slept with wife friend

[jamesr]

This  weekend I slept with my wifes friend. I know its  wrong  ,we both do. We have an attactment to eachotherthat is unbreakable. I dont know if it will happen again. I know she wont tell anyone. She would lose alot . What I get from her emotionally is all I would ever need. we are 2 lost souls until we are together,(not sexually) I called my brotherlast night and told him,he knows our situations and my friend well and gave me hell over it,he doesnt think we can continue this without breaking our marriages apart making it too weird. i disagree. there are no expectations from each other only deep friendship. Any guys out there with help from a similar circumstance?

[Derek.Snow]

It amazes me how quickly women come out of the woodwork to condemn male infidelity and I wonder if you know the reasons behind both behaviors.  The feminist saying, "All men are dogs" contains a basic truth.  The male animal, including Homo Sapiens, is genetically programmed to continue his bloodline through mating, with as many healthy females as possible, to insure the continuation and improvement of his line.  In our civilized society we have chosen to attempt a rise above these genetic instructions and largely on the wishes of the "nest building" females, adhere to monogomy.

Perhaps it would work a little better if the females, once having secured their nest, would work against their genetic nature to pour all of their attention to home and kids and continue to allure their male partner and provide a continued supply of affection, friendship and sexuality beyond the child bearing urges.

I strongly believe that you women who are so fast to scream "cheat" "liar" "betrayal" and "dog" are guilty as much of pushing your mate off the path of monogamy as he is of straying.  Clean up your act before trying to storm the moral, man-made, high ground.

[Minx2006]

Y is is that most men think about only two things....sex and themselves. I ad my partner cheat on me with his best m8s slag of a girlfriend and you know what having someone cheat on you is the most worst thing ever, when you find out you feel like you have just had your heart ripped out and chucked straight back at you, you feel physically sick, you cry all the time and you become a nervous reck. also the only question you can ask the person who cheated is WHY and do you know what you wont beable to answer, because you will be hurt at the state your partner is in! did you think about this before you slept with your wifes friend. Your wifes well lucky aint she got a caring loving husband and she cudnt ask more from her m8 cus she, you both are idiots! you both havent thought about the concequences only thought about yourselves. you thought you were big enough to cheat now i think its time your big enough to confront your wife and tell her, be the man you wish you were before you cheated. Do one gud thing for your wife.....let her find out off you not someone else! Also you didnt mention anything about love with this other woman so all i can say is that it was just sex and nothing more. is that something to be proud of? No! i dont think so! in future think before you act because all the **** will *** bk to you. let us no what you decide to do!!

[complete]

Hi,I am talking to you from a males view.You will be divorce before long you can bet on it.All the ones that you say wont tell counting her they will!It always happens that way.You are not only hurting yourself but your wife and everyone that the two of you know.At some point she will have guilt and will need to get it off her chestyour wife, her friend, will be the first she tells.Then she will look wonderful and you will look like a nut case.The woman you slept with is as bad as you. You can bet your wife will get you back by sleeping with one of your friends!I hope you dont have kids cause you will also hurt them.My advise to you is to come straight and beg your wife to kept you.By confessing now it may save your marriage.Even if you dont come straight if will always worry you.If you decide not to fess up,then I would never have no more to do with your wifes friend!Kept your mouth shut,and find some forgiveness for yourself and some peace of mind and heart.This is the cowards way out,but in your case it may be best.I hope you learn a lesson and dont go there again.If you are not happy with your wife,then get a divorce and find what you are looking for.As for my self I would try to work it out and stay with her.The grass is not greener my friend on the other side,so stay where you are,and try to be happy and fall in love with your wife again if its not to late.Good luck.

[PammySue]

I'm just wondering, if it were your "friend's" husband having sex (just sex, nothing more other than close friendship) with your wife, how would that make you feel.  Perhaps you can answer your own question after giving that one some thought.

[star queen]

I noticed that you didn't mention "love" in connection with this woman.  You also mentioned that you are comfortable that she won't tell because she has "too much to lose". It sounds like you just want a "friend with perks".  This woman just makes you "feel good" and nothing else.  The excitement of doing something "wrong" and getting "emotional satisfaction" are driving this rather selfish "user" connection. These relationships usually go no where, but live only in the moment. Instead of spicing up your life with another woman, try spicing up your life with the Wife.  Most marriages go through stages where the "spice" is rather faded, and it needs to be kicked in the pants again. Maybe you could put your energies toward that instead of the disaster you are courting. That is, unless you really want to end the marriage.  Marriage is hard work, but the more you put into it, the better it is.  It takes both people to make it so, not just one.  You have stopped trying, so why is that?

[missie69]

Do you understand you could lose everything? If you do not love your wife anymore then get a divorce, if you do love your wife you should stop all contact with her.