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I was wondering if this happens to anybody else?

Lately I've been finding that as soon as my brain says "what if you weren't thinking of HOCD" then I immediately question my memory, and feel as if I can't remember whether I was, meaning the feelings were real and this causes a lot of anxiety. Is it another trick?
Best Answer
1699033 tn?1514113133
When you have anxiety about something it is both in your conscious and subconscious. That is why so many of us wake up with panic. So while you may not think it is bothering you or you feel you are not actively thinking about something..it is still there until you get closure on the thought.
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1699033 tn?1514113133
Smiling at a text????? No Sophie....that does not mean you are gay it just means that you are stuck in the cycle of irrational thinking and you need to find a way out of it.  I'm sure I've given you suggestions in previous posts.  
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Avatar universal
I read somewhere that a girl realized that she liked her friend because when she text, it would make her smile. 
I just started working with a girl, about 2 weeks now and we get on fine. She text me and normally the HOCD is on my mind 24/7, but it was kind of forgotten I guess, anyway I found myself with a slight smile when she text. My next thought was about what I had read, then I couldn't blame it on the HOCD because it wasn't 'on my mind' when it happened. Does this make me a lesbian? Is it a sign I liked her and didn't notice? 
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1699033 tn?1514113133
It is just you overanalyzing everything.  Your mind is stuck.  
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Avatar universal


I'm trying really hard to move past my problems. I wondering something, if you're not thinking about the HOCD, if you've temporarily forgotten about it, and yet you still get symptoms that you look for (for example, I read something where a girl realised she was in love with her friend when her text messages made her smile, my friend texted me and I found myself smiling, yet I'm not sure if I was thinking about the HOCD)aren't they real feelings? Because the HOCD isn't controlling your mind? I hope you understand what I mean. Thank you.
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1699033 tn?1514113133
You Are spending too much time analyzing everything. You are no different than the others with HOCD. It is a mind game...do not test and do not let the thought get any farther than what if...stop it with self coaching..yell at yourself if you have to..."NO..I'm not going there anymore" if you let it keep going you won't get out of the cycle.
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Avatar universal
I just can't move on from this panic. As far as I can see, there are no stories similar to mine, which makes me panic more. Each time I think "yes it's a trick", my mind says, "what if that split second is the real you, and the HOCD is just a cover up". It's exhausting. I was wondering, if you have moments where you're not concentrating on your thoughts, are they still there? For example, I was looking at a man and as per there was the loss of attraction and the HOCD was on my mind, but  I lost concentration as this has become almost normal now, and I can't remember if I was thinking of the HOCD for a moment, does the thought carry on even if you lose concentration?
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Avatar universal
So, does that mean even when I'm not thinkinh about it, it can happen?
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1699033 tn?1514113133
The subconscious is not an OCD persons friend. It is working all the time.  I have had out of the blue panic attacks in situations when I feel good and that is because anxiety is lurking in my subconscious.
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Avatar universal
Hi, sorry to bother you again.
I've been wondering about this, do you have to be concsiously thinking of the HOCD for the thoughts/feelings to take place? Or are they so lodged into the subconsious that they happen without us realising?
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1699033 tn?1514113133
Yes, this is just another trick your mind is perpetrating on you.  Look at my "anatomy of a horrific thought" post and you will see how the thought process works and why we get stuck.
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Avatar universal
Help?
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