I was doing so well until now :( I was wondering if this has happened to anybody else?
I struggled with HOCD years ago, and now it's come beack with vengeance. I keep remembering old spikes, I remember one about a certain female celebrity, and thinking "did I feel something for her last year"? was I attracted to her?" of course, this original thought was almost five years ago, and now it makes it impossible to disprove :( what do I do? Has this happened to anybody else?
Ideally what you need to focus on is the fact that you got over it years ago and since you got over it before you can do it again. It is kind of like me having panic attacks in the car. If I start to worry I will have one and say to myself "bring it on, I can handle it" it doesn't happen. I have taken the fear out of it. It wasn't real for you then and it certainly isn't real for you now. Try some self-coaching and fall back on those past positive experiences.
Replacing those negative thoughts with positive ones is one self-coaching technique which is basically what I do in the car and what I wrote above.
Sometimes you have to yell at yourself, in your head obviously. When you start to think about it you say "ENOUGH, I'M NOT GOING THERE, NOW MOVE ON!" This tends to jar me into action.
Also, breathing helps for the panic becasue basically what you are doing is hyperventilating. So you take a deep breath in through your nose, hold it for five seconds and count this out in your head, then let it all out through your mouth. You do this until the panic has subsided and your heart rate has slowed back down. You can do this breathing technique in any situation and nobody will even know you are doing it. Give it some practice first while laying down with your hands on your stomach. I use this in the car sometimes as well if the panic gets the better of me. But lately, I have gotten the better of it!
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