Am I dealing with HOCD?

[Zdlb2000]

Hi, I'm a 15 year old and I've been dealing with intrusive thoughts for about a year,though mainly homosexual thoughts there have been sacrilegious thoughts also,(I'm a Christian), when I  was younger I never liked guys, only girls. These thoughts absolutely disgust me and drive me insane, I had what I think was a anxiety or panic attack a couple of weeks ago, I felt like I was losing my mind, even thoughts of suicide came into my head. These homosexual thoughts are mainly sexual, I don't know of what had might of started them. I have talked to my priest at my parish 2 times about this. These thoughts occur everyday,when I wake up to when I can finally fall asleep. I have had a porn problem since I was 11. I do guess I had a "homosexual experience" when I was younger, I really didn't know what gay or straight was at that time, but I tried to stick a dildo up my butt, which I am ashamed of and disgusted by. Other than that nothing, I have always been straight, but these thoughts make me think I am gay or bisexual and they make me think I will become gay or bisexual, which I would never do as I want to marry a woman and have a family when I get older. These thoughts weren't as bad as when I was in school last year, but when summer came around and I had nothing really to do, they came like wildfire. Now that school has started back, I hope they will progress downwards and eventually just stop. But do I have HOCD and I've to trusted websites and I have looked at the symptoms and it seems like I might have it but I would like a opinion of someone who has had it, but I know I'm gay or bisexual, I don't want to do anything with a guy. Thanks everyone who answers.

[Zdlb2000]

I know, I'm planning on seeing my school counselor.

[123tushar07]

It looks like hocd but only a psychiatrist/psychologist  can diagnose you

[Zdlb2000]

I also forgot to mention I have never watched gay porngraphy, I have watched lesbian porn before and was turned on by it.