as it's not that difficult to do.  I just don't see what's wrong with letting out sexual tension and energy if it isn't being used, if I was able to have sex or pay for it whenever I wanted then I would have no need to masturbate.   The reason why I limit it to once a week is because I have read that testosterone levels peak at the 6th to 7th day at 200% your natural level,  I definitely notice this effect and it's useful when attracting women, playing sports or doing anything creative.

Myron_Long

Dec 03, 2010

"Well, I'm not really that proud for limiting just to once a week as it's not that difficult to do. I just don't see what's wrong with letting out sexual tension and energy if it isn't being used, if I was able to have sex or pay for it whenever I wanted then I would have no need to masturbate."

>>>> I agree.... I don't see no point in you quitting masturbation if this does not cause you any real sexual problems with a woman like can't get erection when it's time to, or can't maintain erection during sex, or can't reach ejaculation from a han job or blo job. If you're not experiencing these issues, masturbation is fine for you. In my case, I had all those issues so I had to leave my penis alone. My self pleasure was destroying my mental and stimulation. A woman CANNOT stroke my penis better than me.

Myron_Long

Dec 03, 2010

To: flexiplan

"So, what would I suggest you do? I suggest you masturbate when you feel like it. Obviously you enjoy it and have no moral/spiritual/religious qualms about it, so why not just take pleasure in a more free manner? Of course you can still moderate yourself but not in the same mechanical routine of making a 'non-negotiable' date with yourself once a week. "

>>>This what I been trying to say about porn. You're suggesting to masturbate in moderation. Why can't you watch porn with no masturbation in moderation too? That's what I do. I realize with watching porn, most likely you're getting a full erection from touching yourself. Take away the touching, you just have semi-hard penis that's throbbing. If you ask me, that's the time to practice flexin your pc muscles (exercise). Also, the time to build more self-control.

Former_Addict

Dec 03, 2010

"I agree.... I don't see no point in you quitting masturbation if this does not cause you any real sexual problems with a woman like can't get erection when it's time to, or can't maintain erection during sex, or can't reach ejaculation from a han job or blo job. If you're not experiencing these issues, masturbation is fine for you. In my case, I had all those issues so I had to leave my penis alone. My self pleasure was destroying my mental and stimulation. A woman CANNOT stroke my penis better than me."

Sensitivity issues only occured when masturbation was used in conjuction with porn. In its absence it causes no problems, but the reason I'm cutting down on masturbation is the same reason casper0_0 is cutting down and it's to have more energy, higher testosterone levels, more confidence, better social skills and higher level of creativity. I find the benefits usually become very apparent after about 15 days. I just choose 7 days because that's when the testosterone level peaks.

Myron_Long

Dec 03, 2010

Okay, that sounds good. I feel I'm experiencing all those too!

flexiplan

Dec 03, 2010

">>>This what I been trying to say about porn. You're suggesting to masturbate in moderation. Why can't you watch porn with no masturbation in moderation too? That's what I do. I realize with watching porn, most likely you're getting a full erection from touching yourself. Take away the touching, you just have semi-hard penis that's throbbing. If you ask me, that's the time to practice flexin your pc muscles (exercise). Also, the time to build more self-control. "

Huh, are you talking to me? I already watch porn with no masturbation in moderation. Been doing it for a few years now. Sometimes I slip-up and, mostly after watching, give it a pull - which I hate. But it doesn't happen that often. Just have to keep wary.

flexiplan

Dec 03, 2010

"I just don't see what's wrong with letting out sexual tension and energy if it isn't being used, if I was able to have sex or pay for it whenever I wanted then I would have no need to masturbate."

Being a dude who has payed / is still paying for sex extensively I would not recommend it to take the place of masturbation. Can I ask why you feel it would be better overall?

Myron_Long

Dec 03, 2010

To: flexiplan

oh okay...

Former_Addict

Dec 03, 2010

To: flexiplan

"Being a dude who has payed / is still paying for sex extensively I would not recommend it to take the place of masturbation. Can I ask why you feel it would be better overall?"

Well sex and porn addiction with masturbating are worse than masturbation without porn addiction in my opinion in terms of how damaging it can be. I have heard that sex once in a blue moon even if paid tends to give more positive chemicals to the brain as opposed to just masturbation with just gives you chemicals that leave you feeling blah because you're only doing it by yourself. Of course, i am talking about paid sex in moderation even if that means a few times a year. Sex with a girlfriend is much more meaningful and beneficial, while paid sex I would put it at the same level of a one night stand, which feels good, but probably leaves you feeling empty in the end.

