Anxiety/Panic or more?

[reginalddawkins]

I posted this in the anxiety forum and a user suggested I post it here as well. Thanks for listening.

Hello. I will try to make this brief, although it's a long story.

I am a healthy 27 year old male with a history of mild to moderate anxiety. In the past I had taken Paxil and Celexa with success, although I stopped taking meds late in 2005. I have a history of anxiety surrounding healthcare and all things medical.

This November, after a relatively anxiety-free summer and fall, I relocated and felt my anxiety start to spike just a small bit. Around this time a friend of mine lost her mother to a sudden heart attack and it started me worrying about my health on and off again. Then one night in late November, I smoked a good amount of Marijuana (hadn't ever smoked before smoking on 10-15 occasions this fall) and became almost instantly hyper panicked. I had never felt this "gone" on weed before. It was an awful feeling (one that, most certainly, has left me vowing never to smoke again). I was almost completely depersonalized - felt like I could lose consciousness at any point. About an hour into the ordeal, I was able to take blood pressure - heart rate was 180 or so and both BP readings were beyond stage two hypertension on the chart. Clearly, I was in some sort of panic attack. I thought I was going to die and fell asleep in a state of total panic/tension.

The next morning I woke and found myself feeling quite strange. Very mentally slow and unable to track really. That next day I felt like I was slurring my speech somewhat, like my coordination, vision and comprehension were off. I told myself it was just a bad fog post-marijuana and shook it off. A few days passed and I was still foggy. I found myself worrying about things like my heart rate. Keep in mind I am 27 and healthy. I ran three miles a day this summer.

Then, about a week after the episode, while driving through the city, I really noticed that my vision wasn't right. Lights seemed extra bright and haloed. Signs in the distance were hard to read. I felt like my reaction time was slow to other cars and stimuli from my environment.

Around this same time, my nerves really started to act up. The pinky and ring finger in my left hand would start to feel prickly or numb (you can imagine what this did to my heart fears). Soon, the right hand followed suit. My ulnar nerves in both arms began to feel extra sensitive to the touch. Almost like they were just a dull ache. The nerves along the outside of my lower legs also became noticeably sensitive - if I pushed on them, I'd feel sensations all down through my feet. I woke up one day and felt like my face was also somewhat numb and that my speech was still slightly slurred.

Here is where the anxiety took off. I began to look up all sorts of conditions online (mostly neuro) and would have waves of fear over them. My legs and arms turned from just prickly here and there to a deep, tired ache - not a sick ache, but more like I had just gone running. I would find myself extremely tired for no reason. I'd wake up with tired limbs and have just no energy.

All this time I haven't slept very well. I wake up at least five or six times a night. Haven't slept straight through in a month or more. I also feel like my swallowing is labored. Sometimes like there is a lump I am swallowing hard over.

Over the holidays I went home and one morning I woke, took two or three steps and fainted. After a couple moments I woke up very dazed, sweaty and panicked. Similar, actually, to the feeling of near loss of consciousness I had the night of the weed episode. I ended up going to urgent care because I smashed up my hand during the fall and they sent me to the ER because I had lost consciousness. At the hospital they took my BP sitting and standing, etc... also ran blood tests and found nothing other than a "slight elevated shift" in my WBC.

So I came home from that visit, still foggy, still without answers, and still wondering what is happening to me.

I have a friend who has MS and I have asked her about some of my symptoms - like the fact that I can't seem to recall words quickly, the brain fog in general and the distance vision. She said that when her MS first presented itself, she had vision loss, but it was more complete, like one eye went blind. When I look through a friend's glasses, I can see things clearly. She said that did not sound like a neuro. cause for the vision then.

As you can tell, I am still quite panicked. I am reaching out to whoever will listen and may have some ideas. Without health insurance, I cannot afford to go to a doctor and order up a bunch of tests. I can barely afford to be back on Celexa, but I went back on two weeks ago.

I will summarize my situation and if anyone has any thoughts, I would appreciate it.

- History of anxiety, esp. health-related
- Tingling in hands was felt before episode, but never before starting smoking weed this fall
- Late november marijuana use triggers hours-long episode (panic, I assume)
- Post-episode symptoms that started the next morning:
  - Brain fog, slowness with words, trouble reading and multitasking, cognitive
- Post-episode symptoms that came on more gradually:
  - Nerve pain, muscle fatigue, facial tightness more traditional anxiety (response to symptoms)
- Previously perfect vision, since episode I have trouble with distance and lights
- Sensitivity to loud or sudden sounds
- Feeling like I have trouble with balance
- Trouble swallowing that comes and goes
- Waking up multiple times each night
- Things feel different to my fingers/palms - paper towels feel rougher, for example

I could list more, but I will just leave this novel where it stands, unedited, raw and here for your thoughts. It has been six weeks without much change. I just want to be myself again, to laugh, to smile, to stop thinking I ruined my life with that fateful marijuana use and whatever the heck has happened since. Is it possible that I tweaked my entire CNS that night and am stuck in some sort of panic episode? The only thing I can actually verify is the slightly elevated WBC and the fact that someone's glasses helped my vision. Both of those things could just be anxiety I guess.

