GRAPHIC MISCARRIAGE DETAILS - PLEASE DO NOT READ IF THIS WILL UPSET YOU!!
I recently suffered my 2nd miscarriage at 10.5 weeks. I saved the tissue that I passed and gave it to the nurse in the ER for testing. Although I signed all of the paperwork to have the testing done, apparently the tissue was discarded and the tests were not done for some reason, even though my OB wanted to have the testing done also. I cannot tell you how devastating this is for me!
The miscarriage was expected, as an ultrasound at my 9-week visit did not clearly show the baby or a heartbeat, just the sac and an unclear shadow inside. I know I'll never have many answers about what happened now, but I'm just trying to determine what the origin of the tissue I saw really was. It was not gray or flesh-colored, but dark red and resembling liver. Right after I passed this tissue, I had several intense cramps and passed more - something else that I didn't recognize that was definitely not just a blood clot. It reminded me of the placenta pictures in the childbirth books, except that it was much smaller. I did not look very closely because it was too difficult and I did not want to see any more than what I had already seen.
I lost quite a bit of blood and it was really difficult just to stay conscious at all. I placed all of my trust in the Dr. and the hospital that they would take care of the tissue for me and give me the answers that I need, or at least try to get them. My main concern is that I don't know how we can tell if the baby was really ever growing or not and I just miscarried it, or was the sac empty and I just miscarried the rest of the tissue that had grown without ever really carrying a baby? My Hcg at 5.5 weeks was 3000, but only 14000 at 9.5 weeks, and then it went to 4700 the day I miscarried at 10.5 weeks. I'm hoping some info will help put my mind at ease as I try to decide whether I want to try again.
first, I'd like you to read this whole post and read everyone's answers.
I had many many questions of why I had a miscarriage and the responses that I got were very very helpful. You can also read up on miscarriages but the reality is that the cause of a miscarriage is usually a chromosonal abnormality of the fetus. In other words the sperm and egg didn't meet right so the embryo didn't form as it should have, so your body is supossed to discard it and it did. It is not pretty and it's very sad but its natural. Now that does not mean that you will continue to get miscarriages. Its just that the right conditions weren't met for you to continue the pregnancy.
If you have a family history of some disorder then definitely get checked out.
Also about the tissue, well basically your uterus forms a whole new organ when you get pregnant which is the placenta, full with blood vessels veins, tissue etc. at 10.5 weeks your placenta is still being developed but soon will take over the nourishment of your baby. So, yes probably what was coming out of you was the beginnings of placenta. I was 7 weeks when I had my m/c and I passed a ton of tissue and big clumps of stuff which was really gross. But that's better than having a d&c. And I've never felt so much pain in my life.
Please read the post, I know its dissapointing to have two m/c's but don't quit, you will be able to have a baby sooner or later. Don't give up.
Just to confirm for you. My experiences was the same. I wondered also about what the tissue was exactly. I'm so sorry for you for what happened after. But again some things just can't be answered especially the kind of answer we are looking for. All you can do now is take good care of yourself. And if you are thinking of trying again in the future continue with your vitamins and eating healthy and taking your doctors advise. My doctor told me that quite often they don't even get concerned till you've had at least three in a row.
Thank you everyone for your comments. My Dr. really wanted to do testing after this latest miscarriage because I am already at high-risk (37 years old with no successful pregnancies, endometriosis, and high blood pressure that requires medication). Because of the family history of hypertension, aneurysms, strokes, etc., I was advised not to get pregnant in my 20's, and of course with endo a couple of my docs originally thought I couldn't get pregnant anyway. Turns out it's not hard for me to conceive, but I just can't seem to stay pregnant for very long. This is my 2nd miscarriage in six months. I spoke to the ER doc finally today, and he investigated to see why the testing wasn't done. Apparently it was some dumb paperwork issue and the admin staff simply "dropped the ball."
I'm not sure what we'll do at this point. My Dr. wants to run some tests to see if there's something wrong with me that's causing the miscarriages. Apparently my blood work at the ER had some abnormalities, so he's suspicious of that.
The saddest part of this is that pregnancy should be such a joyous time in our lives, but if I get pregnant again, I know that my husband and I won't even be able to enjoy it that much due to the anxiety. The first time, we told everyone right away, and we were still getting congratulations from people long after the miscarriage, which was very painful. I went to my niece's confirmation three months after the 1st mc and ran into an old family friend who asked me whether it was a boy or girl right there in front of everyone. This last time we didn't tell anyone, and so I was stuck telling my office that I was sick once the doctor put me on bed reset, but I had eventually had to explain it to them, too.
