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OCD- My fear of death/morality?
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OCD- My fear of death/morality?

I am an 18 year old female from Minnesota. I never really had any obsessive thoughts as a child, or any compulsions.
My grandma died when I was 13, my cousin(same age as me) died in 2009, My aunt died a few days before christmas 2009, My other cousin(a year younger) died spring 2010, my stepbrother also died in spring 2010, and my friend Casey just died 2 weeks ago in a car accident.
After all these deaths, I started obsessing.
I am afraid of driving because i can't control anyone else on the road. And when I do drive, I get worried that if I don't drive perfectly in the lines, I will kill everyone, including myself, in a car accident.
I am starting to lose trust in my closest friends just because when they drive, they seem very carefree, and I am afraid that they are going to crash and kill me.
I am also afraid of sleeping in my bedroom.
when I am in my bedroom, I constantly check my 2 windows to make sure I am alone, and I sleep with the lights on.
If I don't do these things, I fear that something bad will happen, like a ghost will haunt me, or that I will never wake up.
This anxiety is driving me crazy, and I keep trying to convince myself that this isnt OCD, and that these arent Anxiety issues because I don't want to see a therapist.

Are there any home remedies to anxiety?
Does Yoga help with anxiety?
Can you just ignore OCD and make it go away?
Can people get over OCD on their own? or do you always need the help of a therapist/medication?
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Avatar_f_tn
Every disorder, disease is hard to beat. I know many including myself that have something that we are OCD about, one forgets that he/she already ate so therefore they have to lesson how much they eat by only buying a little at a time like a day's worth of food. Seemed to work, the person didnt eat himself sick any more, and went down to a healthy weight. Some fear someone coming into their home so they check the locks like me. What I used to do, after what I witnessed and gone through in my life if one only knew they would truly understand why me fear was present, still is but to lesser degree I used to check the door about 30-60 times during the day, afternoon and night. Now if I happen to pass by it or i I know so and so was over I'll check the locks and about 1-2 times a night. As time goes by in your life, depending on what you see, hear. I suggest stop watching the news, dont read a paper, pick up a non crime and non drama book, your school books if you still go to school. Maybe you like romance, or a funny fiction novel. Find something that works.to put your imagination into a good place. Yoga and meditation help if you can just close your eyes listen to some music, feel the breath going in and out of your body. If you can visualize something that is calming to you, maybe you like the beach, in your mind picture the nice calming relaxing waves. ANd you on the beach catching some warm rays. Depening on how good you are at imagining maybe add the illusion of birds in the back ground. Depending on how this makes you feel, is when it would be a good time to do this from then on. If it relaxes you to sleep, do this at night, if it calms and wakes up your brain * in good way, but you cant sleep then do this in morning, to get you back into your car, your freedom. If you can stand Enya music buy a cd it's a small investiment, Or if you like a certian animal try to find a solitude tape with those sounds in it. I got enya and a loon call with loons, wolves water and frogs.  but if you can master your fear it's alot nicer than medication and it should give you something that should last longer without the huge cost of meds. I dont know if you have done a journal, I'd suggest it, even if it sounds kidish who cares. But every day if there is someone that calms your nerves or maybe there is a scent that made you feel calm or happy right it down. Maybe there was something nice that happened and didnt hurt you write it down. This will help you to find a comfy peaceful enviroment where you more likely like to visualize. Or even hang out in. I dont think your crazy. My grade 9 drama teacher taught me yoga/meditation mixed into one. I have found it to calm my mind in school so I could consentrate on my school work insted of my horrid family life. My grades even got better since the time of starting this. If the music is what keeps you up try it without the music. Ive done it both ways, but at night dont involve fast big movements, focus on small gentle movements. The more exercise you get the more your brain and body wakes up. I have had so many fears that I obsessed about, and I agree it is hard to master control of your feelings in certian situations. I so know that! But if you press on it, try to think of something else, even if it's for a few seconds, once that is accomplished try a few minutes thinking of something else happy nice thoughts. Things that made you happy, maybe  a boyfriend, or was it your 16th birthday was there a crush at your bday? Dont have to answer anything to me. Just think about it, and find out, use it to help control your thought of the grave events that took away your peace and happiness and possibly sleep. I dont know if my email will come up. I know you dont know me, but I have helped out so many times for so many people, I keep their names quiet if they want me to. I helped out in groups sessions, so many wanted to commit suicide so I helped them come up with other ideas.Good non suicidal ideas, Ive worked with Bipolar people, OCD like I said earlier, depression sufferers, killers, druggies, Ive worked with woman that were in bad living situations that threatened their life, I helped them figure out a safety plan, and how to get the news to someone that could help further. you name it I know it. Im not a shrink, but I am better than one, lots of shrinks read books, I live, I hear I see ive gone through ALOT. Ive gone through organizations that could help me safely plan thats how I know. I can try my best to help you find something safe that can work for you. my email is a-***@**** You dont have to email me, but if you think I can help then I dont mine takeing my time off to help someone in need. Even me just being a shoulder is what works or a pair of ears or eyes I will help in that way, I wont ask your address nor your phone number. You can take your time I wont rush you, if not comfortable I will not take offense. Please I know it's hard, Ive been in those many places in life. I cried out for someone to help me and mostly got on deaf ears.
