my boyfriend is a virgin im not havin some issue pllzzz help

[krayz_18]

ok so me and my boyfriend have been tryin to have sex for a couple weeks not but he keeps losing his erection fianally last nite he broke down and told be he was a virgin and was too ashamed to tell me well im not a virgin and ive been tryin to help him the best ways i know how. may i add he really really wants to have sex. now he able to get hard but as soon as he goed to insert it goes limp. he says his not nervous but i bag to differ he shakes and he heart beat a mile a min and sweats alot when it comes to intercourse even talkin about it he says he doesnt want to disappoint me but i no it wont,basically i need so advice to help him out like it kills me to see him like this he already cried which hasnt happened in 10 years i dont know what to do, i know he wants to be with me but we need to figure out how to keep it from going limp pllzzz help

[ryn21]

It definitely sounds like he is suffering from performance anxiety.  The key is he needs to relax.  He can take supplements to help him ease the anxiety or try taking viagra or cialis, which many doctors prescribe for PA.  The key is, he needs to learn to relax.  There are many sites on the net that can give tips for PA.  A quick google search of the topic would give you pages of results with treatment options.  Good luck.

[krayz_18]

thank u  is there ne way to deal wit this without viagra or pills becuz it cost money here and we dont really have the extra money like if need be i guess we could manage but i kinda wanted he first time to be drug free u know but i will do ne thing another thought that has crossed my mind could there be ne connection with the fact that he does drink regularly smokes and smokes pot?i realize some people become impotent from that but ive been with many men that have done harsure things in the past and never had a problem. i dont it just troubles me that all and i dont really understand i know he says he attracted to me and wants to but i cant help feeling that he isnt. we also recently on christmas eve became engaged and i wounder if that also worries him iam extremly confused and i just think to much i guess but is there also ne thing i can do to relax about the situation because like i said ive never had this problem before and dont know really how i may or may not be helpin and or making things worse

[RockRose]

Krayz -  why are you engaged to marry a man who can't have sex,  although you obviously would like to have sex with him.

He needs to go into counseling and figure out what this is he's dealing with - maybe he's even gay and trying to cover by getting married,  it's impossible to know over the internet what is causing his difficulty.

Best wishes.  This needs to be worked out LONG before you think about spending the rest of your life with him.

[pricej]

Remeber when you was a virgin? Your first time? Give him a break.

Try some foreplay. That should get him going.

[ryn21]

What is the matter with you?  Why would you assume the kid was gay?  Why would you put this in this girls head?  Dont be a damn fool!  The kid has some performance anxiety issues, which is common.

[scooterpdx]

ryn21 - The previous poster wasn't assuming the kid was gay. He was offering it as a possibility. She would be foolish to completely rule it out. In my teens, I made out with a lot of women and got erections, but whenever it developed into anything more serious, I got turned off. BTW - in case you have not figured it out. I am gay.

[MPV]

whoa! this rocks!!! its like watching jerry springer lol

But you cant just come out and say he mighht be gay or offer it as a possibility when you dont know the person! but if you are thinking about it now why dont you test the possibility?

Or, go together to councilling to try to figure out what you two are dealing with. Maybe it's Performance Anxiety, or maybe its Sexual dysfunction. Either way you cant just focus everything to oh no he must be gay. I myself fell inlove with my girlfriend when I was 17, when it was time to lose our virginity I couldnt do it, not that I cant, belive mee I can! I just loved her too much to go through with it, some weird  psychological problem. Maybe its what hes going through.. anyways good luck.

hope everything works out.