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Missed Miscarriage- how long to wait to naturally miscarry?
I'm waiting on a missed miscarriage. This is my 2nd missed miscarriage and I had a miscarriage before that as well. I have 2 healthy children prior to all 3 miscarriages.
My 1st missed miscarriage was complicated. I started spotting at about 6 1/2 weeks. I didn't get in for an ultrasound until 7w5d, the found the baby measuring 6w4d with a good heartbeat and small clot behind the placenta. I was so relieved. I had gotten pregnant charting my temp and I continued to do so, originally out of curiosity and later out of concern. I just knew something wasn't right. I was still bleeding off and on, and with the dates being off by a week. When I should have been 10weeks my temp plummeted (it was Friday after Thanksgiving) I got in for an ultrasound the following Wednesday. The baby hadn't grown at all since that 1st ultrasound, no heart beat. The gave me 3 options, a D&C, cytotec, or wait it out- he gave me 6 weeks, before I would 'need' the D&C.
I had been seeing a midwife prior to the 2nd ultrasound, she recommending several herbs to speed things along so as not to need the D&C. I took them as directed. I literally passed the last of the tissue the day before the Dr called to force me to schedule the D&C. Technically I believe I carried that baby after it passed away for about 8 weeks.
This time... I went in for my 1st appt (I was seeing a reg OB, not the midwife) at 7w5d. It once again measured 6 days behind, normal heartbeat. They put me on progesterone supplements. A week later, 8w4d, I just felt to normal, as in not pregnant. I got an ultrasound for that afternoon, once again saw the baby, measuring 8w1d with a good heartbeat! They told me it was safe to share the news so I did. I went in 12 days later for the original follow up to the 1st ultrasound, I had sent my husband on his business trip expecting all to be well. It wasn't. The baby stopped growing again and no heartbeat, still measured 8w1d when I should have been 10w3d. This time the Dr was very kind (different Dr), offered the D&C or to wait for a natural miscarriage, which she warned me could take some time. I'm now what would be 13w4d. I've bled off an on since 3 days after the last ultrasound. I'm guessing I lost this one at roughly 9 weeks, so I'm 4 weeks into my waiting for it to happen.
I know what to watch for in case of infection, I'm really worried about passing the baby and tissues as the last one was very easy without the heavy bleeding, and the 1st one was- while not easy, not terribly difficult either, more like your 'textbook' miscarriage. I'm just impatient but unwilling to have a D&C unless it becomes medically necessary. I'm wondering how long most women wait to have a missed miscarriage naturally. So many people seem to get impatient and have the D&C after a few weeks, not that I'm putting that down, just that it's not the info I'm looking for. It's certainly a woman's choice, it just happens mine is to do it as naturally as possible.
My 1st missed miscarriage was complicated. I started spotting at about 6 1/2 weeks. I didn't get in for an ultrasound until 7w5d, the found the baby measuring 6w4d with a good heartbeat and small clot behind the placenta. I was so relieved. I had gotten pregnant charting my temp and I continued to do so, originally out of curiosity and later out of concern. I just knew something wasn't right. I was still bleeding off and on, and with the dates being off by a week. When I should have been 10weeks my temp plummeted (it was Friday after Thanksgiving) I got in for an ultrasound the following Wednesday. The baby hadn't grown at all since that 1st ultrasound, no heart beat. The gave me 3 options, a D&C, cytotec, or wait it out- he gave me 6 weeks, before I would 'need' the D&C.
I had been seeing a midwife prior to the 2nd ultrasound, she recommending several herbs to speed things along so as not to need the D&C. I took them as directed. I literally passed the last of the tissue the day before the Dr called to force me to schedule the D&C. Technically I believe I carried that baby after it passed away for about 8 weeks.
