No Heart beat .. Devastated

[Angelgone128]

yesterday was the worst day ever... I had cramp that woke me up from sleep the night before and I got scared and thought maybe I was going to miscarry, but no blood so I went back to bed.  Yesterday morning I felt fine and went about my day.  Then around 2pm went to bathroom and saw brown discharge like when I wiped.  I immediately when to ER.  I was 8 weeks and couple days.  They did a transvaginal ultrasound saw the baby and sac but no movement and no heart beat.  They sent me home telling me I am pass the baby in few days.  I went to my Obgyn today just to confirm as I don't get how this can happen?  I did everything I am suppose to do but I know I was under a lot of stress bc this was unplanned and I am not married.  I finally decided to keep the baby as I think it's a miracle that I conceived with one time at tail end of 39 and I just turned 40 , 3 days ago... Now I am faced with no baby now.  I am so heart broken beyond words.  The doc told me to let it pass naturally but I read some people think D&C is better?  Please advise ... I am incapable to know what I should do... I am so heart broken... I saw my baby heart beat couple weeks ago ... And now ... It's gone.  How do life still go on?  How does a mom deal with a child Loss?  This is my first .... And the loss is just overwhelming with no words to describe the pain in my heart.  I love my baby ... Lord, please take good care of him/her....

[Angelgone128]

Thank you everyone for sharing ur stories and I wish none of us ever had to go thru this.   I was angry but now I am just so empty with this loss.  I saw my empty Womb today as I naturally miscarried on Friday.  It was painful but I was glad I did it naturally.  I pray that we all have our rainbow baby soon for those who are going thru the loss or had losses.  I pray with much blessings for those who have healthy pregnancy!!!

[Stealthelf]

I miscarried a few years back with a blighted ovum, and I didn't need the d&c but did have a run to the er with some heavy bleeding. It was a difficult time, but you will get through it. I chose a name for my baby and got a special necklace to remember him/her by. (((hugs)))

[Nikki148]

Oh I did have a d&c didn't wanna wait to let it pass bcuz U don't know when it will happen. It was fast and easy and had lil to no pain after.

[Liane88930]

Very sorry for your loss. Please don't blame yourself. There is no rhyme or reason and it's unfair. I've had 4 losses and each one was heartbreaking. The three that were before 10 weeks i passed naturally and things went fine. Take the time you need to grieve. I found some good support in loss groups online. I hope you find peace.

[Nikki148]

I know how U feel angel it happened to me last June one week I seen heartbeat nxt week there was none. Like U said the devastation is unbearable but U will go on. when I asked doc what happened she said it must of been a chromosome issue with the fetus that's usually U ppl miscarriage. UR body knows something is wrong and get rid of the fetus . I guess our body lets us know we wouldn't have a healthy baby and that's a great thing!!! I was upset for a while but was comforted knowing it was nothing I did wrong and U shld know it was nothing U did either!! Our bodies so amazing things to ensure our health.  Don't let this stop U from trying again!!! I didn't and now I'm 11w and this baby is doing fine. Good luck!!

[blessedandcounting]

I went with a d&c last yr with my miscarriage. I was also devastated because we were trying so hard. But when something is wrong that's just it. Nothing we did just something was wrong with it. After a few months we decided to try again. It is hard right now but this to shall pass. My sympathies.

[kiki24115]

I did a D&C to make sure it all q as cleared out...you will go on fine..just emotional in the beginning. .it's nothing you did wrong it just means something wasn't developing right with the fetus...good luck in the future if you try to conceive again...you are only 40 women on here are 43+ and conceiving so stay positive