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Fear of being pregnant
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Fear of being pregnant

Ive been having anxiety about being pregnant..it gets to the point where i make myself sick..its all i think about. I start to feel pregnant with most of the symptoms.. i took at least 10 pregnancy tests and all negative and even got my period and i still think im pregnant. I fear the pregnancy process, and not wanting to be pregnant at this time...i try to live my life with no stress..but this has become an issue for me

I was diagnosed with OCD a couple of years ago

I have a few things that i have to do and if i dont do it i go crazy
How can i help myself calm down without medication...I feel so sick...its getting bad :( :(
Can a doctor prescribe me something for my paranoia and anxiety :(
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41 Comments Post a Comment
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Avatar_n_tn
I have the same exact condition as you...however, the part that makes it 20x worse for me is that I cause so much stress for myself that I end up not getting my period sometimes. Like now for example, I am 3 days late and I am contemplating how I would hide my abortion, where I would hide, etc. This obsession is driving me insane..I feel like a psychopath and my best friend recommends I see a doctor. All I can tell you is that you're not alone...however, I will be soon..considering no guy will want this baggage and I will never be in a long term relationship with this disgusting psychotic mindset.
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Avatar_f_tn
i def. know what your going through.  I obsess about getting pregnant. I have to do little things that if i dont do i think that is going to def make me prgnant.  I will think about it for hours, thinking about how am going to hide and abortion. Even when i get my   period, right when its over i think im pregnant again.        
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1049259_tn?1295092078
HOLY COW! i am just like you! every month I get panic attacks because of the thought of being pregnant, I feel dizzy and faint and I don't think i have ocd, the though has been on my mind since my boyfriend and I use no form of prevention. I am 3 days late now, tired, sore breasts, feel sick and I know this isnt in my head so tonight I will take my first ever pt lets hope it is ng so I can go on the pill and force him to use condoms and pullout. I don't think I want any of this right now either. though I dont think I am prenant after af comes, it is pretty impossable with a normal flow. LOL! however I do feel like I want to have kids, just not want to go through this bs of ruining your body
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Avatar_n_tn
I have the exact same problem! I had sex for the first time in October and have had my period every month since then but I am obsessed with the idea of being pregnant! I get really severe PMS so every month before my period I feel like all the symptons are from pregnancy. I've taken 4 urine tests (2 at the doctors office) and still cannot get it out of my head that I could be! I constantly am looking stuff up on the internet to try and convince myself that I am not but then just end up becoming more frightened that I am. This is horrible!  I honestly do not think I will feel better until its 9 months from the date I had sex and a baby does not pop out. If anything though, I learned that I will never have sex with someone again until I am in a great relationship and know the person is someone I would be ok with having a child with because half of the reason for my stress is that I do not love the person I did it with and we aren't even dating.
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Avatar_f_tn
Hi im 29 years old and just been married. My obsession with this same problem is ruining my marriage. My husband says Im not affectionate and we dont have sex exspecially being newly weds. My problems is, is that he already has a daughter which we share custody with his ex. Everytime we get her back there something wrong with her. This last week she came back with a cold, ear ache, and lice. So Ive come to the conclusion that I relate sex with becoming pregnant and relate his child to health problems. I have been on birth control for 6 years. I was diagnosed with severe anxiety about 2 years ago which I have now traded with OCD, which I take out on my home, cleaning, disenfecting, sweeping up to 15 times daily. I do enjoy sex when I have it but its not enough for my husband. Can someone help me?
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Avatar_f_tn
I am the same as all of you! I have been in a great relationship with a great guy for a while. But since we started having sex I totally freak myself out. I know there is no reason to because we use a condom every time and he pulls out before he gets off anyways. But this is killing the both of us. I ruin it for him afterwards because I am freaking out and I can't even enjoy the sex because of the anxiety. And even now we hardly mess around because of my on going fear that his pre-come Will somehow get in me. I'm so scared and nothing helps!!!
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Avatar_f_tn
Hi, I've just been reading your above comments and I can't begin to explain what a relief it is that I'm not the only one with this fear. Your descriptions of how you all feel almost made me cry. I am 29 with a beautiful 7 year old son, who I wouldn't change for the world, but my over powering fear of falling pregnant is ruining my life. It all started 4 years ago. My partner and I had a whoopsie, I wasn't on the pill at the time for health reasons. I took the morning after pill, but what followed was 3 weeks of excruciating anxiety that I was going to be pregnant. I didn't eat, couldn't sleep or function and spent the whole time in what felt like another world. I would do 3-4 pregnancy tests a day. I too came on but didn't believe it was real. Even doing tests whilst bleeding. I was prescribed with seroxat and after a while I began to feel almost normal.
I also was given the mini pill which I took religiously. Still in the back of mind the fear was there though. A few months later it returned with a vengeance as if it had been growing in my mind, waiting to explode. Again the persistent testing began, the googling everything and convincing myself I was pregnant. Obviously I wasn't but it never stopped the voice in my head. I began seeing a psychotherapist who diagnosed me with OCD. It seems whenever this fear arises is usually during a really uncertain time in my life that I have no control over, and I become fixated on the whole pregnancy thing. I think at this point it may be worth adding. After I had my son I fell pregnant again only a few months after. This has to have been the most devastating time in my life. I was already suffering with severe post natal depression and it couldn't have come at a worse time. My partner and I decided in the end that I just couldn't go through with it. I needed to concentrate on getting better and looking after my baby boy.
It is now 4 years down the line. After a year of therapy and a almost a year of no problems. It's once again bk. I'm still on the mini pill, which has a 3 hr grace window. For the first time in a long long time I took it late last Saturday night by 3hrs 20 mins. I even doubled up when I did take it. The doc said 20 minutes..I would be seriously unlucky for anything to have happened on that time. I just can get out of my head that my partner n I (of 10 yrs slept together the day before. I must add in all this he has been fantastic always stood by me even when I couldn't let him anywhere near me. I have been having pain in my pelvic region these past few days and have managed to convince myself its implantation bleeding and ice ruined my life. I just hope this passes again just like it has done time and time again in the past.
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Avatar_f_tn
Hi all, the posts here are old but i have read them all now since it is now that i have found myself into a situation exactly the same as all of u. it is really crippling. my OCD is killing me. i had a sexual encounter with my boyfriend on jan 12 2013. he did not penetrate me at all, neither did he ejaculate, but i just cannot stop worrying about a pregnancy. i have had three normal periods after that and home pregnancy test turned out to be negative too. all the time i keep checking myself for symptoms and i actually believe i have many of the symptoms. i keep pressing my abdomen to palpate a mass so that i know if my uterus is enlarging. and sometimes i actually feel like my tummy is getting big. i keep searching the internet for explanations and stuff and waste so much of my time on it. it goes away when i have my period but just as it ends i start worrying again. i end up having panic attacks, worrying how i would hide it, and what if it gets too late for an abortion, what would happen etc.

