Miscarriage number 2

[TesW]

Hi everyone,

I just joined this community and wanted to say hi. I just experienced my second non-consecutive miscarriage on this past Saturday. I was nine weeks, and six days. We had had a viable fetus with a heartbeat two weeks prior. So that puts me in the less than 5% of pregnancies that miscarry after there is a heartbeat. I am at a loss for words.... I just wanted to say hi to everyone. I had such great support on the pregnancy community, I am hoping to find that here.

[wakejl]

So sorry for your loss. I just had my 2nd consecutive miscarriage. My DH and I are blessed with a 5-year-old DD. We would love to complete our family and give her a sibling.
I also was in that 5-10% group of pregnancies where the heartbeat is seen (at 7 weeks for us), and then stops (9 weeks for us). It's so hard to let go of your dreams for your baby, especially when you know that it was alive.

[keene]

Hello..I joined this website last month after my 2nd m/c.  After reading all of your comments and the positive words that you have given eachother it made me feel better.  Its been a rollercoaster ride of getting pregnant and then the scared feeling that something is going to go wrong since I had already had 1 m/c.  My first m/c was at 10 1/2 wks and I had to have a dnc.  I got pregnant 2 months later and m/c at 6 weeks.  I was devastated.  However, my doctor did mention something about my progesterone level being low but she was not 100% sure if that was the cause.  Does anyone know anything about progesterone and how to increase it during the early weeks in pregnancy?   I'm going to give myself some time to heal and try again in a couple of months.  Hopefully the 3rd time is the charm:)

[Gracie0717]

I am sorry for all your losses. You are right, Tesw. So many people have commented that I will definitely have other babies in the future since I am young (26). But I wanted this baby. It has been growing inside me. Sometimes I do wish they will just say nothing at all.

I m/c at 10 weeks after hearing the baby's hb at week 8. It was so unfair. I have been depressed after that. Being in this community does help because everyone here truly understand how it feels and I feel as if I am not alone. Thank you all for sharing your stories.

We are going to ttc after 2 months but I am very afraid it will happen again. Nothing anyone said will be able to comfort me but I am just going to take very good care of my body now and let things be.

Cheers,
Grace

[Mel1126]

Hello - I'm new to this website and have been addicted to reading everyone's comments.  I too have experience multiple m/c.  May 14th was my 3rd one.  We went in at 6 weeks for our first u/s and saw the flutter of the heartbeat.  I almost started to cry because our 1st pg we had a tubal and a uterine at the same time and the uterine wasn't viable.  I had the methotrexate shot for the tubal.  On Mother's Day 2010 I started bleeding and the doctor stated it was most likely because we had intercourse so I went with it.  The bleeding continued for a few days and I had another u/s on 5/13/10 and the technician stated she had concerns.  My doctor was called in and told me that we no longer have a heartbeat.  I was devastated!  My husband and I want a baby so badly.  I'll be 42 this year and keep thinking I hope it happens soon.  I talked to my doctor because we've been trying for so long and we only seem to get prego in March and April.  She had no answer for that and thought it was really odd.  We've done everything besides IVF and will not do that.

The doctors have stated they do not know why we continue to m/c as both my husband and I are good to go with all of the tests that have been done.

I hope a baby is part of God's plan for my husband and I as I do not feel complete.  My thoughts and prayers are with all of you that have experienced this horrible loss.

God Bless

[mh814]

The women here are great. They are all so supportive. I myself had just joined after finding out on Monday that my baby that had a heartbeat at 5wks5days did not at what should have been around 8wks. I had a d&c yesterday. I can understand your pain and frustrations. I take comfort in knowing that God didnt want to give me a child that was not perfect that is why he took this one from me. It doesnt make the process any easier, but sometimes gives me some reassurance. Im hear if you need to talk, vent, or if nothing else a shoulder to cry on. I have gained emense strength knowing that these women have suffered losses and keep going until they reach the goal and outcome that they want. It seems that for me unless I can make some light out of this situation then my saddness was wasted, that is why I am here. If you need anything, Im here to talk.

[ascott]

There is nothing anyone can say to make things seem fair. Our words will only help you have inspiration to move forward. It is nice to know there are so many other women who understand the pressure and depression that comes along with fertility problems. I myself have experienced 7 m/c. Let me tell you it does not get any better. My personal experience is I have become numb to the whole experience. The women here are great!!! They really make you feel welcome. Push forward, but don't let it consume your life. Do you have any children?

