I feel so lost

December 2nd my mother was admitted to the hospital and was told she had ovarian cancer. she went in because she had constipation, unable to eat/drink much and was very uncomfortable. we thought maybe she just needed an enema. how stupid i feel for not knowing any better.
She had 4liters of fluid pulled from her abdomen (parasynthesis) and another 1.5 from her lungs (thorasyntesis, needed a drain tube then packed with talc). She was pretty much in the hospital from the day she found out (except for a couple of days). She has been dianosed with stage IV ovarian cancer.
She was told she would need chemo first before considering surgery (3x, surgery, 3x). She got her first round of chemo in the hospital and within 2 days was back in the ICU. All her blood levels plummeted =( After leaving the ICU she ended up getting a blood transfusion and felt much better. Her 2nd round of chemo was given 2 days before she was discharged from the hospital. She ended up back in the emergency room after 3 days due to severe abdomen pain and not feeling well. Her WBC were at 0.5, she was admitted again.
She ended getting another blood transfusion and was discharged on 1/18. She's due to have her next round of chemo tomorrow, this time outpatient. She will be getting daily injections of neupogen (sp?). My question is, is she going to do better this time around? I really hope we can keep her out of the hospital! I'm so scared for her. She's 57 and never been a sickly person, it is very difficult for me to see her like this.
I'm just so lost right now. She's staying with my sis for now but her husband does not want my mother to stay in their house so she will be moving in with me in the next week (after her daily shots). I've been handling all her medical/insurance matters as well as taking her to all her appts (this is a task since I live 65mi away). I'm in the process of trying to get her qualified for medi-cal since her private insurance covers very little and she needs a PET scan that her insurance won't approve since she has a yearly maximum of $400 for labs and procedures.
Her oncologists has not given us a pronosis and I have no clue if that's normal or not, all he's said was "time will tell". I'm just so confused will all this. Is my mom going to die? Are my 2 small children going to watch her suffer? My mom's youngest sis died of ovarian cancer and it was hard watching her go through that battle. I don't really know what the point of this post is, I guess I'm just looking for kind words or reassurance.

[bc0910]

First of all I have been in your position and my mother battled 4 types of cancer from the 70s untill she passed in 2000, so I can relate to how your feeling.  I also am battling ovarian cancer and I say battle as that is what it is.  And as you have seen most times the treatment is harder on a person than the cancer itself.  No one can tell you if your mother will die from this but all I can recommend is get ahold of your mothers oncologist next visit if you need to do it alone than see him after your moms appt but tell him to tell you point blank what is the prognosis and explain to him you have children at home and need to know what you have in store in the future if he or she is like my gyn/onc they will give you all the scenarios good bad and indifferent and that is the way it should be, than at least you know whats going on.  Good luck to you and your mom

[BoombaLove]

Thank you for replying. Her oncologist is so difficult to get a hold of outside of an appointment (he's supposedly one of the top oncologists in the area). When I asked about her prognosis in the hospital he said "only time will tell". I feel like there's more info on her that's not being told to me but what do I know? I know she needs a PET scan done but with all the drama I'm going through with getting Medi-Cal, who knows when that will happen. Her medical bills are racking up and I don't want her to stress about them.
She's going in for her 3rd round of chemo today and will be getting the daily injections of neupogen for 5 days, they're $130 a pop! I'm hoping she will stay out of the hospital this time. The last couple of days she's been so tired and sleeping a lot, I'm just so worried about her. I will definitely demand more answers at the next appt we have in a couple of weeks.
These last 2 months, my life has been turned upsidedown. My aunt (dad's sis) was just diagnosed with stage 3 rectal cancer, I'm an emotional wreck!
I wish you all the best with your fight. Are you going through chemo currently? Have you had surgery?

[bc0910]

Just make sure you make a list of questions so you can get all your answers when you speak with the doctor it helps may seem silly but a list helps.  I am on my secound round with chemo had 18 treatments last year but ended up with a perforated colin from it had to take a break after that surgery.  But I had a radical debulking and total hyesterectomy before I started my chemo the first time.  Went into remission for 2 months and than it came back .  So back in november of 2011 I started another form of chemo I am about half way thru again I only have 18 treatments scheduled this time 6 months of 3 treatments a month.  But you just have to keep positive and trudge along.  I was exhausted the first time like your mom I only had one day a week I felt good it was pretty rough the first go round this one is much easier on me.  Again hope this helps and good luck

[jennerfennerbenner]

Im so sorry for what you are going through.  My mom died when i was a teenager and now my youngest sister is battling this disease.  Im here for you.  Dont be afraid to ask questions