I cant handle this anymore!!!!

[crazyladi99]

Okay i guess maybe i just need to vent.  I dont think that I can wait until May-June for my surgery.(Canadian waiting line :(  

I have lived with this for more than 10 yrs and now that i know what it is I want it out and I am so stressed and today I guess is a bad emotional day.  I want to kill everyone I see or snap at them for nothing.  I feel like a witch.  

I was told Since I was 17 yrs old that I have fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue etc etc etc oh ya sorry cant forget Depression lets just blame that because we cant find whats wrong with you besides Hypocondriacizm. So I am angry because #1 When this first started to happen my Doctor said that he could no longer see me because I cried to much and he couldnt help me.. and #2 the next doctor I had, someone one musta pissed in his corn flakes because I went there because I was sick , naesated and he looked at me while i was walking to his office in front of everyone so that they could hear " what exactly is your problem that you had to but infront of these nice people?  What the F--- is wrong with these doctors.  I cant believe that in  10 yrs not one doctor sent me for an ultrasound.  They took away 10 yrs of my life and I am only 28.  How could they do this.  

Angela

As you can see I am so angry and frustrated and I just want to freak out.  So even if no one reads this at least i could let it out instead of keeping it all inside....

[Spicegirl]

Hi Girls - Sunday morning and am just getting up - sorry I couldn't join your virtual party last night - sounds like a hoot.  I was out with friends - I really needed to relax.  I have been doing great so far with the whole waiting game and have tried to remain positive.  Well, Friday at work I had a total melt down.  I am the boss and am just so stressed out about getting things done before I go on sick leave (surgery on the 23rd) I guess it finally got to me.  My staff have been great but I'm usually the strong one.  I finally realized yesterday that it takes a lot of strength to be tobe the "tough one" - I'm always the one someone comes to when they have  a problem and didn't realize how hard it would be when I had one.  So, went out with a group of friends last night and had a blast (a few drinks too).  Went to a ducks unlimited fundraising event and cleaned up on the raffles (yahoo).  Won a big basket of chocolate goodies and am saving it for my next meltdown.  Spicegirl.

[crazyladi99]

I did get lucky with my ultrasound so I cant complain i was having contraction like pains lasting 5 hrs so i got my U/S done the next day.  I was expecting maybe March/April but come on.. I am waiting for an attack to happen again and i am off to the hospital and hopefully they will do it than.  I havent had one since Jan 11th so its not looking promising :(  how much does it cost for this type of surgery in the US?  

What sucks the most is that I am a single mother, with NO help at all.  So this is going to be just great.  I wont get paid so lets see(((( who is paying my rent and stuff??)))))  Got a problem there too.  This is all mens fault lol.. What pain do they suffer?  No enough if you ask me lol

[JGMom]

I'm so sorry Angela.  You certainly have the right to vent and be frustrated as all getout.  Waiting 10 yrs and then waiting again now that you know what it is til May/June is ridiculous. A Dr talking to you that way is unprofessional and inhumane to say the least.  I wish some of these bozos could spend even a day in our shoes and then they wouldn't be so quick to treat patients like this.  I'm furious for you; I've had my share of nasty dismissive Drs especially trying to get help for my son.  I realize it is easier for me to move on to a different Dr than for you b/c of different health systems.  I'm sorry for my ignorance about your health system, but is there no way you can get a 2nd opinion or get away from this one Dr?  I wish I knew your system better so I could offer some help.  It's just terrible what you've had to go through.

[AnotherKatie]

Hi Angela!  Sorry, I haven't read your previous posts but it's really good you wrote, keep writing, it is great for the soul and there are no censors here!  Say what you want, we support you.... and we've all been there.  I agree, the Canuck health care system SUCKS big time.  I whined on this forum on Feb 28, I had a hysterectomy on the 24th and went home early on the 25th.  HUGE bed shortages and stressed out medical people.  I am doing better every day, hour by hour.  Can you find a nice doctor, who you can talk to and who you feel comfortable with?  You are not a witch, your hormones are probably right messed up.
May I offer a few suggestions: maybe try doing a little walk every day? Eat well, don't smoke or drink (except at the virtual parties) take vitamins, and believe it or not, try cutting out dairy products and coffee (just my personal belief, can't hurt to try).
Hang in there, Love and prayers, Katie

[AnotherKatie]

There is a severe doctor shortage here in Western Canada.  Most docs go the States, where they can make more money. About the only way you can get a doctor is to wait (on average) six hours at a drop-in clinic (also known as hell).  There is a slight possibility that the doctor may be taking new patients and will take you on. Often, the docs at drop-ins are not interested in having a practice due to the ridiculous toll the system takes on them.  Specialists (if they accept new patients, most do not) won't take you without a referral and lots of people here can't even find a GP to refer them. Standard waits: I waited over two months for an ultrasound, two months to see the specialist and then two months after that for the surgery, and that was speeded up thanks to my GP.  Minimum wait one year for a colonoscopy.  Two years for a hip or knee replacement.  Six months minimum for a CT scan.  If you have bucks, you can go private and pay, which I resent so much.  Billions have been poured into the system.  They tear down hospitals and then build new ones.  It's nuts.  I feel sorry for the doctors and nurses.  I was annoyed with my surgeon initially but I think he is just overworked.  The (entrenched) government doesn't care about health care. The public education system is pretty bad too.

[Curls]

Loosing time like that to nothing more than poor insensitivity and incompetence is hard.  If venting helps, vent.  If throwing darts at drawings of them, throw darts.  If crying and wondering if it's reality or hormones are why you are crying, then cry.  My heart goes out to you.  I lost much of my adult time up to now due to very bad doctoring (long story but probably the stress trigger for (mine happens to be actual) CFS) so I can begin to know how you feel.  - Cheri

[crazyladi99]

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