Myron_Long

Dec 03, 2010

To: flexiplan

Part of the problem with you quitting prostitutes is the price you're paying to have sex with them (which was never discussed)... If you payin small amount dollars, I can see why its hard to quit your habit but if you're paying like $100 or more to sleep with these woman, that could help you to quit your habit. If you don't mind me asking, how much are we talking about here?

flexiplan

Dec 04, 2010

We're talking big dollars here Myron. A regular visit sets me back around 23.5 times what I usually pay to grab something for lunch each day.

Myron_Long

Dec 04, 2010

To: flexiplan

Dude I just came back from the stip club and there's this one girl that I'm stuck on. She is so beautiful and give me the greatest dances. But she only got $25 outta me ($5 per dance)... You are outta control with how much you are spending just to ease your sexual pleasures. This needs to come to a stop!

casper0_0

Dec 04, 2010

To: Myron

(Myron) Well if that's the case, I think you're going to eventually take a sneak peek at porn and masturbate for old time sakes. Matter fact, you probably already did it and just not mentioning it on this forum'

Yer I accidentally came across some more soft porn when cleaning out some old folders on the internet. Although it was soft, it knocked me for six. It was of two Asians women, I have a thing for Asians but I controlled the urge to flop it out.

I don't pretend to be perfect, I am human and if I fail I will start over again. However I think watching porn as commonly as what you do especially the hard core , sick porn, you have said you watch will course you, if it already hasn't, all sorts of Psychological problems.

It seems to me that you don't even reliase that you have a problem. You are quick to point out the problem of others without seeing your own. I tried pointing this out to you last time but you threw a hissy fit and went into hiding. Others have pointed this out to you however they are more diplomatic than me. I cant be bothered with all that whissy washy staff I say what I think and don't care.

Myron_Long

Dec 04, 2010

To: casper0_0

Hmmm, I have a problem? Didn't know I had one. I knew I had one with masturbation too much but I solved that problem. I'm heading onto 3 months no masturbation, so that can't be the problem. So what is my problem Casper? Is it watching porn? If this is your answer, not a problem to me because I choose to watch porn. I also don't look at any hardcore, sick, or any kind of porn close to that nature. I watch soft porn or amateur porn only.

Former_Addict

Dec 04, 2010

To: flexiplan

flexiplan: "We're talking big dollars here Myron.  A regular visit sets me back around 23.5 times what I usually pay to grab something for lunch each day."

It's clear that you need to use masturbation to end your sex addiction.  I know you might be against it, but your sex addiction is draining your time, resources and mental health so it's going to be the only way to end it.  When I was addicted to watching porn while masturbating, I had to first make the transition to masturbating using my mind.  I did it everyday and I know I wouldn't of been able to quit porn if I didn't do this.

The way I see it is masturbating is like opium and sex addiction or porn addiction is like heroin, both are very similar, but in the end heroin is significantly more addicting and devastating.  Just look at it is using nicotine gum to stay away from cigarettes until you can finally quit the nicotine hum.

As for the frequency of masturbation, you have already answered that question yourself:

flexiplan: "So, what would I suggest you do?  I suggest you masturbate when you feel like it.  Obviously you enjoy it and have no moral/spiritual/religious qualms about it, so why not just take pleasure in a more free manner?  Of course you can still moderate yourself but not in the same mechanical routine of making a 'non-negotiable' date with yourself once a week. "

Then once your sex addiction is finally out of your system and your brain reaches and equilibrium, this will probably around 3 to 6 months.  Then you can finally wean off the masturbation at your own pace until that addiction is gone as well.  Just masturbate when you have a strong feeling to spend large amounts of money on hookers, it will save you a lot of money in the long run and restore your mental health.

flexiplan

Dec 04, 2010

"It's clear that you need to use masturbation to end your sex addiction.  I know you might be against it, but your sex addiction is draining your time, resources and mental health so it's going to be the only way to end it.  When I was addicted to watching porn while masturbating, I had to first make the transition to masturbating using my mind.  I did it everyday and I know I wouldn't of been able to quit porn if I didn't do this."

Unfortuantely, I don't know about this.  Obviously the using the "One Habit to Conquer Another Habit" strategy worked for you in helping to give up porn, but in my case if I somehow used masturbation to my advantage I think it would only slightly help in giving up prostitutes, although I probably need all the help I can get.

Not surprisingly I have adopted this strategy in the past and in some instances I guess I can say it helped.

