ANOTHER POLL SEEKING YOUR HELP!

What to do?!

I feel as if I should quit trying to quit!

I am in a rut and I cannot seem to get out of it. I just keep digging myself deeper and deeper!

I need to quit smoking and I need to lose weight. It is not as if a seriously morbidly obese smoker can pick the lesser of two evils. Being overweight and smoking are extremely dangerous to my health. Both can produce deadly consequences.

I was progressing well with my weight loss; then I tried to quit smoking. In a matter of three days I have managed to gain back most of the weight I have lost in three weeks. I understand the fluctuation of water in my body but it is not all water. I have made some seriously bad choices of amounts and unacceptable food.  My choices range from greasy rolled tacos smothered in guacamole, enormous amounts of sushi, deep fried Chinese food (egg rolls, prawns, crab & cream cheese stuffed wontons), lard laden refried beans and rice, virtually one pound tacos engorged with shredded beef and lard.

I have practically stopped eating fruit and now I am craving simple carbohydrates: rice, pasta, bread, and tortillas.

When I find myself doing well at not smoking; I am usually in the refrigerator or the pantry looking for something quick and fattening or loaded with simple carbohydrates.

My blood pressure has gone down but I am positive my cholesterol has skyrocketed into the deadly range! My triglycerides and LDLs are scouring my veins causing, most likely, irreversible damage; or at least building a thick wall of sludge.

My glucose is climbing at an average rate of 6 points.

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0%

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I HAVE HAD A SIMILAR Medical experiance!

0%

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I I have been treated badly by medical prosessionals.

0%

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I have quality care provided by my physicans.

50%

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I don't believe my doctors listen to me and how I know my body.

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I am one with my body, I study the different effects my body has for all sorts of reasons.

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I don't believe my doctor has my best intrest in mind when prescribing me medications.

50%

 (1) 

I believe that I am not being told all of the information reguarding medications.

0%

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I wild try homeopathic alternatives to modern medicine.

2 Members voted

[StarsWeight]

My life is stressful because of financial debt that I must start paying in 6 months.

Lou is getting unhappy with me because I can’t seem to get focused and stay focused! I am letting him down in so many ways. I am not taking care of him as a good wife should be taking care of the man that provides everything. I want or need for nothing! He is so patient with me but I still feel as if I am letting him down!

I know I am letting myself down in the worst ways!

[StarsWeight]

I am starting to blow situations out of proportion as if I have become, suddenly, bipolar! I am not but I am acting as if I were.

I feel overwhelmed by everything I have to do and I just can’t seem to get motivated to do them.  I would like to concentrate on one thing at a time but I feel as if I cannot possibly get anything done if I just try to do one thing. Eventually I don’t get anything done and I make all the wrong choices in every aspect of my life; including smoking, eating, exercising, and mundane chores around the house!  

[StarsWeight]

Every day I do not get things accomplished puts me further back in reaching any of my goals.

I need to make one choice and stick with it but I am not sure of which one to make.
1. Should I quit smoking?
2. Should I control my eating (choices/amounts)?
3. Should I exercise more?
4. Should I clean my house?
5. Should I sleep?
6. Should I look for a job?
7. Should I finish gifts I have started to make, that are long overdue?
8. Should I try to do everything?

I have people(family, friends, professionals) all around me suggesting many different approaches I should take. I appreciate the helpfulness and concern. I take all suggestions into consideration. I weigh the benefits and come out with so many that it is overwhelming!
I worry that if I take on one challenge I will neglect the other things that need to be done as well, and I will get discouraged and discontented with the choice I have made then stop doing everything again!

[StarsWeight]

I don’t understand why my life has become so complicated, why my choices are so hard now. Before, I was able to do EVERYTHING, effectively and efficiently. Now I am just a bumbling mess of misconstrued judgments.

I have panic attacks easily. The attacks consist of gasping for breath; sever chest pains, and racing heart rate! I had them occasionally when I was with my ex-husband and my life sucked; working up to four jobs at a time just to make my monthly bills of $2500, while my ex sat around the house and played video games and cheated on me! Not only did I take care of the finances and the upkeep of the house,  I also took care of my ex’s two children and my sister’s three youngest children.  (I started a divorce in March 2004, although our marriage had been over a couple of years before that.)

