How patient should a patient be??

I went to see my primary on 6/19 and asked him about me seeing a gyn/onc. He didn't seem to think I needed to go to one, but as I persisted, he said he'd "see what he could do" about me getting to one at Yale. I could tell he was NOT HAPPY.

I was to bring the paper out to the secretary/nurse person and tell her that he would explain what she was to do. I told her that and she looked at it and said "oh, okay". Sounds to me like  he was going to give her some specific directions?? I don't know.

At any rate, here I sit, waiting. I heard of a commercial on the radio.....about ovarian cancer.

I watched the news last night and saw an ad........about ovarian cancer.

I don't think I have cancer, but boy, it seems to be popping out at me all of a sudden.

Bottom line: how LONG do I have to wait for this referral business if I don't "have cancer"?!?! I just want to see what's up with this  little ol' cyst that the gyn says is stable, but my ovary itself is twice the size of normal.

I am getting backaches and can't pick up two laundry baskets together anymore. (okay, that's funny, but true) I am feeling more pains that usual and they are consistent and persistent.

I want my referral yesterday.

Thanks,
Suzanne
feeling whiny today.....

[ShawnP]

I don't blame you for feeling whiny, one bit!  It doesn't take 10 days for a referral, atleast not down here in Texas.  I used to handle referrals for PCP's and at the most, depending on the Insurance carrier, was 3 days.  98% of the referral were done by me and submitted to the insurance.  Do you have an HMO or another plan that requires a referral?

Anyway, I have similiar symptoms....started with a backache, bowel problems, no lifting......complex cyst on right ovary...surgery scheduled 7/12.  Within 1 week of seeing my PCP and having Ultrasounds, I had already seen 2 gyn and gyn/onc and scheduled surgery.  Plans are to remove both ovaries, since I am in my early 40's, never had children, partial hyst in '97, never had a cyst either.  My pain has gotten worse since I scheduled my surgery and I can't wait until the 12th.

There are wonderful women here, some awaiting their diagnosis, like me, and others that already have Ovarian Cancer.  They offer good advice and support.  I've only been on the site for about 10 days, I love it.  Very informative and the gals here are just great!

Sorry to ramble........but, I can try to help you with ideas to get in faster if I had more info.

Let me know,
Shawn in Texas

[Linda J]

Hi Suzanne, so you have waited almost 2 weeks for your referral?IMO, that is long enough. I'd call your doc, after the holiday weekend and say you'd like a referral pronto. It's the same old saying about "the squeaky wheel", you know?

Linda J

[turtledovemom]

Suzanne...
I know that you want to stay closer to home, so that might rule out Memorial Sloan Kettering.  However, both MSK as well as YALE-NEW HAVEN will allow you to find your own doctor!  Don't wait for your doc anymore, woman!  YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO RELEASE YOUR RECORDS TO ANYONE YOU WISH TO VIEW THEM!!!!! GRRRRRRR

OK...I'm over it now.  I just hate to think that you've been hanging on this long without cooperation for your doc.  Please, just do it.  

www.ynhh.org/findphys.html

If you need any other help, including arrangements for your kids, please let me know.  I'm literally only a few minutes away.  Let me know how you do.
peace,
Anne

[cthsmom]

I have Blue Cross/Blue Shield, but I must admit I don't know if that's an HMO? I think everyone pretty much participates in BC/BS, but I don't have a clue about a referral. The paper says In Network or Out of Network, I'd think Yale-New Haven would be In Network?

I try really hard to be Nice and Patient and give everyone The Benefit of the Doubt (and if my use of "quotes" bugs you, then my use of Capitals is a new twist).

Humor! HA!

Suzanne

[cthsmom]

You are very kind to offer to help me with the kids! THANK YOU! Fortunately, my mother-in-law is up from Florida for the summer so when/if anything comes up, we've got it covered. My parents are local too, just Dad has his own bunches of appts, etc.

God will cover it, He always does. :-)

As for the Yale referral info.....I did look that up last week. I found three gyn/oncs over there: one not accepting new patients, one with referral from pcp, and one older gentleman who would accept a self-referral. I just keep procrastinating, waiting to see if my own pcp will call.

Y'know, I have had bad experiences with some dr's, and it took me a while to find this pcp, and TRUST him, and he has indeed helped me  with some past issues. I am so polite it sometimes bugs me, why am I so Nice, and I ALWAYS say my Please's and Thank You's for his help, how I appreciate it, I even was super polite as he was NOT helping me (or at least, not yet)

and, and, and........

Now I'm trying not to cry, because I feel he let me down when I really TRUSTED him.

Well. Enough of that. I've been here before, needing to advocate for myself. I was just wondering what the expected time for a referral is, didn't want to push too much.

That wouldn't be polite.

Sigh.
Suzanne

[cthsmom]

Hi again!

I forgot to mention, that in speaking with my husband (er, I mean whining to my husband!) I asked what should I dooooo???

