hello finkaz and kaz39

[logsog72]

Hi girls, just read your postings about your mum's funerals and how you are both feeling now and I cried my eyes out(actually still crying!)It is just so, so awful and unfair. I'm truly sorry for you both.
My mum started chemo 4 weeks ago and signs are she is responding(CA125 has gone down from 1000 to 800) but of course it is early days. She is in the house all the time as is too tired to go out, she has lost so much weight and looks a poor little soul. I can't help but feel guilty that she doesn't want this but is just going along with chemo for me, my sisters, dad etc(she insists she does)She really has no quality of life and I do worry that she will finish chemo and but won't get any time before it's back again(as it is definitely coming back)Life just seems on permanent hold. I had lunch with some of my close friends at the weekend and one of them was all concerned and had to call home as her mum had a migrane!!! I mean some people really have no clue do they?? Hope you and your children are bearing up as best you can. My son is only a year and half so it is very unlikely that my mum will live long enough for him to remember her. That is the worst thing to come to terms with, that he won't have this wonderful person in his life. take care, lots of lovexxx

[kaz39]

hi i too am glad your mum is responding. like finkaz my darling mum had no quality of anything for 9 months, it was heart breaking to watch such a wonderful caring mum, nan, person go through all of it. it is all such a nightmare. she is at peace now, but nothing helps you to come to terms with what has happened. it breaks my heart to know that i, my brother, sister and my mums grandchildren do not have her with us, she didnt want to go she just wanted to stay with her family, what a cruel evil disease this is. it is 8 days till the anniversary of my dear dads passing over, and my mum has passed over as well, it is very very hard to come to terms with. my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family xx

[finkaz]

im glad that your mum is responding, but like you say it is probable that it will come back you must try to be optimistic but also realistic.  It is like having a big dirty black cloud hanging over the family just waiting for it to rain, you are quite right in saying there is no quality of life my mums last 9 months were hell for her and unfortunately i keep dwelling on this and it upsets me to think of what she must have gone through even though now i know she is at peace, i must try not to focus on the last 9 months. How old is your mum? mine was 55, no age to be going and she was so full of life and energy.  The funeral went well and it was standing room only she was so popular. We all miss her badly and every day i cry it really hits me when my dad visists and he goes into the garage with my husband to do mens stuff and im stuck alone in the house when normally mum would be chatting to me, its the little things that remind you.  Love& strength to you all, and please keep us posted.