As you can tell from the site the majority of the posts are regarding HOCD so that in itself should make you feel better because you are not alone. HOCD is a very real disorder. What I do want to ask is that you take the time to read some of the other posts. While I want to help everyone, I feel like a broken record sometimes with my responses. I wish I could come up with something new to say but I think I have said it all. This does not go away by itself. There are tools you need to learn to help yourself and those tools come from a psychologist who teaches CBT. So please help yourself by taking that first essential step and make an appointment because overanalyzing, testing, etc. are doing more harm than good and since you and I both know that we cannot simply "turn the thoughts off" you need to get that professional help.
I'm here and I will be reading the posts but please take the time to read other's posts. Thank you. JGF