Anyway, I'm done typing, my brain feels spent after all this, I am sorry it got so long.

[reginalddawkins]

Thanks for the thoughts, Heather (and Teresa, too).

So you believe that panic could cause all of the things I am feeling? My dear friend who has MS said she just really doesn't think that it would come out of nowhere like that. Of course, I read online and read all sorts of things about how an episode of acute stress can bring on a first MS flare.

This said, I have felt the mental fog since the morning after the panic episode induced by marijuana. I am also aware that I had another panic attack (limited symptom) about two weeks later. As one who has struggled with anxiety in the past, I am aware how powerful the mind is.

Tonight, my nerves (ulnar, most noticeably) started to ache a bit and then my legs felt quite fatigued once more. Thighs like I had just gone running. Then, just as soon as the symptoms come, they'll leave (or at least get better). Others, like the vision, stick around.

I have heard that with neuro. causes, vision doesn't get worse, as much as it gets blocked - like optic neuritis as an example. Also the nerve things I've been feeling didn't seem in keeping with MS to my friend. She said it was more like she woke up one day and her hand was numb. My hands don't feel numb - if anything, my sense of tough seems extra strong... like paper towels feel rougher then normal on my fingertips. It's almost as if every nerve in my body is extra sensitive or something.

Anyway... one more theory - sinuses. I have heard that sinus issues can cause symptoms similar to CFS and I have sinus congestion that seemed to get worse after marijuana use (perhaps fungus in there?).

Oh - and as for your question about laced pot - nobody else I smoked it with that night had this happen.

Okay, I've got to stop rambling here. Hoping I can sleep straight through tonight... haven't in six weeks.

Thanks so much for the support.

[TERESA217]

Your story sounds very similar to what happened to my husband a few years ago-he borrowed what he thought was a normal cigarette-found out later it was a joint.  But, after he smoked half he was driving home and felt shaky and weird- he also suffers from medical anxiety, but knew something was not right, he pulled over and called 911 while talking to the officer he passed out.  In the ambulance they could not wake him or get accurate pulse or blood pressure because it was so high-long story short it wasn't laced like we thought(hospital checked) his potassium was extremely low-it caused leg cramps, heart beat irregularities, hallucinations, felt weak several days after having 3 bags of IV potassium and pills-just a possibility, hope this helps.

[Heather3418]

From what I read, I believe that the one episode after the night of pot smoking may be the result of some "laced" weed.  My son used to be a heavy pot smoker and had talked about this same thing happening to him.

Most pot is laced with THC as you may know, but I have a feeling that you may have gotten ahold of some pot the someone added even more ingredients to.  This is my opinion.

You do sound like a majority of your symptoms are caused from excessive anxiety.  This needs to be discussed with a doctor and you getting back on medication with some possible "talk therapy."  If you finances are a worry, you may be able to get assistance with medication and therapy from the state.

Since I was a panic/anxiety person for almost 20 years (now free from panic for 14 years) I totally understand what you are trying to explain.  I too, was constantly looking up medical information, trying to find out about my "symptoms."  When you become over anxious, the body has a way of letting you know that this anxiety level is too high.  It can manifest itself in many physical ways.  Panic is a real disorder.  I am not minimizing anything you are telling us about.  I have been there and DO understand what you are feeling.

I do have MS and from some of the things you talk about, some things DO sound neurological.  BUT, can also manifest themselves as such, from sheer anxiety alone.  Only a professional can sort this all out.

Of course, testing to rule out any disoders, would probably be his first order of business, just to check your overall general health.  You need to save what money you can if you really want to get to a doctor to find the root of the problems.

I DO think this is anxiety related.  I would be anxious to hear if you still had these symptoms if you got your panic under control.  The mind if a power thing.  Panic can be overcome.

I am sorry that I could not be of more help.  Perhaps others on the forum could add their comments.  I wish you well and hope that you will post again and let us know how things progress when you get to that doctor.  This is one time where money cannot keep you from getting the care you need.  You need to call Social Services in your area and see if there are any assistance programs.  That's exactly what I did all those years ago, when I suffered from panic and had no insurance.

Good luck to you and god bless.  Thank you again for sharing with us....

Heather  

[Heather3418]

Let me read through your post thoroughly and I will get back to you in about 10 minutes.

Sorry I didnt' see your post, until now.  And welcome to the MS Forum.  We are glad that you posted and let's see what we can do to help, if we can.  

Heather