At least talking to other people who've gone through it helps somewhat. Thanks again
I understand not telling. I felt that way also. We even hid it ( or so we thought ) from our two older sons. I'm 39 and have had 4 mc in the past three years. When we did finally tell them we found out that they already were pretty sure about it. It is kinda of exciting having such a great secret with your husband. But don't keep the secret because your afraid. Family and friends should be supportive. Sometimes they try to be helpful but say the wrong things and we just try to be forgiving. I found out this morning that I'm pregnant again. And I'm now debating the issue of telling or not myself. I can give the advise and read it in the books about mc. But it is terifying knowing the possiblilities. Can I get excited can I tell people? Well I'm not holding back because eventually they find out. Whether its when I starting showing again or if mc happens. I just need to let my husband know first.
determined39, Congratulations on your new pregnancy. With your own losses that you've experienced, you can understand how I feel. I tried to convince myself with the first miscarriage, especially since it was my first pregnancy, that it just wasn't meant to be, but even my Dr. was surprised by the 2nd loss. I didn't have any signs that anything was wrong, so we don't even know when the baby stopped developing. And since I've never had a successful pregnancy, there really could be a reason for these losses. About not telling, I was planning to tell everyone once we got to 12 weeks or maybe even after 9.5 weeks since I had an appt. that week to hear the baby's heartbeat. My doc said at that point I would have less than a 5% chance of miscarrying. But if I get pregnant again now, I might really wait a long time, even more than 12 weeks.
I'm also debating now whether to see a reproductive endocrinologist. I like the OB I used for my last pregnancy, but I think maybe my situation is a little over his head right now. Does anyone have opinions or experiences with the RE vs. OB/GYN debate? I could use the input. My husband and I have pretty much decided we may only try one more time.
i had a m/c nat 11 weeks .. i passed clot after clot that was the size of softballs and an intense amount of pain ... my hubby said i looked like a train wreck victim ... none of it was the products of conception its just how those type of clots look ... i ended up getting a d & c when i failed the tilt test and thats when the "products of conception" were finally cleared out ... dammm i hate their medical terms
so so so sorry for ur loss and praying u peace
sharon, were you as surprised by the amount of bleeding when you miscarried? When I miscarried the first time, it was like a period, but this time I lost so much blood my blood pressure went really low and I had a hard time even not passing out for about two hours. My husband was like yours. We said that the scene in the bathroom was like a horror movie! I had to wake him out of a sound sleep to call the Dr. I couldn't even get off the bathroom floor, and there was blood everywhere. I ruined my bathroom rugs and the towels. I was not prepared for that part of it at all, and was sorry that my husband had to see it!
I know what you mean about all of the terminology they use. In the ER after my first miscarriage, the nurse actually called the baby "chunks". I could have killed her. It's one thing to have to listen to them calling the baby by any other words so that they don't actually say "baby" --- tissue, POC, "contents of the uterus," etc., but what that nurse said was even worse.
Both of my miscarriages have been natural, and I haven't needed a D&C either time, thank goodness. I didn't want to have to go through anything else.