This time... I went in for my 1st appt (I was seeing a reg OB, not the midwife) at 7w5d. It once again measured 6 days behind, normal heartbeat. They put me on progesterone supplements. A week later, 8w4d, I just felt to normal, as in not pregnant. I got an ultrasound for that afternoon, once again saw the baby, measuring 8w1d with a good heartbeat! They told me it was safe to share the news so I did. I went in 12 days later for the original follow up to the 1st ultrasound, I had sent my husband on his business trip expecting all to be well. It wasn't. The baby stopped growing again and no heartbeat, still measured 8w1d when I should have been 10w3d. This time the Dr was very kind (different Dr), offered the D&C or to wait for a natural miscarriage, which she warned me could take some time. I'm now what would be 13w4d. I've bled off an on since 3 days after the last ultrasound. I'm guessing I lost this one at roughly 9 weeks, so I'm 4 weeks into my waiting for it to happen.
I know what to watch for in case of infection, I'm really worried about passing the baby and tissues as the last one was very easy without the heavy bleeding, and the 1st one was- while not easy, not terribly difficult either, more like your 'textbook' miscarriage. I'm just impatient but unwilling to have a D&C unless it becomes medically necessary. I'm wondering how long most women wait to have a missed miscarriage naturally. So many people seem to get impatient and have the D&C after a few weeks, not that I'm putting that down, just that it's not the info I'm looking for. It's certainly a woman's choice, it just happens mine is to do it as naturally as possible.
I went to hospital yesterday after having a couple of light bleeds to find out that instead of reading 10wks im reading 6wks , I've been told to come back in 10 day to see if any change , but dr thinks there is an abnormality , if I've not miscarried by then .. What happens will I have to have anything done on that day as its my younger sons birthday , such a mess
ive had 3 miscarriages, the 1st 2 were natural and 3rd one d&c. it was alot less painful with d&c and i only bled very lightly for about 3 days after the surgery. the first 2 were awful i was sent home from the hospital both times to miscarry naturally and the cramps and the blood coming out was soo hard i could see the baby coming out of me falling into the toilet. all three times were just as hard having to go thru knowing your losing your baby but id do a dnc over naturally if i do infact ever miscarry again. thats just my personal opinion. im very sorry for your loss. i know how hard it is and emotionally im still a wreck and its been 5 months since my last miscarriage. were ttc again but this times its takin alot longer than before. all 3 of my miscarriage were within a 9month period. does anyone know if have a dnc takes longer to get pregnant afterward??
1 Comments
I'm not sure what your doctor told you about getting pregnant again but...I'm going through a missed miscarriage right now and my doctor told me that we should wait about 6 months to try again as it takes time for our bodies to go back to normal and everything after something like this happens. The less time you wait, the higher risk of having a miscarriage again.
I hope you have better luck next time and don't ever have to go through this terrible experience again.
I can say this is definitely the hardest thing I've had to deal with. It's incredibly devastating and terrible.
Xo
I hope you have better luck next time and don't ever have to go through this terrible experience again.
I can say this is definitely the hardest thing I've had to deal with. It's incredibly devastating and terrible.
Xo
My goodness... all the stories make me unbelievably sad.. Im so sorry for everyone thats had to go through an experience like this...I had been trying to get pregnant for a year now... i was told 3 weeks and a half ago that my baby died his size was of 8w/4d. i was devastated, i got another u/s a week later to have peace of mind... same results, so I've now been waiting for 3 weeks and a half since i was told, roughly 4 weeks since it did pass away... the doctor gave me an appointment for D&C which ive had before and it was traumatizing, he didnt give me any other options either... anyways i told her i was not having the D&C and after that she was not very helpful. I've been a nerve wreck since and i'm emotionally worn out, and i'm not sure how safe it is to wait for it to pass naturally as doctors around here do not support the idea, im trying to figure out a reasonable amount of time to wait for it to pass naturally, if not, is there anything i can drink (maybe herbs or something natural) thats not cytotec as ive heard horrible stories about that too, one of them above... I've had no spotting and no other kind of liquids either... so if you can please do help my email adress is ***@**** if anyone prefers to do it privately, but i'm surely needing some adavice... I'd appreciate it sooo much.. Thanks ladies, a hug for all...
