addiction & withdrawing

Hi,

I have known for awhile that i am addicted to methodone and would have to deal with it at some point. My problem is I may have to do it sooner than I want to.  

My primary dr, is new to me and I dont think he really believes anything I say, but I have told him I am going to  the MS clinic at UCSF and ihe is familiar with my cardiologist who totally believes I have MS or at least one of the other neuro diseases.  If I  didnt have that information to fall back on i would be out of luck probably.  But he is insistant that I need to get off of the methodone asap. This was all he was concerned about.  

I know he is correct in what he says but I really wish he understood where I am coming from in regards to MS,   Its a very difficult time for me right now. Withdrawing is not an easy thing to go thru and I am aware of that.

I have two more test at UCSF on Feb 2nd , visual evoked potentials and the lumbar puncture.  That puts me very close to a dx..not sure what will happen however but I have been waiting for these two tests.

If anyone has can give me their opinions, please do.

hugs, meg

[WarKitten2008]

Hi Meg

Nice to meet you!  Im sorry you are going threw this. I know the withdrawl (withdrawal)
part can be very hard.  But, just know that it will pass and there is a light
at the end of the tunnel.
I was on a pain patch some years ago before my back surgeries, it was only
for a few months,  some days I would forget to put the patch on at the correct time
(a couple hours late) and I would start to feel very sick.   Myself and my doc
finally figured out that my body had become addictied to this pain patch, and
I had to go off right away.    the following week to week and a half was so not fun.

I guess you could say I had a crash course in how sneaky this med was about
being addicting.  I had no clue that was happening to me.   I have never been
addicted to anything (excep smoking)  and that just came out of left field.

after the fist couple of days off it they gave me vicodin to help relieve some of
the withdrawl (withdrawal)  symptoms. which really helped.  then once better I stoppen
the vicodin as well.
I wont use pain patches any longer as I dont have any controle on only taking
pain killer as I need it.
I now use darvocet only.  AND only as needed, when I just cant take the pain
any longer.
Boy back then I had no clue that the body could become addicted like that
with out the minds knowledge.    
I hope this wont be to hard on you, I just wanted to make sure you knew that
there are things that they can use to help you threw those withdrawl (withdrawal) side affects
if you need them.
Be well soon.                               Warkitten 2008

[Lulu54]

Dear Meg,
Obviously you are dealing with a problem here that is so complex we can't give you answers.  But here is my thinking, muddled as it is.....

you know you have a problem with  addiction because of your treatment with methadone.  I don't remember why you started the methadone - if it was for pain management in place of morphine or if it was an addiction to another drug.  Neither of that matters now.  

Does your GP feel that the methadone in your system will obstruct the results of your MS tests in some way and interfere with getting clear answers?  Or is he merely concerned that it is time to wean you off of the methadone?  

Coming off of something that has helped, you and knowing that it is difficult to do because of the addiction, has to be terrifying.  But you also know that anything planned right, supported by proper medical help, and surrounding yourself with positive people can be accomplished and you can drop this methadone too when the time is right for you.  

Like I said in the beginning, I don't have any answers, just random thoughts.  You know you have lots of friendly listeners here to help you talk this through.

feel better, Lu

[essdipity]

Lulu is right, this is such a difficult subject, and I don't know of people on this forum with that kind of expertise.

What I do suggest is that you try the addictions forum at MedHelp, and any of the others that you think may relate. I know there are MedHelp members who can answer your questions and help you deal with your doctors, so please seek them out.

Hang in there and let us know how it goes.

ess

[biowham]

Meg, if you're not already, in addition to the excellent advice you've already received, I'd also suggest getting involved with a recovery support group. Those folks have walked this walk, and they're knowledgeable and caring people who know exactly what you're going through. SF has got a ton of groups, so you should look into it. The fear alone can be daunting, and they can help you with that.

Good good luck.

Bio

[doni54]

Hi Meg,

I'm sorry you are going through this and having to deal with trying to get a dx for your symptoms.

Everyone has given you good suggestions, and I wish you the best of luck with this and with getting your dx.

Take care and don't hesitate to talk to us as you are going through all this.

doni

[meg321]

Thanks for all the advice , my dr is new and that was the first thing he caught, so he is taking care of it first I guess. He seems to know not too much about me or MS.  I didnt really like his atitude but we will see.  I originally took the methodone to get off ther pain pills.  

I am actually a sober alkie and drug addict, but have been clean and sober for 34 yrs but its been a long time now.  

I took only 2 pills this morning and i have not had a problrm yet today.  I am feeling very good about this today and it always helps to talk about it.

thanks, meg

[biowham]

Meg, congratulations on your 34 years. That's just amazing.

Bio

[meg321]

Thank you sweetie !!