[nina2249]

I'm so sorry for your loss. I too know how you feel I had my first miscarriage December 28th . I started spotting on the 13th and was light then stopped. I went in for a sono on a Mon. The nurse said i don't see a heartbeat. I was like what. I knew i was early but they said my sac wasn't measuring the right weeks. I immediately started to cry and think the worst. The Dr comes in and says lets give it a week and come back. well i didn't make it a week so i was back in there on Fri at a different location and there it was a baby heartbeat. I was so mad they gave me that news on Monday and i cried til Friday. I was like they made me waist all this time freaking out for nothing. That was the best news ever. well when i left there on Friday that night I started to see bright blood then it went away. Sunday i was in bed all day with light cramps and lower back pains that wouldn't lighten up. I called the Dr she told me to take some Advil. They don't recommend it but using it once won't hurt the baby. I laid around for another hour in a half and was like let me get up cause it wasn't letting up . I stood up and it felt like my water broke. Got to the hospital for them to confirm the miscarriage. I was so devastated Its been a week and I'm so not wanting to be around people, talk to people. I truly know how you feel and my heart goes out to you. I don't know when we will feel better or what the future holds but I'm glad I have this place to come to and vent and talk to other women that have been there or may not have been through  it but they all have this women hood pack here to help get us  to the next chapter of our lives. So thanks to everyone on here.

[mapes10]

Welcome to our community, though I am sorry you have to find us.  As you have heard, everyone here is amazingly supportive, and we have all been carried through our difficult times.  We have become friends with people we have never (and may never) meet.  I had a mc this summer after hearing the heartbeat, and it was devastating.  I had bleeding in my first pregnancy and had a healthy son.  The next time it was a very similar situation with bleeding, and we ended up losing that baby.  No one prepared me for the roller coaster of emotions that would follow, and after a week or so it seemed like no one remembered that we had lost our child.  It was heart breaking, but I can definitely say it does get better.  My sister and I were due within about 2 weeks of each other, and she is scheduled to deliver Feb 4.  It still hurts, but the ladies here are helped tremendously.  Feel free to post anytime, and again welcome.

[TesW]

I know what you mean. My doctor kept saying the m/c doesn't mean you can't have another healthy pregnancy and you should think about trying again in three months. I just thought "I wanted THIS baby"

With this being my second m/c I have heard my fair share of misguided support.....like, "well you can have more, your so young". This time around they are far less hurtful than the first time. You are right about sometimes you just wish they would say nothing.

[mikaleen]

I am sorry for your loss.  I was told something similar about my ovaries and all I could think was yeah, but I want THIS baby.  I think sometimes they say dumb things because they feel they need to say something.  Sometimes it's better to say nothing.  I know of a lot of women who have had bleeding during pregnancy and had things turn out ok, but my Dr. told me that bleeding during pregnancy is not normal, it's always a sign something is wrong.  Not necessarily with the fetus but maybe hormone levels, a subchorionic hemmorhage or even a blighted twin.  Bleeding for me has never been good, always a m/c.  There are a lot of women on here who have bleeding and it has been due to some other cause and have healthy pregnancies.  It's a rough road and it's nice to have women to share your grief with who understand.   I wish you a fast recovery and again, I'm sorry you have to go through this.

[TesW]

Thank you so much for the kind words. It is so nice to hear responses from people who have been through similar situations. Someone had asked if we knew what caused it, and we don't but here is the situation of what happened:

I started bleeding at week 6. The doctor prepared me, saying that I had could possibly have miscarried. However the ultrasound revealed a perfect little bean, with a strong heartbeat, and no origin of the bleeding. My HGC was rising but not doubling. But a second ultrasound four days later showed our little guy had grown appropriately, and his heart was still beating strong. My doctor than told me he felt confidently that I was out of the woods. Then one day before my next scheduled ultrasound I started bleeding heavily.  I was told by an ultrasound tech. with no bedside manner that "see that is where your baby should be and there is no baby....but you have beautiful ovaries and you could make lots of babies".....It was so terrible my husband and I were able to laugh a little bit in the midst of our sadness.

