logsog how is your mum?

[kaz39]

hi logsog i was wandering how your mum is doing? my thoughts are with you and your mum xx

[kaz39]

hi logsog, i hope the infection soon gets better, my love and thoughts are with you and your mum xx

[kaz39]

hi finkaz my love and thoughts are with you, as you are an only child do you have any other family members with you for support? i will keep you in my prayers xx

[finkaz]

she has hung on through my sons birthday but she is unconscious now, it has got to the stage where i just want her to go she would hate to be like this, mum is 55 and i am 38 and an only child.  I am sorry to hear that you lost your dad not so long ago life is so cruel.  The district nurse who also lost her mum to ovca in march has arranged for me and my daughter to be screened for ovca, to have a yearly ca125 and pelvic scan she strongly advises it. Love & Prayers go to you and your family.

[logsog72]

To finkaz/kaz39  Hi Girls, sorry haven't been in touch for couple of days but have been back and forth to hospital trying to get things moving for my mum..
Firstly, I'm so sorry things seem to have deteriotated so quickly for both your mums, it is so heartbreaking,truly the worst of the worst. I read that both of you like me are in your thrities.. far too young for a girl to lose their mum/best friend!The thing that really devastates me is mine won't be around to see my son grow up!Please let me know how things are for you both..And don't feel bad about anger, I feel angry a lot at the total injustice of it all.
I'm based in Glasgow and my mum is in hosptial in outskirts of city(near to where she lives) but she attends Oncology hosp in Glasgow. Her Consultant has been wonderful, and at my request came to visit her in hosp yesterday..he is very realisitc with no false hope, just the facts, as scary as most of them are. I have faith in him and it is all down to this infection clearing(still no improvement in that today)Having him visit has definitely made hosp buck up their ideas and they are administering even more antibiotics daily to try and shift infection...it is just a waiting game now and hope that she can hold on for chemo...My thoughts and prayers are with you bothxxxx

[kaz39]

hi i do hope your mum can hold on for your sons birthday to pass, how are you coping? my mum is detioriorating very quick, it is terrible to watch isnt it? i am not coping very well with it all, my brother and sister aren't either. i was wandering how old your mum is, mine has just turned 60, and i am 39.  along with everything else i feel so angry, why did this all have to happen and so quick. my thoughts are with you all and sending you and your mum a big hug xx

[finkaz]

my mum was treated at weston park in sheffield, dont think she ever saw a gynae oncologist like our fellow americans insist on, i thought mum's oncologist was very "wishy washy" and  talked a good talk, he gave us false hopes on a number of occasions and didnt really paint a realistic picture (unless he was very inexperienced in this type of cancer) he told us he would order scans and didnt, he would have known chemo wasnt working if he had done a scan. Anyway it is no good blaming anyone it wont alter anything but my confidence in the medical staff in this country just plummets all the time.  Mum didnt wake up yesterday at all dont know if she is in a coma or what, so still waiting, it is my sons birthday tomorrow so im hoping she doesnt go then. Hows things at your end , are you bearing up?

[kaz39]

like you both it is worse than any nightmare, you try to sleep and keep waking up, then in the morning it hits you straight away what is happening, your mum isnt only your mum shes also your best friend isnt she?  my mum has always been my best friend! i cant begin to imagine life without her. where are both of your mums being treated? we are in colchester in essex. i will keep praying for a miracle for my mum and your mums, my thoughts are with you both xx

[finkaz]

I read your posting and it set me of crying agin, my heart goes out to both of you and kaz39, i am just waiting now for it all to end i cant believe my beautiful bubbly mum has turned into this life is so cruel! you are right it is very surreal i wake up in the morning and think oh god it is real and its still here it is like a hurricaine has swept through our lives, like you i kept praying for a miracle, dont think he heard me though!!  all the best.

[logsog72]

I know exactly what you mean about a miracle! I'm so so sorry things have come to this for your mum, and the fact you have not long come through such a rough time with losing your dad. It must feel like a nightmare...It all feels sort of surreal to me like I can't believe this is actually happening. I have found myself avoiding certain friends who have healthy mums! does that sound crazy? But at a time like this I just feel that unless a person has been through it or going through it with a parent then they really don't understand the devasting effect it has on your life. Everything seems so trivial..one of my mum's favourite sayings when I was growing up was 'health is wealth' How right she was.
You and your mum are in my thoughtsxx

[kaz39]

hi sorry to hear your mum isnt any better. it is so heartbreaking to see your parent in pain. my mum came home yesterday having the district nurse come in every 24 hours to change over the morphine driver, she is asleep or in bed most of the time, hasnt got any energy to get up, bless her! i cant believe it has come to all this, and so quickly. she was only diagnosed in jan, and my dad passed away (with cancer) in october not even a year ago. i hope and pray for a miracle the whole time, and i hope your mum starts to pick up very soon. my thoughts are with you and your family xx

[logsog72]

HI, I already sent you posting but it doesn't seem to have popped up, so sorry if I'm repeating myself.

My mum still has infection and fluid in her abdomen is also infected so they had to stop draining and it is continuing to build up(she is looking 9 months pregnant again)She is in so much pain and all the fluid is so uncomfortable as well.  It is a vicious cycle, she can't get fluid drained until infection clears, the fluid will keep building until she gets chemo but of course can't get any until infection clears! It is so horrible to feel so out of control. One minute I feel optomistic and the next feel sure there is nothing they can do. Hate to see her suffering but glad she is still here. It was my mum and dad's anniversary today and she wanted to make an effort by wearing some lipstick. My dad's card said 'I pray I will be writing many more of these cards in the future' Just heartbreaking!

I pray that all hope is not lost for your mum.
Keeping you both in my thoughtsxxxx

[logsog72]

Thank you for your thoughts... she is still in hospital and not doing any better. They are still trying to find the source of her infection. They are giving her antibiotics but so far still in lots of pain so infection not cleared(still getting morphine) Her stomach is now back to being full of fluid-which is infected now too, she looks about 9 months pregnant but they cant drain it until the infection clears so it is just a vicious cycle.. Obviously she cannot get anymore Chemo until she is infection free but she is running out of time..so horrible having absolutely no control over this evil,unpredictable disease!
It was her Wedding Anniversary yesterday and she put lipstick on and my dad came into hospital all dressed up for her. He wrote in her card that he prayed he'd be writing many more of these cards in the future..so heartbreaking!
How is your mum doing? and how are you?
I'm thinking of you bothxxxxxxxxxxxxx