Fed Up

[uk2]

Hi All,

Just come on for a moan really, stuck in bed with spasms in legs feet and handa and pins and neddles in hands and feet and stabbing needle type pain all down my right leg.

Does This Ever end!!  I stay in bed all day then if i can i get up for my kids at 3.22pm and try and be a good mum baring the cuddles cause they even hurt.

Sorry just feeling sorry for myself, did not sleep at all last night, had awful nightmares of my dead parents again and sure that the new drug requip is causing this talking to GP today not that she knows what to do with me LOL

I want a life back, i know God has a purpose in all this but its hard as i'm single parent now too as the illness fibro so they say took that from me too, though his moved back in for the moment as i cant cope not even with carers coming in, i'm hoping he will come back for good as if he doesnt i really dont think i can go on but know i will for my kids.

Funny cause we dont treat animals like this do we? i saw my mum suffer through cancer and although my is not terminal i do think it cruel sometimes the pain people have to endure, yet i guess it builds us into stronger people.

Sam xx

[doni54]

Yes, one way or the other........one or the other of us is going to cross the pond!!!!  Won't that be wonderful!!!

Beth is fine and doesn't have to go back for 6 months.  I owe it all to everyone for all their wonderful prayers.

Yes, going to the neuro on the 20th.  Excited and scared all at the same time.  Hope he's not one we will have to put on the bond fire........heeheehee

Sleep well, my friend.

Love & Hugs
doni

[uk2]

Thanks hun, have such love for you hun, even though we have never met you are my family and we are an important part of this net family too its amazing its been that long and finaly things seem to be moving on for both of us praise god!!

there have been times i have shed tears in my prayersand you are always in my thoughts and prayers and my one big aim when i am well enough is come visit you!! i promise might take me years but i'll do it!!!

Have you heard from the neuro for a appointment yet? and did your daughter get her results back i prayed so hard about that mine came back clear, thank god!!

anyway very tired off to bed now well i'm in bed lol but i'm coming off here.

lots of love sam x

[doni54]

This is wonderful news, honey.  Sounds like things finally have a chance to improve.  It's been a long 15 months, since we both first found this forum, huh?

Give Carl a huge hug from me and tell him again that I am very proud of him.  You know I'll keep praying, I've never stopped.

Always here for you, and so happy that you are back here on this forum, so we can all wrap you in love, and help you get through all that is happening with you.

Love & Hugs
doni

[uk2]

Hi

Already wrtian this once and it went into cyber space so annoying not got no energy to write much now.

Thank you all for your comments they mean so much to me i am choked by the care of you all and feel truely loved.

i went to my pain clinic assesment which was for 45 mins but they clearly saw by the time i got there that i could never do a 8 week course for 2 hrs a week in a classroom setting, so they have refered for a input ressidential pain treatment for 3 weeks in a hospital so i get physio, my meds sorted and hydro and counciling as i am sucidal at times, she agreed with the type of meds i'm on that i need a councilor to help with the mental effects of the drugs and pain.

help at last wont be for a couple of mths as there a waiting list.

social services and young carer association are involved and am stopping my 3 carers a day and getting a p.a like lan suggested and then i can get out and have them keep the house in order.

i am now just searching for a proffesional physio to help me with my myofascial pain syndrome which is commen in fibro and is why some of the drugs just are not working they treat it through triggar point massage and triggar point injections, and also a councilor to come to my house and improve my mental state.

i feel slightly hopeful, and my husband is officially moving back in  yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! thank god as i clearly cant cope and i pray it will work out.

thank you all again for your thoughts and prayers they have lifted me up.

love sam

[tiffany515]

Whatever you do, do not lose your faith!  Try to build it any way possible.  You said that it is sad the pain we have to endure..........Actually, if you enough faith, we don't HAVE to endure it, because Jesus already did it for us.  I am trying to heed my own advice on this..........I still have alot of pain, but praying really does help.  So does worship and praise, and having others pray for you.  It is really hard to achieve the amount of faith it takes to heal us, but it is definitely worth the effort.  I will pray for you and your kids, and you do the same!  
Much love,
Tiffany

[Lulu54]

Hi Sam,
Let me pop in and introduce myself because I am fairly new here - and was just  dx'd in September.  I see from your bio you have been here for a long time.  Obviously you are well loved and respected, judging from the outpouring of support from these wonderful women.  I hope to have the opportunity to know you better , but even more I hope the pain clinic people give you some real help and not just words and a sore bum from sitting in chairs.

My best wishes to you, Lulu

[Quixotic1]

You deserve so much better, including adequate pain relef.  You see here, Sam, how deeply we all care about you.  I truly hope that your husband will be able to deal with your illness and return to you and your kids.  I hope that he just needed more time to know what he truly wants from life and from his own actions.