did anybody here felt exactly like me, like actually having symptoms?? i am badly in distress.
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Avatar_f_tn
And i also read on the internet that some women continue to have menses in pregnancy which is very wrong according to the doctors i consulted, but it added to my worries.
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1699033_tn?1405352675
Doubt is a big part of OCD and the increased anxiety can lead you to start feeling ill.  It weakens your immune system.  Also, the checking you are doing is perpetuating the problem and making the thought stay around.  You really should see a psychologist at this point.  You have had your period for months...you cannot be pregnant especially since there was no penetration or ejaculation.  Think about seeing somebody please.  
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Avatar_f_tn
Thanx for the advice. and for the reassurance that i cant be pregnant. but this need for reassurance of mine is itself a part of OCD. i dont know where to go and whom to talk to and my boyfriend and i broke up a while ago too. and i am scared of disclosing it to anybody, even a psychologist.
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Avatar_f_tn
besides all this, these days i keep feeling that my tummy is heavy, i have alot of flatulence and bloating but that has always been my problem. its only now that i have started feeling that my tummy is heavy. and i feel uncomfortable all day long. is it all in my head? i also have severe PMS symptoms that start long before my period which adds to the misery since i start thinking of them as pregnancy symptoms :(
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1699033_tn?1405352675
First let me reassure you that a psychologists have heard it all and then some. You cannot surprise them with anything you would say. When nixie try is high our bodies can actually exhibit the symptoms you are looking for. Your immune system is weakened and what would ordinarily be nothing to you, you are keying in on it and making it into something it isn't. You really should think long and hard about seeing a therapist. I know how bad OCD can get and honestly without therapy I would be a basket case.
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Avatar_f_tn
so i should be sure that i am not pregnant and is should stop checking? i am also experiencing frequent urination for about three days now. this has triggered the worry again.
at first i kept thinking this is not an obsession you have in OCD, i thought OCD is all about the obsessions with germs and order and sexuality etc.all of which i already have. its now that i have realized that its a part of OCD too.

