there are a number of questions here. I am not sure, but are you suggesting giving birth control pills to a twelve year old who is just starting puberty? Are there special circumstances here to take into account, but if not, that would not usually be recommended. Birth controls do not affect hyperactivity. As long as your daughter is off her hyperactivity medicine, and doing okay, you should just watch and wait, and if she has outgrown the need for it, don't listen to grandma.