My condition has worsened

[HANNS]

I am sorry that I bring up a subject I asked earlier but I feel so helpless.  I submitted a question regarding my social and anticipatory anxiety regarding my upcoming wedding and what medications I should use.  I have tried these medications (Xanax, .25mg/ and Inderal 10 mg) in a "test run" and they do not seem to work.  Moreover, my conditioned has worsened over my fears of being in front of everyone and anticipating my wedding.  I have fallen into a deep depression.  I really feel that I will not be able to perform well that day.  My anxiety is now overwhelming my day to day activities.  I thought my 30mg/day Paxil would help but I continue to worry.  I continually have negative thinking and I feel very inadequate about my abilities/not being able to get married.

I have thought of many ways to improve.  Perhaps taking kava kava or hypnosis to stop my fears of anxiety.  My CBT is not working because when my psychologist uses a worse case scenario (a panic attack that stops the wedding) to help me overcome my fear, I start to worry that a panic attack on my wedding day may actually happen.  It is a continued downward spiral for me.  What should I do?  What other medications should I try?  How to I improve my outlook on life?  Do I need to raise my dosages?  I want to turn my life around.  My fiancee is getting frustrated with my behavior.  Thank you for your help.

[Roger Gould, M.D.]

You can do several things. As the wedding gets closer, the anxiety builds, so you can keep on increasing your dose of xanax,inderal( under your doctor's supervision) until you get to a steady state without being "drugged"

Another approach is to ask your therapist to switch approaches to take a dynamic/motivational conflict approach.  Try to get to the root of your fears.

A third approach is to take my masteringstress program (link above) and take the session on "transitions", and ask for a review by me, and I will try to help you get some quick insight into your fears.

[starr33]

I was the same way before I got married.  You have probably put a lot of planning and preparation into your wedding plans so that your day will be perfect.  You are going to be nervous and anxious there is no doubt about it.  You will most likely have a close family member or maybe even a wedding coordinator around to take care of "emergencies".  I really thought I was going to freak thinking about everyone looking at me...just try to remember to breathe and dont lock your knees when you are standing up front...also, another you can try to remember is that everyone is there for you and your husband to help celebrate your wonderful special day...everyone in the congregation is either a family member or friend of either you or your husband.  Our family members and friends love us for who we are.  I cried for a whole year before my wedding.  I know how you are feeling.  I believe everything will work out fine for you and you will end up having a beautiful day.  Guys dont really understand, what do they have to do really, other than get dressed...and show up.  Right?  It might also help if you talk with the clergy member that is going to perform the ceremony, maybe he/she could say a private prayer with you before the ceremony starts or something.

Congratulations on you big day!!!!  You will be fine.

[bumtummy]

Have you tried a higher dose of Xanax? .25 is pretty low, especially for intense anxiety. Also, you might ask your doctor for a "trial dose" of Valium, which might be less sedating. Kind of like what you get when you go for an MRI or something that induces an abnormally high level of anxiety. If you could find a dose that would work right just for that occassion, even though it might be higher than "typical", I think you might find that your fears would be much less knowing that you had the tools to manage the day when it came. I know it helps me with flying, that is always an especially anxious event for me, but I take a little extra Xanax, and do much better. Just knowing I have that magic little pill to get me through makes me less nervous ahead of time. Paxil actually made me more anxious. I recently took a yoga class, and it is wonderful for stress and relaxation. You can't help but to relax if it's done right. Think about finding an instructor that could give you a private lesson, even if it's just for the breathing. Since what is so distressing about anxiety is the physical symptoms, if you can find some tools to manage the symptoms, and there might be several that you use together, medication, breathing, etc., it will make it a lot easier. I remember my wedding, I was married in a Catholic ceremony, and opted just for the exchange of vows, not the whole Mass, I wanted it short and sweet. I knew so long as I got through the wedding part itself, the rest would be fine. As long as it was official, that was the important thing! What's the worst that could happen? You'll pass out and you'll get married in the emergency room instead! Just kidding! Keep up your sense of humor and talk to people that will help you laugh, it is a great stress reliever.

[HANNS]

Thanks for the responses.  Actually, I am the groom and I am experiencing these feelings.  I know my fiancee is usually the center of attention but I am so scared of that day.  She takes anxiety so much better than me.  I wish I could take a magic pill and get rid of my anxiety and just be confident.  I will ask for a higher prescription.  I also think my mind is controlling the matter.  IF you do not mind, it does not matter.  If you do mind, it matters!

[RUNNER55]

Hi,
I really think I can be of some help with this.  I got myself into a situation where I developed severe panic/anxiety.  I finally found the right doc who prescribed Klonipin.  This was a miracle drug for me at just .5 mgs.  That'll get you thru this.  And do not keep taking it,  as it is addictive.  But I do admit I take it before my dental appts but only .25 mgs, (this stuff is pretty potent, and I take the generic brand called clonazepam)  and it's miraculous!  Truly.  Just a feeling of calm.  NOt a eurphoria or anything like that.  Just calmness and much less nervousness and in complete control.  You will be just fine.  And the day will come and go so fast you will look back on all this worry and laugh. (although right now it's not so funny)  You truly will.  I've been there and know how you're feeling.
Good luck to you and best wishes.
R/55

[RUNNER55]

Sorry, but I forgot to add, I had tried Xanax when I was going thru my problems, but it did NOTHING for me, it actually made me feel worse.  The switch over to clonazepam did the trick. You really need to see a psychiatrist when it comes to matters of this sort.  Because the xanax was prescribed by my family doc, and the clonazepam was ordered by a psychiatrist.  It's their specialty and they know what they are doing more than a G.P.   And there's no waiting for time to pass before you can change medications.
R/55