Such bad ocd I can't sleep most nights

[May44]

and I'm constantly googling to help ease my mind but it just makes things worse. My biggest  ocd fears are catching a disease. Hiv, hepatitis b and c are my main worries.

Thing is I actually have what I consider a real exposure to hep. C, I feel like I caused this to myself because I worry so much that the universe has given me something to worry about. I had a friend insist on giving me a makeover, we are like sisters so I went for it, she has a friend who I'm cool with but she's really more her friend than mine. She borrowed the girls mascara to use on me. I wasn't comfortable with this since I don't know the girl nearly as much but I didn't want to hurt her feelings (stupid I know). Not long after my makeup was done I,washed it off

Later we found out the girl has hep c!! I can't think of anything else, I can't sleep and everyday I google for hours, the stuff I read online only makes things worst. Common sense tells me I can't catch it that way but I still am panicked and depressed. I don't know how to get pass this. I know next week it will be something else. It never ends

[yhyhyhyh]

J

[May44]

Oh and two days ago I was obsessed with hiv because I bought some socks and one of the socks had a stain that looked like blood, I don't want to get into it to much because I may pick that one up again but let's just say it was hours of panicking. I tend to move on only when another incident happens and I obsess about that. Its never ending.