The severity of my panic attacks reached a high, uncontrollable state, when my Uncle was diagnosed with lung cancer, July 2008. He had been with me off and on for 7 years, fighting alcoholism; I was his care provider when the doctor put him on hospice. After his death, six weeks after diagnosis, I had severe panic attacks, and barley made it through my second to last semester of college. As of now I still cannot remember most of the semester. It took me about four months to consider going back to school to acquire my final degree. I must not have finished grieving properly or attended to my panic attacks thoroughly; before going back to school. I thought I was fine, although sad; I managed to get back into the swing of school duties. Two months into the final semester I started getting awful chest pains. I was having hard times breathing and would get dizzy every time I got up from a sitting position.  I was accustomed to the chest pains and breathing issues; I knew what they were and I figured I could beat them on my own. The thing that scared me was the dizziness, I would almost pass out. I didn’t understand and was growing to consult my doctor for it. When I finally made an appointment for the doctor I; I tried to explain about the panic attacks and chest pain and that I knew exactly what was causing that and the treatment I needed to get them under control but I was concerned about the dizziness.  I felt as she was not listening to me. I told her that Ativan would ease the panic attacks because I was put on them when my uncle passed away. I feel I made the mistake of telling her I had a hard time quitting the ativan. Once she heard that she refused to give them to me and prescribed Prozac. I was up set that she insisted on telling me that I had other problems. She was concerned that I was going to have a heart attack. Yes I was 315 pounds and having chest pain and breathing problems but I felt they were not connected to my heart, stress of dealing with uncle’s death and trying to finish college. She insisted that I go to the hospital to have my heart checked. Reluctantly I did.  When I arrived at Enole I had severe chest pains due to the anxiety of being in the same hospital my uncle had recently died in; they were increasing every moment I was there. The entire time waiting; I was thinking I was just having a panic attack. The doctors gave me pain medication but never addressed the panic. The panic kept the chest pain coming back; more severe than before. It was getting hard for me to breath and I felt as if my chest was going to collapse into my lungs. I kept insisting to the many doctors that came in to evaluate me that I was having and anxiety attack and not a heart attack. The doctors continued treating me as if I were a morbidly obese heart patient. This was very frustrating! I finally succumbed to the pain medicines being injected into my IV. I was still having the breathing difficulty but the chest pain lessened.

The doctors decided to keep me overnight and have a stress test performed on me in the morning. I was nervous about that. When they finally transported me to the room where the test was going to take place I felt as if I were in some kind of futuristic, space aged lab with; giant machines clunking, clanging, rolling and spinning in all different directions.

The technician came out to prepare me for my test by injecting me with some solution that can be only handled in a stainless steel injection devise. That sent shivers up my spine and created an instant panic attack! What on earth would he be putting into my body that can only be house and handled in stainless steel! Many things ran through my mind while I was waiting to be put on the monitors. when the RN came to put me on the machine I was ready to get this over with and go back to my room. The nurses were wonderful with me even though they could see the fear enveloping my body. When the first test started I felt my heart rate increase with every second. My chest began to hurt increasing with every second that was counted down, the nursed tried to calm me down but the pain was unbearable!  I began to cry from the pain; I felt as if my heart was going to explode all over their beautiful hospital walls. When the procedure was finished the pain had began to go away. I believe they gave me some pain medication but I can’t remember.
Now I had to wait for my turn in the noisy, metal monster! When the man put me in it and started the monster rolling, swinging, and moaning. I was starting to feel pain again. He was giving numbers for the nurses to enter and you could hear in their voices that something was wrong. I just laid there and thought, “Lovely, all of this torture for a simple panic attack.” I just wanted to go home and sleep.

Finally the stress test was over and they wheeled me into my room and shortly after that a cardiologist came in to tell me he was going to give me a cardio catheter! “What is that?” I replied. He explained that he would be making a tiny incision into my groin to my main artery that leads to my heart. He would follow that vain to see if there were blockages in my arteries.

After that test I was given a clean bill of health for my heart! When I finally got back to my room after the procedure I was ready to go home. One nurse came in and told me that I needed to keep my leg striaight for about 3 hours, another nurse came in and told me I needed to keep it straight for about 2 hours, within 15 minutes of that comment I fell asleep; when I woke up I was curled up in a ball with my knees up to my abdomen. The nurse came back in about an hour after that and said I don’t have to keep my leg straight anymore. I told her I don’t even think I kept it straight for 15 minutes. She said that it would be ok. I took her professional word for it! No pressure was ever applied to the incision location!

About an hour  after the procedure I had the “Mother” of all headaches, I have never felt pain like that in my life, not even when I broke my leg, broke 6 ribs, or had reconstructive surgery on my right forearm, and shoulder.  All I could do was cover my head with my pillow and cry.

[Dazon50]

Bless your heart...you have so much passion inside your heart :-)

It seems hard now and we have times when it seems we are pavement with lots of rubber laid down.  Being honest and keeping on doing what you can do daily is the "ho-hum" of everyday life, but one in which will eventually yield good results if the direction is pointed towards the good :-)))

I think of that mountain and how unless I fly up there to the top, I have to take it one step at a time.

:-)))
Best wishes in keeping on keeping on!!!!!  Work, effort...hard (yields results besides being just plain tuckered out) :-)))