He thinks I need to call up L&M, since on their website they **specifically** mention gynecologic oncology. And they're local!

http://www.lmhospital.org/patient_services/ms_cancer.html

I hesitate though, because why wouldn't the pcp mention them??? He mentioned Yale as well as Women's & Children's in Providence. I don't really want to go out of state though. Why would he mention Yale but not L&M if they have gyn/onc listed as a specialty? I find that odd.

Suzanne
P.S. What was with all of the sirens around 8 or 8:30, did you hear that? I even smelled smoke briefly.

[cthsmom]

Hi to you again too!

I did some research, that's why I love this computer, right?

This is what I found out:

"You do not have to see a primary care physician for a referral to a physician specialist or other health care providers, unless you want to. However, if you choose to see a non-participating provider, you will have to pay higher out-of-pocket expenses."

Thanks for giving me the nudge to look this up.

I did accidentally type "for giving me the nude", but didn't think you wanted to get that personal. :-)

I did go to see my pcp for the referral though because I/we always gripe about communicating with dr's, and I feel this is a two-way street. I wanted to include him in my plans/thoughts/ideas on how to get through this problem.

Trying very hard not to say MEN!

Suzanne

[turtledovemom]

Suzanne...
I didn't know that L&M had a gyn'onc.  When I was supposed to have my regular gyn along with a general surgeon do my surgery there originally, they said that if they found another malignancy they would close me up and send me to Providence.  Needless to say, that didn't sit well with us at all.  I was very fortunate to have the ability to just have the gyn/onc at MSK do the procedure.  Personally, I wish you would contact them.  They'd be able to see you pretty promptly and they just opened a brand new OR suite...quite the place as I understand it.  If you can contact someone at L&M for gyn/onc, do it, hon!  You are past the point of hurting anyone's feelings!  I'm telling you, if you need help...I'm more than willing to help, but please be strong for yourself!

Bottom line...you should not have had to wait all this time...same as I shouldn't have had to do it back in the spring.  Honestly, I wish I knew who your docs were here at home.  I'm dying with curiosity to find out who is being such a bonehead towards you.  

I'll confess that we had a first tonight, so I couldn't hear the sirens.  We actually went to the Sun for dinner with our sons and my Dad...the left in one care and we walked the shops and actually played the slots for the first time EVER!  Go figure!  It was fun to get out and just do something silly.  
peace,
Anne

[turtledovemom]

PS
For the record, my general surgeon...a great guy that I had placed a lot of trust in before this...had taken care of me for another serious procedure and did a great job...was STILL in serious denial when I told him that this past beast was indeed ovarian.  He was absolutely convinced that it was a duplication cyst.  What a boob.  If I sound militant about this, it's because I am.  No one should have to endure pain this long.  You have a right to expect this to be resolved...like yesterday, eh?  Hang in there, hon.  Be strong, take a stand for yourself.  Please keep me posted.
peace,
Anne

[turtledovemom]

Duh!  I just checked the L&M link.  Of course I knew there was a Comprehensive Cancer Care Center there.  I walk by it every time I go to Radiology...what a dope!

[dairelle]

Hi everyone!  I am wondering if any of you girls are from Canada.  I am on the never ending waiting list for everything it seems.  I origionally had my first pain in May.  As of last mon.....My doc said she will call me when she gets me an appt. with Gyn.  Probably not until late Aug/Sept I was told.  I still haven't heard back.  I was given 20 tylenol 3, which I am almost through and told no big worries cause I'm too young for this to be anything serious.  I'm glad she is so optomistic.

Sorry to grumble!  But I feel your frustration.

[perserverance]

Hey Dairelle,

I will be having a hysterectomy, but saving the ovaries if He can. I also have had two major surgeries, on the abdomen a laproscopy, laparonomy from a car accident,and interserception. My gyno was called to go to the delivery, so I didn't get much info.
You take care too, keep up with being positive, and hope you get to see your doctor soon with good news. Thanks,  I will keep you posted:)

                         Sue

[dairelle]

Hi there!  I'm not young that is what peaves me off.  I am 34 years and have had three children.  I went through with my tubal ligation when I was 23.  My doctor wasn't happy buy too bad, I say.  A lump on my larinex (sorry if mispelled) was first to be found 5 years ago and ultrasound showed it was probably not cancer.  2 months ago lumps in my breasts and 6 weeks ago hemorrhagic cyst on the right.  (they think) still waiting cause now I'm feeling pain everywhere mostly on the left so my doc doesn't know what to do. Se thinks maybe endometriosis.  That is why I wait.  What  worries me is that I have been feeling yucky for years in regards to maybe early menopaus with hot flashes that get so bad that I literally shake and get sick.  Again she thinks I'm too young.  From what I read in this forum, I can easily fall under any of these problems alot of you gals share.  I do find this very helpful for my own sanity though.....thank you just for listening

[dairelle]

Hi again.  I did comment with a qurstion at the top "ovarian cysts" maybe you can help.