I will see a therapist really soon. thankyou so much :)
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Avatar_f_tn
and what do you mean by nixie try?
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1699033_tn?1405352675
Oops...typo...it is "anxiety".  If you already tested and it is negative then you are negative and the problem is OCD doubt and anxiety.  Obviously you wouldn't want to be pregnant with a baby from a guy you are no longer with thus the added anxiety.  I really think you are fine and that you just need a bit of outside help to get a handle on the OCD.  
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Avatar_f_tn
thanx alot. i am seriously planning to get help as i am crippled because of this anxiety.
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Avatar_f_tn
and how reliable are the home pregnancy tests? i got the dipstrip, not even midstream. i mean the one you dip in the urine and hold for a few minutes so that it can rise up and all.
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1699033_tn?1405352675
Taking the dip stick negative and your three normal periods...I can't help but say you cannot be pregnant especially from no penetration and no ejaculation.  You are definitely in high gear with your OCD and so you do need to get some help.  There is a book called The OCD Workbook:  Your Guide to Breaking Free of OCD.  You can go on Amazon and get a "look inside" to see if you think it would be helpful for you.  Let me know what you think.
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Avatar_f_tn
ok let me see that
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Avatar_f_tn
i saw the book. it looks great. i am too drained of energy right now from checking and rechecking the internet for reassurance that i might not be pregnant. i keep thinking the test could be a false negative
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Avatar_f_tn
i know i sound stupid saying the same things to u over and over again. but today i am really helpless. i am sorry for this
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1699033_tn?1405352675
Did you read my post " anatomy of a horrific thought"? Your checking and rechecking the Internet is in that cycle in my post and that is part of the reason you can't move on. Stop checking and you will feel better. Go get a book and busy your mind to stop the thoughts
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Avatar_f_tn
ok, i am definitely going to try to stop this checking besides i am going to talk to a therapist today. thankyou so much for ur help
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Avatar_f_tn
OMG I myself have been feeling exactly like you.  I can't stop searching internet.  It also happened in January and it is now May.  Wow....I haven't gained a single lb.  I've have had four negative pregnancy tests.  I got my period in Feb, March and April.  Now I am freaking out that I am not going to start in May.  I am even feeling like my stomach is feeling bigger and really seems like I feel something moving.  I am freaking out!!!! What has helped you thru this?
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Avatar_f_tn
hey, i know i m responding very late, i have been away, just saw your post. i am undergoing medicinal therapy now, atleast i can sleep well with the benzodiazepines they are giving me. the rest isnt going very well. i have had my 5th period since the sexual encounter and i still freak out at times, thinking about a pregnancy. its terrible. but the frequency of these thoughts had decreased. my therapist says whenever a thought strikes, i should engage myself in some other activity like watching a movie, talking to a friend, studying or cooking. it helps, but to be honest i still keep checking my tummy and look for symptoms. the anxiety is debilitating at times.
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1699033_tn?1405352675
Distraction is a good technique. Are you learning other CBT techniques such as controlled breathing? Or visual imagery such as imagining a red handle and pulling it toward you and saying STOP in your head? There are many techniques and IMO they go hand in hand with medication.
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Avatar_f_tn
My therapist did not tell me any such thing. and i havent seen her in a long time now. i have been better though, trying on my own. but it has come back i guess. i m feeling terrible again
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1699033_tn?1405352675
Then consider seeking out a therapist this time who does teach cognitive behavioral therapy.  I think it will help you immensely.  You are probably under more stress than normal right now and that is why it is back.  
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Avatar_f_tn
do you think OCD strikes back with stress? i have noticed that it bothers me more when i m depressed over something else or if i am generally not feeling very good about everything.
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1699033_tn?1405352675
HELL YES!!!!  Stress is NOT an OCD person's friend.  That is why it is so crucial to have some tools that you can use to help yourself.  Self-coaching, controlled breathing, journaling, etc.  
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Avatar_f_tn
right. i am such a mess right now. i dont know what it is but i feel some movements in my tummy, sudden movements. and that forces me into thinking that maybe i m pregnant GOD FORBID. it has been seven months now, seven! and i m still not over it.
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Avatar_f_tn
what added to my misery was a news report that a woman found out that she was pregnant only when she went into labor. she was a marathon runner and a mother of two already. how is it possible that she never came to know of her pregnancy? i have normal periods, every month i have them, i took a pregnancy test in feb, after it happened, negative. what should i do now?
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480448_tn?1403547723
You need to stick with the therapy and meds.  What kinds of meds are you on?  You mentioned a benzo, are you also on an antidepressant?  If so, they take time to work, and sometimes you may need a higher dose (which means more time). If not, I would ask your doc about it.  Are you seeing a psychiatrist for the meds?  If not, I recommend that, versus your family doctor.

