i have a tendancy to clean all day every day. it controls my life. causes friction with my partner, my kids cant move, i crack up if toys are layng about. its not fair to those that live with me but i just cant help it. ill hoover and mop 2 to 3 times a day. by evening am xhausted. iv no time for friends or hobbies. my fiance trys to help to lighten the load as we have 4 kids but i just critise what he does and go over it. everything has to be in its place or else theres hell to pay. things that annoy me probably wouldnt get to any1 else but i cud cry at times with frustration. like if the kids dont tidy up toys, my partner leaves his under wear drawer open [LIKE WHY? JUST CLOSE IT] clothes on the floor when the washing baskets right there. it ok mummy slave will lift it shes not busy today. is that what they think.i cant stand anyone making toast as i know there will be crumbs everywhere and they dont butter it on a plate like i would to prevent the mess. anyone reading this must think am crazy. but this is how i live. i went to my dr who said id ocd and gave me tablets which dont work. any ideas how i can loosen up and stop this controlling my life
i know exactly how you feel sister, iv been the same way for years my husband cant fold the towels right , make the bed right , it is terrible i know i drive my family crazy and i dont know how to stop, with time and meds mayb i can CHILL OUT . hang in there you are not alone
Hi and welcome to the OCD forum. You mentioned "tablets" what are they and how often do you take them?
This is not something that goes away over night. It will take some time but you can get past this. Cleaning is a big one for OCD. Everything in its place and nice and clean. Well, that isn't reality but you can't get your brain to realize that. The "C" in OCD should also stand for control. We like to have control. Nobody can do it as good as we can. They can try to help all they want but it's never going to be good enough so after a while they just stop trying.
The good news is that this is treatable. You might not like what has to be done but I'm going to give you just a little bit of an idea. You say you vacuum all the time. What you have to do is the next time you feel the need to vacuum, you have to stop yourself. You need to walk away. If you hoover 3 times a day then try to only do it 2 times a day. Then 1 time a day, then 1 time every other day, etc. The same goes for everything else.
Is the doctor you are seeing a psychologist or a general doctor? What you really need to learn is cognitive behavioral therapy which the above is a part of. Also, you need help dealing with the anxiety that is caused when you don't give into the compulsion to clean. There is also the medication route. You can cross that road later if you need to. But at this point, i think you really do need outside professional help with behavior mod. Anything that takes up the entire day, day in and day out, is a problem not just for you but for your family members. They are not going to understand because they are not feeling what you feel when things are out of order. We can't ask them to. When you go to treatment, just tell your family to help you out with their patience because it is going to take a while before you break this habit. Compulsions are habits and habits can be broken.
HI AND THANK YOU FOR YOUR REPLY. THANK GOD SOMEONE GETS ME i hear what your saying about minimisen the hoovering bit by bit but i just couldnt do it id freak out and get sooooooo wound up. iv tried b4 it didnt work. the answer to your questions are yes it just a gp i see and the tablets were flouxitine anti depressants which have someting in them to help anxiety. am of depressed mind also. i feel it for those who live with me as am terribly annoying. barking orders 24/7 do this do that dont do this put that away lift that clean that. am even bleaching the toilet after my kids use it.
So the GP has you on the equivalent of Prozac. For your OCD, it may require a dose on the higher end. But really, the GP is not the best person for you to be seeing. The dosage you are on is obviously not working. If you want the medication route, then you need to see a psychiatrist. They can manage the meds and they are much better at it than the GPs. Lastly, you really do need to learn the CBT so that would require a psychologist because most psychiatrists don't teach CBT. If I were you, I would start with the psychiatrist and get the meds straightened out. ONce that happens you may have better success on minimizing your cleaning. They can also, along with you, decide what the next step is. I think that you will agree that things cannot continue the way they are for your sanity and for the sanity of your family. You have been proactive in getting to the GP, now you need to take it a step further.
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