cognitive overload

It's me, Willowwoman. Couldn't figure out my combination of user and pw, so had to sign up all over again. Sorry it's been a while. I had the flu shot and it put me into a major exacerbation. My neuro told me it was from the swine vaccine being put in this year. Anyway, my question is this - I don't do well in crowds with lots of noise..like Walmart at Christmas. Does anyone else have this problem? My husband is dragging me kicking and screaming 6 1/2 hours away to see his son play football. I told him I'll sit in the car if I have to because it is family weekend and I know I can't handle that big crowd being crammed into the bleachers. Any suggestions how to handle this other than screaming at him because he doesn't think and/or care about what I have to deal with from  the MS?

[Guitar_grrrl]

Hey, Willow!  Sorry for your troubles with the PW, etc.

Don't scream at him, or otherwise bite his head off (even if he might deserve it...lol), but DO tell him calmly and firmly you can't handle the crowds and the noise, and you won't be able to attend the game.  Perhaps a celebratory dinner afterward would be easier?  Just a thought...

[Hepsibah]

I've explained it to him thousands of times..it doesn't matter to him..it's not his problem as long as his needs are met. He is a master manipulator. Problem is..what the heck do I do while he's at the game? I've got nowhere to go, car won't fit my scooter, I can't get a nap..he is SELFISH SELFISH SELFISH. There..now that I've thrown my tantrum, I do feel a little bit better. Thank you. :)

[rendean]

What you are experiencing is what what my neuro calls too much sensory input which can cause dizziness or other neurological symptoms. For  instance , I recently went to a party . Between re joining old friendships and being in a strange environment my  nystagamus returned and I became nauseated and disoriented.

Same experienced on the expressway. I am not allowed to drive during rush hour traffic but I am allowed to drive. Rush hour is too much sensory input. Don't know that this will change your DH's attitude but it is at least a medical fact.

Hope things improve,
Ren

[Starryeyes2]

I completely relate. My husband and I went to a college football game last weekend. We had to tailgate for 3 hrs before the game which included a lot of walking, yelling and too old men acting like they were still in college.

Altho my guy parked in handicapped for me, I had to walk down many steps on super shaky legs and walk across the length of the arena to our seat, which was also down more steps. The entire time I was fuming and told him I wouldn't be accompanying him to anymore sporting events.

I don't feel that he really considered my disability. He wanted to be close to the field at any cost. The entire time, I worry about if I need to use the bathroom, how will I get back up the steps trying to fight the crowds.

I was exhausted for days afterward. His team lost which made his mood even worse. It was supposed to be his bday wknd but I just don't have it anymore where I can do all the walking.

Reality bites. I truly wish I wasnt the one who can't do something. It's depressing. They act like they understand but the minute they have to make a concession, the weather changes.

I hope your hubby starts to understand that you aren't trying to be difficult, we are affected by so many things.

Hugs
Kristi

[sllowe]

Hello! Willow!

Is there no way to get out of this? I would not be able to do it. Like Ren says about that sensory overload - there is nothing shaking it. I doubt you'll be able to get him to understand that it's both good and bad stimulation that in intolerable :(  I couldn't even listen to people laughing when I had that.

Hope you can get out of it and don't feel badly about it.
-Shell

[Hepsibah]

Thank you all for your support. I can't get out of it. I threw a fit last night and this morning told him I'm over my tantrum. He asked me what it's going to cost him. I told him nothing, but I'm getting myself new clothes and a tablet!!! I think I'm going to putz around on the campus - bookstore, cafeteria, etc. and bring my new tablet..lol

[maxthecat9196]

I have the same problems.  If there is too much going on, I can't even always hear/understand what people are saying.  We travel so my husband can give religious talks to different congregations- not every week, but at least every month.  I love that I can be a support to him, but when the entire congregation comes over to say hello to me, I cannot usually even understand them.  It's a lot of happy noise, but by the time we even get there, I am almost ready to pass out.  Then when people are speaking to me, it doesn't even sound like intelligible language to me.  

Not sure how to manage it though- because he really needs my moral support to be able to serve this way.  

Tammy

[jensequitur]

Try earplugs!  It's a wonderful way of keeping too much input from overloading you.  I had a couple of years when I couldn't be in a Walmart, because the lights made me feel crazy.  I still have problems when I'm in a store with a certain kind of cooler, because the vibrations (probably below the level of my hearing) make me feel very strange and discombobulated.