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Hallucination becoming more common and interacts with me.
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Hallucination becoming more common and interacts with me.

I am new here and hoping someone can tell me what is going on.

I keep seeing the same hallucination every couple of days, and I can’t believe I’m saying this but I’m starting to think it is real.  Even though I know it is not real, I can certainly see why people think NDEs are real.

Basically I see a gossamer-like substance in coils, with circumferences from two feet to five inches. In a full-blown episode, my entire bedroom is filled with it.

The first time I saw this was days after a serious suicide attempt. I was in my bathroom and noticed this fabric on the walls, with very thin gold threads. It was shaped in coils, and was constantly moving. I had just had a shower built in the bathroom, and I literally thought it was a protective fabric for the glass, and that it had just fallen off. But soon I realized it wasn't, though I still had no idea what it was (and still dont).

The thing that stunned me was that it reacted to me. There was a window across the hall, and it was very windy. Every time the wind reached the bathroom, these coils BILLOWED in the wind! So I tried to blow on it, and sure, enough it billowed as well.

Until recently, I would see this hallucination once a month or so, and found it fascinating, knowing it wasn't real. But now I am seeing it every couple of days, and it has escalated into the truly bizarre.

I have an air conditioner in my window, and I know how bizarre this sounds, but it actually starts writhing when the hallucinations start. There are vent levers on it, and they move up and down on their own!

I finally decided to get up and go toward it to see what would happen, because I’m tired of it scaring me. It was writing around like crazy, and I actually put my hand on it and could feel it moving.

I went over to my laundry basket, and held on to the bookshelf for balance, and the bookshelf was moving!

Everywhere I looked, the things in my room were moving, sort of writing around. I was committed to not being afraid, so I moved closer to see what was really happening, and it was all moving like crazy.I could FEEL it moving.

My pillows on my bed were moving, the covers had tunnels in them like some burrowed under them.

In the past, whenever I’ve seen the coils, I’ve tried to touch them, but it would just disintegrate. Last night, I had eaten a chocolate bar, and my fingers were sticky. I moved my hand through the coils, and SURE ENOUGH, THE STUFF STUCK MY STICKY FINGERS!

One last thing: while the coils are a gold color, there is a red color that sometimes pulls out of them. If this happens, the red often turns into red streamers, like the ones in a Chinese New Year dragon. The vertically movie through the coils. In a way it is very beautiful, but it is also the most unnerving.

Last, I feel like this stuff shows up when it wants to. A few times I’ve concentrated on certain spots it hovers in, and probably twice have gotten it to show up.

Other than that, I’ll be in my room and suddenly it’s filled with this stuff, and everything is writhing. Sigh…..

I do see a psychiatric nurse who is wonderful, but I haven’t been able to see her as often as I’d like. I’m going to call tomorrow and ask for a visit, because I want to know what this is!

I am currently taking Seroquel, Lexapro, Lamactil, Mirapex, Ambien, and Lorazepam if needed,

Has anyone experienced anything similar to this? I haven’t really been worried about it, knowing it wasn’t real. But lately, I’m starting to think it IS real, especially because it interacts with me.

Has anyone experienced anything similar to this? I am very worried about it, because it is so bizarre, yet so real.

I need help.

Thanks in advance.
Jaynee
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14 Comments Post a Comment
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471949_tn?1236907626
Hi...
Sorry to hear about this disturbing problem.  Your med list might be to blame here.  Who prescribes your meds????  Ambien just by itself is known for some very nasty side effects.  Take some time and look up on-line on WebMD all of your meds and their associated side effects.  Hate to say it; but don't rely on what your doc tells you as they only go by what they've seen.....and they haven't seen it all.

I've attempted suicide several times, have PTSD and major depression.  I've never been put on a med cocktail like that.  Also go to Google and type in "drug-drug interactions" and go to one of those websites and follow the instructions.....some meds interact very badly with others and might be causing what you are experiencing.  Again, docs don't always know this.

Don't be afraid to speak up to your doc....it's your body....research everything that you put into it.  Take good care,
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535822_tn?1413656274
I also think the drugs here could have been a factor ,did you get a follow up and what was the Nurses input on your experience it is always good for us to know how you are doing
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Avatar_f_tn
Ambien makes really pretty things on my walls, sometimes, too. I think the problem arises, however, when I take other medications close to the time I take Amboen. I am not familiar with your other medications. The Mayo clinic is helpful, so are pharmacists and the poison control center. After you take the ambien, go straight to bed; don't wait around for the hallucinations. I can have terrible hallucinations on ambien because I have vision damage in one eye, I actually see people. It is pretty scary. I have learned to patch that eye or go to sleep right away.