HI, JUST WANTED TO SAY FIRST OF ALL, I'M SO SORRY. VERY SIMILAR THING HAPPENED TO ME, ONLY I CALLED THE ER B 4 I LEFT HOME TO SEE IF I NEEDED TO BRING "EVERYTHING" WITH ME. THEY TOLD ME NO. THEY TOLD ME THEY DIDN'T KNOW THE REASON ETHER. I WAS 10 WEEKS. I WASN'T EVEN 100% SURE I WAS PREGNET. I HAD IRREGULAR CYCLES. I STARTED HAVING SOME VERY INTENCE CRAMPS AROUND 10:30PM. DECIDED TO GO TO BED AND GET SOME REST. THE CRAMPS JUST GOT WORSE AND WORSE. AROUND 2:30AM I WENT TO TAKE A SHOWER TO HELP MYSELF RELAX. I WAS STANDING THERE ONE MINUTE THEN THE NEXT THE WORST PAIN I HAVE EVER FELT CAME. IT LITERALLY BROUGHT ME TO MY KNEES. THEN I FELT A HUGH PRESSUR AND REACHED DOWN AND CAUGHT MY BABY. I WAS HORRIFIED. BLOOD WAS EVERYWHERE AND POURING OUT OF ME. I YELLED FOR MY HUSBAND TO HELP. HE CALLED HIS SISTER WHO HAD HAD A MISCARRAGE HERSELF AND TOLD US TO CALL THE ER B 4 WE WENT. I STODE THERE FOR WHAT SEEMED FOR FOREVER HOLDING HIM (OR HER) THEY TOLD US TO JUST "FLUSH IT" AND COME IN. THEN WHEN I GOT THERE THEY FRONT DESK GIRL ASKED ME IF I BROUGHT "IT" WITH ME. I GUESS THEY CAN SAY THINGS LIKE THIS WHEN IT ISN'T THEM THAT IS GOING THROUGH IT. I WISH YOU THE BEST OF LUCK. GOD BLESS. AND KNOW YOUR NOT ALONE AND IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT.
AuntDD, your experience does sound really similar to mine. I'm so sorry you had to go through it, too. I took a bath during my m/c when I thought the worst part was over. I thought it would make me feel better, too. And I ended up bleeding all over the bathtub. I read somewhere about a Catholic hospital where the nuns actually pray over the baby's remains in the lab before any testing is done. I know not everyone is religious, but at least in that case SOMEONE is acknowledging that a life has been lost and it mattered. It sounds like the people at the hospital were really not that helpful with you --- do they all need sensitivity training on this subject, or what? Maybe I'll bring that up when I file a formal complaint against the hospital for what they did. I've already started it. Especially after the Dr. seemed to blame it on the hospital, too.
Personally, I would have liked to have buried my baby. I have found out that there's a law in my state that says the hospital was supposed to inform me of my options for "disposal." I know some parents do it and they say it helps them feel better.
I can relate to your story completely, the same thing happened with me i was 9wk1day when i had the scan which showed uncertain shadow inside, within a week i passed the sac still whole and placenta attached to it, i tried t get answers as no one told me this was likely to happen, i went down to the hospital where they gave me 2 choices, send to the nearest crematorium or dispose of myself, obviously i buried him in my garden (I say him as a spiritulist picked up on him without me sayin a word), it is a very frightening time especially where no one tells you anything, i knew from the start i was going to lose as i had mild cramps from the start, my hcg were risin but not doubling - and the hospital basically said oh well it not looking good so dont get attached! the hospital could tell whether of not it was part of foetus or not, like you i basically knew what it was, as far as i am aware they are unable to test the tissue for signs of cause of anythin like that. I hope you are feeling well, take the time to grieve i didnt i wish i did.
I'm glad you had the chance to bury your baby. I wish I had that. This was my 2nd miscarriage, but I really wasn't showing any signs that anything was wrong this time. I went to my 9 wk appt all excited to hear the heart beat and they could only see a shadow in the sac, no clear image of the baby and no heartbeat.The blood test showed my levels were rising, so the nurse told me everything was fine and we should be able to see more on the next ultrasound. I was bleeding a tiny bit after the vaginal ultrasound, but the Dr. warned me about that, so I didn't think anything about it.
After a few days when I was still bleeding a little, I called the Dr., and he said that he had told the nurse to give me good news from the blood test, but that even though the levels were rising, they were not nearly what they should have been for that point in the pregnancy. He told me the bleeding was not from the ultrasound and to be prepared that I was probably about to miscarry again. I have my follow-up appt with him this week, so we'll see what he says. I think that if we try again, it will maybe only be for one more time cuz I can't keep going through this. I wish that the medical community did more to help with this issue and provide support - I think you can tell from the forums how many women are really grieving, and who knows how many miscarriages could be prevented if there were more funding for this issue and they could do more studies? It's all so sad to me.
tseeing a fertility doctor and having them run the reccurent pregnancy loss testing is the best thing you could do. i had the doctor check the removed tissues after my 2nd MC and the only really check for chromosome problems, so if there is something wrong with you, such as low progesterone or a common blood clotting DO that many women have and is easily treatable, is not able to be seen by the testing on the tissues. I am sorry for you loss and sorry that the doctor's did not do what was expected of them. but have the testing done on you and your husband right away so you can have a baby within the next year:)
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