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paranoid I have been in denial my whole life or haven't known
I am paranoid I am now becoming lesbian or bi. I have never been interested in girls, and have always known I want to meet a guy and fall in love. I've had crushes on men my whole life and never doubted my sexuality. For months I've had obsessive thoughts where my mind comes up with all the reasons I've been in denial my whole life or didn't know I was gay. I can't get lesbian thoughts out of my mind, and they cause me so much pain in stress. I also need to check myself for arousal when I see girls on social media. I (only as of this week) get a nervous feeling in my chest when I see girls or their bodies. This feeling has never happened before. I'm scared now my whole future will be ruined, I seriously don't want to be with girls but my mind tells me I'm in denial when I know I'm not. I go to sleep scared I'll have a dream about a girl, only once did I have a lesbian dream and it causes me so much stress. I know I like guys, I flirt with them, I get crushes on them, etc.
With your past history...why do you think this thought is any different than the disease thought? It isn't. When you have OCD or obsessive thinking, you will go from thought to thought. What treatment have you had for obsessive irrational thinking?
2 Comments
No treatment, my parents think if I just be less anxious I don't need a treatment, they don't take it seriously. Usually this obsessive thing happens during summers or breaks when I'm isolated from people. Any recommendations for treatment at home?
Books are not as good as a real life psychologist teaching you cognitive behavioral therapy but here are some books
Overcoming OCD.... by Christine Purdon
Self-Coachng by Joseph Luciani
mindfulness and meditation videos on YouTube
Exercise
What people without OCD don't realize is that telling us to "just stop thinking" is the most unhelpful thing they can say. They don't realize that if we could stop we would. Why would we torture ourselves if we could just stop?. This is a real disorder that doesn't go away. It needs to be managed.
Overcoming OCD.... by Christine Purdon
Self-Coachng by Joseph Luciani
mindfulness and meditation videos on YouTube
Exercise
What people without OCD don't realize is that telling us to "just stop thinking" is the most unhelpful thing they can say. They don't realize that if we could stop we would. Why would we torture ourselves if we could just stop?. This is a real disorder that doesn't go away. It needs to be managed.
Just wanted to mention, I also have a past of severe anxiety where I convince myself I have a disease and then get tested and I don't.
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