Hi. A way down the track, I hope this isn't any kind of painful reminder, however your posts have helped me so much, I wanted to thank you for sharing and also to share my story in the hope it does the same for someone else.
I am 25, I have a small adhesion/ calcification on the wall of my uterus from a botched termination when I was about 19. Otherwise healthy (other than history of mild bv), with regular 28 day cycles.
LMP was 1st March 2012, positive home pg test 1st April 2012. Initially overwhelmed, although we had been trying (for 1 month only), then overjoyed.
Went for first scan at what should have been 8 weeks and 2 or 3 days, went to gyno who had seen me through problems after termination, as he knew my history. He did and internal scan, using his u/s machine which is not the best/ clearest available. He couldn't detect a heartbeat, gestational sac was 8 weeks size, yolk sac/ foetus showed only 5 weeks 3 days.
He told me the pregnancy was definitely not viable, scheduled me for a D&C 4 days later (offered no other option), although he said to get a second u/s with a better machine 2 days later anyway. I left in pieces, I had not expected anything to be wrong, I had had no bleeding and my pregnancy symptoms were strong and getting stronger by the day.
Booked in for 2nd opinion u/s the next day... couldn't believe it when I saw a heartbeat on the moniter! The sonographers words were "you're not out of the woods yet" as it was still slow growing, even if I had ovulated late, it would still be a weeks growth behind, but they were smiley and positive. I left still apprehensive, but with a very real glimmer of hope as I had little knowledge of early miscarriage and imagined odds dropped significantly after a hb is detected. Booked in for follow up a week later.
The night before follow up I held a launch for my brand. By about 10pm I felt like I had over done it, I was tired, a little light headed, didn't want to talk to anyone and also had a bit of musty smelling clear discharge (which I didn't think anything of as had had a relapse of bv due to pg hormones, but was managing w/ probiotics). Woke up in a cold sweat that night with nightmare and an eery "something's not right" feeling.
Scan next day showed 6 days growth (should have been 7) and no heartbeat.
I left without seeing the resident ob/gyn, went home and waited a week. I barely left the house and spent all day researching miscarriage and misdiagnosed miscarriage, still thinking maybe they had it wrong. It seemed to me there were just too many variables for them to diagnose so finitely. I was shocked and dismayed at the number of cases where doctors so readily suggest a d&c (apart from not mentioning or considering the risks such as asherman's syndrome), there are hundreds of stories of misdiagnosed miscarriages (misdiagnosedmiscarriage.com) where women are told their pg is not viable, only to go on to carry a healthy baby to full term. Devastatingly there are also some where they have the procedure only to realise down the track they were not given sufficient testing to ensure it was not viable. Get a second, third, fourth, 10th opinion... whatever you feel you need.
Unfortunately mine was not viable (although I am grateful if it had to end, it is now and not down the track). I finally booked in to see a new doctor 17th of May, a professor who specialises in miscarriage. He took my history and was sure the pg had ended, although I asked him to do a scan anyway, for my peace of mind. Scan showed sac collapsing (irregular shape). I told him I would rather wait and let it happen naturally, and he agreed, especially given that I already had some damage from a previous d&c. He warned me of possible pain, heavy bleeding and passing tissue, and told me he expected it would begin quite soon, and should resolve completely within a week, after which I was to come back for a scan to ensure there was no retained tissue.
That was 2 and a half weeks ago. I had some brown spotting immediately after intercourse (first and only time in weeks) about 10 days ago, a tiny bit when I wiped the next day, then nothing for days, about 4 days ago I started having some very light spotting, brown/pinkish dilute, only enough to spot one pad a day, and maybe a bit at night, so i began taking a black/blue cohosh tincture hoping it would speed things along, it seemed to help, although I had a day of severe headache and nausea and threw up once, so I have stopped taking it, although I think it was because I took it in combination with a tramadol (to sleep, I was a mess).
Some light cramping, but barely even worth mentioning.
