Does anyone just get effing mad at the world?

[tropicalsoul]

I'm just extremely angry right now.  I'm tired of hurting, I'm tired of taking pills, I'm tired of not being able to find the cause of my pain, I'm tired of the daily struggle, I'm tired of being dependent on the frickin pain pills, I'm tired of doctors using me as a guinea pig and not having any answers.....IM PISSSED OFF!  Just frickin mad at the world and want to scream.  I have no patience with anyone, I snap at anyone who even tries to speak with me and nothing makes me happy.

I'm allergic to asprin and ibuprofen so my only souce of pain relief is narcotics.   I HATE BEING DEPENDENT ON THESE DAMM THINGS!  I've been taking 20mgs of Lortabs each day for two years and have never called my doctor for an early refill but over the past few weeks I've noticed that I'm needing a little more to keep things under control and we all know that that means.  My body has developed a tollerance and now I need to increase my doseage and that scares the hell out of me.  

Thanks for letting me vent...I'm doing this on my own as my wife really does not understand what is happening.  

[Babs1469]

I get the why - me's all the time, usually they go away. The best advice I can offer you tropical is to just not try to get through it alone, trust in your doctors and if you don't ..... get a new doctor!  If Pain meds help you feel better and your doctor prescibes them but you still don't want to take narcotics you need to look into alternative forms of pain management. Acupuncture, massage, herbal supplements etc. Best of luck.

Babs

[Ghilly]

I COMPLETELY understand how you feel.  There are days when I am able to just go about my business, I'm in a really good mood, and it feels like all is right with the world.  Then there are those other days when it hits me (and it hits me like a ton of bricks when it does) that I will never again in my life have a day when I wake up without pain in my body, and I get so depressed that I have to force myself to push my emotions to the point of sadness, because if I don't, they go the other way to anger and at that point nobody would want to be around me.  On those days, if I hear someone saying that their foot hurts them because they wore shoes the night before to go dancing that didn't fit right I would just bite their head off and say "aren't you lucky!  You get to GO dancing!  How would you like to feel like you've got pieces of glass stuck in your feet when you don't even have shoes ON!?"  
I find myself getting mad when I hear someone complain that they have a pulled muscle that has been "aching" them all day.  I know that's not right or fair of me, but I just can't help how I feel.  But I think most of all I want to know WHY.  Why me?  I know that God has His plan for everyone, why is His plan for me to spend the rest of my life in pain?  To accomplish WHAT?  I think that's what makes me angriest of all.

Ghilly

[catwoman64]

i have been feeling the same way lately.  im so tired of the pain.  ive been snapping at everyone ... especially the ones that are here for me and try to help.  im at the point where i cant take it anymore.  what comes after the angry stage????  ive been angry and have been telling myself im not going to keep living like this... but what do you do?  life still goes on.. i guess,  ive been so mad lately that im surprised that i havent throwed my computer through  a window yet.  cause i sure felt like it yesterday.  but im also going through withdrawals and i have been pretty bad the last few days and went tothe er yesterday and they helped me alot.  i just pray that the new doctor i see tommorow will help me with my pain cause i dont know how much more i can take!!  so i can relate to how everyone feels about the anger and pain and so on !!!!!  take care everyone !!
                                                                       catwoman

[worried878]

worrying bout traveling cos u will be away from all ur pain relief devices..and afraid u will get stuck somewhere and be miserable!

[nick30]

it's awful how embarrassed you can feel when pain causes you to avoid simple things or makes you need to leave a situation. so many times i've been through that. sitting in a restaurant, having to leave before the main is even served. hate it.
stay and you only end up ruining the mood for everyone. a no win situation.
missing family get togethers, missing multiple appointments etc
no wonder we all get ticked off

[worried878]

i feel ur pain!  I was a bit angry yesterday but kept it to myself..so i will vent now  LOL  I had a great weekend with my guy..we dont see each other too often as he woks out of town...i am no good at sitting too long...it flares me up worse than lifting heavy stuff!  anyway..went to see Agels and Demons/good flick/half way thru the movie i was about to die!  ticked me off...to not be able to sit thru a movie and i shoulda got up and stretched or sumpin..instead i ended up leaning forward for the last half of the movie..it can every irritating when simple things that everyone else can do painlessly..hurts..it really sux...also the fact that it is never gonna go away..not in my case anyway as it has been there for 23 yrs so i dont see it completely going away..and i am thankful for the times between flare ups when i dont hurt so much...and sometimes u can even forget u have chronic pain...then it comes and rears its ugly head to remind u that ur stuck with it..it is part of me and part of who i am..and that really ticks me off!

[Mollyrae]

YES WE DO !!!   Your body is building up a tolorance to the medication and you may need an adjustment. You should discuss this with your Doctor. That's what they are there for.....to help.

Take care,
Molly

[ChronicPain1]

I know how you feel soul, I do. Between my knees, neck and back...I'd give anything to make it all stop. I just want to be pain free as I was in my early teens...I've always had medical issues like kidney stones, but those can be solved easily and the pain goes away.

Chronic pain causes me to become angry, and to even despair at my situation. I'm not someone who becomes easily depressed but it causes me to. I'm 23 and I feel like my future is hopeless sometimes, if it's this bad now, how bad will it be in 20 years?

[nick30]

or maybe try nerve meds for your pinched nerve.
or naturally occurring anti-inflammitory drugs.

[nick30]

Hi there,

asprin and ibuprofen aren't the only anti-inflammitories around. have you tried(are you able to)the stronger ones your dr can prescribe?
like naprosyn or indocid for example.
20mg of hydrocodone is not a high dose. is it possible for you to get by on nothing?
if tolerance bothers you then you'll have to make a descision about it. either increase your dose, do nothing, or quit and find alternatives.
there are other options. rather than increase your dose of hydro you could switch to another drug. maybe a low dose of a longer acting drug might be something to think about. i would try quitting 1st, then if that causes too much pain and makes your quality of life suffer too much, maybe then consider other drugs/options.

Nick

[Tuckamore]

Hello Tropicalsoul,

I hear you...and so do many of our other members. Chronic pain patients go through similar phases of grief. Guess what stage you are in??? Anger. It is not uncommon and you are entitled to be angry.

Try to find ways to release that anger. It will make you feel better. Some ppl play video games on line, others read and so on. Venting here is one good way to release. Next week we'll take a poll of how ppl cope with anger caused by their chronic pain. It may be helpful for all of us.

Your wife, like most of our mates cannot understand what you are experiencing. In time she may have better understanding. I am blessed and have a very supportive husband but there are times even he doesn't get it. But they have a lot to deal with too. And it is take some adjustment and is not always easy to live with a person that has changed from an active independant person to someone that is cp all the time.

Have you tried an antidepressant? I know I hate them too. But I have taken them twice in my life for short periods of time. I don't know if they helped or if time helped. No one could have been any angrier than I was....or am sometimes. So you are not alone if that helps at all.

Hang in there. We are here for you. You can vent any time.
Tuck