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1875160 tn?1330609662

so hurt

I just had a miscarriage on the 25 of this month I am so heart broken I miscarried my baby girl Robyn Ava C. I was only 4 months headed to 5 I suffer from anxiety panic disorders slowly over coming it but since I miscarried I am seriously out of it like I've done lost it I am silent still in pain since surgery and sadden I have supportive family and husband but that was my 1st pregnancy and my heart was set on her and now I feel so empty like a piece of me is missing I have some baby clothes wthat I hold with her sono and just cry I need help ladies I need help to over come this will I live normal again I feel so blank so dead I just don't know my vision is so cloudy

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Avatar universal
I know how low you can get, how you dont want to think or see anything, you just want to sleep and ignore everything. I know that when I lost my Eve all I could do is blame myself. My body wasnt strong enough for her, I wasnt good enough for her. That depression drags you down and you can barely get out of bed to go to the bathroom. When I was forced to go back to work, all I could do was cry all day and every pregnant lady I saw, I instantly hated. Why was her child allowed to live? Why was that person allowed more than one child when I couldnt even have one? Every baby I saw, I wondered was that child being born as my child died? After a year these thoughts havent gone away. It haunts you every day. But eventually you can get out of bed. Eventually you can go to work, even if you have to find a differnet job to go to. Remember sweetie, you still have all of the hormones rushing your system. It takes a long time for your hormones to level out. It took me 6 months to get my cycle back. You go on the web hoping that you'll find info on getting pregnant again asap, but it takes a long time to get back to where you were. I wanted so bad to get pregnant again before My baby's due date, cause then at least she passed on for a reason, her passing allowed a new child to be born, but it can take along time for your body to bounce back. My reccomendation? Face your grief. Look it right in the eye. Morne your baby, bury her, buy her a present for grave. YOU ARE ALLOWED YOUR GRIEF RIGHT NOW. Do what you need to do to get through today, worry about tommorow tommorow.. If you are going to try again? Then DONT TRY. Relax, cause your stress WILL AFFECT YOUR BODY AND YOUR OVULATION. It took 6 months for me to get my mensus after my loss, but I am still not sure if I have ovulated yet, the test are unsure. Grieve now, Do what you have to do when its time to go back out into the world. RELAX when its time to try again. AND FLAT OUT TELL YOUR PARTNER WHAT YOU NEED FROM THEM. They dont have the hormones flooding their system and will be dealing with their grief different than you are. If they are not giving you what you need. Go and tell them what you need. I wish better for you than what I got, I hope you bounce back faster than I did. But remember you are allowed to grieve right now.
Helpful - 0
1935407 tn?1339234114
hey dear... i hear you... i am 5 month going to 6 when i loss my baby Aidan last Jan 15... i also haven't yet heals and days are so cloudy like your day too.. :(( its hurt bcos he was my 5th pregnancy but also my 1st baby... when i say i understand you trust me i really do.. inbox me if you need someone to share your pain.. i promise you i can truly understand how its feels.. hugs..xx and very sorry you been thru this too... :((
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Avatar universal
I'm so so sorry.  This loss is so recent that I'd expect you to feel the way you do.  with my 1st miscarriage, it took me until the due date passed to finally be able to move on, and still I cried off and on when seeing babies or baby things.  It's hard and it can take a long time. It does get better and the pain does ease, but it takes time.  I talked with a therapist for a while and that helped, so you may want to think about that.  I'm really very sorry.
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Avatar universal
I'm so sorry for your loss. It is completely normal to feel this way especially since it just happened. If you feel that you need to see a therapist that may help they have some that specialize in losses. Really though only time will help you feel better and you can grieve as long as you want. It's good to hear that your family is supportive because that's what you need now.
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Avatar universal
i know exactly how you feel, and if you need someone to talk to, to help you overcome this. Maybe you could inbox me and we could share stories, like a private support group almost. i know how this is and it doesn't feel any better unless you talk to someone who can actually understand what you're going through.

-Ara
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