I don't want to leave the house for fear I'll start having a big bleed/ pain while out.. The waiting is definitely hard.
I will update with how I go, but 2 more things I think are worth mentioning. Naturally I was frantic trying to find out what could have caused this, even though both doctors opinions seemed to be it was just mother nature saying the conditions weren't right.
One concern was bv, I know there is some evidence to suggest it can cause 2nd trimester m/c, however the professer I saw said he had not ever seen gardnerella outside the vagina (i was also concerned it increased my risk of infection while waiting to m/c naturally), I also had a complete resolution of symptoms by inserting probiotic capsules. The brand he said seems to work universally is called ecovag, although I had success just using Blackmores womens biobalance.
The other thing I feel I must mention, especially if anyone reading this has suffered multiple miscarriages is B12.
ALL women pregnant or trying should be taking it along with their folic acid. You need it to activate folic acid!
B12 deficiency is not a routine test for multiple miscarriages, even though it has been proven to cause m/c.
A less likely possibility is a genetic condition called "intrinsic factor deficiency", where b12 absorption is impaired. This is easily overcome by taking b12 in a sublingual form (either tabs to dissolve under tongue or a spray).
Lots of love to anyone who has/ is going through a miscarriage. It is the hardest thing I have ever endured.
I hope this helps someone out there, as all the stories from other women have helped me.
XXX
I am 25, I have a small adhesion/ calcification on the wall of my uterus from a botched termination when I was about 19. Otherwise healthy (other than history of mild bv), with regular 28 day cycles.
LMP was 1st March 2012, positive home pg test 1st April 2012. Initially overwhelmed, although we had been trying (for 1 month only), then overjoyed.
Went for first scan at what should have been 8 weeks and 2 or 3 days, went to gyno who had seen me through problems after termination, as he knew my history. He did and internal scan, using his u/s machine which is not the best/ clearest available. He couldn't detect a heartbeat, gestational sac was 8 weeks size, yolk sac/ foetus showed only 5 weeks 3 days.
He told me the pregnancy was definitely not viable, scheduled me for a D&C 4 days later (offered no other option), although he said to get a second u/s with a better machine 2 days later anyway. I left in pieces, I had not expected anything to be wrong, I had had no bleeding and my pregnancy symptoms were strong and getting stronger by the day.
Booked in for 2nd opinion u/s the next day... couldn't believe it when I saw a heartbeat on the moniter! The sonographers words were "you're not out of the woods yet" as it was still slow growing, even if I had ovulated late, it would still be a weeks growth behind, but they were smiley and positive. I left still apprehensive, but with a very real glimmer of hope as I had little knowledge of early miscarriage and imagined odds dropped significantly after a hb is detected. Booked in for follow up a week later.
The night before follow up I held a launch for my brand. By about 10pm I felt like I had over done it, I was tired, a little light headed, didn't want to talk to anyone and also had a bit of musty smelling clear discharge (which I didn't think anything of as had had a relapse of bv due to pg hormones, but was managing w/ probiotics). Woke up in a cold sweat that night with nightmare and an eery "something's not right" feeling.
Scan next day showed 6 days growth (should have been 7) and no heartbeat.
I left without seeing the resident ob/gyn, went home and waited a week. I barely left the house and spent all day researching miscarriage and misdiagnosed miscarriage, still thinking maybe they had it wrong. It seemed to me there were just too many variables for them to diagnose so finitely. I was shocked and dismayed at the number of cases where doctors so readily suggest a d&c (apart from not mentioning or considering the risks such as asherman's syndrome), there are hundreds of stories of misdiagnosed miscarriages (misdiagnosedmiscarriage.com) where women are told their pg is not viable, only to go on to carry a healthy baby to full term. Devastatingly there are also some where they have the procedure only to realise down the track they were not given sufficient testing to ensure it was not viable. Get a second, third, fourth, 10th opinion... whatever you feel you need.