Thanks again, Dairelle

[Tybear]

Hi there! I'm from Barrie, Ont and had my surgery in Toronto at Sunnybrook Hospital. First off - you are not to young for this to be anything serious. I was 26 last year when I was diagnosed with stage IIIc Ovarian Cancer - no family history of cancer at all. I was referred to a gyne/onc from my local hospital and it took 3 weeks to get in, although by that point they knew I had something bad going on inside me, they just couldn't pinpoint what - I'm sure that's why I was able to get in so quick. Where are you from in Canada?

[turtledovemom]

Dairelle...
It really frightens me to hear a doctor say that 34 is too young for an ovca diagnosis.  I was 22 when first diagnosed, with no prior family history that I knew of.  We've heard horror stories of patients even younger than that.  It is true that about 99% of all cysts are benign, but better safe than sorry.  If you can locate a gynecoogist/oncologist, please consider having a second opinion from them.  As Dian would say, "you only have one chance to do this the right way".  
peace,
Anne

[cthsmom]

Nawww, you're not a dope, you just forgot. Happens to everyone.

If you want to know names of the dr's I'm dealing with, feel free to email me, probably not prudent to broadcast it all over the internet.. Just add @hotmail.com to the nickname up there.

Suzanne  

[turtledovemom]

Gotcha!

[perserverance]

Hi there fello Canadian, by the way, Happy Belated Canada Day!

I am from Montreal Canada. I know what you mean by never ending.  I started having really bad pains in Jan. ,had an u/s done at emergency, I had a gyno already ,but found out that she was on medical leave, and would have to wait till June to see her colleague, (she referred all her patients too.) I had to get a referral before June since, i needed to do another u/s, I found a gyno that could see me in  April, and He didn't understand y i needed a referral if I had already scheduled the appointment for the u/s. The appointment for the u/s was already scheduled, they knew that I needed a follow up in 2 menstral cyles, but needed a referral.  There is no need for me to be examined he said, and spoke to me in half French and English saying that  it hasn't been long and wouldn't need to see him until June. He seemed to me very burnt out, He actually cancelled that appointment too, . Anyways I am glad that the gyno I have now (thats the one that was referred, by my gyno on medical leave), has been so kind. I will have surgery on the 24th of August.  
If you have to wait that long wouldn't it be better to just go to the emergency? You have medicare right? They will give you another u/s, esp. that you are also in a lot of pain, than ask for a referral there for a gyno. Maybe it would be faster, or call up and find out if she made an appointment yet, its funny she didn;t get back to you, sometimes they need to be reminded. Most of the time I would have to make the appointment, it is really hard eh, to find one that is good and not taking anymore patients.  Linda J. mentioned something  about being a sueaky wheel, its so true!!! Especially how the medical system is today!!! Praying for you!  Sue.

[dairelle]

Hi Ladies;  I am from Vancouver.  I have been with my doc for 14 years and ws reluctant to find one because she has a goog history of what I ave gone through.  With a few reminders mind you.  When I decided to swap, it was too late.  There aren't enough docs to go around it seems.  I just get upset with her now, so she gets onto things sooner.  She was straight with me in that she doesn't send more than 6 patients in any given month becaus ethen the government expects reports as to why so many specialists.  She said she doesn't have time for it.....I had a landlady once that died at 35yrs because she complained to doctors about a pain in her lung and 4 years went by she sought a 2nd opinion and was finally sent for a simple xray that showed lung cancer that was too late.  She died 3 months later.  Very sad...

Tybear, I don't know about Ontario anymore, but here we pay cas to see anyone quicker.

Thanks for your thoughts Turtledovemom.

[dairelle]

Hey Sue, your situation sounds the same as far as docs.  I do have medicare but, if I go to emerg they will tell me to go back to the doc.  I won't hesitate if the pain gets worse agian.  As long as we stay possitive, I feel that time will go by quick enough and eventually something will get done.

Take Care! Let me know how your surgery goes!  I missed what your surgery was for.

[Teresa210]

I am from the United States - we are well on our way to the very same scenario of playing the waiting game, but if we insist and push we can get in quicker.  Here in Nevada, we have a lot of medical politics going on, so when we demand our right for medical care, a lot of the time we end up with angry overworked doctors who don't take the time necessary to help you properly or young and inexperienced.  I feel for you and understand your frustration.  How old are you?  Don't worry to much, expecially if you can't do anything about it.  The stress alone can make you feel even worse.  But.. the comment by the doctor that you are young so it probably isn't anything serious anyway sends an angry red flag up for me.  While that may be a statistic, it is possible to have something serious when you are young.  I had a precancerous growth on my cervix that I had to have surgerically removed when I was only 14 years old.  I had to go to the OBGYN every three months for the first year, then and every four months for the next 6 years to follow-up.

[turtledovemom]

What an unfortunate situation.  There is a significant number of cancer centers and teaching hospitals that accept and actually welcome international patients.  Perhaps that might be an option for you.  If not, my thoughts and prayers are with you.  Stay strong!
peace,
Anne