Therapy is cruicial.  OCD isn't curable, it's a condition you have to manage.  It can be managed, but it's important that you keep working on it until your anxiety is tolerable and you're not still plagued with these thoughts all the time.  I would suggest finding a therapist who is well versed in CBT if possible, and picking up some books to read about OCD.  The one JGF mentioned is a perfect one to start with.  Those series of workbooks are great, they are actually a lot like textbooks, with exercises and all sorts of tools to use.

You must try very hard not to give into the "checking" urges, no internet searches about people not knowing they're pregnant, or getting pregnant from a toilet seat, etc.  Also, any checking you're doing on your body needs to stop too, feeling your tummy, examining yourself, taking pregnancy tests, any of that.  It's hard at first because the compulsions are what an OCD sufferer turns to to help decrease the anxiety, but unfortunately those compulsions make the anxiety worse in the long run.  You MUST try not to give into those urges.

Good luck to you!
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Avatar_f_tn
thankyou so much for the advice, i have been on an antidepressant too, escitalopram. but i discontinued the drug because of the side effects and drowsiness that lasts all day long. i am trying not to check myself or the internet but sometimes i get so scared that i start doing it. i know it worsens the anxiety. i am trying.
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Avatar_m_tn
i am having the exact same fear.
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Avatar_m_tn
is there an email i can reach you on so that i dont put details out publicly?
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Avatar_m_tn
Ohmygosh . ive been taking a lot of pregnancy tests and theyre always negative.i have my period normally. But I still freak out! I try to decide between suicide and obsessively googling ways to hide it or detect it or get rid of it and this is taking over my life.. the worst part is that he never even came in me. he pulled out wayyy before on both of the ties we had it unprotected. im on the pill. and the 3 other times we used condoms and they never broke or got holes or anything.. ohmygosh I just wanna know for sure and feel okay again!!
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Avatar_m_tn
I feel exactly the same... as you. I had all kind of checks, over 10 pregnancy tests at home, 2 at the doctors' place - all negative; i have my period every month and I even had a routine check at the gynecologist and she made a trans vaginal ultrasound to check for some ovary problem...which is probably the biggest prove and still i am so worried i might be pregnant! it's getting so bad.. now i'm sure im just making up all my symptoms and i know it can't be possible especially since the gyn examination but still i'm still so scared. i don't know what to do. i think i'm just crazy, i keep worrying about it all the time and feeling bad. i'm afraid to tell to people, cause it's just ridiculous and crazy....! and yeah it's getting bad because of checking for what seem to be incredible stories of people giving birth without knowing..
How did you overcome this, it's been already more than 4 months now with my obsession since i had my fist sexual experience.. i don't know what to do about it!
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Avatar_m_tn
All of these posts are old but reading them makes me feel a little less crazy knowing there are people who feel the exact same way I do. Pregnancy is biggest fear. Ive been diagnosed with OCD and anxiety and take medication for it. I know if i wasn't on the meds the pregnancy anxiety would be much worse but it is still present. I find myself always buying tests whenever I go grocery shopping, even if i haven't had sex recently. If I run out of tests I have to go get more, for the constant fear that I will be pregnant and not know it. I had sex about 3 weeks ago and have taken a test every day since that night, all of them negative. We didn't use protection but he did not ejaculate in me, and I'm on birth control. But I find myself worrying about precum, and what if my birth control is not working for some reason. I have the arm implant birth control so I get my period once every three months, which honestly makes my anxiety worse. Ive spent so much money on tests and time worrying, I just hope one day I will get through this.
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Avatar_f_tn
Oh my gosh. There are people going through the same thing that I am going through. Suddenly I don't feel as alone - although I am sorry for your suffering and wish that this awful anxiety and terrible panic didn't happen to you guys as well!

My boyfriend, whom I haven't seen in about 1.5 months and haven't had sex with for about 7 weeks, had sex frequently, but I was always on oral contraceptives and he used the pull-out method religiously and also condoms (although not as intensely). Yet I can't shake the thought that I'm pregnant. I've taken two at-home tests (both negative) and even had a period, but the fact that the period was a little lighter and different from what it had been like before is driving me crazy. But I do get the feeling that if even everything showed that I'm not pregnant, I would still be afraid... it's really terrifying!
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