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398059 tn?1447945633

Frustration

Being that I have MS I am being disallowed from donating a kidney.  They say anyone who is healthy can donate.

They ask if we have friends.  How does one ask for a kidney from a friend?
10 Responses
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338416 tn?1420045702
Yay on the kidneys being a little better!  My mom-in-law had a problem with her kidneys - turned out to be an auto-immune process.  The kidneys were being rejected by her body.  She had to go on organ transplant drugs to convince her body that the kidneys belonged there.  Crazy.
Helpful - 0
398059 tn?1447945633
The kidney thing for the moment is on hold.  My wifes blood levels had improve to be slightly above the levels where she could receive a transplant dialysis.

The news is good in that her kidney is function a little better.  The problem is that they are only functioning better enough not allow her to receive certain drugs or dialysis or a transplant.  The thing is that she is gets tired, irritable, and in need of plenty of emotional support.

Until her blood levels drop again, which is most likely, we deal with her situation as us.  We prefer she does not need the transplant or dialysis and we hope her kidney function returns to normal.
Helpful - 0
572651 tn?1530999357
Are we talking about your wife?  I'm sorry the health situation has deteriorated to this point.

I have seen news stories about people waiting for kidneys to generate interest.  I have also received emails at work from someone needing a kidney for a friend.  I think desperate times call for desperate measures and anything goes when it comes to saving a life.  

Also, there have been changes to blood donor policies and they will accept the blood of people with MS, even with all the drugs we are on.  I have given blood since I was dx'd.

good luck with moving forward,
Lulu  
Helpful - 0
1318483 tn?1318347182

That is a really good idea, JJ.  Maybe different businesses locally would be willing to hang a sign or flyer up about it, too....

Addi
Helpful - 0
987762 tn?1671273328
COMMUNITY LEADER
I thought it was more to do with the recovery, infection and the overall risk is too high for an MSer, not the organ or blood etc being the problem. Have I got that wrong?

About asking friends, would it be out of place to write a letter to all explaining the need for a transplant? Maybe explaining that one of the first steps in finding a match, is to contact family and friends, if you would like to be involved please contact XXXXXX etc.

I wouldn't give your number because it could be uncomfortable and awkward for people, other than giving that a go, i;m not sure how you'd go about asking people.

Goodluck!

JJ
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I think you just need to be honest to friends and family that you would love to donate but are excluded from donating because of MS and say now you must rely on a non-related donor and explain how the non-related donor works. I have read about donor chains here in Canada. My mom's Friend had a kidney transplant about 5 yrs ago because of polycystic kidney disease. Give friends the information and let them process it. What about other more distant family?  In my mom's friend's case her brother who she was estranged from for 20 years got tested and was a perfect match and he stepped up and volunteered.  She had sent him a letter or something telling him she was gravely ill.

Then I think you must pray that someone feels the call to help if they can.  I don't believe in asking people straight out as it is such a big decision, but I feel some people are called from God to step up if they can.  I have friends who look like they would make good donors, but then when you deep dive they have there own issues that make it not an option (eg. a friend has a condition where a general anesthetic can be extremely dangerous as a type of reaction runs in the family).  

Helpful - 0
338416 tn?1420045702
That's tough - they tell me I can't donate blood either, because of the MS.  What gets me - how do they know?  I mean, I'd rather have a working kidney, even if I got MS from it.
Helpful - 0
559187 tn?1330782856
I have already wished you a happy birthday yesterday on every medium available.  I hope it was a good one and again hope that this coming year will be awesome as far as health and happiness.

Love ya.

Julie
Helpful - 0
1394601 tn?1328032308
My friend has had two kidney transplants.  Both were given by strangers.  The first one he waited about six months.  The second less than two.  There is hope.
Helpful - 0
1318483 tn?1318347182

You sound like you are smack in the middle of a traumatic situation.  I am so sorry for that.  

I do know that this is a subject I have often wondered about.  I am listed as an organ donor.  With all the drugs I take and my medical issues, I have thought about whether I will be denied the honor of being able to give one of the greatest gifts a person can give.  

As for asking friends.  I have no clue.  That would be incredibly hard, I would imagine.  Maybe just explaining everything that is going on with the person needing the kidney.  Then tell them that they are looking for anyone who matches and leave it up to that person?

I don't know.  Because I would want to be bold and straightforward with my friends and just ask them point blank.  

I wish you luck with your friends and hope that your family is embracing each other during this most unfortunate time in your lives.  

Hugs,
Addi
Helpful - 0
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