More seriously, you need help with managing your medications, to make sure there are no dangerous drug interactions. Please get help immediately. Drug interactions can create very dangerous situations. I am sure that you can get excellent help with this.
Walking around after having taken ambien can lead to ohysically dangerous situations.
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Avatar_m_tn
Hi JKJ, Thanks for responding to my post.

My cocktail of drugs is because I also have Chronic Fatigue Syndrome/Fibromyalgia. That’s why I have the strong pain meds, and if I didn’t have them, I wouldn’t be able to move. Sometimes I still can’t, but they have made a huge difference in my life.

I saw my doctor last week, and she is very concerned. She had me on the highest dose of Seroquel possible, to help my anxieties, and at first it worked really well. This was immediately after my suicide when everything was one long shriek. Two years later, it has been helpful to me.

However, she said I should not be having hallucinations on such a high dose of Seroquel. So, she has added resperidol (risperidone) (sp?) to deal with the hallucinations. It worked for two days, but last night they started again. I just took my Ambien and a few Lorazepam, got under the covers and pretended I don’t’ see anything. Even after taking Seroquel, resperidol (risperidone), Lorazepam and Ambien, it still took me a few hours to fall asleep, and during that time I paralyzed with fear that this will be something I’ll deal with the rest of my life.

I did go to the google drug interaction site you recommended, and there is a moderate issue with my respiredol, something like a Qt _____. I’m not sure what that is, but since it’s only a moderate issue, I am not sure whether it’s enough to worry about or not. Additionally, before put me on the resperidol (risperidone), within the last week,  I would not have previously had any drug interactions.

Oh, I forgot. My dextroamphetamine has a interaction as well, but I hardly ever take that. I take it if I know I have to be somewhere that day, and it helps me a lot. But other than that, I hardly ever take it.

My doctor is great to work with; however, it scared me how upset she was that I was still seeing these hallucinations. We talked a lot about why I’m having them, and she thinks its largely due to the severe grief I’m feeling after discovering one of the dearest friends of my life had passed away. I’m sure that is part of it as well….but it should be going away by now.

At least my air conditioner didn’t start breathing last night!

Thanks again for your help.

Jaynee
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Avatar_m_tn
Thanks for replying.

You know, I've never had a problem with Ambien, and have been taking it for years. However, I find it interesting you all think it could be a culprit, and am going to ask my doctor about it. I have an appt. in a week. Like I said above, she is very concerned about my hallucinations.

It hit me last week that what I am seeing is exactly what I've heard people who take LSD see . . . things coming to life and moving around, etc. I've never taken LSD, and have no idea what would be happening in my brain to make that happen. But it made me feel a little better, because, honestly, I am the strongest atheist/skeptic and don't believe in any of this.

But it interacts with me, and THAT has me very frightened. It is as if everything comes to life, and I don't understand this. What I'm saying is, I can totally understand now why people with NDEs believe they're real, and other things I've always been so skeptical about.

AnnaE, how did you find out it was an eye problem? I am seriously wondering about that, and am going to ask my doctor about it.

Actually, I'm seeing two doctors next week. One is a new gp because my knees are so bad I am crippled with them. But my doctor who manages my drugs doesn't want me to work on that with her, and she's right. It's a waste of both our times.

But I will mention everything to him, including a referral for a thorough eye exam, and then go one from them.

Again, thanks to all of you for caring enough to reply.

Jaynee
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492898_tn?1222247198
I think your doctor is treating you for psychosis, and he/she believes your hallucinations are from your psychotic symptoms. Therefore, he/she is trying to combat them by increasing your anti-psychotic meds, and now added  another one. She/he is worried, of course, that they are not working at such a high dose.

Now, I don't know your history, but I am almost certain that your hallucinations are not coming from any illness on your part.
Therefore, treating you for this with increasing doses is counterproductive. The problem, as some of the others here have suggested, are the medications themselves.

They can do unbelievable stuff, including cause depression and make you suicidal, and more. And even if you are suffering from severe PTSD and depression, they can still do that and make it all much worse. You are taking too many medications.

Another thing that sometimes causes visual hallucinations is when you have been addicted to a drug and are withdrawing.
Amphetamines can also do it.

listen, I am not saying you are not sick, and I am sure you are, but your doctor is over-prescribing and not getting the point, here.
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285927_tn?1380802356
Wow! You are on quite an array of meds. I would suggest you call the pharmacy and ask about drug interactions. ambien alone can cause the episodes you speak of, as well as lexipro.
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Avatar_f_tn
Sorry for loss. my typingc telegraphic because my arm has a temporary, big boo boo

i knew it was eye because eye w vision loss did hallucinations, not healtheir eye.
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285927_tn?1380802356
How ya doin? What did your doctors say? Thinking about you.
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