We hold you as tenderly as we can.  You can say anything to us - anytime.  I hope that ILADVOCATE gave you a resource that you didn't know about.

Virtual hugs, my dear,

Quix

[young at heart]

SAM,

SWEETIE IT IS SO GOOD TO HEAR FROM YOU,SORRY IT'S UNDER THESE CIRCUMSTANCES.

MY PAIN MANAGEMENT DR. DISMISSED ME AND FEELS MY NEURO IS HANDLING THE PAIN.

SPASMS ARE RELENTLESS AND IT DOESN'T SEEM MEDS LIKE TO HELP MUCH WHEN THEY REACH A CERTAIN  DEGREE OF PAIN.

I HAVE STARTED SOME PHYSICAL THERAPY,THAT PUT ME DOWN FOR A FEW DAYS,THE SPASMS WERE OUT OF CONTROL.

MY DR. DID PRESCRIBE A TENS UNIT AND I MUST SAY IT DID PROVIDE RELEIF TODAY.I GET TO CONTROL THE IMPULSES AND I CAN USE IT AS OFTEN AS NEEDED.I'M PRAYING IT WILL GIVE ME THE RELEIF MUCH NEEDED AFTER ALL THESE MONTHS.

I WISH I HAD MORE TO OFFER,PLEASE AS PAINFUL AS IT MAY BE PLEASE TRY TO KEEP THE SPASMATIC AREAS STRETCHED,IT DOES HELP.

I UNDERSTAND ABOUT BEING DOWN,WISH I HAD MORE TO OFFER,SENDING YA GENTLE HUGS AND PRAYERS

T-LYNN

[Wobbly]

it's nice to hear from you...sorry, your not feeling well, we miss you here and it's nice to see you checking in and letting us know how you are.  

we are here for you friend... and understand what you are going through.  Hope you get some relief for this pain soon.  

take care and remember we are here for you to chat or vent ...whatever you want...
Hugs...
wobbly
undx

[uk2]

Thank you all for your words, i just needed to vent, feel like i'm going mad and so frustrated by my restriction.

I want to push pass the pain but i cant, but i cant rot in bed forever and now kids home will have to pull it together till carer get here.

I want to get in my car and drive, take my dog for a walk, be full of enegry when the kids  come home and welcome them cook for me and them!!

I want to walk round the shops and buy presents instead of on line.

I could get out but none of my friends are free to take me out so rely on my husband (separated ) who has been amazing recently.

I live in a small village not in a town there is nothing here except a petrol garage, so even if i got the carer to get my scooter out there would be nowhere to go. I'm trying to get transfered into another village where my kids go to school and they have more there and my friends live there but its impossible to get in there.

I know i have to keep positive and set short goals but its hard got a pain clinic assesment friday feel like that is the end of the line really its like we cant help you so we are going to teach you to live with your pain LOL and the thing is you have to get there!! and sit for 3 hrs on hard chairs while listening to somebody fit and well of course how to cope with the pain while i'll be half dying from sitting in a chair that long its crazy!! going to bring that up at the assesment.

anyway best go before world war 3 breaks out with kids.

Thank you all so much for your support

It means so much to me

sam xx

[ILADVOCATE]

I had discussed in the other post the concept of applying for a home attendant. That could help you maintain some degree of independence. I didn't realize you lived in the United Kingdom so let me put the link to the independent living center there because they could help you apply for that (if you can't get there physically call them, they still can give you information by phone) and that would be a big start. I know I am applying for one and its very helpful for independence and mobility and self sufficiency:
http://www.bcodp.org.uk/projects/index.shtml

[pennst8r]

Where better to come to moan??? We all know how you feel, and are all here to hold you up and send you all the hugs and prayers you can handle. Sending them your way....

Take good care

Penn

[doni54]

Oh, sweetheart, it is so good that you are coming here again.  We will help you through this, I promise.  You know how I feel about you and how precious you are to me.

I've prayed everyday for months now that you get some relief.  I know that God will answer my prayers and I'm praying now that it will be soon.  

I am so glad that Carl is stepping up, you tell him for me, that I am proud of him.

You know I love you and am always here, but I think you need this forum family to wrap their loving arms around you just as Shelly has said.  This place, as you know, does wonders for your heart and head.  I think you need to be here so we can all help you get through this.  I am so happy you now have a way to communicate even when you are bedridden.

With much love and hugs..................
doni

[sllowe]

Sam  - I cannot take away that pain, or the bad dreams the meds cause, but I know you have your faith and I wanted you to know that I'm here briefly this a.m. reading this, sending all the thoughts and prayers I can that you receive gods gifts asap!

I'm specifically asking that this comes your way right away! It's not greedy to do so.

I want the rest of our members to wrap their loving arms and healing thoughts around you as there are power in numbers!  

Please join me family and do this please - Sam, I hope you feel this,
((((((healing painfree hugs)))))
Shell