Miscarriage depression

After TTC for four years, we finally decided to get help from the doctor and started our first round of Clomid, After only one round on April 10th we got our first positive pregnancy test! We were both extremely excited and could hardly contain our happiness. I went to the doctor a week later where they tested my hcg levels; my doctor told me I must have JUST got pregnant literally because of my low hcg level of only 23. I went back again 2 days later, only 29. I did not give up hope, finally my hcg levels started doubling and it was like a huge wave of relief! My husband and I finally figured this pregnancy was looking up and we were going to have a healthy baby finally. We got our first ultrasound order in the mail for May 7th. We were so happy and excited to see how our little baby was growing...Well I started having dark brown spotting...my doctor reassured me brown spotting is totally normal in early pregnancy. I felt in my heart it was a bigger problem, sure enough 2 days later I woke up to a bloody mess and was rushed to the hospital. After about a thousand tests were done and I was done being poked and prodded they told me that I was miscarrying and explained things to me...I am so depressed right now, and I just don't know how I am going to handle this..It doesnt seem fair to me. I was only about 6 weeks along so I dont understand why I am so sad and grieving this much, but it is the worst feeling I have ever felt... I feel so empty...

[Chreey]

It is normal to grieve. The baby was only 6wks but still it was YOUR baby and it took so long to get to that point. I to went through similiar ordeal. I was on the depo shot and went off to try to concieve (conceive) and it took me a year and a half to finally get preggo with my daughter. But before i got preggo with her 3mos prior i had gotten preggo using clomid and had a missed miscarriage. I had 3 ultrasounds and they all kept saying baby was smaller then what was supposed to be. I ended up having to have a dnc then got a pelvic infection 8 hr later ended up back in er came home after that and ended up back in er next day with phneumonia. I was in the hospital for a total of a month with the ordeal. Missed my sons birthday and everything. I figured the clomid forced my body to produce an egg that just wasn't ready. Cause i had already had one child and since the miscarriage have had 3 more. My last child i thought i was going to miscarry cause i had a period and it was alot heavier then normal i took a test was a faint positive but had more blood then urine the docs told me to prepare for the worst. Its an unfull feeling. I don't know how to tell you to handle it. But what i did was gave her a name because at that far along if it was a boy its little wee wee wouldn't of been devolped. I also every year put and ornament on the tree that says little angel for her. I came up with name tracy since it could be for either gender. My prayers are with you that god sees you through this. But just know that you arent along even if it feels like it at times.

[lilbit0922]

It's normal to feel like that, I just lost my baby last week and I was 10 weeks. I was hurt and depressed but it will get better. I felt the same way! I just have to try again!!

[Ellenhall85]

Sorry for your loss.. its Normal to feel empty , your prob questioning why it happened and was it your fault which is exactly what I did. And its normal to go through it. I cried all the time the week after I miscarried and its important to grieve. Although the baby stopped developing at 8.5 weeks to me I was twelve weeks and that was my baby and still is. I will light a candle in.rememberance on its due date. Three weeks ago today my nightmare started with the spotting and also two weeks today I passed my baby :( it has got easier as the days have gone by but its important you grieve to start with. I'm now ready to start trying again. I'll never forgot this baby. Miscarriages are common and just because you've had one it doesnt increase your chances of having another. Your chances will be the same as everyone else .... Most women go on to having another baby full term.

[summero87]

My condolences to you an your family ..I had a beautiful healthy daughter in 2005 in 06 i got pregnant again had our first scan everything was wonderful an healthy ..about 2 weeks after that appointment I started to lightly bleed I was almost 15 weeks ..after an ultrasound they confirmed the baby was deceased I had a dnc an the whole bit ..I was absolutely devastated ..I had a child already but nothing takes away the pain of losing one ..no matter how far u were it was yours it was in your body an you had thoughts an ideas about what the baby is gonna look like do in his or her life etc ..u have the right to feel like that ..a lot of people would tell me at least u didn't have the baby an then find out it had problems or its good u miscarried early ...none of that made me feel better at all ..time heals this more than anything ..I hope the best for you an your family an getting through this ..best wishes for having a healthy baby in the near future as well ..

[lulu0282]

Same thing happened to me...we TTC for 2 1/2 years....got help from a specialist and FINALLY got pregnant.  At my 8 week checkup I went in and saw that the heartbeat had stopped.  It was AWFUL!! We had tried for so long and were SOO excited. I felt so empty and after a D&C was done I was just angry about the whole thing.  For weeks afterwards I spent every spare second on the internet finding out how fast people got pregnant after a miscarriage, when it was said to be safe to start trying, etc.

Well....6 weeks after my miscarriage (only had one cycle) I found out I was pregnant again.  My husband and I were SOO nervous and did not even start to get excited till the first trimester was over.  I now have a healthy and happy two year old son.  

It's horrible when you are going through it but luckily you know now that clomid works for you.  Nothing anyone can say makes it easier...it just ***** all together.  I still get upset when someone has one and talks to me about it....brings back the pain of mine.

Good luck to you on getting pregnant again (if that's what you want).  God bless!!