Am I a terrible person?

[moonpiixie]

Hi everyone. My name is Anna, I am sixteen years old. I suffer from ocd, and it's pretty severe. It's to the point where I can't eat or drink because my mind tells me it's wrong, that if I do it makes me a bad person, that it has a secret bad meaning and that it is not me drinking a drink or taking a bite of my food, it is me doing something unspeakable. It makes it really hard. Everything I do feels wrong. Every time I look at someone, I have violated them. I get terrible, terrible thoughts, and I don't want to think about any of it. I hate it. Also, the worst part is is that I get these fake memories- or at least I think they are fake. I hope they are. They feel fuzzy most of the time, and I can't tell if they're real or not or what actually happened, because it's stuff I would never do but it feels real. They pop in out of nowhere. They pop in years or months after it would have "happened" and I seriously have never thought about any of these things before they popped into my mind. Out of ******* nowhere. Like, if I had done something terrible, I feel like I would never have forgot it. There is so much more to my ocd, but I will keep it short for now. I really want help because I am tired of feeling like a terrible person. I want to be  happy and I want to get better but I feel like I don't deserve it.

[JGF25]

Hi Anna.  Have you been formally diagnosed with OCD?  Have you seen a psychologist and/or psychiatrist for it?