I know a lot about your condition, and I can tell you it is not uncommon to have this kind of depression, and it is very important that you seek counseling about it. You can save yourself a lot of worry and cut the depression short with some help. The risk in not getting help is that it goes on too long and feeds on itself. You want to avoid that.
YOu are on medications but it doesn't sound like you are talking to anybody.I would encourage you to do that.