No surgery for ovarian cancer?

My mom, (60yrs old) was diagnosed in May with stage 4 ovarian cancer.  She did 2 rounds of chemo (paclitaxel and carboplatin) and then 2 rounds of Topotecan) Her doctor said it wasn't working and cancelled the chemo and surgery.  Most information I can find indicates surgery as one of the first steps. She had no real side effects to either chemo, except feeling a bit nauseous during the Topotecan.  She has no pain, no symptoms other than fluid in her lungs, which was how the cancer was diagnosed, after draining the first time. (waiting to go in to have drained again) We are trying to get 2nd & 3 opinions, but would like to know if the above sequence is common, as it doesn't seem to be.
Thanks for any help or suggestions.

[Lh]

I'd get a second opinion asap, preferably from a onc/gyn. Some doctors do chemo first to try to reduce the tumor load for debalking surgery. Regardless, if it were me, I would not want a doctor who seems to give up so easily.  Find another doctor.

[kathy o]

I think that you need a second opinion. I feel Dr. maybe gave up to easy? I have an friend who also in stage four with fluid in lungs and all, she is doing good she is on round 10 of chemo and her ca125 started at 4000 and is now down to 95. She did have surgery  and all of that too. They just threw the whole maintence plan at her, kinda shocking to hear you have to do 12 more chemos. But we all know we can survive that!! Good luck and god bless :-)

[kathy o]

Juat a quick note on Drs. I was misdiagnosed twice, one Dr.told me to go home and eat my Cheerios in the am. I already had what looked like a 9 nonth pregnacy goin on! Second DR. told me nothing and the third Dr figured it  out already I was in stage three OC out so you have to be dilligent no matter what!  I recently called the first two Drs.. and told him the next time someone comes in with my symptoms that they would consider Ovarian Cancer. I hope than you can soon post some good news for your MOM.

[Kathy W]

GET HER TO A DIFFERENT DOCTOR ASAP:

There is NO WAY that if your mother is willing to  F I G H T  That this ignorant, non-empathetic doctor should give up on her!  GET A NEW GYNECOLOGIST/ONCOLOGIST !!  

REMEMBER:

Doctors are human beings capable of mistakes.  They get worn down, tired, over-worked.  The make BAD decisions, just like us.  They are imperfect.  Find a doctor that is willing to go the distance with your mother.  60 is YOUNG!  She can fight.  She can win.  She can extend her life.  

Forget that doctor:  Move on.

God Bless you and your mother in your journey!

Kathy  :)  Minnesota

[Targ]

Thank you!  We have 2 cancer groups that she is having her files sent to, to get her in for 2nd & 3rd opinions.  
Kathy O. - your comment about your friend is EXACTLY what I wanted to hear.  My mom doesn't want to give up, is frustrated that her doctor did, especially as other than the fluid on the lungs, she feels great...
Thanks again both of you for the support and advice.

[NikkiPoo]

Targ I just wanted to send best wishes & hugs to you & your Mom.
Good luck with the next doctor.

[Targ]

Thanks again everyone.  We've got 2 different doctor's/clinics looking at her files now.  The clinic has 2 gyn/onc's on staff, they said they would have following the first 2 chemo attempts with Caelyx, in an attempt to slow the growth down, thereby opening up other options.  The other oncologist has somewhat of a reputation as a "chemo specialist" who has had a fair bit of success with difficult cancers that have not responded well to standard chemo treatments.  
Thanks again, for your advice, thoughts and well wishes. Will hopefully post some good news soon.

[luce777]

Hello everyone,

I am so scared for my 62 year old mother who we are taking into today to see if she has oc. She started losing weight over the summer and assumed it was because she had retired in January and was depressed over not being a work. Dad and I tried to get her to go to the doctor but she didn't listen. Fear. Soon, she noticed that her body was doing that postmenopausal switch to having a big belly. However, in the last month, her upper adomen has swollen too. This finally got her scared enough to go. I'm so scared as I'm wondering does this mean she's at stage 3 or stage 4? I'm a wreck and having been reading everything I can in the last 24 hours on the internet (and most of it is not positive). Thanks for your prayers for my family!

[kathy o]

thinking about you and your family, hopefully you will get answers quick  and whatever treatment neccesary will start asap. Best of Luck

[luce777]

Thanks so much! I sent you an email at your personal account.

[Targ]

Like you, when Mom was first diagnosed, I searched the internet looking for information, very little of which was positive.  There ARE positive stories out there, including Kathy O's friend's story in this thread. Also, even though the stats aren't as good as we'd like, like I told my mom, there ARE people who either beat it or live a full life with it, why can't she be one of them? If you want to email me your email address I can send you some of the positive stories we've managed to find on the 'net. (my address is ***@****)  
As for getting mom to the doctor's, she was hospitalized to have fluid removed from her lungs, and they discovered ovarian cancer cells in the fluid, which is how she was diagnosed. Apparently, when that happens, it is pretty much guaranteed a stage 4 diagnosis.  
I also talked with a couple of people who have had or have cancer and a couple of things kept coming up.
1. Positive attitude!  A co-worker I used to have, had breast cancer 11 years ago.  It keeps popping back up in other areas, and she gets it treated. If it hurts, get medication for it. She tried to "live with it" and once she got some painkillers, she started to enjoy life again. (it had metastized into her bones about 6 years ago, causing her pain then)
2. It's ok for her to feel sorry for herself, but not to give up.  A friend's wife told me that it was really hard for her, as some days she wanted to just sit and feel sorry for herself, but he would panic when she would, thinking she was giving up. If anyone has a right to a pity party, it's anyone going through this. (also, I've read that chemo can cause depression, so be aware if the feeling sorry for herself lasts for any stretch of time)
Sorry to run on, but when I re-read your post about the lack of positive in researching this, I knew exactly what you were seeing!  
Keep us posted on your mom's progress, pulling for you both!

[Targ]

Thanks for your thoughts.  Things are looking up... There was some miscommunication between my mom and her doctor, they are going into another round of chemo, and her lungs are being drained Monday. The fluid is the reason the surgery was cancelled.  Her files are also be forwarded to the cancer centre in my province, for a second opinion.  Apparently the tumors are still only on the ovaries themselves, and they will remove them when safe to do so.  I think tonight will be the first night in a long while that my family will get a good night's sleep, Mom included.
Thank you again for your thoughts and warm wishes.  Your support and positive thoughts were a light in a dark stretch.

[Targ]

A couple of things, as we were in almost the same situation a couple of months ago.  Make SURE someone goes with her to ALL dr's appointments, as a patient advocate.  My dad went with my mom for the first couple, then she started going by herself.  It is really important that someone else is there to hear what the patient themselves might miss.  
My sister supplied my mom with a 3 ring binder, and a hole punch (no excuses then) for all information the doctors gave her. I don't know what the laws are where you are, but the cancer clinic in my province told us that Mom is entitled to copies of ALL tests and reports on her.  (she lives in a different province than we do)  
Make sure she asks as many questions as she needs to.  My mom didn't find out until 2 weeks ago that she was stage 4, and she was diagnosed in May.  
Good luck to your mom, help her fight it.  

[luce777]

Hello!

Thank you so much for your thoughts! Yes, my Aunt and I are going today and tomorrow with her for her tests. I'm talking to my aunt now about a game plan to push for answers on her questions. I don't know about you but just getting her there was a big step of which I'm very proud of her for doing. How is your mother?