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Avatar universal

So confused,anyone advice??

Hi all,I have just been to my doctor for a post miscarriage checkup(I misscarried at 8 weeks),I am 41 and the pregnancy was a shock at first as I already have two teenage beautiful children. But after I miscarriage 3 weeks ago i havent been able to stop thinking of the baby that was.,and that perhaps I could have another child at 41,all these feelings and I cry all the time when I see babies and pregnant women etc.Anyway I went to the doctor for the check up and also to tell her of vaginal dryness i have been having for a while.She told me it could be a sign of menopause(what Ive just been pregnant)?????how can that be??? and prescribed me overstin  (which I found out later was a hormone replacement thing).?? I told her how I was feeling and she said it was normal etc to feel like that,and i also told her I feel like trying for another baby...............she again said she wouldnt recommend it as she thinks that this miscarriage was due to my age and  their being something wrong genetically,and it could happen again.And that I should take this as a sign and just move on with my life......well if this is so then why do i feel so strongly about trying again.....I am so confused and dont know what to do.....apart from one thing i am changing doctors thats for sure......I would appreciate any advice....
I have to say that I find this forum wonderful  and found everyones posts so sad but a great sense of help as it was like having a friend with you who has gone through the same thing...Thank you everone xx
5 Responses
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891721 tn?1257322769
i was trying for 18 months when i fell pregnant last year (naturally) sadly i lost the baby at 12 weeks and thought that was my last chance as i have server endometrosis and they found out i had pcos when i went for the scan after my m/c (in which they think the pcos caused my m/c) - we kept ttc and weren't getting pregnant so doc gave me clomid to help us on our way and on the 2nd cycle i feel pregnant but sadly again i lost my babies 5 weeks ago 1 after the other, but i want our baby so much am not going to let it stop me getting my bfp again so dont let it put you of (trust me i dont even want to move when i fall pregnant again) but its a chance am going to take to get what we want.
hope that gives you some help in deciding what you want x
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Thank you ladies for your words of advice.I am still thinking of trying again although I must say I feel scared of going through another miscarriage again,I am still a confused mess.I dont understand why I was given another chance of being pregnant(as i know at 41 i was very lucky to conceive naturally) but then it all went wrong.I feel like that was my last chance.I read your replys and it does though fill me will hope.thank you xx
Helpful - 0
693804 tn?1304720474
I'm sorry for your loss. I'm also 41(42 on Friday) I lost my son in October at almost 5 months, my Dr. told me after my delivery that he saw no reason for me to not try again. There are many women that are in their 40's and go on to have healthy babies. I've been trying since December and will continue until I get my BFP. The fear is there but I refuse to let it take my dream away. I hope you get better advice from your new Dr. Keep me updated........Lori
Helpful - 0
891721 tn?1257322769
if  you want another baby i say go for it women have baby's older than 41, and maybe your baby was a sign of the oppisite what your doc said i say let fate take its course and if its ment to be it'll happen
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
its your life, you are a Grown women oviously. if you feel like you want to have another child your the one to make that choice, not your doctor. But there can be complications becuase of your age, but there can be complications in any pregnancy.
Helpful - 0
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