Unfortunately mine was not viable (although I am grateful if it had to end, it is now and not down the track). I finally booked in to see a new doctor 17th of May, a professor who specialises in miscarriage. He took my history and was sure the pg had ended, although I asked him to do a scan anyway, for my peace of mind. Scan showed sac collapsing (irregular shape). I told him I would rather wait and let it happen naturally, and he agreed, especially given that I already had some damage from a previous d&c. He warned me of possible pain, heavy bleeding and passing tissue, and told me he expected it would begin quite soon, and should resolve completely within a week, after which I was to come back for a scan to ensure there was no retained tissue.
That was 2 and a half weeks ago. I had some brown spotting immediately after intercourse (first and only time in weeks) about 10 days ago, a tiny bit when I wiped the next day, then nothing for days, about 4 days ago I started having some very light spotting, brown/pinkish dilute, only enough to spot one pad a day, and maybe a bit at night, so i began taking a black/blue cohosh tincture hoping it would speed things along, it seemed to help, although I had a day of severe headache and nausea and threw up once, so I have stopped taking it, although I think it was because I took it in combination with a tramadol (to sleep, I was a mess).
Some light cramping, but barely even worth mentioning.
I don't want to leave the house for fear I'll start having a big bleed/ pain while out.. The waiting is definitely hard.
I will update with how I go, but 2 more things I think are worth mentioning. Naturally I was frantic trying to find out what could have caused this, even though both doctors opinions seemed to be it was just mother nature saying the conditions weren't right.
One concern was bv, I know there is some evidence to suggest it can cause 2nd trimester m/c, however the professer I saw said he had not ever seen gardnerella outside the vagina (i was also concerned it increased my risk of infection while waiting to m/c naturally), I also had a complete resolution of symptoms by inserting probiotic capsules. The brand he said seems to work universally is called ecovag, although I had success just using Blackmores womens biobalance.
The other thing I feel I must mention, especially if anyone reading this has suffered multiple miscarriages is B12.
ALL women pregnant or trying should be taking it along with their folic acid. You need it to activate folic acid!
B12 deficiency is not a routine test for multiple miscarriages, even though it has been proven to cause m/c.
A less likely possibility is a genetic condition called "intrinsic factor deficiency", where b12 absorption is impaired. This is easily overcome by taking b12 in a sublingual form (either tabs to dissolve under tongue or a spray).
Lots of love to anyone who has/ is going through a miscarriage. It is the hardest thing I have ever endured.
I hope this helps someone out there, as all the stories from other women have helped me.
XXX
Thanks to ALL of you for sharing your stories. I found out this morning @ 12 wks that my baby stopped growing @ 10 weeks. I was planning to wait and m/c naturally but now I really am not sure. I've had two previous natural m/c, but they were at about 5-6 weeks, so this is WAY different. I cannot imagine waiting 6+ weeks to miscarry. Plus, I am already anxious to ttc again. This was supposed to be our 5th and final baby, and I don't know how willing hubby will be to try one more time. :'(
Hi have tears streaming down my face at your stories. They all so similar to mine. I am waiting for a miscarriage to happen. I went last week for a scan to be told the heartbeat has stopped. I should have been 10 weeks but baby not really been thriving since 6 wks. Every scan has not been good with slow heartbeats & irregular shaped gestation sac so wasn't a shock to find baby had finally passed away. I am now getting to the stage where I have had enough of waiting & need to be able to move on. I am scared to go anywhere or do anything in case it starts then. On the other hand there is no way I can brave a D&C. I hate being put to sleep and worry about scarring too much. I already have enough trouble without anything else. This is my 3rd miscarriage so I will also be able to have testing but I just need it over with. Thanks for sharing your stories. It helps to know others have been through this horrendous experience. I miscarried immediately with the 1st at 20 wks & then the 2nd took 2 wks at 8wks so I assumed this one would happen quickly also. It seems like a double blow to lose your baby then not miscarry immediately. I have spent weeks praying to stop bleeding ...now I am praying to start. Good luck ladies. I hope you never ever have to go through this again.
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