Drunk and obsessed over sex possibility

[angel973]

Hi everyone. I was a severe case of hypochondria and hiv anxiety always. I am in love with a guy and planning to get married. from last one year I had been feeling much better and stopped getting obsessive thoughts. I have lock, gas stove ocd too. Few days back I went to meet my startup friend and he gave a treat because he got funding. I had 3 beer glasses and pretty much remember the whole conversation. It was all about the company, dreams and families.

After the third glass i felt little out but i still remember i said no to pizza and going to another pub or going to his place.

I pretty much remember the bill also. then next flash i hv is that I am on bike and reached my place. coming down from the pub is what i can't recall. in 60 minutes i finished a drink and came home also. Because I love my current partner a lot i m scared of cheating and possibility of having sex with the frnd i met there. I have no memories of sex at all. not even a kiss. I asked him also and he denied doing nayhting clearly.

I am still worried. My clothes, body and everything was proper with no signs of physical intimacy at all.

Help.

[JGF25]

Yeah,,,,you need to stop bothering him.  Asking him 50 times is not going to change his answer and obviously you don't believe him anyway because of your disorder.  You really should see a psychologist.  Can you do that?

[angel973]

I know it's impossible but the thought is stuck. How to accept the reality and tell my brain? I have asked my friend hundred times and poor fellow swears on god always and says nothing happened at all.

[JGF25]

I doubt very much that you had sex with this guy.  Plus when people are drunk, sex doesn't really go very well.  I would think if you did have sex you would have some sort of vaginal area pain if you did have sex with him.  But that is a moot point, because you remember the night and it didn't happen.  

[angel973]

Thanks for your response. You are correct I am conservative in thoughts i feel and have guilt that i met him and roamed on bike. Should i worry about the sex? can i hv sex and just dont remeber the sex part?

[JGF25]

It is all a mind game.  You remember the night therefore you didn't black out.  Guilt and doubt are a big part of OCD.  perhaps one or both is playing a role here.  Even though he is just a friend, maybe you felt some sort of guilt meeting up with him.  And of course doubt plagues everybody with OCD.