The thing is though is that I don't feel my sexual tension strongly these days.  As in, after ejaculating I don't feel a sense of relief.  In the past, my sexual urges used to take me over which made me wank or vist a brothel, and then afterwards I would feel that urge lift.  These days though I don't tend to have these 'swings'.  Instead I always seem to have a low undercurrent of the desire/need to have sex.

Yesterday I gave in and went to a brothel after getting nine clean days.  As often is the case I didn't even feel that horny and I know I would have been perfectly happy driving home without having an expensive interlude, but for some reason as I was driving home (even though I passed the turn off that would have taken me to the brothel the quickest)  I decided to turn back and casually 'go for it'.

It's kind of weird how I go on 'autopilot' and just sit back and watch myself do something I have commited to myself not to do anymore.  In my early days of the habit I used to have to spend lengthy periods thinking whether I really did want to go or not before I did actually go.  And then if I did go it would only be because I actually convinced myself to do so.

But anyway, as I said, I'm not entirely convinced that I need masturbation to help me overcome prostitutes.  Part of the problem being is that I like not-wanking a lot.  The other part being that I don't have a strong sense of uncontrollable sexual tension.

casper0_0

Dec 04, 2010

Hmm will seems you are changing your stories to suit, as you always do. In a previous post you were waffling on something about watching big booty women, large boob , older women , plus size women etc. You even said some where that even when you are doing normal stuff on the net you are always flicking back and forth between free porn sites. No I cant be bothered finding them and copying and pasting them I got better stuff to do. Its clear to me that you have a serious porn addiction. See the log of wood in your own eye before you point out sticks in others peoples.

casper0_0

Dec 04, 2010

(FA) The way I see it is masturbating is like opium and sex addiction or porn addiction is like heroin, both are very similar, but in the end heroin is significantly more addicting and devastating.  Just look at it is using nicotine gum to stay away from cigarettes until you can finally quit the nicotine hum.

Seems like you yourself admit that masturbation is like  drug addiction yet a couple of mths back you didn't like me comparing masturbation to a drug addiction,  I would disagree with your analogy only on the grounds that I think masturbation could be debated to be more liken to the heroin addiction. I say this because I believe that  lots more people need to masturbation than watch porn.
Any how I'm not being picky because at least you expressed it as a opinion

Personally I don't think masturbation is the answer to flexpans problem. Sexual relief is only part of the reason people visit prostitutes. Some times its just women  companionship. I myself would rather (not that I'm planning to) visit a prostitute once a mth than commonly masturbate over porn sites (not saying you do ) . Some prostitutes are very nice kind women nothing like these hard street ones you see in movies.

Myron_Long

Dec 04, 2010

To: casper0_0

"No I cant be bothered finding them and copying and pasting them I got better stuff to do. Its clear to me that you have a serious porn addiction. See the log of wood in your own eye before you point out sticks in others peoples. "

>>> Thank you for not taking the time to copy/paste and I hope you do have better stuff to do then to keep focusing on me, typing directly and indirectly about me when I'm not even on the forum for a couple weeks. Thank you!!

>>>And no I don't have an addiction. An addiction is when you're trying to quit a habit, whether it's considered bad or good, and you're having a hard time quitting it. I'm not trying to avoid watching porn like you. I like watching porn just like I like watching a great football game.

>>>And far as I'm concern, the only person really on here pointing out sticks to people is YOU!.

Do me a favor or do us a favor and disappear for a month without posting anything. Can you do that? Probably not but you just love coming on here talking down on people and making yourself seem so normal. I think you're MAD because you can't fathom the fact I can watch porn without masturbation. You on the other hand is trying the inevitable, never watching porn forever.

GOOD LUCK IN THAT!

casper0_0

Dec 04, 2010

WOW you sure get yourself worked up over nothin. That is the way I used to be when I watched porn all the time. I wasnt picking on you I was trying to get you tp step back and take a look at yourself, its not norma behaviour. I can see its impossible you are trapped in your little make belive fantasy world. At least people here including me can see they have or had problems. You can't be helped because you think your behaviour is normal, it's sad but i suppose, its the way it is.

Myron_Long

Dec 05, 2010

To: casper0_0

Porn is not affecting my life whatsoever. I'm not on the computer for hours looking at it. Nothing wrong with checking out some naked sexy women doing their thang on video. Not only it's exciting to watch, it's educational too. However, porn, to ones person desire, it does not have to be used as a masturbatory tool. Just because someone watch some porn doesn't mean it's time to pull out the penis and start stroking it. This is where maturity plays a role. Yes, porn does have me in a fantasy land when I watch it but I manage to not treat it as a fantasy, KUDOS to me!!! If I ever feel the need to stop watching porn I will do that. End of story.