Thank you so much for letting me share and vent my experience. It is nice to have someone to talk to. I can hardly look my family and friends in the face with out wanting to run to my room and cry. Thank you for listening.

[YogaChick]

Welcome... although I'm sorry you have reason to be here.  Fortunately it's a great group of women who will do an amazing job helping you get back on your feet again!  I can't imagine a m/c at 9 weeks-- that must have been really difficult & shocking.  My m/c was at 7-ish weeks.  I've blocked a lot of the details but we saw a heartbeat and "severe uterine hemorrhaging" on the u/s so they put me on bed rest which seemed to have stopped the bleeding... leading me to think everything was okay but when we went back a week later there was no hb.  

This is definitely a difficult time but I found that the shock does soften bit by bit so hang in there and give a shout if you need some support.  

[smr08]

Hi and welcome. I'm so sorry for your loss. I joined this forum after the loss of my son in Oct., I was almost 5 months, I delivered him and got to hold him, but not nearly long enough. Being here has helped me so much. Even if you don't have a question you just might have an answer that someone needs or an ear for someone to vent to or a shoulder to cry on. Whatever the case you have come to the right place, the women here are great! I hope you feel well soon. Take care of yourself and if you ever need to talk I'm here.

                           Lori

[Popcorn799]

As you can see from all these posts you are more than welcome here. I am sorry you had to join this community, but you have also come to the right place to help rehabilitate yourself. I had a m/c in November at 11w5d, the baby was only showing 7weeks. I never got the chance to hear or see anything that seemed like a baby, so I'm sure that would be more devastating. Hang in there and ask as many questions as you'd like Take Care.

[dramababy]

i am so sorry for your loss. It doesnt seem fair does it? But remember your baby is in heaven and one day God wil fill your loss ok? did they find a reason this baby didnt make it? have you thought of invetro? im here if you need to talk...-laura :)

[EricaB28]

Welcome to the forum. I am so sorry for your losses. The women on here are fantastic, I don't think I could have gotten through such a tough period without them. I m/c at 6 weeks naturally and am currently ttc again. (Although we are taking this month off to move to our new house) Feel free to leave me a note if you ever need to talk. Like I said the women here are great, you've come to the right spot for great support. I wish you a speedy recovery, you will be in my thoughts and prayers. Erica :)

[ArmyPrincess819]

I'm sorry for your loss. Welcome to the miscarriage community! I suffered 6 m/cs and one I actually had to have a d and c at 19 wks. It's very hard once you see the heartbeat. Very painful and very very sad. I found this website in sept when I was on a rollercoaster ride of being told I'm having a m/c to everything is fine. I ended up losing the baby. I needed to come to a place and hear other women speak of their experiences so I could understand that I'm not the only one. This is a very close and friendly forum. The women on here are very supportive and will always lend a listening ear. I wish you the best of luck and I hope you have a nice and quick recovery!!!!

AP

[Latrice414]

Welcome to the forum, the women on here are gr8.

I am so sorry for your loss, i will keep you in my prayers, there are no words of comfort that one could really say bcuz a m/c is a very devastating.

I had a missed m/c at 10weeks 3days, my first appointment didnt consist of hearing a heartbeat or getting an u/s it was scheduled for my 12th week.

I have beet ttc since august, and now have found myself on zoloft bcuz of depression(this was my first m/c)

[kc1021]

So sorry for your 2nd loss.  I miscarried earlier than you did so I didn't ever get to see or hear the heartbeat, but I imagine the loss is much more compounded after already having a positive ultrasound.  

The good news for you is that this miscarriage was not consecutive to your last, so the chances for a future healthy pregnancy are great. I am 11 weeks pregnant after having a miscarriage in in Oct and it still hasn't really sunk in that I'm pregnant again.  Of course I am thankful that so far everything is going well, I guess it will just take time to feel comfortable that everything will be okay.  

Everyone on the forum has similar struggles and feels your pain, so feel free to vent or talk whenever you want!

[bam1014]

Welcome to our forum.  There are wonderfully supportive fantastic women here!  You will be welcomed with open arms.

I m/c at 8 weeks, after hearing the heartbeat the week prior, so I understand how devastating that can be.  I will never get that wondeful sound out of my ears.  However, we were informed there was a 50/50 chance, so I guess I was prepared as best anyone could be.

BIG HUGS - I'm so sorry for you loss.