no sex with the girlfriend and its driving me nuts help

[anthonyw2433]

hello everyone if I could get your help on this I would be so grateful

I am 24 years old and my girlfriend is 28

I have been going out with my girlfriend now for two and half years, the first year and a half were great, we would have regular sex at least 3 times a week, I love her to pieces and think she is fantastic but something has gone wrong

in the last year she stopped taking the birth control pill as she said it makes her fat and she doesnt want to put on more weight than what she already is.

for some reason our sex life has died, we have gone from regular enjoyable sex to now once a month if I am lucky. she has no interest in sex what so ever, she doesnt seem to care at all for my needs as far as she is concerned she would rather just sleep.

sex is now on her terms only if and when I ever get it, if by the off chance she is in the mood then we can only ever do what sex possitions she wants.

I have talked to her about this problem and I only ever get one response "I dont know" she always gets moody when ever we talk about it, The longest time I have gone with out sex now with her is just under 2 months.

This is really starting to effect me alot, I am now horney all the time and craving some sexual attention, it is making me grumpy and most of all very depressed, I am struggling to focust on work because all I think about is sex.

She once told me that I expect sex to much and that normal couple do it once or twice a month is this true? am I want sex to much?

what can I do about my cravings for sex

I would be really grateful for some advice before I lose my mind.  

[anthonyw2433]

Thanks for the information Jim

if and when we have sex I always put her first, we kiss and I touch her body slowly, but alot of the time she doesnt want me even touching her yet alone kiss her.

I spoke to her last night regarding this issue again and discovered that she admits there is a problem she is never in the mood for sex or anything e.g. cuddles, kissing etc she will not go to a doctor or anyone else as she doesnt feel comfortable talking about her sex life to strangers.

[PromisedLand]

also, maybe spend sometime just exloring each other's bodies..without having sex..a couple of times...touch her in certain places and see what feels good and what doesn't for her and you...BUT NO INTERCOURSE....it could be your're not allowing her to really be prepared for sex and in such a hurry that she is not enjoying it at all..


Jim

[PromisedLand]

What you might want to do is both of you get out of the house, away from your usual location for sex and go for a walk and talk about it...or over a cup of coffee some place...try to find out what else is bothering her...are you too "rough"?  Are you using enough foreplay to get her excited and wanting sex or are you kissing a couple times and then "hopping" on..are you giving her the opportunity to achieve orgasm....even if you use your fingers and circle her clitorus gently and allow her to relax...

May be she needs to see a gyn and make sure everything internally is in working order or the 2 of you see a sex thereapist...

I would get a book or 2 on how to make love to woman...you might want to face the possibility that there are other problems in your relationship as well..


Jim