Do me a favor and stop mentioning my name or anything about me directly or indirectly on this forum. You keep doing what you do and I keep doing what I do.

Former_Addict

Dec 05, 2010

To: flexiplan

flexiplan: "Unfortuantely, I don't know about this.  Obviously the using the "One Habit to Conquer Another Habit" strategy worked for you in helping to give up porn, but in my case if I somehow used masturbation to my advantage I think it would only slightly help in giving up prostitutes, although I probably need all the help I can get."

I say at least give it a try, if it doesn't work, then you can try something else, such as complete abstinence, but that might prove too difficult.

flexiplan: "It's kind of weird how I go on 'autopilot' and just sit back and watch myself do something I have commited to myself not to do anymore.  In my early days of the habit I used to have to spend lengthy periods thinking whether I really did want to go or not before I did actually go.  And then if I did go it would only be because I actually convinced myself to do so."

This is definite proof that you have a sex addiction.  It's ingrained in your subconscious mind. Your limbic system thinks it needs sex to survive, so you will develop cravings when you abstain from it for a long time and hence go on "auto pilot".  Maybe when this strong desire overwhelms you , you can simply masturbate and see if the craving is gone.  If not then, you'll have to take more drastic steps to overcome this addiction.

flexiplan: "But anyway, as I said, I'm not entirely convinced that I need masturbation to help me overcome prostitutes.  Part of the problem being is that I like not-wanking a lot.  The other part being that I don't have a strong sense of uncontrollable sexual tension."

If you masturbate when the craving develops and then the craving is gone after you do that then you can use masturbation to quit your sex addiction.  If it remains, then your sex addiction is embedded deep in your limbic system, and it's going to take a different approach to overcome this.

In my opinion, you should definitely inform yourself about sex addiction.  Research as many articles about sex addiction that describe the causes and how to overcome it.  Also watch videos on you tube that talk about sex addiction.  I think understanding what you are going through will really help you overcome this addiction.  Sex addiction is one of the toughest addictions to kick, so if you think you need help to get through this, then ask for it.

Former_Addict

Dec 05, 2010

To: casper0_0

"Seems like you yourself admit that masturbation is like  drug addiction yet a couple of mths back you didn't like me comparing masturbation to a drug addiction,  I would disagree with your analogy only on the grounds that I think masturbation could be debated to be more liken to the heroin addiction. I say this because I believe that  lots more people need to masturbation than watch porn.
Any how I'm not being picky because at least you expressed it as a opinion"

Well, I don't like to compare it to a drug addiction because it in my opinion it just isn't severe or devastating enough to someone's life as a drug addiction would be.  I compare masturbation without porn to opium because it can be addicting and give you pleasure, however it's relatively mild compared to heroin which is essentially opium but synthesized to be 1000 times more powerful than opium (I have heard, I could be wrong).  I like to compare masturbation with porn or sex to heroin for this reason because sex and masturbation with porn are significantly more gratifying and devastating to one's life than masturbation without porn in my opinion.  It's just a metaphor so take this with a grain of salt.

"Personally I don't think masturbation is the answer to flexpans problem. Sexual relief is only part of the reason people visit prostitutes. Some times its just women  companionship. I myself would rather (not that I'm planning to) visit a prostitute once a mth than commonly masturbate over porn sites (not saying you do ) . Some prostitutes are very nice kind women nothing like these hard street ones you see in movies."

Masturbation might be the answer to flexiplan's problem or it might not be.  I don't think he should replace his sex addiction with masturbating over porn as that is just swapping one problem for another even though he'll save a lot of money.  From what he has told me it appears that he doesn't visit prostitutes for either sexual relief or women companionship.  It seems that he's just very addicted and it's ingrained in his psyche to go have sex, if that's the case then he will need to get serious about having a full sex addiction recovery whether that means researching it and doing it himself or asking for help from those he trusts.

