Basilar / Hemiplegic Migraine Symptoms help

I was diagnosed with basilar migraine 10+ years ago.  lost my neurologist as he retired and i became a full time student.  recently, my symptoms have spiked.  here they are in order of intensity:  

RIGHT SIDE PARALYSIS (eye completely closed, mouth drooped and yes, i drool, inability to walk or use the bathroom without assistance, numbness in right side of face particularly ear and throat, right arm drawn in hard, head tiled hard to the right and cannot lift without assistance, right side of body spasms causing to be drawn in on itself on the right side),
VERTIGO,
DISORIENTATION,
CONFUSION,
SLURRED SPEECH (I understand people and know what i want to say, just can't make the words come out), people say I "space out" and don't respond at all for a 20-30 seconds.  

These symptoms can be aborted with benadryl / composine / ativan / magnesium sulfate cocktail but then I'm out for the day.  The following days will be filled with a "rumbling" of symptoms ALWAYS strongest when I wake up by a long shot.  I usually do not sleep through the night and my sleep is filled with nightmares of varying degrees of intensity.  Sometimes terrifying.  If it is terrifying, the bad symptoms follow and I wake up with it. This has been going on for two weeks (since Sunday, November 7th, 2010) with three "spikes" of the paralysis, progressively worse each time with periods inbetween wherein my speech never fully returns (and I never fully return) to normal.

To say this is frightening is a profound understatement.  I call it the Great Pussifier.  Normally, I am a hardcore single mom, the Lifetime Network makes me wanna vomit.  I am hard, stubborn, prideful, and the like.  This?  Well, it turns me into a fearful, terrified, pile of something that would cut off her own limb to make it stop.

I have been swallowing magnezium citrate 3x a day and I firmly believe it is helping.  Admittedly, I don't want to take the Ativan script they gave me because I'm tired of feeling "altered."  I have to run a cost/benefit analysis on everything I put into my body these days.

Does anyone else suffer from hemiplegic migraines/basilar migraines?  I will be starting a VERAPAMIL regimine in a few weeks (I'm waiting til the current school semester ends and I can afford to be knocked out for a few weeks.)  Besides, I know it won't get rid of the symptoms, it only prevents.

Any other recommendations would be appreciated more than my words can express.

Much love.

Kerry

[skadeetin]

oh,  I forgot to add:   I AM NEVER IN ANY PAIN.  I would really like to make the point that just because one is not in physical pain does not mean one is not suffering and welcoming the thought of being hit by a semi just so it will end.  sorry for the drama.  but it is so true.