Helen,
I am sorry to hear that you that you are experiencing difficulties in your sex life. Sexual desire and the ability to achieve orgasm depend on several factors, such as biological drive, adequate self-esteem, previous good sexual experiences, the availability of an appropriate partner, and a good relationship in nonsexual areas with a partner, to name a few. Damage to, or absence of, any of these factors may result in diminished desire or difficulty with achieving orgasm. Lack of sexual desire or anorgasmia can also be the result of medical/health problems, medications (including oral contraceptives), alcohol or drug abuse, chronic stress, anxiety, depression, etc. I urge you to discuss your concerns further with your physician/gynecologist, and to seek evaluation by a mental health professional if you are experiencing psychological/psychiatric difficulties.