Related Discussions
Avatar_f_tn
Every disorder, disease is hard to beat. I know many including myself that have something that we are OCD about, one forgets that he/she already ate so therefore they have to lesson how much they eat by only buying a little at a time like a day's worth of food. Seemed to work, the person didnt eat himself sick any more, and went down to a healthy weight. Some fear someone coming into their home so they check the locks like me. What I used to do, after what I witnessed and gone through in my life if one only knew they would truly understand why me fear was present, still is but to lesser degree I used to check the door about 30-60 times during the day, afternoon and night. Now if I happen to pass by it or i I know so and so was over I'll check the locks and about 1-2 times a night. As time goes by in your life, depending on what you see, hear. I suggest stop watching the news, dont read a paper, pick up a non crime and non drama book, your school books if you still go to school. Maybe you like romance, or a funny fiction novel. Find something that works.to put your imagination into a good place. Yoga and meditation help if you can just close your eyes listen to some music, feel the breath going in and out of your body. If you can visualize something that is calming to you, maybe you like the beach, in your mind picture the nice calming relaxing waves. ANd you on the beach catching some warm rays. Depening on how good you are at imagining maybe add the illusion of birds in the back ground. Depending on how this makes you feel, is when it would be a good time to do this from then on. If it relaxes you to sleep, do this at night, if it calms and wakes up your brain * in good way, but you cant sleep then do this in morning, to get you back into your car, your freedom. If you can stand Enya music buy a cd it's a small investiment, Or if you like a certian animal try to find a solitude tape with those sounds in it. I got enya and a loon call with loons, wolves water and frogs.  but if you can master your fear it's alot nicer than medication and it should give you something that should last longer without the huge cost of meds. I dont know if you have done a journal, I'd suggest it, even if it sounds kidish who cares. But every day if there is someone that calms your nerves or maybe there is a scent that made you feel calm or happy right it down. Maybe there was something nice that happened and didnt hurt you write it down. This will help you to find a comfy peaceful enviroment where you more likely like to visualize. Or even hang out in. I dont think your crazy. My grade 9 drama teacher taught me yoga/meditation mixed into one. I have found it to calm my mind in school so I could consentrate on my school work insted of my horrid family life. My grades even got better since the time of starting this. If the music is what keeps you up try it without the music. Ive done it both ways, but at night dont involve fast big movements, focus on small gentle movements. The more exercise you get the more your brain and body wakes up. I have had so many fears that I obsessed about, and I agree it is hard to master control of your feelings in certian situations. I so know that! But if you press on it, try to think of something else, even if it's for a few seconds, once that is accomplished try a few minutes thinking of something else happy nice thoughts. Things that made you happy, maybe  a boyfriend, or was it your 16th birthday was there a crush at your bday? Dont have to answer anything to me. Just think about it, and find out, use it to help control your thought of the grave events that took away your peace and happiness and possibly sleep. I dont know if my email will come up. I know you dont know me, but I have helped out so many times for so many people, I keep their names quiet if they want me to. I helped out in groups sessions, so many wanted to commit suicide so I helped them come up with other ideas.Good non suicidal ideas, Ive worked with Bipolar people, OCD like I said earlier, depression sufferers, killers, druggies, Ive worked with woman that were in bad living situations that threatened their life, I helped them figure out a safety plan, and how to get the news to someone that could help further. you name it I know it. Im not a shrink, but I am better than one, lots of shrinks read books, I live, I hear I see ive gone through ALOT. Ive gone through organizations that could help me safely plan thats how I know. I can try my best to help you find something safe that can work for you. my email is a-***@**** You dont have to email me, but if you think I can help then I dont mine takeing my time off to help someone in need. Even me just being a shoulder is what works or a pair of ears or eyes I will help in that way, I wont ask your address nor your phone number. You can take your time I wont rush you, if not comfortable I will not take offense. Please I know it's hard, Ive been in those many places in life. I cried out for someone to help me and mostly got on deaf ears.
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