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Mental Health (Expert Forum)
How can a parent continue to support if the child does not want too?
Questions posted in the Mental Health forum are being answered by Dr. Roger L. Gould, author of the Mastering Stress and Depression program and affiliated with the UCLA. Department of Psychiatry. Topics covered include anger, attention deficit disorder (ADD) , bipolar disorder , dementia , electroconvulsive therapy (ECT) , learning disabilities, memory, obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) , panic , personality disorders, phobias , post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) , schizophrenia , stress , transitions, and work problems.
How can a parent continue to support if the child does not want too?
by Elizabeth Jane, Nov 29, 1999 12:00AM
Dear Doctor, I have written before about my daughter's major depression and received your responses quickly..thank you! It has been 7 months since her discharge to us,her parents as her boyfriend did not think he could handle it...Of course, we wanted to help our daughter! this was not her first choice,of course! At first it was very scary as she talked to her voices and was afraid of people in the words but we got through this with the help of her doctors and meds...but then she decided to stop the meds except the zoloft as she did not feel she needed it and it made her feel funny!! Since then she has not been very responsive to us and is not progressing to wellness...but she insists that she is 25 and can do what she wants! Yes, but she is living here and we feel that she should at least be kind and respectful to a "degree" but without her other meds, she is hateful towards us and when she is not hateful, she is silent in her room. I have discussed this with her doctor but she is of age and I can not do much in this situation. It is becoming a hell on earth...maybe, we are not the BEST parents in the world but we care, love her and try to support her and help her in all ways including when she needs things...she is on ssi now and feels she can go to california to be with her "friend" as her friends are more loving, caring and respect her! There is not much I can do except go the mental health center and admit myself as she would like me to do...What can parents do to help an of-age child except to....perhaps, fall further down into depression themselves....? She does need to leave but I felt a group home would be best but she is determined to go to Calif.(she lives in Massachusetts) which a very long way away in she needs help..what can I do...what should I do...Elizabeth
Doctor's Answer
by HFHS-M.D.-H.G, Nov 30, 1999 12:00AM
Dear Ms. Jane,
I can understand your concern regarding your daughter’s decision. From the information that is provided, it seems like your daughter responded to the medications. If you can somehow convince her to take the medications, she may be able to think clearly. We can not force a mentally competent adult to go against his / her wish. She may need a comprehensive evaluation by a Mental Health Professional to determine her ability to take decisions. Placing her in a group home is one choice that you can consider. I would recommend that you discuss with her psychiatrist in detail about your concerns.
I can understand your concern regarding your daughter’s decision. From the information that is provided, it seems like your daughter responded to the medications. If you can somehow convince her to take the medications, she may be able to think clearly. We can not force a mentally competent adult to go against his / her wish. She may need a comprehensive evaluation by a Mental Health Professional to determine her ability to take decisions. Placing her in a group home is one choice that you can consider. I would recommend that you discuss with her psychiatrist in detail about your concerns.