[meg321]

I am not doing too badly on my own right now, i have gone from 3 plls in am and pm to 2 pills in the am and 2 in the pm....

thats not bad !!

meg

[ShadowsSister]

Hi, I am a devoted "Friend of Bill W.", for those who don't know who "Bill W. is, he is one of the men who started AA many decades ago.
Meg, I have also been clean & sober for 23 Years. My AA  birthday Dec.19Th 1985. I was given the DX of MS forty days almost to the minute, of getting sober.
The reason I am sharing this with you is so you know I really do understand.
I am gathering your Dr.'s are working with you while you are withdrawing from Methodone.
You should Never try this on your own. Have you been using Methodone all these years as pain management, or because of the addictions.? I ask because the answer couild make a difference in how you need to deal with this.
Meg anythime you use drugs for long term pain management, even if you aren't emotionaly addicted you will be physically addicted. If you only take the allowed amount and on days when possible you take less, than you haven't broken away from the "program"
( I have a morphine pump)
We are slowly lowering the dose amount to get me ready for surgery to repair the pump line. I am using oral morphine to deal with the pain and also to ward off any extream withdrawals.
I hope you are working with your AA friends while you are going through this, remember we are Never cured from our addictions, and through out our lives, at different cross roads we find ourselves needing the 'Program". All any of us have is Today... Yesterday is gone and Tomorrow hasn't arrived yet. I know you know all of this after 35 years of Clean & Sober living. But I know myself, some times I need some one to remind me.
I will keep you in my Prayers and if you need or want to, you may send me a personal message, you are also invited to read my journals if you want to.
Please let me know how you are doing? I am very concerned for you, it is Never easy to removes drugs from our systems.. I hope it is a least asmall help to know you aren't a lone.. THIS IS ONE OF THE BEST SUPPORT GROUPS " BAR-NONE"
{{{~!~}}} these are my hugs that I send out,they are carried to you on winds...

[sllowe]

Ladies, you are both so inspiring!

It's wonderful how we can share our ups, and our downs together - proof we really are all family and the love runs deep here.

Meg, we are here for you honey, and pulling for you as you work this one out.

I hope you get a better MD one of these days. I need me one too - one that knows me a bit, and MS and one who will care about daily challenges.
Love,
Shell

[meg321]

Just wanted to report that I have been cutting back on my methodone pills and am down to 1 1/2 a day now.. so I am doing good now.  It was not too bad the way Ihave done it, with the DRs help.  Its an awful drug and and stays in your system..actually it gets into your bone marrow.  Its a synthetic heroine.

Its tough and did not want to stay on it.

THanks for all your responses

hugs, meg

[PastorDan]

Meg, we'll keep you in our prayers.  Quitting cigarettes was among the hardest things I ever did, and I still attribute that to Divine intervention, as well as way more Nicorette than the labels allow.  I know that you know that you will never be alone in this process, so if you ever feel that you are, reach out.

[ShadowsSister]

There are programs out there that might be able to give you the support you need at his time... I have a feeling you might know the ones I am thinking about. I will keep you in my prayers, right now the most important thing is to be totally honest with your self and at least one other person. I hope you make it, but we never make it on our own so reach out for the support you need and it will be there...
Hugs on the winds from me to you{{{~!~}}}

[LLWB]

You are in my prayers. Hang in there, and know the there is always One who will give you peace and strength.All you have to do is ask. And He forgives us all our weaknesses.

Hugs & Prayers

[uk2]

Meg nad all

so touched by your honesty, i was addictated to class A drugs most of my teenage and early twenties it was only when i became pregnant did i stop and change my llife who knows where i would of eneded up if not i had reached cocaine already thank God i never reached anything else.

I have been on fentannal pain patches there stronger then morphine and are an opioid narcotic drug and i went on them as i was in so much pain i went from 25 to 100 and chnage every 72 hrs i saw here that one of the posts said when she was late putting it on she felt ill so do i i notice the need to change my patch before its time to change it, is that bad?? i have come off all my other drugs as they were not working clonazapam lyrica (lost 2 st when i came off that) and requip (parkinson drug) still coming off that but i dread giving up my patches as i feel they really help.

meg well done, we are all behind you.

sam

[meg321]

I never even expected anyone to see this post.  What a great bunch you are !!  I most definitely know where my help comes from and sometimes I am connected to Him thru all of you when I am in a bad place.  

I think if we need something to keep us comfortable or help with pain, we cetainly should take what is necessary.  I am not one to suffer too much.  We just all need to know our own bodies and know whats good for us.  The methodone is not. a good drug, it snuck in under the radar. I should ave known better but when i am in pain i don't always think well.

I love all of you and am so grateful you are here me and others...

hugs, meg