Former_Addict

Dec 05, 2010

"Porn is not affecting my life whatsoever. I'm not on the computer for hours looking at it. Nothing wrong with checking out some naked sexy women doing their thang on video. Not only it's exciting to watch, it's educational too. However, porn, to ones person desire, it does not have to be used as a masturbatory tool. Just because someone watch some porn doesn't mean it's time to pull out the penis and start stroking it. This is where maturity plays a role. Yes, porn does have me in a fantasy land when I watch it but I manage to not treat it as a fantasy, KUDOS to me!!! If I ever feel the need to stop watching porn I will do that. End of story"

In my opinion and from what I have read, watching porn without masturbating is nowhere near as pleasurable or damaging to one psyche than watching porn while masturbating. However, that doesn't mean it's doesn't have negative effects. I'm sure you get increased testosterone and a bit of an endorphin high when watching porn, which is normal because when you don't masturbate you spare yourself the long-term damage, but I think just watching can be addictive, but in the same way watching sports is addictive because you get that rush.

I think you should try to not watch porn for a week, if you can last that long, then you are probably not addicted, however if you can't last that long then it means you are most likely addicted and should either cut down on watching it or just abstain from it. It's not that hard to not watch porn, I've been on the internet almost everyday since I quit watching porn in the past 6 and a half months and not once did I give in and visit a porn site and watch a porn clip. It's all about mind over matter.

caged86

Dec 05, 2010

To: everyone

well i am on a fantastic run-9 days without masterbating (masturbating)!!!!.now only 3 weeks remain.seems like i have finally conquered the demon that has been giving me pain for the last two years.i still lust on women but i make sure i never touch my penis.no porn no masterbating (masturbating)-a complete addiction free life.unfortunately guys like myron and former still thinks sexual relief is an important part of life.they dont understand the disgrace and suffering this vile addiction brings that completely devastates an innocent teen's life.

Former_Addict

Dec 05, 2010

To: caged86

caged86: "well i am on a fantastic run-9 days without masterbating (masturbating) (masturbating)!!!!.now only 3 weeks remain.seems like i have finally conquered the demon that has been giving me pain for the last two years.i still lust on women but i make sure i never touch my penis.no porn no masterbating (masturbating) (masturbating)-a complete addiction free life.unfortunately guys like myron and former still thinks sexual relief is an important part of life.they dont  understand the disgrace and suffering this vile addiction brings that completely devastates an innocent teen's life."

You misunderstand what I was trying to convey in my posts.  I have successfully completed the 30 day trial of no masturbating and definitely felt much more energy and confidence.  I haven't watched porn in 6 and a half months now after being addicted to it for 2 years of masturbating daily to porn.  During those 2 years I suffered from much social anxiety, stress and pain.   So I understand the pain that you have gone through.

After I attempted to quit porn, I switched to daily masturbation without porn , I became incredibly depressed, developed acne despite the fact that I was recovering from my porn addiction.  It wasn't until I started exercising and meditating that I reversed these effects and fully recovered.

Now I have been masturbating once a week without any porn and definitely don't feel any of the negative effects that I did with daily masturbation and enjoy some of the positives such as increased energy and confidence, but obviously not as much as when I went one month without it.  I masturbate once a week without porn and feel fine mentally, but I will definitely switch to once a month or maybe even try to go without it as long as possible in the future when I deem it necessary.

You should read all of my posts from this forum caged86 rather than misinterpreting what I say based on a few posts.  If you think you can or need to quit masturbation for good after the 30 day trial of no masturbation, then kudos to you, I don't do it out of choice.  However if you wish to do it, then I commend you for this, but I recommend you meditate to control the pent up energy and exercise to release sexual tension.  Also Myron watches porn, but does not masturbate to it, I don't recommend it, but it's nowhere near as bad masturbating to porn.  The biggest danger to your health is masturbating while watching porn, if you masturbate without porn or watch porn without masturbating, it will have some negative effects, but nowhere near the level of masturbating with porn.

razor7

Dec 05, 2010

To: anyone

i need help i watch porn i cant control it anymore i tried to stop from masturbating those porn stuff keeps coming back to my mind and i start masturbating again i went for 3 weeks fine then i had in my mind i did it again i masturbated plz.. help (srry for bad grammar or spelling i have no time to correct those) i have been masturbating from 13 now im 16 oh plz HELP..

casper0_0

Dec 05, 2010

( Myron) Do me a favor and stop mentioning my name or anything about me directly or indirectly on this forum. You keep doing what you do and I keep doing what I do.

Ok Myron I'm sick of your story's as will. Now you are trying to back track and say you don't watch much porn. You always backtrack and change story's to suit when confronted. Other wise you run away and hide. Now you want me to not mention your name because you don't like me me exposing your tall storyies'. In the past you raved about all the sick porn you watched,now you trying to say you don't watch much and its only amateur stuff, ffs make up your mind. I'll talk to you if I like if you are to scared to respond to me fine its what I expect.

casper0_0

Dec 05, 2010