What Now?

[Jeremiah1964]

What do you do if all the doctors said "I dont know"? Is there any doctor that is willing to atleast listen now and help, or give it there best shot?

[Roger Gould, M.D.]

I don't know how to answer this question because I don't know what you are referring too.

[Jaquta]

Usually there will be one who is a good-fit and is empathetic and concerned about your health and welfare.

Most of the mh professionals I've seen have put me and my issues in the 'too hard basket'.  My GP has been excellent and has persevered at trying to get me appropriate treatment.

In many respects he seems more qualified at dealing with people and mh issues than the specialists themselves.

You spoke about anxiety in a previous post.  Is anxiety the problem?
It must be difficult trying to find your feet when most of your life has been affected by anxiety.

Have you considered trying a different approach?
You spoke some encouraging words to us but I wonder if you're trying the white-knuckle the problem without addressing the issues.
I always thought that will-power or mental discipline would erase the problem.  It doesn't.  What I have found more effective is looking at and talking about the feelings.
It helps to have a good therapist too.

You could always try asking for a second opinion or an independent review.

I have found many doctors only to be interested in my past.  While I understand that can provide significant clues about my issues it can feel invalidating when you feel doctors just don't get it and so the past events just seem to build up without getting a feel for the real issue.  Nobody bothers to look at the issues that have been swept under the carpet.

Are you in therapy?  Given the right support things can change.

J

[Jeremiah1964]

Good reply, you didnt shoot of the hip Doctor; very impressed.... The issue at hand is a is racing thoughts about killing people in several different fashions, similar to the little boy on the other subject. The only problem with the current state that I am in is that I am finding my eye sight is changing to accomadate this issue. I have no problem caculating how far an object (person) is away with my eye sight.... Test after test i am usually the median error range is 2 feet, we have gone as far as 150 ft away.... I have always thought about killing people since i was eleven but it is no so far out of control i am scared in so many different ways at this point... I have been in therapy since i was 21 and I am now 23 and continue to struggle, i am sick of hitting dead ends and being put in a coma by doctors; i want my life back and am willing to do anything necessary to get it back. I could never kill or harm another at this point but do not want to be another statistic sitting in jail blaming my mental problems, i am a good person and plan on staying that way!!!

[Jaquta]

I understand what you mean (to some degree).
When I've been unwell I've thought about and felt compelled to harm/ kill others.
At times I've felt I could do this and it's not like I don't live in a prison anyway.
I'm the sort of person who is really sensitive about killing flies, etc.  Go figure.

I think the problem with some health professionals is that they see the issue is chronic and so therefore believe we are in control or can control it.

Most threats to life have origins in anger.
Did something that happened when you were 11 make you feel particularly angry or vulnerable?

Perhaps the type of therapy you're receiving isn't the type that would be most effective.
Do you discuss this and your feelings in therapy with your T?

If this feels out of control then perhaps some changes need to be made.
Are you on medication?

J

[zack32]

Have you tried writing down the thoughts in your head? What you wanted to do or how you wanted to react when the thoughts came in? Try it and go back and read it. Perhaps there are certain situations that make you want to kill a person. Try avoiding those circumstances in the future.
Also try seeing people in a different light. Not as I want to kill someone but how can I help that person? Or what can I do to make that person's day better? Sometimes the power of a kind word can be returned and make you feel better. Perhaps the good thoughts will out weigh the bad ones. I don't know just some thoughts as I am not a Doctor. I hope that you can find the answers you need and find some peace. Reading the Bible can help greatly as well.

[Jaquta]

I was hoping the doctor would read the second part of your post and respond.

On reflection I think some of those thoughts become automatic because we are in that head space or become accustomed to thinking negative thoughts.
I think I became less obsessed about killing myself or others when in good therapy.

When in therapy you can also address the things that are really bothering you and driving those thoughts and feelings in the first place.

I am also replying to this post tonight because I feel you have not had your question answered (although perhaps if the material had of been disclosed to start with it may have been) and in some small way I feel you have been rejected (as well as the individual who had his question relocated).  These in my opinion, are also very important mental health questions and should not be ignored.

J